Diary of a Cat Mom

Listen to this episode if you've ever cried harder over your cat than over your marriage. When a divorce reorganizes every corner of your life, your cat is often the one steady heartbeat left in the house. And when that cat stays with your ex, gets sick, or keeps reminding you of the life you lost, the grief can feel bigger than anyone around you understands.

In Episode 142 of Diary of a Cat Mom, Dagmar sits down with her longtime friend Dawn Wiggins, therapist, divorce recovery coach, integrative healer, and host of the Dear Divorce Diary podcast. They first recorded together back in 2015, and this conversation feels like two friends who have both walked through divorce with cats by their side.

Dagmar opens up about the relationship where her ex kept their cat, the hours of crying that followed, and the surprising thing that happened the moment she let go. Dawn shares how her pets kept her from feeling unmoored after her own divorce, why she checked behind every shower curtain with her "squad" at night, and why grief was never meant to be done alone.

If you're a cat mom rebuilding after divorce, this episode is a warm, honest reminder that your love for your cat is real, your grief is valid, and your healing can start with something as simple as sitting still and breathing with your kitty.

What You'll Learn in this Cat Podcast Episode

• Why losing a cat, or being left alone with one, can hurt more than the divorce itself
• How to respond (or not) when someone says "it's just a pet"
• Where the line sits between leaning on your cat for comfort and hiding from life
• How caring for cats gives structure and purpose when your old role disappears
• Ways to make a quiet house feel less lonely at night, on weekends, and on holidays
• How to grieve a cat who is still alive but now lives with your ex
• How to work through guilt, spite, and power struggles over pet custody
• Whether visitation with a shared cat helps you heal or keeps you stuck
• How to introduce a new partner to your cat, and what his reaction tells you
• One simple co-regulation practice to do with your cat this week

Timestamps & Chapters

• 00:00 Welcome: Life After Divorce and Cats with Dawn Wiggins
• 00:52 Why losing a cat after divorce hits so hard
• 01:35 Grieving the cat more than the marriage
• 06:40 When people say "it's just a pet"
• 12:17 Leaning on your cat for emotional support vs. hiding from life
• 17:04 Cats as structure and purpose after divorce
• 18:46 Coming home to a quiet house
• 22:41 When your cat reminds you of your ex
• 25:04 Coping with a senior or sick cat during divorce grief
• 28:44 Grieving a cat who lives with your ex
• 34:11 Guilt and letting go of what you can't control
• 36:46 When your ex keeps the cat out of spite
• 38:52 Pet visitation: healing or staying stuck?
• 40:47 Information vs. integration: why support groups matter
• 44:13 Dating again and introducing a new partner to your cat
• 47:05 One thing to do this week: breathe with your cat
• 48:56 What your cat bond teaches you about your next chapter
• 51:07 How to connect with Dawn Wiggins

Guest Bio

Dawn Wiggins is a therapist, divorce recovery coach, and integrative healer, and the host of the Dear Divorce Diary podcast. She helps women move through the grief, codependency, and attachment wounds that follow divorce, and guides them toward a secure, whole relationship with themselves, their community, and their support system, including through her 12-month group program. Connect with Dawn on Instagram at @dawnwiggins, on Dear Divorce Diary wherever you stream podcasts, or at mycoachdawn.com.

Guest Disclaimer

The views, opinions, and statements expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Diary of a Cat Mom or its host. Guests are solely responsible for the accuracy and content of their contributions.

Health Disclaimer

This episode is for informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical, veterinary, psychological, or legal advice. Always consult a qualified veterinarian about your cat's health and a licensed professional about your own mental health or legal situation. If you are in crisis, please contact a local emergency service or crisis line.

Never Miss an Entry
Subscribe to Diary of a Cat Mom on Substack for weekly episodes — real talk, real life, real cats — delivered straight to your inbox.

Diary of a Cat Mom is a gentle, diary-style cat podcast about everyday life with cats—created especially for cat moms 35+ in multi‑cat homes who see their cats as family.

Resources for Cat Parents
Everything I use for my cats is here: https://diaryofacatmom.com/cat-care-resources/

About the Diary of a Cat Mom Podcast

Diary of a Cat Mom is a personal cat podcast created by Dagmar Gatell, sharing real moments from life with cats. Everything shared comes from lived experience as a cat mom, not intended as professional veterinary advice. Every cat is unique, and for health concerns, always consult your trusted veterinarian.

