“Juicy action in the future”

The panel of peril do what no other man has done before them and hoverboard over a small body of water, thereby proving themselves Best At Hoverboarding. To celebrate, they watch a film which fails to portray such a successful act, Back To The Future Part II (Robert Zemeckis, 1989) with this week’s guest Darin Lundberg of NostalgiaCast. Happy Christmas!

Marty McFly (Michael J. Fox) has been dragged back to the far flung future of 2015 by wild-haired oldster Doc Brown (Christopher Lloyd) to unintentionally cause chaos in the past! Whilst trying to prevent his own teenage son from making a bad deal, old enemy Biff Tannen (Tom Wilson) scarpers back to 1955 with a certain book that will make life misery for the McFlys.

Watch the trailer here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MdENmefJRpw

********PLOT SPOILER ALERT********

That’s right, old man Biff has taken a Sports Alamanac, with 50 years of big-time sports results, and given it to young Biff back in the 50s. Swiftly accruing a fortune from successful wagers, Biff dominates Hill Valley with his lurid casino and band of ne’er-do-wells destroying both the town and the lives of the McFly family. Can this chaos be unravelled and the timeline restored?

Did the panel enjoy this week’s televisual/cinematic serving? Could they find a way to improve the Biff’s villainous plan? And who will be named this week’s most diabolical (person/podcast((er)))?

See you sometime in 2025, Peril Pals!

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“I’m fond of the Loch Ness Monster but not enough to jizz”

The panel of peril stand before boardroom, magic marker in hand, and write “PANEL OF PERILS” on the whiteboard. They then turn the S into a $, and the rest is history. To celebrate a successful bit o’ business, they watch this week’s film Aliens (James Cameron, 1986).

Ellen Ripley (Sigourney Weaver) wakes up from a decades-long cryo-sleep only to find herself pushed back into conflict with the xenomorph$ she encountered aboard the Nostromo. Accompanied by Weyland-Yutani rep Carter Burke (Paul Reiser) and a band of Colonial Marines headed up by sexy boy Hicks (Michael Biehn), Ripley heads back to LV-426 to mop up what remains of the penis-headed not-so-sexy boys.

Watch the trailer here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oSeQQlaCZgU

********PLOT SPOILER ALERT********

Naturally Burke sees Ripley, young orphan Newt (Carrie Henn) and the team of Marines as expendable. The only thing that matters is capturing that sweet sexy xenomorph for the nefarious Company. Will he succeed by facehuggering Ripley and Newt, or will the ragtag group of roughnecks shoot their way out of a very, very bad $ituation?

What did the heck panel think of this week’s movie? How in all that is holy can they improve upon the Burke’s scheme? And which evil schemer will be christened this week’s most diabolical?

Craig, Adam and Gaz discuss the Alien franchise on Fandomentals here: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4UGzAnrlLrcqk4paSV4Zvf?si=R1JuR53FRCCFSrCx64jnJQ  and here 

https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/fandomentals/id1521728883 

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“Silly old sod* (*General Zod)”

The panel of peril emerge from their fortress of solitude (the toilet), wherein they have lost quite a lot of their own power (…). With their last ounce of strength, they pop themselves onto a comfy chair to watch this week’s film Superman II (Richard Lester, 1980).

Superman/Clark Kent (Christopher Reeve) has settled into life in Metropolis in fine style maintaining his dual identity of clumsy reporter and messiah figure with aplomb. But when he chucks a bomb into space and releases his father’s arch enemies, led by General Zod (Terence Stamp), his life is about to become an absolute disaster area!

Watch the trailer here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxD8RlGnP64

********PLOT SPOILER ALERT********

As (bad) luck would have it, Kal-El has forsaken his powers in a grand gesture of love towards the ever-spunk ace reporter Lois Lane (Margot Kidder). Needless to say, that makes planet Earth easy pickings for Zod and the gang, who are joined by snitch extraordinaire Lex Luthor (Gene Hackman) as he guides Kryptonian crims towards revenge for their imprisonment! Is the Earth doomed, or can the Man of Steel return to save the day?

What did the heck panel think of this week’s movie? How in all that is holy can they improve upon the villain’s masterplan? And which evil schemer will be christened this week’s most diabolical?

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“My gut says, absolutely bang on”

The panel of peril take some time out from whittling chess pieces out of small rocks to watch this week’s cinematic classic, The Shawshank Redemption (Frank Darabont, 1994).

