Compromise behaviors create environments that require more of the same behaviors. —Weick 1979

Sit with that a minute, and think of compromises you’ve made in relationships. Little things that seemed like nothing at the time, and then locked you into a pattern of agreement and behavior.

Find the transcript for this episode here. [https://datingkinky.com/blog/compromise-begets/] 

A couple weeks back, I reposted a writing from several years ago, in which I suggest that the responsibilities of a dominant in a D/s relationship IS the relationship. 

It’s not a popular opinion. 

I get a lot of push-back from it. ESPECIALLY from dominants. 

Find the transcript for this episode here: The Responsibility of the Dominant, Revisited - Dating Kinky

I am the B in LGBT+. And I am an ally. I am proud. Not only of myself and the journey I’ve taken through a fluid sexuality (that may again morph into something different, who knows?), but of how far public understanding and awareness has come. 

And I am also here to remind everyone how far there is yet to go. And how much there is to do. 

Find the transcript for this episode here: It’s Pride Month, Y’all - Dating Kinky

The first few hundred times it can feel awkward or silly. And when you do it with others who are not used to it, they will likely laugh nervously, because not many people are used to being asked directly whether they are being well-taken care of. 

Find the transcript for this episode here.It can be awkward and silly the first time, but just ask. - Dating Kinky

I’ve also said that one of the reasons I enjoy being a dominant is that I get “blow jobs on command.”

Find the transcript for this episode here.Great dominants are those who make others feel that they, too, can become great. - Dating Kinky

And over my life I can proudly say I’m on good terms with all the people I created long-term relationships with (more than 90 days or so), except my ex-husband.  Find the transcript for this episode here. https://datingkinky.com/blog/love/are-there-responsibilities-to-ending-a-relationship/

Let’s talk a bit about white knighting and what it is. 

White knighting has multiple definitions: 

1. Defending someone who does not wish to be defended.
2. Rushing to the defense of a general group of people, usually in the hopes that that virtue signaling will gain social points or benefits
3. People who defend or avenge another unasked, usually without knowing anything about the situation and/or without investigating the context.

Find the transcript for this episode here. https://datingkinky.com/blog/white-knighting-is-gross-yall/

What I write is not proclamations of the WON TWOO WAY, or even the statement that I think you must or should do something. 

I write to inspire thought. 

Find the transcript for this episode here.https://datingkinky.com/blog/personal/im-not-telling-you-what-to-do/

NONE of this is fair.


NONE of it.


Life doesn’t DO fair.


Find the transcript for this episode here. You’re right. It’s NOT FAIR. - Dating Kinky

Find the transcript for this episode here. https://datingkinky.com/blog/just-one-decision-can-change-your-entire-life/