Connect with Cat Parents. 🐾🐱
Reach an engaged community of cat parents and build trust in your brand.
→ Learn More About Authority Partnership
https://stan.store/fromhereai/p/podcast-authority-partnership

Listen to this episode to hear the day a five-year-old girl in a small German village learned where kittens went. Her father told her they "went to heaven." The next morning, she and her little sister climbed onto a box, lifted the lid of the green water barrel behind the house, and looked inside to see what heaven looked like.

In this very personal episode of Diary of a Cat Mom, Dagmar looks back fifty years to a time when cats were rodent control rather than family. They ate leftover potatoes and meat scraps, slept under the front staircase in winter, and never saw a vet. Spaying, neutering, vaccines, and parasite control didn't exist in her village. Unwanted litters were expected, and they were handled in a way that stayed with her for life.

Dagmar talks about how cat care has changed since then: spay and neuter programs, TNR, the animal welfare movement, affordable vet care, and the cultural shift that moved cats from the barn into our beds and family photos. She also shares what that childhood memory taught her about how close life and death are, and why she now stops to pet her cat.

What You'll Learn:

• What cat care looked like in rural Germany in the 1970s, including food, shelter, and medical care
• Why cats were once treated as working animals rather than pets
• How unwanted litters were handled before spay and neuter was common
• The role of spay/neuter, TNR, and the animal welfare movement in changing cats' lives
• How economics, urbanization, and cultural change turned cats into family members
• How to look back at the choices of past generations with honesty and compassion

Timestamps & Chapters:

•  (00:00) Introduction: kittens, heaven, and the water barrel
•  (00:30) Cats as function, not family
•  (01:25) Table scraps and winter shelter under the stairs
•  (02:40) No vets, no vaccines, no parasite control
•  (03:35) Short lives that nobody noticed
•  (03:55) The water barrel memory
•  (05:00) Two little girls looking for heaven
•  (05:50) Why adults called it "heaven"
•  (06:30) Life and death, right next to each other
•  (07:05) What changed: spay/neuter, TNR, and animal welfare
•  (07:35) Economy, urbanization, and cats moving indoors
•  (08:10) Vet care is now the default
•  (08:35) Then vs. now: from part of the scenery to family
•  (09:15) What I'd tell my younger self
•  (09:40) Share your then-vs-now pet story and goodbye

Never Miss an Entry
Subscribe to Diary of a Cat Mom on Substack for weekly episodes — real talk, real life, real cats — delivered straight to your inbox.

Diary of a Cat Mom is a gentle, diary-style cat podcast about everyday life with cats—created especially for cat moms 35+ in multi‑cat homes who see their cats as family.

Resources for Cat Parents
Everything I use for my cats is here: https://diaryofacatmom.com/cat-care-resources/

About the Diary of a Cat Mom Podcast

Diary of a Cat Mom is a personal cat podcast created by Dagmar Gatell, sharing real moments from life with cats. Everything shared comes from lived experience as a cat mom, not intended as professional veterinary advice. Every cat is unique, and for health concerns, always consult your trusted veterinarian.

Connect with Cat Parents. 🐾🐱
Reach an engaged community of cat parents and build trust in your brand.
→ Learn More About Authority Partnership
https://stan.store/fromhereai/p/podcast-authority-partnership

Listen to this Diary of a Cat Mom podcast episode and picture a scared little kitten hiding at the back of a shelter room, refusing to come out. Then picture a quiet check-in, a covered bed, and a little patience, until a sassy, cuddly personality shows up. That is a normal day for Sean-Patrick Malloy, Behavior and Enrichment Specialist at the SPCA Finger Lakes.

In this interview, host Dagmar sits down with Sean-Patrick for a practical, heartfelt guide to helping animals. It covers five segments: getting to know your local shelter, adoption, fostering, volunteering, and donations. You'll hear how to read your cat's emotions, what to do when you find a stray, how to pick the right cat for your home, and how to make your shelter donations count.

