On this week's episode: Trump lowers the crime rate in Washington DC by committing fewer crimes ... It ain’t easy being green energy ... And America just says no to Cracker Barrel.

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Headline Sources:

Trump threatens to take over other cities now that DC is under his control: https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025/aug/22/trump-troops-dc-new-york-chicago

How Trump Used 10 Emergency Declarations to Justify Hundreds of Actions: https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2025/08/22/us/politics/trump-emergency-immigration-tariffs-crime.html

Hegseth and RFK Jr make a very sad push-ups and pull-ups fitness challenge video together: https://www.dailydot.com/viral-politics/pete-hegseth-mocked-over-pull-up/

Trump targets Smithsonian: https://www.washingtonpost.com/entertainment/art/2025/08/21/white-house-smithsonian-exhibitions-targets/

Tariffs on Wind Turbines: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/08/21/us/politics/trump-investigation-tariffs-wind-turbines.html

Cracker Barrel does VERY badly with logo change and pegging: https://www.axios.com/2025/08/21/cracker-barrel-new-logo-stocks-maga

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/right-winger-slams-new-woke-version-of-cracker-barrel-game_n_68a7518be4b0e8c4a7241889

On this week's episode: Marsh needs to see some ID before he can tell you what’s happening in his country ... The DOJ is definitely hiring from Monster.com ... And we learn how flying monsters from the Book of Revelation might affect your weekend.

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Headline Sources:

Texas enlists FBI to hunt down fugitive Democrats: https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2025/08/07/fbi-cornyn-texas-democratic-lawmakers-flee/

What are the new UK online safety rules and how will age checks on adult content be enforced?: https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2025/jul/24/what-are-the-new-uk-online-safety-rules-and-how-will-they-be-enforced

Video shows Department of Justice official urging Jan. 6 rioters to 'kill' cops:

https://www.npr.org/2025/08/07/nx-s1-5493197/doj-trump-jan-6-defendant-jared-wise-capitol-riot

Tim Cook hands Trump a bribe trophy at the White House on live TV:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2025/08/07/trump-tim-cook-gift-white-house-apple/

MP mistakes charity rowers for 'illegal migrants': https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cdd32lnq445o

ICE Offers, Then Quickly Withdraws, Cash Bonuses for Swiftly Deporting Immigrants: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/08/05/us/politics/ice-bonuses-immigrants-deportations.html

RADIOACTIVE WASPS ARE A THING NOW: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/08/01/science/radioactive-wasps-nuclear-savannah-river.html

On this week's episode: The Department of Justice wonders if a find and replace for JUMP will work out for them ... Trump will stop just short of throwing a smoke bomb in the middle of a press conference ... And we talk about solutions to the long history of misandrist toilet technology.

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Headline Sources:

Trump retaliates against Wall Street Journal after they publish naked lady bday letter to Epstein: 

https://www.wsj.com/politics/trump-jeffrey-epstein-birthday-letter-we-have-certain-things-in-common-f918d796

FBI asked to "flag" Epstein files that mention Trump: https://www.axios.com/2025/07/18/epstein-documents-trump-fbi-senator

Johnson Cuts Short House Business to Avoid Vote on Releasing Epstein Files: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/07/22/us/politics/mike-johnson-ends-house-session-epstein-vote.html

Coca-Cola to launch new US soda with cane sugar this fall: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/coca-cola-cane-sugar-trump-post/

Trump’s bid for autocracy scores key wins in the media and academia:  https://apnews.com/article/stephen-colbert-late-show-cbs-end-8bad9f16f076df62c0ffc50e9c8adbab

https://www.washingtonpost.com/education/2025/07/26/columbia-university-settlement-monitor/

Trump to sign executive order to push cities to make homelessness more illegal: https://ground.news/article/trump-to-sign-order-pressuring-cities-states-on-homelessness

You can Venmo the national debt, apparently: https://www.axios.com/2025/07/24/venmo-gifts-public-debt

