Deeper With Dee

Achieving relationship satisfaction can be difficult when you have no idea who you really are or what you want. Many times we get into relationships prematurely and don't really take the time necessary to heal between break-ups. When we do this, we rung the risk of caring passed issues, habits and expectations into the new relationship. In this episode of "Deeper with Dee", I discuss the important of self-awareness, divorcing other peoples' opinions of you, identifying what you like about the person you’re interested in and why, and answering the hard question, "If they never changed one thing about themselves, could you live with them for the rest of your life. This is part 1 of this relationship satisfaction series.

Any relationship that makes you feel worse about yourself rather than better is toxic. If it subtracts value rather than add value it’s toxic. If the relationship drains you rather than energizes you, it’s toxic. If you’re being torn down rather than built up, it’s toxic. When toxic relationships are the only type of relationship you have ever had or ever been exposed to, it can become easy to normalize it and accept it. Don’t!

In this episode of “Deeper with Dee”, I discuss 5 major ways to begin letting go of a toxic relationship:
1.Step Back.
2.Acknowledge what you see (not what you believe).
3.Set boundaries that reinforce your value (not the value of the relationship).
4.Communicate and implement your boundaries.
5.Have a support system.
Tune in Monday morning at 7AM for all the details on each step!

Deeper Than the Diet Links:
Website: https://www.spreaker.com/show/deeper-than-the-diet
Email for topic request and to be on a future episode: [email protected]

Demetris’ Links:
No Cost Consultation: Email [email protected] or visit j2fitnutrition.com and click “Join Today”
IG: www.instagram.com/j2fitnutrition/
Tik Tok: www.Tictok.com/@j2fitnutrition.com
FB: www.facebook.com/j2fitnutrition
Private Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/1061464757280751/
Youtube: www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1Zaacf_lKD0UyvIedkLRQ

Research shows that 56-60% of relationships with secure attachments last longer. Insecurities that limit growth in other attachment styles (anxious attachment and avoidant attachment) are not present in secure attachments. Thus, relationship satisfaction is high and the relationship thrives.
Secure attachments should develop in childhood from your caregiver or parents. That doesn’t always happen. When your caregiver or parents do not fill your love tank with positive messages affirming your value, are not consistently there for you, and don’t provide unconditional love, secure attachments don’t develop. This often means you will struggle to have and maintain healthy relationships as an adult.
If that sounds like you, there is hope! In this episode I discuss 5 principles to developing secure attachments including how to know your value. Of all the steps, the first and MOST important step is to know your own value BEFORE you get into a relationship. If you don’t know your own value, it’s easy to connect your value to a person/relationship just to feel valuable. What happens if they leave or the relationship does not work out for some reason? Are you any less valuable?
Tune in for more on developing secure attachments for healthier relationships.

Deeper Than the Diet Links:
Website: https://www.spreaker.com/show/deeper-than-the-diet
Email for topic request and to be on a future episode: [email protected]

Demetris’ Links:
No Cost Consultation: Email [email protected] or visit j2fitnutrition.com and click “Join Today”
IG: www.instagram.com/j2fitnutrition/
Tik Tok: www.Tictok.com/@j2fitnutrition.com
FB: www.facebook.com/j2fitnutrition
Private Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/1061464757280751/
Youtube: www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1Zaacf_lKD0UyvIedkLRQ

I could not BELIEVE she left me up there and waved at me from the ground! I was terrified that my mother did nothing to rescue me! I was 4 years old at the time when I had my first experience of anxious attachment. I fell asleep in the back of the car when my mother was headed to the body shop. Instead of her waking me up to get out of the car, she allowed me to stay asleep. Well, when I woke up, I was in the air and MILES away from the ground it seemed (More like 6 feet I’m sure). I looked out the back window crying and reaching for my mom! She simply waived from the ground, smiled and continued talking to the person standing next to her. Not long after, the mechanic was done, the car was lowered to the ground and we drove home. I could not verbalize what happened in me that day but something changed. I was anxious and did not want her out of my eyesight that day and many days and months to come. That was the beginning of an anxious attachment style that I would not learn to deal with until I was well into my adulthood!

In this episode, we will deal with 2 major types of attachment styes that are largely based out of early childhood trauma and how those attachment styles negatively impact our adult relationships if left unresolved. Anxious Attachment is an attachment style where you worry the person may not be there for you. Therefore, you go to excessive measures to keep the person close to you (excessive calling, texting, gifting, questioning, following, compromising). Avoidant Attachment is an attachment style where you also worry the relationship may not last, so you begin to distance yourself when you feel you are getting too attached to prevent yourself from getting hurt again. Both types of attachment styles can completely sabotage a relationship and make it extremely difficult to form healthy attachments or maintain them.