What You'll Learn

• What a shelter behavior and enrichment specialist does, and why emotional enrichment matters for cats
• Essential cat products: breakaway collars, ID tags, interactive toys, and a variety of scratching posts
• Why microchipping matters and how to keep your registration info current
• How spay/neuter affects cat behavior and health, and where to find low-cost options
• What to do if you find a stray, and how to check for a microchip
• How to report suspected animal abuse, and why photo or video evidence carries weight
• How to prepare your home before adopting, and why you should meet every cat before choosing
• How shelter adoption processes and fees work
• What foster-to-adopt means, and which animals need foster homes most
• How to volunteer, even if you don't want to walk dogs
• What shelters need most, and what not to donate

Timestamps & Chapters (final edit, 57:24)

• (00:00) Intro: From Stray to Stay
• (00:16) What a Behavior & Enrichment Specialist Does
• (04:12) Why Cat Parents Should Learn Cat Behavior
• (06:42) Segment 1: Must-Have Pet Products (Collars, Toys & Scratchers)
• (08:36) Microchipping & Updating Your Info
• (11:00) Spay/Neuter: Health, Behavior & How Fast Cats Multiply
• (15:23) Found a Stray? What to Do (and How to Check for a Microchip)
• (18:49) Reporting Animal Abuse Anonymously
• (20:29) Segment 2: Why Adopt from a Shelter & How to Prepare
• (26:45) How the Adoption Process & Fees Work
• (29:35) Picking the Right Cat (Including Multi-Cat Homes)
• (34:42) Segment 3: Foster-to-Adopt Explained
• (37:53) Fostering Requirements & Who Needs Fosters Most
• (44:40) Segment 4: Volunteering (Cats, Dogs & the Barn)
• (47:55) Segment 5: Donations, What Shelters Need & What to Skip
• (55:26) Where to Connect & Sean-Patrick's Message

Podcast Guest:
Sean-Patrick Malloy, Behavior & Enrichment Specialist at Finger Lakes SPCA, https://www.fingerlakesspca.org/
Reach Sean-Patrick at [email protected].

Disclaimer: The guest, Sean-Patrick Malloy, Finger Lakes SPCA, is solely responsible for the content, opinions, and advice he shares in this episode. This episode is for informational purposes and is not a substitute for professional veterinary advice.

Never Miss an Entry
Subscribe to Diary of a Cat Mom on Substack for weekly episodes — real talk, real life, real cats — delivered straight to your inbox.

Diary of a Cat Mom is a gentle, diary-style cat podcast about everyday life with cats—created especially for cat moms 35+ in multi‑cat homes who see their cats as family.

Resources for Cat Parents
Everything I use for my cats is here: https://diaryofacatmom.com/cat-care-resources/

About the Diary of a Cat Mom Podcast

Diary of a Cat Mom is a personal cat podcast created by Dagmar Gatell, sharing real moments from life with cats. Everything shared comes from lived experience as a cat mom, not intended as professional veterinary advice. Every cat is unique, and for health concerns, always consult your trusted veterinarian.

Connect with Cat Parents. 🐾🐱
Reach an engaged community of cat parents and build trust in your brand.
→ Learn More About Authority Partnership
https://stan.store/fromhereai/p/podcast-authority-partnership

Listen to this episode to meet Ela, a huge orange Maine Coon who came into Dagmar's life after his owners' divorce and Ela stayed with the ex-husband. When the marriage ended, there were three cats to split up — and Ela was the one left behind. Found on a Florida porch with a moldy water bowl, an empty food dish, and fur so matted it needed serious care, Ela was anxious, constantly bolting for the door, and desperate to run away. In this episode, Dagmar shares how patience, brushing, safe walks, and a stable home slowly turned a terrified escape artist into one of the calmest cats in her house — one who became an unexpected source of comfort for her other kitties. It's a story about what divorce and separation can mean for the pets who don't get a vote in the decision, and what it takes to help them feel safe again.