Trump tries to rewrite history on being ‘fooled’ by Putin:

https://www.cnn.com/2025/07/15/politics/trump-putin-rewrite-history-analysis

Trump's new plan is to sell weapons to NATO allies and they'll give support to Ukraine: https://www.scrippsnews.com/politics/foreign-policy/a-smart-plan-ambassador-matthew-whitaker-explains-us-deal-to-sell-weapons-to-nato-for-ukraine

US Ambassador to NATO Matt Whitaker sold big dick toilets: https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2018/11/democrats-demand-info-on-acting-attorney-general-matthew-whitaker-masculine-toilet-scam

On this week's episode: We’ll spend more time digging into the details of the “One Big Beautiful Bill” than most of the people who voted for it ... Marsh will try not to get us arrested by the UK government for terrorism ... And Marco Rubio takes on a 5th job as the Prince of Nigeria?

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Headline Sources:

Insane, evil, and incredibly reviled One Big Beautiful Bill Act is now law: https://www.vox.com/politics/418599/one-big-beautiful-bill-act-details-explained

https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c0eqpz23l9jo

Priest, 83, arrested at Palestine Action protest: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/c9vrjkev802o

New direct action group 'Yvette Cooper' emerges: https://www.thenational.scot/news/25291394.new-direct-action-group-yvette-cooper-emerges/

Grok goes full Mecha-Hitler, its words: https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2025/jul/09/grok-ai-praised-hitler-antisemitism-x-ntwnfb

Rift erupts among Justice, FBI leaders over Epstein memo: https://www.washingtonpost.com/national-security/2025/07/11/trump-bondi-patel-bongino-epstein-files/

https://www.wonkette.com/p/fbi-epstein-client-list-does-not

Reform UK puts teenagers in charge of vital public services: https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2025/jul/05/nigel-farage-reform-uk-teenage-councillors-vital-public-services

Reform councillor’s boast about removing ‘trans-ideological’ books from children’s library sections falls flat: https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2025/jul/04/reform-councillors-boast-about-removing-trans-ideological-books-from-childrens-library-sections-falls-flat 

Reform UK to introduce less stringent ‘common sense’ vetting system for candidates: https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2025/jul/07/reform-uk-to-introduce-less-stringent-common-sense-vetting-system-for-candidates

Scammer clones Marco Rubio’s voice, fools disturbing number of people: https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025/jul/08/marco-rubio-ai-impostor

On this week's episode: The big beautiful bill goes on a parliamentarian diet ... Donald Trump tries to bomb himself into a peace prize ... And Matt Gaetz's mom isn't mad; she's disappointed.

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Headline Sources:

Big Beautiful Bill’s passage in serious question: http://npr.org/2025/06/25/nx-s1-5445185/trump-gop-megabill-senate

Can Mamdani’s Energetic Campaign Be a Blueprint for Democrats?: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/26/us/politics/mamdani-campaign-democrats.html

https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2025/06/maga-bigots-are-losing-their-minds-over-a-muslim-socialist-possibly-becoming-nycs-mayor/

Bombing Iran but isolationist style:  https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/22/us/politics/trump-iran-decision-strikes.html

https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/26/world/middleeast/iran-nuclear-program-israeli-us-attacks.html#link-58d1cda

https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/ce9x809vgrro

Noah's idiot congressman nominates Trump for peace prize: https://www.thedailybeast.com/maga-sycophant-buddy-carter-leads-charge-to-get-trump-a-nobel-peace-prize/ https://www.theguardian.com/world/2025/jun/25/pakistan-trump-nobel-peace-prize-nomination-iran-strikes https://www.newsweek.com/donald-trump-nobel-peace-prize-nomination-withdrawn-ukraine-russia-2089818

A Boise Bar’s “Hetero Awesome Fest” Was a Straight-Up Flop: https://www.them.us/story/boise-bar-hetero-awesome-fest-daniel-hamrick-protest-song

https://www.ktvb.com/article/news/local/dozens-attend-hetero-festival-in-idaho-boise/277-64864d25-d10a-49d8-bb05-57b943c08ab8

Matt Gaetz's embarrassing text conversation with his mom is revealed by person sitting behind him on a plane: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-14842867/matt-gaetz-messages-mother-advice-trump.html

On this week's episode: We’ll go full tea on the Musk-Trump breakup ... At least 1.6% of America showed up to make sure Trump had a shitty birthday ... And Heath's getting married.