If you can identify with either type of attachment style or simply want to understand how they impact relationships, listen in!

Deeper Than the Diet Links:
Website: https://www.spreaker.com/show/deeper-than-the-diet
Email for topic request and to be on a future episode: [email protected]

Demetris’ Links:
No Cost Consultation: Email [email protected] or visit j2fitnutrition.com and click “Join Today”
IG: www.instagram.com/j2fitnutrition/
Tik Tok: www.Tictok.com/@j2fitnutrition.com
FB: www.facebook.com/j2fitnutrition
Private Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/1061464757280751/
Youtube: www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1Zaacf_lKD0UyvIedkLRQ

If you’re over 40 and are stuck with how to move forward or simply want to move forward with more intention, these next 2 episodes are for you! Samara Stone is an entrepreneur and a mentor to other entrepreneurs. "Be Full Grown" is one of her businesses that focuses on helping women over 40 navigate the 2nd half of their lives with more confidence and more of a focus on themselves. Demetris and Yunetta engage in a powerful conversation with Samara about practical principles women can take to make this second half of life the best half of life! Enjoy!

Quotes:
" Have you ever been on a roller coaster? What part of the ride is the fun part? The downhill part"6:38.
"This body is shifting and changing...none of us get out of here alive. it's what we do with the process of aging that makes a difference." 6:53
"Yes, it's important what you eat. But it's also important to be happy."7:00
"Once you start reversing the bitterness, resentment and lost dreams, it's like a Benjamin Button moment.”7:20
“The experience of life gets better once you know a few things about yourself.” 7:30
“People who are happiest in their 60's are people who were brave enough to make changes in their lives when things weren't going the way they'd imagined.”
“Give yourself space and time to grow without judging yourself.”
"Some people buy into the notion that my time has past. I wasted my opportunity."10:57
“Worst case scenario-lets say it doesn't go the way we planned. You're not going to die. You can always go back edit, update, shift, change , make adjustments and grow .”15:11
“Sometimes we punish ourselves for decisions when we didn't know better. Well now that you know better, do better .”11:05

If you are enjoying listening to the “Deeper than the diet Podcast” We invite you to:
1. Subscribe to be notified when we upload new episodes every Sunday.
2. Share your favorite episode with 3 people you believe could benefit from our conversations.
3. Share your takeaways by rating the podcast and leaving a review
4 @ us in your social stories & tag us on social media be sure to use the Hashtag #DeeperthantheDiet.


Deeper Than the Diet Links:
Website: https://www.spreaker.com/show/deeper-than-the-diet
Email for topic request and to be on a future episode: [email protected]

Demetris’ Links:
No Cost Consultation: Email [email protected] or visit j2fitnutrition.com and click “Join Today”
IG: www.instagram.com/j2fitnutrition/
Tik Tok: www.Tictok.com/@j2fitnutrition.com
FB: www.facebook.com/j2fitnutrition
Private Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/1061464757280751/
Youtube: www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1Zaacf_lKD0UyvIedkLRQ

Yunetta’s Links:
Counseling FB: www.facebook.com/SpringForthCounseling/
Counseling IG: www.instagram.com/SpringForthCounseling/
Ground Breakers Coaching and Consulting Instagram: www.instagram.com/groundbreakerstherapy/
Ground Breakers Coaching and Consulting Website: www.groundbreakerstherapy.com/
FB:

The conversations continues....If you’re over 40 and are stuck with how to move forward or simply want to move forward with more intention, these next 2 episodes are for you! Samara Stone is an entrepreneur and a mentor to other entrepreneurs. "Be Full Grown" is one of her businesses that focuses on helping women over 40 navigate the 2nd half of their lives with more confidence and more of a focus on themselves. Demetris and Yunetta engage in a powerful conversation with Samara about practical principles women can take to make this second half of life the best half of life! Enjoy!

Quotes:
" Have you ever been on a roller coaster? What part of the ride is the fun part? The downhill part"6:38.
"This body is shifting and changing...none of us get out of here alive. it's what we do with the process of aging that makes a difference." 6:53
"Yes, it's important what you eat. But it's also important to be happy."7:00
"Once you start reversing the bitterness, resentment and lost dreams, it's like a Benjamin Button moment.”7:20
“The experience of life gets better once you know a few things about yourself.” 7:30
“People who are happiest in their 60's are people who were brave enough to make changes in their lives when things weren't going the way they'd imagined.”
“Give yourself space and time to grow without judging yourself.”
"Some people buy into the notion that my time has past. I wasted my opportunity."10:57
“Worst case scenario-lets say it doesn't go the way we planned. You're not going to die. You can always go back edit, update, shift, change , make adjustments and grow .”15:11
“Sometimes we punish ourselves for decisions when we didn't know better. Well now that you know better, do better .”11:05

If you are enjoying listening to the “Deeper than the diet Podcast” We invite you to:
1. Subscribe to be notified when we upload new episodes every Sunday.
2. Share your favorite episode with 3 people you believe could benefit from our conversations.
3. Share your takeaways by rating the podcast and leaving a review
4 @ us in your social stories & tag us on social media be sure to use the Hashtag #DeeperthantheDiet.


