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Super Rough Transcript:

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[00:00:00] Wake up. Everyone. It’s Christmas. Coolest most is the greatest time of yeah, but you and Jordan’s most relieved to get up. It only comes right once again. There is snow outside me something vehicle through the window, and then you will just coming down the Kimberley. [00:01:00] Fortune. Presence underneath the tree and everybody knows.

It’s Christmas. It’s Christmas. It’s Christmas. He breaks it Sunday December 17th 2017 coming up on the program today fucking our founding fathers patriotic porn + old. Valle can’t put on socks eating your dead mommy’s ashes and horse dildo aftermath all coming up today on me. It’s the distorted view show with Tim Henson.

You know the taste of semen is quite a flavor Dimension back here with you as promised for a weekend show got a good one for you today. I started my Christmas shopping this weekend. I may have waited too long this year, I got. [00:02:00] K you heard me last year boasting about how all my presents were huge hits and the rest of my family look like out of touch assholes chunks with their generic Gifts of sweaters and board games that only old people play, but seven-year-old wouldn’t be ecstatic to receive, Parcheesi.

Meanwhile I’m fucking over. You know these digital cameras in Hatcher moles money’s No Object. It’s Christmas. It’s the spirit of giving and more importantly being named The Best Gift Giver the competition. I take very seriously unfortunately. Like Icarus who flew too high I thought I could do no wrong so I kept putting off these shopping trips and finally I this weekend.

I looked at the messages that my sister sent me regarding what these uh little. children wanted for [00:03:00] Christmas. It’s beyond like stuff. I’ve never heard of if it was just so never heard of I just Google it figure out what it is. Go to the store and buy it, but what they’re asking for is not sold anywhere except for like one place like my sister for instance.

I got her dumb name on the gift exchange that my family does and she wanted a Harry Styles Kadoka. She’s a pedophile. She still with him right. She he’s like 20 children my sisters like I don’t know 80 or something so she she wants a Harry style t-shirt or hoodie or something, but you can only get it from an Etsy shop in the Etsy Shop turnaround time is like five weeks, and I should make today’s featured image this Harry Potter sure.

It’s some mspaint CafePress old looking garbage. It’s got [00:04:00] it. Just like full random shit. I don’t know. I don’t know what Harry Styles is all about. I don’t know if his like logo is a kiwi, but that’s what’s like on the the front of the shirt. But like where the the the pocket would be on one of the sides.

There’s like is this kiwi like this clipart someone did a Google search for a kiwi and slap that on this black shirt then down along the sleeve. It says Harry Style in villach default Arial or Times, New Roman font. And then on the back just as generic looking with no regard to spacing or centering its just like this list of songs that I guess are on his CD no design effort.

What was put into this you have to see this thing, but that’s what my sister wanted. Oh,