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Headline Sources:

Best worst best best messy breakup fight of all time: https://www.cnn.com/business/timeline-elon-musk-trump-x-dg

https://www.the-independent.com/news/world/americas/us-politics/trump-musk-timeline-twitter-truth-social-apology-regret-b2767891.html

https://www.cnn.com/2025/06/11/politics/musk-vance-wiles-phone-call

Trump’s expensive stupid teeny tiny parade: https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2025/06/13/us/trump-military-parade.html

And wanting to use it on protesters: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/10/us/politics/trump-military-parade-protests.html

Democratic lawmaker forcibly removed from Kristi Noem’s press conference: https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c5ygn48djrko

NYC mayor's race in final stretch with Andrew Cuomo somehow still in front: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/12/nyregion/debate-takeaways-mayor-nyc.html

Mamdani and Lander cross-endorse each other to leverage ranked-choice voting: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/13/nyregion/mamdani-lander-endorsement-nyc-mayor.html

New China trade ‘deal’ takes US back to where it started: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/11/us/politics/us-china-trade-deal-trump.html

Anti-Trump protests are yuge: https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2025/06/14/no-kings-protests-anti-trump-rallies-us/

On this week's episode: Make America Healthy Again starts to sound an awful lot like the great reset ... We start wondering why there isn’t a Pulitzer for “best press conference question” ... And X hits a person like a Tesla on autopilot.

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Headline Sources:

MAHA report is full of enormous amounts of nonsense: https://www.mcgill.ca/oss/article/medical-critical-thinking-health-and-nutrition/maha-report-mostly-data-vibes

https://www.washingtonpost.com/health/2025/05/30/maha-report-ai-white-house/

Harvard wins initial court fight to keep its international students: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/05/29/us/harvard-international-students-trumps.html

A hidden measure in the big beautiful bill would crown Trump king: 

https://www.justsecurity.org/113529/terrible-idea-contempt-court/

Donald Trump learns about TACO trade: https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/trump-lashes-viral-taco-trade-meme-stand/story?id=122323324

Elon leaves the White House with a bunch of lies: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/05/30/us/politics/fact-check-elon-musk-trump.html

Elon Musk got punched in the face by a 5-year-old: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/05/30/us/politics/elon-musk-black-eye.html

On this week's episode: Donald Trump is Qat-hard pressed to refuse a gift ... RFK Jr. goes swimming in water that had disgusting, disease-causing sewage in it before he got in ... And the White House has a very special birthday boy.

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Headline Sources:

Trump does a Middle East bribing tour: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/05/16/us/politics/trump-middle-east-visit.html https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2025/05/12/trump-plane-qatar-politics/ https://www.newsweek.com/donald-trump-administration-qatar-links-2072706

DHS Reviews Reality Show Pitch Where Immigrants Compete for US Citizenship: https://ground.news/article/kristi-noem-working-on-reality-show-pitting-immigrants-against-each-other-for-citizenship

Trump's big beautiful bill is doomed: https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/2025/05/16/gop-hard-liners-block-trumps-big-beautiful-bill-taxes-immigration/ https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/congress/senate-republicans-put-house-notice-wont-accept-trump-agenda-bill-chan-rcna206705

RFK Jr. goes swimming in sewage with his family: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/05/12/us/politics/rfk-jr-rock-creek-bacteria.html

And openly admits you should NOT take health advice from him: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/05/14/us/politics/rfk-jr-hhs-overhaul-hearing.html

TX Democrats propose resolution to ban Cruz from college playoffs calling him a "well known curse": https://ground.news/article/houston-democrats-eyeing-to-end-cruz-curse-with-banning-of-senator

Trump’s fascism parade will cost well over $45 million: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/05/15/us/politics/trump-parade-army-birthday-cost.html

On this week's episode: Elon Musk spends infinity dollars for everyone to hate him ... Americans "celebrate" DJT’s first 100 days of the term ... And Trump drove our Chevy to the levy but the levy was high.

