It's August and everything is boring. Except, of course, the Dallas Stars, who have landed the 2018 NHL Draft. Carolyn & Merrin chat Draft, Texas politics, activism, philosophy, contracts, weather, and early 2000s pop punk.

Why talk about roster moves when you can sing about them? The Stars' big offseason continues and Carolyn & Merrin are excited and concerned. Excerned? Concited? Also, it always comes down to murder when Honka's involved, Carolyn is a troll, and Merrin teaches us about Canada.

Carolyn gets a solo, Merrin gets racy, the Penguins get a Cup, and the Stars might make some trades -- it's Expansion Madness! We review Wonder Woman, Houston, and Tyler Seguin's new dog. Just who does Lindsay Lohan think she is, anyway?

We're back y'all! A two month hiatus means Carolyn & Merrin have to catch up on all the recent Stars news - Hitchcock hired, Bishop signed, and there's still more to come. Not to mention, there's like some big playoff or something. Gird that groinal region, it's the Fran Drescher of podcasts!

Carolyn is MOVING! Merrin has her mind on SPACE! Gary Bettman is a ROBOT! The Stars might draft a GOALIE! The end of the season is in sight, the Olympics are out, and ice cream is a sign.

Are we done yet? Blue line questions, Nichushkin check ups, Sami the cat, Mass Effect, the USA Women's hockey strike, and rooting for the underdogs. Will Merrin survive her gut wound? Will Carolyn survive her romance novel?

[Volume Warning at the start]

It's the bye week, which means only one thing - time for a nasty head cold! Carolyn & Merrin break down the season's sadness, Jamie Benn: weatherman, trades, tacos, and talent shows. It's ok, you don't have to join our frat.

In this episode, Carolyn & Merrin discuss the Stars' dirty wins, the trade for yet another goalie, Cody Eakin's mustache, Ken Hitchcock's firing, how to stay sane in a stressful political climate, and why hockey is like Oregon Trail.

In a crazy busy week, Carolyn & Merrin take a break to talk Jim Nill: Femme Fatale, whether or not Lindy Ruff should be on the hot seat, pointless purple jerseys, if Patrick Sharp will be reunited with the Blackhawks, and can we ever fix the defense?

Is anything softer than Tyler Seguin? You tell us!

Happy New Year! It's DHH's third birthday and Carolyn and Merrin recount their wildly different NYE experiences. Also, the Stars' power play is awful, Sam Gagner is amazing, and Devan Dubnyk's Nana always knew he'd be a success. Plus, the moment you've all been waiting for -- the Dallas Stars Foundation Fancy Boys Calendar critique!