Deeper Than the Diet Links:
Website: https://www.spreaker.com/show/deeper-than-the-diet
Email for topic request and to be on a future episode: [email protected]

Demetris’ Links:
No Cost Consultation: Email [email protected] or visit j2fitnutrition.com and click “Join Today”
IG: www.instagram.com/j2fitnutrition/
Tik Tok: www.Tictok.com/@j2fitnutrition.com
FB: www.facebook.com/j2fitnutrition
Private Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/1061464757280751/
Youtube: www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1Zaacf_lKD0UyvIedkLRQ

Yunetta’s Links:
Counseling FB: www.facebook.com/SpringForthCounseling/
Counseling IG: www.instagram.com/SpringForthCounseling/
Ground Breakers Coaching and Consulting Instagram: www.instagram.com/groundbreakerstherapy/
Ground Breakers Coaching and Consulting Website:

If you’re over 40 and are stuck with how to move forward or simply want to move forward with more intention, these next 2 episodes are for you! Samara Stone is an entrepreneur and a mentor to other entrepreneurs. "Be Full Grown" is one of her businesses that focuses on helping women over 40 navigate the 2nd half of their lives with more confidence and more of a focus on themselves. Demetris and Yunetta engage in a powerful conversation with Samara about practical principles women can take to make this second half of life the best half of life! Enjoy!

Quotes:
" Have you ever been on a roller coaster? What part of the ride is the fun part? The downhill part"6:38.
"This body is shifting and changing...none of us get out of here alive. it's what we do with the process of aging that makes a difference." 6:53
"Yes, it's important what you eat. But it's also important to be happy."7:00
"Once you start reversing the bitterness, resentment and lost dreams, it's like a Benjamin Button moment.”7:20
“The experience of life gets better once you know a few things about yourself.” 7:30
“People who are happiest in their 60's are people who were brave enough to make changes in their lives when things weren't going the way they'd imagined.”
“Give yourself space and time to grow without judging yourself.”
"Some people buy into the notion that my time has past. I wasted my opportunity."10:57
“Worst case scenario-lets say it doesn't go the way we planned. You're not going to die. You can always go back edit, update, shift, change , make adjustments and grow .”15:11
“Sometimes we punish ourselves for decisions when we didn't know better. Well now that you know better, do better .”11:05

If you are enjoying listening to the “Deeper than the diet Podcast” We invite you to:
1. Subscribe to be notified when we upload new episodes every Sunday.
2. Share your favorite episode with 3 people you believe could benefit from our conversations.
3. Share your takeaways by rating the podcast and leaving a review
4 @ us in your social stories & tag us on social media be sure to use the Hashtag #DeeperthantheDiet.


Deeper Than the Diet Links:
Website: https://www.spreaker.com/show/deeper-than-the-diet
Email for topic request and to be on a future episode: [email protected]

Demetris’ Links:
No Cost Consultation: Email [email protected] or visit j2fitnutrition.com and click “Join Today”
IG: www.instagram.com/j2fitnutrition/
Tik Tok: www.Tictok.com/@j2fitnutrition.com
FB: www.facebook.com/j2fitnutrition
Private Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/1061464757280751/
Youtube: www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1Zaacf_lKD0UyvIedkLRQ

Yunetta’s Links:
Counseling FB: www.facebook.com/SpringForthCounseling/
Counseling IG: www.instagram.com/SpringForthCounseling/
Ground Breakers Coaching and Consulting Instagram: www.instagram.com/groundbreakerstherapy/
Ground Breakers Coaching and Consulting Website: www.groundbreakerstherapy.com/
FB:

Yunetta and Demetris recap day 3 of their empowering speaking engagement with Pastor Trent. On day 3, they highlighted the relationship between spirituality and trauma.

Trauma can show itself in many forms, but spiritual trauma is often under-addressed and overlooked. In most cases, individuals who are consistent attendees of their place of worship are often misled about the coexistence of spirituality and therapy. Yunetta and Demetris are there to inform you that therapy and worship should not have conflicting relationships but work together to fuel each other to make you a person that is more than your trauma.

Tune into this week's episode of "Deeper than the Diet" to hear more about Demetris's relationship with the term "preacher's kid", how to work through church trauma, and how past traumas filter your current reality.