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Headline Sources:

Elon Musk on his way out: 

https://apnews.com/article/trump-musk-doge-tesla-government-cuts-c47211544c5382a6207779ee95c6060b 

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2025/05/02/musk-doge-cuts-congress-budget/ 

https://www.cnn.com/2025/04/30/business/tesla-board-elon-musk-ceo-search/index.html

Anonymous HHS report recommends conversion therapy without consulting any experts:

https://ground.news/article/trumps-health-agency-urges-therapy-for-transgender-youth-not-broader-gender-affirming-health-care_577b6d

Trump says kids need to take some economic pain:

https://www.nytimes.com/2025/04/30/us/politics/trump-tariffs-dolls-comment.html

Tariff nonsense being claimed as a "winning deal" by Howard Lutnick:

https://www.nytimes.com/2025/04/28/business/economy/howard-lutnick-trump-tariffs.html

Trump celebrates 100 days in office with sycophantic cabinet meeting:

https://newrepublic.com/post/194648/maga-far-right-reaction-trump-kim-jong-il-style-cabinet-meeting

Apple Violated Antitrust Ruling, Federal Judge Finds:

https://ground.news/article/apple-violated-antitrust-ruling-federal-judge-finds_60156e

Pete Hegseth is having a really bad time: 

https://www.politico.com/news/2025/04/22/pentagon-infighting-hegseth-fired-officials-00302709 

https://www.npr.org/2025/04/28/nx-s1-5380220/trump-hegseth-pentagon 

https://thehill.com/policy/defense/5271365-colin-carroll-pentagon-official-fired/

On this week's episode: A Democratic senator gets to do his very own Taken movie ... The Secretary of Education gets a little saucy ... And Vice President Vance shows off his football skills with a very sad endzone jance dance.

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Another amazing word of the day from Susie Dent:

https://bsky.app/profile/susiedent.com

Headline Sources:

Senator meets with Kilmar Abrego Garcia in El Salvador: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/04/18/us/politics/abrego-garcia-chris-van-hollen-el-salvador.html

https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2025/04/18/nayib-bukele-tweet-margaritas-kilmar-abrego-garcia/

https://abcnews.go.com/US/timeline-wrongful-deportation-kilmar-abrego-garcia-el-salvador/story?id=120803843

RFK seeks the 'environmental' cause of autism; scientists say it's not that simple:

https://www.npr.org/sections/shots-health-news/2025/04/16/nx-s1-5366676/autism-cdc-rates-rfk-research

SCOTUS keeps hold on Trump’s restrictions on birthright citizenship but sets May arguments: https://ground.news/article/61859ea0-7270-41a4-a748-faa73998aee4

Trump’s Education Chief Linda McMahon Repeatedly Calls AI ‘A1’ in School Speech: https://gizmodo.com/trumps-education-chief-linda-mcmahon-repeatedly-calls-ai-a1-in-school-speech-2000587329

A.1. responds after Linda McMahon mistakes it with AI: https://www.yahoo.com/news/1-responds-linda-mcmahon-mistakes-181537903.html

CNN Data Chief Says Talk About Trump World Is Part Of A 'Fanciful Universe': https://ground.news/article/do-americans-regret-voting-for-trump-here-are-the-facts-worldnetdaily-by-wnd-staff?utm_source=headline-link&utm_medium=share

JD Vance drops college football national championship trophy: https://www.nytimes.com/2025/04/14/us/politics/jd-vance-ohio-state-football-trophy.html