Deliberate Life™

We recorded this 2-part podcast in a very special, happy place for us, a tiny village in southern Spain, and we discuss happiness. What are the important elements of happiness for us? We touch on nature, slowness, timelessness, lack of a need to perform, presence, mindfulness, space, absence of self-doubt, the somatic experience of emotions (positive and negative), purpose, personal values, truth, freedom, pleasure, positive relationships, flow states, physical and mental wellbeing, success, attention, lightness, play and the relative joy of carrots.

We discuss some formulas for happiness, for example the relationship between happiness and success, or the relationship between happiness and expectations of life. We also discuss some distinctions for example between happiness and pleasure, happiness and desire, and happiness and purpose and we dig a little deeper into the purpose of negative emotions.

We discuss some important practical tips, we suggest to try for example meditation, gratitude writing, reflecting on personal values, lowering of expectations (desire what you have, not what you don’t have), internalising goals that you have control over (and don’t try to control things you don’t have control over), reasoning (present the negative feeling with evidence of the opposite), changing our beliefs (accept people do what they can with the resources they have), or practising kindness and compassion.

It has been a little while since you have heard from us, we took a break. This episode is a follow-up on an episode we recorded in May 2019: Episode 4, titled Decompression. We suggest you listen to that episode if you didn't already. We go deeper into this topic, and discuss the importance of taking a break from a high intensity life, and also bring it into the context of the current COVID situation. We distinguish between taking a break and taking a holiday, the two are not the same.

We discuss the reasons why we should take breaks, different ways of taking a break, for example taking a break from the clock or planning for spontaneity, the different levels of taking breaks, e.g. daily, weekly, monthly, annually, and we give some examples of our own experiences in terms the need for taking breaks and what we do to take breaks. We give some hints and tips on how listeners can take some actions, in particular to reflect on the summer break and decide what it means for the planning of future breaks.

In this episode, the 20th episode to date, we discuss trust. What do we mean by trust, how does it relate to sensemaking and news (and fake news)? We discuss for example how the Swedish COVID situation is reported in international media, and the distinction between truth and truthfulness in journalism. We discuss what makes people trustworthy, and the importance of knowing yourself and authenticity in trustworthiness. We also discuss one other important aspect of trust, which is “not lying” and what we can learn about trust from children and teenagers.

We introduce the trust equation (David Maister), and we define the different elements of the equation: the trust equation argues that we should maximise credibility (which comes from experience and subject matter expertise), reliability (quality and timeliness, and managing expectations truthfully) and intimacy (authentic connection, openness and vulnerability), whilst minimising self-orientation (people with low levels of orientation on self and high levels of empathy, curiosity and focus on others are easier to trust and executive coaches are the best dates, trust us!)

We have managed to go one and half year since starting the podcast without personality being the main topic of dialogue, so we thought it was about time. We discuss the importance of personality in how people react to the COVID-19 situation, we briefly touch on the point of neuroticism and how it impact how we react to the crisis, but the main discussion is about introversion versus extraversion, and what this means for how we we lead our lives in a world of lockdowns and physical distancing.

Western society is normally geared towards extraverts, and the past few months have been much more kind towards the lifestyles of introverted people. We discuss what this means and our hopes of what will remain in the post-pandemic world. Will society be kinder to introverts? Will the introverted lifestyle be more accepted by extraverts? Will introversion be more valued in leadership? We suggest that listeners take some time to reflect on the past few months, on their personality type and how they can integrate these insights in their post-COVID lives.

In this episode, recorded in the third week of April, we discuss compassion. Continuing the theme of the last episode, we thought it would be appropriate to follow up with a discussion on compassion, perhaps one of the most important values for humanity in these unusual times. We start by discussing distinctions between empathy, sympathy, compassion and kindness. We discuss the importance of self compassion, as well as the need for compassion for others, which also means that we acknowledge that people are in different living, work, and family situations, as well as that each person reacts differently to the general anxiety of these times and to for example the impact of physical distancing. We discuss some practical examples of compassion and acts of kindness, specific to the current times.

In this episode, recorded at Easter, we discuss radical self care. Lots of people are in lockdown, busier than ever trying to do a job, perhaps looking after children and other family members, staying in touch with friends, providing support to people that need it, selflessly being kind to others, and often the very last on their priority list is their own wellbeing. We discuss the concept of radical self care, and why it’s important, particularly now, to ensure a sustainable life.

We suggest that you need to move your own wellbeing to the top of your list, and make it a priority, once in a while, to take a break from all your responsibilities, whatever your needs are: Spending time in nature, being in solitude, listening to music, exercising, yoga and meditation, reading, writing, nesting, decluttering, doing whatever feels good or that you know is good for you. It’s important to structure and plan your day/week to be deliberate about care for yourself.

In this episode, recorded in mid March 2020, we discuss working from home. Many people, most people in fact, are housebound because of the COVID-19 situation and we thought it would be good to share some practical tips and hints on working from home. We discuss for example the importance of creating the right space to work in, tidying that space, ensuring it is a quiet space, and perhaps wearing headphones to cancel out noise from outside.

We discuss questions such as: What can you do to create some virtual social interactions? What are some of the ground rules you should put in place as a team, as families and in virtual meetings? We talk about the importance of minimising distractions, such as putting the phone on airplane mode, and we discuss the importance of being very deliberate about structuring your workday, including breaks, and what to do during these breaks, e.g. go for a walk.

In this episode, we discuss the value we can get from trying things out in our lives: Experimentation with different supplements, tools and techniques on our own bodies and minds, and then the qualitative and quantitative measurement of the impact, also sometimes referred to as biohacking. We give a range of examples from our own lives, things we have tried and tested and that have become routines and/or habits for us.

We discuss for example the benefits to the body and the mind of consuming omega-3, (home-) fermented foods, medicinal mushrooms and nootropics, and the benefits of consuming less animal protein and/or carbs/sugar. We discuss the why, what, how and when of daytime napping, (intermittent) fasting, breathwork, cryotherapy/cold exposure, sensory deprivation (flotation), forest bathing and biometric testing. We suggest you google and try some stuff out.

In this episode of the Vidya podcast, we discuss attention. We define attention as the ability to focus or concentrate on one particular thing, it is the opposite of being distracted, it comes with a sharpness of the mind. Distractions are addictive, and in a world of constant distractions and information overload, attention is becoming more and more important while at the same time it’s becoming increasingly difficult to practice attention.

We discuss the major benefits of attention: Real improvements in effectiveness and productivity, better listening, deeper connections and therefore better relationships, and higher levels of happiness/wellbeing and less stress. We also talk about the practice of training our mind for attention, through for example meditation, mindfulness in mundane daily activities, taking a break from our phones and being less scattered throughout the day.

In this episode of the Vidya podcast, we discuss learning. In this special anniversary session, exactly one year after we started this podcast, we go back to the topic we also discussed in the very first episode, this topic that’s so close to our hearts. We talk about what excites us so much about learning, why is learning so important to us, why is it an important value for both of us and why did we make it our profession.

We discuss several things around learning: The different types of learning (knowledge, skills and attitudes), learning motivation, how to prioritise learning, the learning process (experience, reflection, insight and planning), how to learn effectively, learning styles (activist, reflector, theorist, pragmatist), different methods of learning (reading, listening, watching, dialogue, application) and give some tips on how to take this forward.