What You'll Learn

• How a divorce can upend a cat's entire world — home, people, routines, and even other pets — all at once
• Why cats left behind after a separation may show anxiety, flight behavior, or repeated attempts to escape
• How consistency, patience, and safe outdoor time helped an anxious cat settle in
• Why a cat who needed comfort himself became a source of comfort for other cats in the home
• A gentle reminder to consider pets as part of the emotional picture when relationships end

Timestamps & Chapters (6:21)

• (00:00) Introduction: What happens to cats when people divorce?
• (00:28) Meet Ela, the Maine Coon left behind after a divorce
• (01:10) Life on the porch from a cat's perspective
• (01:50) Ela's anxiety: bolting for the door and running away
• (02:35) Bringing Ela home: brushing, food, water, and safety
• (03:15) Ela becomes emotional support for Dagmar's other cats
• (04:05) Safe outdoor walks and Ela's transformation
• (04:35) What divorce really means from a cat's perspective
• (05:25) The lesson Ela taught: presence over answers
• (06:00) Closing question for listeners and sign-off

Never Miss an Entry
Subscribe to Diary of a Cat Mom on Substack for weekly episodes — real talk, real life, real cats — delivered straight to your inbox.

Diary of a Cat Mom is a gentle, diary-style cat podcast about everyday life with cats—created especially for cat moms 35+ in multi‑cat homes who see their cats as family.

Resources for Cat Parents
Everything I use for my cats is here: https://diaryofacatmom.com/cat-care-resources/

About the Diary of a Cat Mom Podcast

Diary of a Cat Mom is a personal cat podcast created by Dagmar Gatell, sharing real moments from life with cats. Everything shared comes from lived experience as a cat mom, not intended as professional veterinary advice. Every cat is unique, and for health concerns, always consult your trusted veterinarian.

Connect with Cat Parents. 🐾🐱
Reach an engaged community of cat parents and build trust in your brand.
→ Learn More About Authority Partnership
https://stan.store/fromhereai/p/podcast-authority-partnership

Listen to this episode of the Diary of a Cat Mom podcast after Dagmar went looking for cat care podcast guests and instead found a mystery. Several "cat expert" accounts kept showing up in her research, confident hosts in nurse and doctor uniforms, professional-looking sets, cats in cozy kitchens and sunny porches. But the closer she looked, the stranger it got: environments that flipped mid-video, hosts who changed appearance between clips, health books with no author name, no credentials, and no way to verify a single claim. In this episode, Dagmar walks through exactly what she noticed, why AI-generated "experts" are becoming harder to spot, and the simple questions every cat parent should ask before trusting advice that could affect their cat's health.

What You'll Learn in this Cat Podcast

• Why AI-generated "experts" can look and sound completely convincing
• The red flags Dagmar spotted in the videos and websites she researched (inconsistent settings, changing hosts, missing credentials)
• Why having "no name" and "no contact info" behind cat health advice is a major warning sign
• How relying on quick AI answers can quietly weaken our critical thinking
• The key questions to ask before trusting any online cat care source
• Why online information should never replace a real veterinarian

Timestamps & Chapters

• 00:00 – Can we trust cat experts on social media?
• 00:20 – Researching podcast guests and finding red flags
• 00:55 – AI-generated hosts, cats, and environments that don't add up
• 1:35 – No name, no credentials, no contact info on their websites
• 2:10 – How AI creates convincing "experts" — uniforms, confidence, believable sets
• 2:35 – How relying on instant AI answers changes how we think
• 3:15 – Bringing back critical thinking: the questions to ask
• 3:55 – Trusted cat care books worth reading (The New Natural Cat, Cat Owner's Home Veterinary Handbook, Decoding Your Cat)
• 4:35 – Why books and AI still don't replace your vet
• 5:00 – Final thoughts and a question for listeners

Never Miss an Entry
Subscribe to Diary of a Cat Mom on Substack for weekly episodes — real talk, real life, real cats — delivered straight to your inbox.

Diary of a Cat Mom is a gentle, diary-style cat podcast about everyday life with cats—created especially for cat moms 35+ in multi‑cat homes who see their cats as family.

Resources for Cat Parents
Everything I use for my cats is here: https://diaryofacatmom.com/cat-care-resources/

About the Diary of a Cat Mom Podcast

Diary of a Cat Mom is a personal cat podcast created by Dagmar Gatell, sharing real moments from life with cats. Everything shared comes from lived experience as a cat mom, not intended as professional veterinary advice. Every cat is unique, and for health concerns, always consult your trusted veterinarian.