After being sentenced to life in prison for the murder of his wife, Andy Dufresne (Tim Robbins) makes both friends (Red, as played by Morgan Freeman) and enemies (Warden Norton played by Bob Gunton and Captain Hadley played by Clancy Brown). But when the former financial banker becomes invaluable to the screws, they will do anything to keep him behind bars – even when new evidence on his case comes to light.

Watch the trailer here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NmzuHjWmXOc

********PLOT SPOILER ALERT********

Yes, Norton has his God-fearing fingers in many badly cooked pies. Taking bribes, laundering money, overseeing the torture and sometimes death of inmates… this guy’s a real piece of work. Will he be able to keep Andy under his thumb, helping to conceal his secret criminal enterprise, or will the tall glass of water make it out and live his dream life in Mexico?

Did the panel enjoy this week’s televisual/cinematic serving? Could they find a way to improve the Warden’s villainous plan? And who will be named this week’s most diabolical (person/podcast((er)))?

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“I remember feet”

The panel of peril very calmly walk into a room, just a normal room mind you, to watch this week’s film Panic Room (David Fincher, 2002).

Recent divorcee Meg Altman (Jodie Foster) and her daughter Sarah (Kristen Stewart) are house hunting in the affluent brownstones of New York City. Deciding upon a grand, old building – complete with an old service lift, and state of the art panic room – the ladies settle in for the first night in a new home with wine and take out. Little do they know that three armed robbers (Jared Leto, Forest Whitaker and Dwight Yoakam) have designs on something valuable left behind by the previous owners…

Watch the trailer here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sp2kKzrCm44

********PLOT SPOILER ALERT********

Turns out there’s a safe inside the panic room that they want to get to. The panic room that Meg and Sarah are hiding in. Inside the safe? A cool 22 mil in bonds; split three ways, that’s mucho moolah for our intrepid ne’er do wells. Can the diabolical trio clear the women out of the safe room, claim the booty, and get away scott free? Or is Meg more resourceful than they bargained for?

What did the heck panel think of this week’s movie? How in all that is holy can they improve upon the villains’ scheme? And which evil schemer will be christened this week’s most diabolical?

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“Takes a good eight minutes to burn a crumpet, I reckon”

The panel of peril take an ill-advised detour to a town that they have been told to never visit, a town so run-down and dilapidated that man dare not tread: Rhyl. Still, they must go, for they have a film screening to catch: Silent Hill (Christophe Gans, 2006).

Rose (Radha Mitchell), Christopher (Sean Bean) and Sharon (Jodelle Ferland) are a family troubled by nightmares of a ghost town named Silent Hill. When Rose decides the best course of action is to visit said town with Sharon, all hell breaks loose, quite literally. As ash ominously falls from the sky, they encounter bobble-headed nurses, lying figures, and Pyramid Head on the search through town, but can Rose and Sharon make it out in one piece?

Watch the trailer here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1mfnhu8sO5k

********PLOT SPOILER ALERT********

The cultish Brethren, led by Christabella (Alice Krige), who remain in the town sit at the root of the evil. They inadvertently created their own, everlasting Hell by creating their own witch trials, attempting to burn a child whose anger knows no bounds. Will Rose and Sharon be the next victims tied to the stake, or is there a bargain to be made with forces of the underworld?

Just what did the panel think of this week’s movie, pray tell? How can they improve upon Christabella’s twisted scheme? And who will be christened this week’s most diabolical?

Alan Wake II’s Herald of Darkness performed live at the Game Awards: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EMmU3mZ5gBc

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“Just don't go anywhere, that's the best thing”

The panel of peril walk home because, save for the off chance of a piano falling from a great height onto your head, it is statistically the safest form of travel. That fact is born out by this week’s film, Duel (Steven Spielberg, 1971).

David Mann (Dennis Weaver) is a middle-aged salesman driving across the Mojave desert for an important meeting. It’s a long drive, very hot, his wife (Jacqueline Scott) is none too happy with him at the moment, and to compound all of that he has raised the ire of a mysterious truck driver…

Watch the trailer here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SutDTIhbQ2g

********PLOT SPOILER ALERT********

Following a perfectly reasonable overtaking manoeuvre, Mann is relentlessly pursued by the 18-wheeler, in a deadly game of one upmanship. Though the trucker’s identity is obscured his intentions are quite clear: the vehicular homicide of our friendly neighbourhood salesman!

Did the panel enjoy this week’s televisual/cinematic serving? Could they find a way to improve the mystery man’s villainous plan? And who will be named this week’s most diabolical (person/podcast((er)))?

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“Let’s not be centaur-mental about this”

The panel of peril lay down their trusty jackhammers after a hard day’s graft at the old concrete factory. They’ll have a quick shower and pop this week’s film into their frontal cortex… it’s Total Recall (Paul Verhoeven, 1990).

Doug Quaid (Arnold Schwarzenegger) is an ordinary Earth-bound schmo-hawk who dreams of a more exciting life… on Mars. Fortunately, memory implantation company Rekall have the means to make Quaid think he was, in fact, a secret agent… on Mars. But unfortunately for him, it turns out he already was a secret on Mars… or was he? With the shadowy Richter (Michael Ironside), and wife cum enemy Lori (Sharon Stone), on his tail this is one slightly confusing mission… on Mars.

Watch the trailer here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=684nkWhd658

********PLOT SPOILER ALERT********

Mega-capitalist Cohaagen (Ronny Cox) rules the working stiffs of Mars with an iron fist, and firm control over the oxygen supply to the colonisers. In order to quell unrest among the proles he has had his secret right-hand man Quaid (!), nee Hauser, go undercover amongst the rebels in order to find their mysterious leader Kuato and neutralise him. It’s all very simple to follow, but will the plan succeed?

What did the heck panel think of this week’s movie? How in all that is holy can they improve upon the villain’s masterplan… on Mars? And which evil schemer will be christened this week’s most diabolical?

Samoa Joe vs. Kenta Kobashi from Ring of Honor can be watched here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7RpSxESOFk

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“I'll be downstairs, asleep, without my head on”

The panel of peril tie their hair in a couple of lovely plaits and don some fetching red slip-ons to watch this week’s film Return To Oz (Walter Murch, 1985).

Dorothy (Fairuza Balk) is plagued by memories of the wonderful land of Oz, and as such is completely unable to sleep. Shipped off to a suspiciously creepy ‘clinic’ by her well-meaning Aunt Em (Piper Laurie), Dorothy soon embarks on a magical journey back to the titular fantasy land. But our plucky heroine is shocked to find that things have taken a turn for the terrifying in her short absence.

Watch the trailer here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7DWx9xL23Y

********PLOT SPOILER ALERT********

The Emerald City lies in ruins, its citizens – including the Cowardly Lion and the Tin Man – turned to stone. The perpetrator is the new ruler of Oz, The Nome King (Nicol Williamson). He rules the land with a massive stony fist, ably assisted by the witch Mombi (Jean Marsh) who has a nasty habit of collecting her enemies’ heads. Can Dorothy and her pals, Billina the chicken, Jack Pumpkinhead, and Tik-Tok the clockwork robot – fend off the ghastly Wheelers on their way to dethroning the gruesome twosome?

What did the heck panel think of this week’s movie? How in all that is holy can they improve upon the villain’s masterplan? And which evil schemer will be christened this week’s most diabolical?

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“When I say Hollywood, I mean it in the loosest possible terms”

The panel of peril go backpacking through the harsh terrain of the North Wales, where nothing of any real consequence happens to them. Just as well, as they have a filmic date to get to as they have matched with Wolf Creek 2 (Greg McLean, 2013).

The Australian Outback too attracts many such backpackers. Such as Rutger (Phillippe Klaus) and Katarina (Shannon Ashlyn), visiting from Germany, who find themselves in their own personal Heaven. Soon to turn into Hell! Psychopathic, xenophobic, wildlife gamekeeper Mick Taylor (John Jarratt) has caught their trail, and has designs on a very bitter ending to the couple’s dream trip.

Watch the trailer here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s4bqeT5edbs

********PLOT SPOILER ALERT********

Temporarily rescued from Mick’s clutches by English tourist Paul (Ryan Corr), things look quite grim for everyone as Mick chases them by foot, by road, (NOT by air) and refuses to give up until he has caught them. Finally winding up in one of Mick’s many hidden, abandoned, bases across the Outback, will he devour his prey, or will the intrepid foreigners outwit the Aussie madman?

Just what did the panel think of this week’s movie, pray tell? How can they improve upon Mick’s twisted scheme? And who will be christened this week’s most diabolical?

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