Boiled alive? check. Sliced up? uh huh. Victim of irreparable psychological distress? you betcha. The boys are talking torture today

Kris and Jeremy recount the thrilling tale of the Super Smash Bros. Melee player who used a modded console to win actual tournament money playing with a hacked version of Pichu. Then they figure out which of the Smash Brothers they would chill with.

Kris and Jeremy countdown the most diabolically sinister fish in the ocean. These fish are out of control. They're evil. Lock your doors (if your doors are under water). These are Earth's most heinous fish.

Claude Frizzell Bloodgood III was a chess player and a villain. He murdered his own mother, escaped from prison, claimed to have been a literal Nazi spy, and worst of all, cheated the chess Elo rating system to become one of the highest ranked players of all time.

Kris and Jeremy discuss the largest beasts of the prehistoric era. These are some real big boys.

Kris and Jeremy watch the failed Geico TV show based on the "it's so easy, a caveman can do it" commercials and HOLY SHIT is it bad. Like it's fascinatingly bad. Like it's a weird racist metaphor for black people and they make up a whole Caveman n-word and it's starring Nick Kroll.

Kris and Jeremy decide what their Snapple Facts would be if they were Snapple tycoons and discuss the most infectious melody known to man (it's a serious disease though, no jokes).