Connect with Cat Parents. 🐾🐱
Reach an engaged community of cat parents and build trust in your brand.
→ Learn More About Authority Partnership
https://stan.store/fromhereai/p/podcast-authority-partnership

Listen to this episode of the Diary of a Cat Mom podcast to learn why cat happiness starts with a calm home. A calm cat parent helps create a calm, happy cat — especially when a cat is sick or anxious. Dagmar has cared for over fifty cats during her lifetime. She explains how a cat's nervous system mirrors the energy of their cat parent or in its home environment. Dagmar shares natural tools like 528 Hz music containing cat purring sounds, singing bowls, and catnip that may help a cat relax. Always check with your vet first.

The cat podcast episode was inspired by a real conversation. A friend's cat was recently diagnosed with a mass and given only two or three months to live. As the cat refused medicine and food, his anxiety grew — and so did the cat mom's. That moment became the spark for this episode's core message: our cats feel what we feel, and staying calm ourselves may be one of the most meaningful things we can do for our furry babies.

What You'll Learn:

• Why cats act as emotional "mirrors" of their cat parents and home environment
• How a dysregulated nervous system in humans can increase anxiety in cats
• Natural tools that may help support a calm, relaxed cat (music frequencies, singing bowls, catnip)
• Why staying calm matters even more when a cat is sick or aging
• The difference between supporting your cat and projecting anticipatory grief onto them
• Why every vet consultation matters before trying new calming methods

Timestamps & Chapters (4:13 total):

• 0:00 – Introduction: Cat happiness starts with a calm home
• 0:20 – A friend's story: a cat diagnosed with a mass
• 0:48 – When medicine and mealtime become a struggle
• 1:10 – The connection between a calm home and a calm cat
• 1:35 – How stress, traffic, and daily frustration follow us home
• 1:58 – "Kitties are our mirror": how cats reflect our nervous system
• 2:25 – Natural calming tools: 528 Hz music, purrs, and singing bowls
• 2:50 – Using high-quality catnip to help a sick cat relax (always check with your vet)
• 3:15 – The real work: staying calm and loving through illness
• 3:35 – Are we grieving a loss that hasn't happened yet?
• 3:50 – Final reflection and listener question
• 4:05 – Outro: See you at the next entry

Never Miss an Entry
Subscribe to Diary of a Cat Mom on Substack for weekly episodes — real talk, real life, real cats — delivered straight to your inbox.

Diary of a Cat Mom is a gentle, diary-style cat podcast about everyday life with cats—created especially for cat moms 35+ in multi‑cat homes who see their cats as family.

Resources for Cat Parents
Everything I use for my cats is here: https://diaryofacatmom.com/cat-care-resources/

About the Diary of a Cat Mom Podcast

Diary of a Cat Mom is a personal cat podcast created by Dagmar Gatell, sharing real moments from life with cats. Everything shared comes from lived experience as a cat mom, not intended as professional veterinary advice. Every cat is unique, and for health concerns, always consult your trusted veterinarian.

Connect with Cat Parents. 🐾🐱
Reach an engaged community of cat parents and build trust in your brand.
→ Learn More About Authority Partnership
https://stan.store/fromhereai/p/podcast-authority-partnership

Listen to this episode of the Diary of a Cat Mom podcast as Dagmar shares her personal experience navigating Florida's rainy season and its impact on community cats. If you're a TNR caregiver, cat colony feeder, or animal rescue volunteer in Florida, you'll recognize the challenges she describes — from sandy soil pulling shelters loose to flooding that now happens almost every day. This is one caregiver's honest reflection on what she's seeing and feeling as conditions change.

Tune in to hear how flooding has gotten worse in recent years, what happens to outdoor cat shelters when floodwaters hit, and why this issue is personal to Dagmar as a longtime community cat caregiver.

What You'll Learn in This Episode

• Why Florida's rainy season has become a year-round challenge — and how daily flooding now rivals what used to only happen during hurricanes
• The hidden problem with sandy soil — why it makes anchoring outdoor cat shelters especially difficult compared to other regions
• What happens when floodwaters hit a cat shelter — even a well-anchored one — and why height alone isn't enough to keep community cats safe
• The real health risks flooding creates for outdoor cats — including colds, injuries, and infections that follow in the aftermath
• How TNR (Trap-Neuter-Return) and no-kill policies shape outdoor cat populations — and why that makes flood-resistant shelter solutions more urgent

Timestamps & Chapters

• 00:00 Intro: Florida's Rainy Season Challenge
• 00:35 The Shelter Height Problem
• 01:05 Florida's Sandy Soil Challenge
• 01:40 When Floods Pull Shelters From Their Anchors
• 02:20 From Occasional Storms to Daily Flooding
• 02:55 Health Risks: Colds, Injuries & Infections
• 03:35 TNR, No-Kill Shelters & More Cats Outdoors
• 04:15 Dagmar's Vision: Building Caregiver Communities
• 04:50 Share Your Experience & What's Coming Next

Never Miss an Entry
Subscribe to Diary of a Cat Mom on Substack for weekly episodes — real talk, real life, real cats — delivered straight to your inbox.