Quotes:
"Even though the platform looked a little different where I stood to speak, I did not have to abandon all that I have learned along the way and all that God has done in me and through me. (4:04-4:43)
"When you were able to be released from that idea that my life has to look like the examples that I've had before, I have to do things the same way they were done before me. You realize that your calling is updated. (6:57-7:13)
"That's why it's so powerful for pastors and ministers and people like that to get on board about the importance of spiritual health."(13:00-13:14)
"You mean I wasn't always like this. You mean there's a version of me that exists where I'm not in pain? Where is that? That's where we drive people back to God. Hey, you need God and you also need a therapist to help you pull back those layers. (15:50-16:12)
"Your template of how you see…everything filters through the lens of that belief. You don't even know what you look like, feeling valuable and worthy and beautiful and accepted. You don't know what that looks like because of your trauma." (16:51-17:09)

If you are enjoying listening to the “Deeper than the diet Podcast” We invite you to:
1. Subscribe to be notified when we upload new episodes every Sunday.
2. Share your favorite episode with 3 people you believe could benefit from our conversations.
3. Share your takeaways by rating the podcast and leaving a review
4 @ us in your social stories & tag us on social media be sure to use the Hashtag #DeeperthantheDiet.


Deeper Than the Diet Links:
Website: https://www.spreaker.com/show/deeper-than-the-diet
Email for topic request and to be on a future episode: [email protected]

Demetris’ Links:
No Cost Consultation: Email [email protected] or visit j2fitnutrition.com and click “Join Today”
IG: www.instagram.com/j2fitnutrition/
Tik Tok: www.Tictok.com/@j2fitnutrition.com
FB: www.facebook.com/j2fitnutrition
Private Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/1061464757280751/
Youtube: www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1Zaacf_lKD0UyvIedkLRQ

Yunetta’s Links:
Counseling FB: www.facebook.com/SpringForthCounseling/
Counseling IG: www.instagram.com/SpringForthCounseling/
Ground Breakers Coaching and Consulting Instagram:

What happens when “Deeper than the Diet” comes to life? According to Yunetta and Demetris, it turns into a weekend of reflecting and empowerment. Demetris and Yunetta both grew up in the church and understand all too well the deep trauma that is often masked by religion and faith. Their desire to take this message of hope and healing into a religious setting and provide practical strategies for how to move forward in healing process was realized.

During their week off of the podcast, Demetris and Yunetta had the privilege of speaking in Pittsburg at The Lighthouse Church. This was a 3 day weekend which included one night with the youth, another day with the women and their daughters and the final day with the entire congregation. During this powerful weekend, they spoke words of hope, self-encouragement and offered practical strategies to heal trauma and negative relationship with food. They even discussed the importance of knowing and acknowledging subconscious patterns within yourself and your relationships.

Tune into this week's episode of “Deeper than the Diet” to hear more about Yunetta and Demetrias's speaking engagement weekend, colorism and microaggressions growing up as black women, and seeing the purpose of their podcast come to life.

Quotes:
"You are accepted. Just like you are. Unconditionally. God loves you right now, how you are."(5:02-5:09)
We just have to make sure that the messages we are sending our young people, or people period, are messages that don't make them feel-less than." (13:43-13:58)
"Texture is your hair. How your hair matches European standards versus being more coily or kinky. However you chose to wear it. So all of those things are ingrained in us and they can create trauma." (11:39-12:09)
Them (mothers) being able to see 'I didn't get this' or 'This is how I dealt with things or how I cope'. I'm just trying to do the best I can to teach something different. It's hard to teach something that you have learned or you're not aware of." (23:45-24:02)
It's a good way to check in with yourself. Is this killing your spirit, is it killing your joy, is it destroying your vision, or is your dream. If it's doing those things, it isn’t for you." (29:04-29:17)

If you are enjoying listening to the “Deeper than the diet Podcast” We invite you to:
1. Subscribe to be notified when we upload new episodes every Sunday.
2. Share your favorite episode with 3 people you believe could benefit from our conversations.
3. Share your takeaways by rating the podcast and leaving a review
4 @ us in your social stories & tag us on social media be sure to use the Hashtag #DeeperthantheDiet.



Deeper Than the Diet Links:
Website: https://www.spreaker.com/show/deeper-than-the-diet
Email for topic request and to be on a future episode: [email protected]

Demetris’ Links:
No Cost Consultation: Email [email protected] or visit j2fitnutrition.com and click “Join Today”
IG: www.instagram.com/j2fitnutrition/
Tik Tok: www.Tictok.com/@j2fitnutrition.com
FB: www.facebook.com/j2fitnutrition
Private Facebook Group: www.facebook.com/groups/1061464757280751/
Youtube: www.youtube.com/channel/UCm1Zaacf_lKD0UyvIedkLRQ

Yunetta’s Links:
Counseling FB: