KIRK CAMERON'S SAVING CHRISTMAS is the worst movie we have ever seen. Happy Holidays

Watch it here if you hate yourself

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DEADLY CRUSH is a softcore porno about a lady who has a bunch of sex with a ghost. And we know the guy whose childhood home it was filmed in! And he’s our special guest this week! Max Kohl joins the boys in the studio to reveal all of the secrets of the best paranormal erotica ever made, AND tell the tale of how his dad was duped into renting out their home to the production company. Is Max’s childhood ruined forever by ghost sex? Steve and Justin are here to find out.

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What makes DOLLMAN the most dangerous cop in NYC? He’s a 13-inch alien with the most powerful gun in the universe. This week, Steve and Justin look through the microscope and try to make sense of Albert Pyun’s 1991 sci-fi classic starring the Clint Eastwood of B-movies, Tim Thomerson (TRANCERS). And even if it all comes up short, there are shockingly few dick jokes for a movie about a ‘13-inch man’. 

Watch DOLLMAN HERE for free!

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Like a dream-within-a-dream, the GEICO CAVEMEN TV SHOW was a 30-minute commercial with ad breaks. Justin and Steve look back at the Nick Kroll starring sitcom adaptation of one of television's most beloved ad campaigns. A sitcom that would also become a part of television history, but for the exact opposite reasons. Was the show just ahead of its time? Did CAVEMEN walk so TED LASSO could run? All the boys know for sure is that it has no business trying to solve racism. Watch the full pilot here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xlt5_nTFx4&t=5s

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HAWK JONES is a cop, a hero, a lover, a loner, a fighter, and most importantly- he’s a six-year-old kid. And so is EVERY OTHER ACTOR in this 80s cop thriller set in the fictional city of Minitropolis. Why? Who cares when you have 90 minutes of kids in mustaches slinging one-liners and fighting crime?

So gear up, grab a lollipop, and join Justin and Steve as they breakdown one of the oddest oddities in the DISASTERPIECE cannon

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Office Max made a Punk’d-style reality show with The All-American Rejects. Yes. That’s a real sentence. On this episode of DISASTERPIECES, Steve and Justin examine SCHOOLED, the Office Max commercial that pretends it’s an hour-long TV special. Why does this thing exist? Did it actually help a failing school-supply retailer sell more printers? And is it ethical to absolutely torture real school children all in the name of creative marketing? Find out these and more in this perfect time capsule of the capitalistic nightmare of mid-2000s television.

Watch OfficeMax Schooled here: https://vimeo.com/193925396

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It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s FLYIN’ RYAN! The terrible family movie brought to you by Heelys, yes the shoes with wheels in them. Actor/comedian Anne Hogan swoops in to help Justin and Steve breakdown a movie where a child literally has the power of flight but no one really seems to care. Concrete answers may be sparse, but giggle fits will be bountiful.

Just don’t forget your skateboard.

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Candy Corn. It’s sweet, silky, and has been a staple of the candy store during the last THREE CENTURIES. So why does everyone hate one of the best-selling sweet treats of all time? Steve and Justin rip open a bag of the divisive tri-colored devils to get to the bottom of America’s love/hate relationship with Candy Corn… even if it spells doom for their tummies, and forever ruins the concept of ‘edging’ for you.

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You know what this is. Say it.

THE LAST VAMPIRE ON EARTH. The most egregious TWILIGHT rip-off of all time. Comedian Emily Panic joins the boys and lends some of her paranormal expertise to help break down a vampire movie that arguably might not even have a real vampire in it. And with an IMDB summary like this: ‘A second-hand report of a man vomiting after eating chicken leads a preacher to believe a vampire is afoot. Luckily for the guy, his girlfriend has AIDS which allows him to be spared' You know Steve and Justin are going to need all of the help they can get

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The BBC television special GHOST WATCH is unironically amazing—like it’s really, really good. So why are Steve and Justin talking about this paranormal phenomenon from 1990? Because the aftermath of this fake live broadcast is one of the worst and most tragic disasters they have ever covered.

It's a story that has to be heard to be believed. So turn out the lights, get cozy in your glory hole, and if you hear something strange... it's just a British actor accidentally doing a Jeff Goldblum impression...

CHECK OUT GHOST WATCH HERE:

https://archive.org/details/Ghostwatch

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-_t7Ww78aM

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