Diary of a Cat Mom is a gentle, diary-style cat podcast about everyday life with cats—created especially for cat moms 35+ in multi‑cat homes who see their cats as family.

Resources for Cat Parents
Everything I use for my cats is here: https://diaryofacatmom.com/cat-care-resources/

About the Diary of a Cat Mom Podcast

Diary of a Cat Mom is a personal cat podcast created by Dagmar Gatell, sharing real moments from life with cats. Everything shared comes from lived experience as a cat mom, not intended as professional veterinary advice. Every cat is unique, and for health concerns, always consult your trusted veterinarian.

Connect with Cat Parents. 🐾🐱
Reach an engaged community of cat parents and build trust in your brand.
→ Learn More About Authority Partnership
https://stan.store/fromhereai/p/podcast-authority-partnership

Press play and step outside with Dagmar's cats. In this episode of Diary of a Cat Mom, she takes you through a typical outdoor adventure with her Florida cats — harnesses on, commands set, senses fully switched on. You'll hear exactly what changes when a calm, sleepy indoor cat gets 30–45 minutes in the grass, sun, and wind, and why that daily dose of nature matters so much for feline wellbeing.

In this episode, you'll hear:

• Why indoor cats are calmer but outdoor time unlocks something different
• How harness training and command training make outdoor time safe
• The sensory experience that stimulates a cat's brain and instincts
• Why Dagmar is now researching a hurricane-safe catio for her Florida home
• What to consider for a peaceful catio in a multi-cat household

Timestamps & Chapters

0:00 – Intro: Cat Life Behind Glass vs. In Nature
0:12 – Daily Outdoor Routine & Command Training
0:38 – Harness Cats vs. Senior Cats Outside
0:58 – Instincts Coming Alive
1:22 – Indoor Cats: Calm but Curious
1:42 – The Full Sensory Experience Outside
2:05 – A Human Comparison: Office Life vs. Nature
2:28 – Planning the Ideal Catio
2:55 – Multi-Cat Catio Challenges
3:20 – Closing & What's Next

If you're considering more outdoor enrichment for your cat — or researching how to build a hurricane-safe catio in Florida — this episode is for you.

Have a catio in Florida already? Dagmar wants to hear about your experience — reach out and share your story!

Never Miss an Entry
Subscribe to Diary of a Cat Mom on Substack for weekly episodes — real talk, real life, real cats — delivered straight to your inbox.

Diary of a Cat Mom is a gentle, diary-style cat podcast about everyday life with cats—created especially for cat moms 35+ in multi‑cat homes who see their cats as family.

Resources for Cat Parents
Everything I use for my cats is here: https://diaryofacatmom.com/cat-care-resources/

About the Diary of a Cat Mom Podcast

Diary of a Cat Mom is a personal cat podcast created by Dagmar Gatell, sharing real moments from life with cats. Everything shared comes from lived experience as a cat mom, not intended as professional veterinary advice. Every cat is unique, and for health concerns, always consult your trusted veterinarian.

Connect with Cat Parents. 🐾🐱
Reach an engaged community of cat parents and build trust in your brand.
→ Learn More About Authority Partnership
https://stan.store/fromhereai/p/podcast-authority-partnership

Does singing actually calm cats down? Ever come home to a chorus of hungry, demanding meows the second you walk through the door? In this Diary of a Cat Mom podcast episode, Dagmar shares the moment she came home from a stressful shopping trip to find her cats crying for an early meal — and how she instinctively started singing an old Austrian operetta song her parents played when she was young. Within minutes, her cats calmed down completely.

Curious whether it was a fluke, Dagmar dug into the research on what singing actually does to the body — and it turns out there's real science behind it. 

