Paul had just listed many of the sinful human behaviors that were causing divisions in the early church and damaging their witness. Then he provided the solution for fixing those natural human behaviors. Paul didn’t say, “Act kind to one another.” Rather, he said, “Be kind.” Another translation could say “Become kind.”  

The work of the Holy Spirit in our lives is to change us, to help us become more like Christ each day. Scripture often refers to that growth process as our sanctification. God doesn’t want children to simply act kindly toward one another. He wants us to be kind. If we apply that thought to raising our children, we can easily understand the difference. Kindness shouldn’t be measured by our actions; it should become our character. 

Paul then used a word that is rarely used in Scripture and is difficult to translate. But his first-century readers would have understood completely. It's the word tenderhearted or, in some versions, compassionate. It's worth knowing because embedded in that one word is a measure we should each use for our own lives. 

How do we know if we are truly “tenderhearted” toward others?  

To be compassionate means to “feel with.” People in Paul’s culture understood what it meant to walk by a person who was hurt, see their wound, and have their stomach clench. They knew when their hearts ached with the grief another person was feeling. They understood the physical, visceral sensations associated with “compassion,” or feeling with, another person. That sensation had a word in the original language of Scripture, and Paul used that word in his letter to the Ephesians.  

We have become tenderhearted, compassionate Christians when we care enough to feel with other people. A person who cares like that has become a Christian who will know how to love and forgive like Christ. 

Allow the word of Christ to dwell in you richly and become the tenderhearted, forgiving character of Christ to others.