Our first story today comes from 30,000 feet in the air—literally—and yet somehow manages to scrape the bottom of humanity’s barrel.

A Democrat congressman—of course it’s a Democrat—was caught watching porn on an airplane. On a flight. In his seat. In coach. Now look… I’m not here to kink-shame the elderly. If you’re 71 and still firing up the engines, congratulations, you’ve officially outlived half of Biden’s cabinet. But there’s something uniquely disturbing about a grown man, a federal lawmaker, thinking: “You know what pairs perfectly with pretzels and recycled air? Porn.”

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