In this episode she breaks down:

• How singing stimulates the vagus nerve through throat and vocal cord vibrations
• Why this shifts your body out of "fight or flight" and into "rest and digest"
• How the slow, controlled breathing of singing mimics meditation and signals safety to the brain
• The connection between singing and lower cortisol (stress hormone) levels

Timestamps & Chapters

• 00:00 Coming home stressed to hungry, crying cats
• 00:35 Growing up with operetta in Germany
• 00:50 The song I started singing
• 01:10 The cats go calm and quiet
• 01:30 So I looked into the research...
• 01:40 Vagus nerve stimulation
• 02:05 Rest and digest: the parasympathetic shift
• 02:25 Long exhales and meditation-like breathing
• 02:45 Lower cortisol, lower stress
• 03:00 Do you sing to your cats? Share in the comments

Turns out, calming your cats might start with calming yourself.

Do you sing to your cats? Share your story in the comments!

This episode reflects general research on singing and the nervous system, shared for informational purposes — it's not medical or veterinary advice. If you or your cat are dealing with a health or anxiety issue, please check with a professional.

Never Miss an Entry
Subscribe to Diary of a Cat Mom on Substack for weekly episodes — real talk, real life, real cats — delivered straight to your inbox.

Diary of a Cat Mom is a gentle, diary-style cat podcast about everyday life with cats—created especially for cat moms 35+ in multi‑cat homes who see their cats as family.

Resources for Cat Parents
Everything I use for my cats is here: https://diaryofacatmom.com/cat-care-resources/

About the Diary of a Cat Mom Podcast

Diary of a Cat Mom is a personal cat podcast created by Dagmar Gatell, sharing real moments from life with cats. Everything shared comes from lived experience as a cat mom, not intended as professional veterinary advice. Every cat is unique, and for health concerns, always consult your trusted veterinarian.

Connect with Cat Parents. 🐾🐱
Reach an engaged community of cat parents and build trust in your brand.
→ Learn More About Authority Partnership
https://stan.store/fromhereai/p/podcast-authority-partnership

Can a cat actually change your attachment style? In this Diary of a Cat Mom podcast episode, Dagmar shares her personal journey from anxious attachment — the constant need to help, rescue, and prove her worth to others — to a secure, grounded sense of self, and how her cats played an unexpected role in getting her there. She breaks down the four steps that helped her stop over-giving, start setting boundaries, and finally feel calm and secure without depending on anyone else for it.

If you've ever felt like you have to earn love by being needed, or you struggle to ask for support when you need it most, this episode is for you.

What You'll Learn:

• The difference between anxious, avoidant, and secure attachment styles
• Why "helper" and "rescuer" patterns are often signs of anxious attachment
• How to practice internal communication and state your needs clearly
• Simple emotional regulation techniques (Kabbalah, 528 Hz music, singing bowls, belly breathing)
• Why setting boundaries isn't selfish — it's self-protective
• How cats model secure, boundaried love without losing affection

Timestamps & Chapters: 

• 00:00 Welcome to Diary of a Cat Mom 
• 00:08 Dagmar's history with anxious attachment 
• 00:50 The helper/rescuer pattern and its emotional cost 
• 01:35 How cats helped shift Dagmar toward secure attachment 
• 02:20 Step 1: Learn your patterns 
• 02:35 Step 2: Practice internal communication and self-care 
• 03:05 Step 3: Regulate your emotions 
• 03:55 Step 4: Set clear personal boundaries 
• 04:35 The secret to secure attachment: consistency and predictability 
• 04:55 Share your story + outro 
• 05:41 End

Dagmar's experience is personal — if you're navigating attachment struggles, a licensed therapist can help.

Never Miss an Entry
Subscribe to Diary of a Cat Mom on Substack for weekly episodes — real talk, real life, real cats — delivered straight to your inbox.

Diary of a Cat Mom is a gentle, diary-style cat podcast about everyday life with cats—created especially for cat moms 35+ in multi‑cat homes who see their cats as family.

Resources for Cat Parents
Everything I use for my cats is here: https://diaryofacatmom.com/cat-care-resources/

About the Diary of a Cat Mom Podcast

Diary of a Cat Mom is a personal cat podcast created by Dagmar Gatell, sharing real moments from life with cats. Everything shared comes from lived experience as a cat mom, not intended as professional veterinary advice. Every cat is unique, and for health concerns, always consult your trusted veterinarian.

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