A listener's proposition — that bitcoin is the only money in the world with no protection of any kind, and that its boom and bust should therefore be the Austrian business cycle running in the open — is tested here rather than admired, and it turns out to be half right in a way that is more interesting than being wholly right: the Austrian mechanism does run inside crypto, from the private stablecoin money backed by short-dated Treasury bills to a liquidation in 2022 that ran to completion with nobody rescued while the conventional banks were made whole the very next year, and yet the deepest busts were imported from the fiat system, the biggest leverage was borrowed from the bond market, and the drawdowns are getting shallower as the safety net bitcoin was built to escape arrives quietly from outside. The examination closes on what is supported, what is contradicted, what remains genuinely unresolved, and the four markers that would settle it.