The "M" stands for Mackenzie because without her, Episode 40 wouldn't be chock full o' aliens or deceased pets or active diarrhea or bad accents or a bunch of conspiracy theories! So make yourself a cranberry sauce cocktail (aka the Fixin') and join Erin "Mulder" and Nicole "Scully," as they investigate the Rendlesham Forest Incident! This one's for you, Stumbelina!

Happy Thanksgiving, America! If you're a stateside listener, we hope this year brings you a Thanksgiving spread free from political commentary and distant relative stank. But chances are, you're sitting ringside to "A Very MAGA Thanksgiving 2017," while your step uncle-in-law continuously douses himself in Drakkar Noir. The maybe, potentially silver lining? The mall opens at 6pm and you can channel all of your resulting aggression into a box store stampede. Or better yet, you can hide out in grandma's sewing room, scream crying into a pillow between bites of pumpkin pie. Speaking of moist, the DTFU ladies are thankful for YOU think year, Listener!

"Aww, you shouldn't have." - Britney Jean Spears --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Today's topic is the Hope Diamond, which was the inspiration behind the "keep your mouth shut and your brain empty" necklace in Titanic. And that film was supes popular when Britney was Making the Video for "Oops" in a red pleather jumpsuit and white eyeshadow. So naturally, it worked itself in. Was the Titanic cursed? Is Britney Jean cursed? Is the Hope Diamond cursed? Yes, cursed by bad choices.

It was only a matter of time before Erin and Nicole, both born and raised in Southern California, landed on the topic of traffic. We're not talking your standard rush hour traffic, oh no. This is the traffic nightmares are made of. Buckle up, Dudes, because- oh, actually, wait. This freeway is a parking lot. Looks like people are getting out of their cars. Is that a BBQ? Ok, we're going to be here for a while.

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Warning: There's a bit of a screamy-jump thingy at the 21:48 mark of this episode - mind your ear holes. If you can make it past that, you've got enough embarrassing audio to blackmail our hosts for, oh let's say roughly the next 5 years. JK, our hosts give zero Augustus Gloops. Learn about the sleepover ritual/game "Bloody Mary," the consequences of playing the game in a dark bathroom (hint: there aren't any), and the historical figure(s) the game might be loosely based on.

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Come mah lady, come come mah lady (and dudes)! This week brings a very special episode of DTFU Podcast as we celebrate the original meathead's birthday! Erin is completely almost surprised by the birthday facts Nicole shares, but it turns out the real heroes are the listeners who delivered amazing, f****d up birthday stories! So many laughs, new nicknames, old turns of phrase and a few sound effects. Oh! And a drinking game! But still no Kenny Rogers impression. Drink along responsibly.

Get ready for the most HERiFFic listener story you're ever going to hear. It was submitted anonymously and honestly, it's for the best because you'd never be able to look this person in the eye again. If it's even a person, it was submitted anonymously so who knows. After a few laughs and gags and "how'd that even happens," Erin and Nicole transition nicely into the practice of ancient Egyptian mummification. Come for the putrefaction details. Stay for the bad puns.

Most cults are oppressive, sad and poor. This cult is oppressive and sad, but it's rich, bitch! In fact, it's so wealthy, their estate in Northern California has a fully functioning restaurant, museum, amphitheater and winery! For a cult that keeps thinking the end of the world is coming, it seems a bit much. Also, Erin does the snake oil salesman voice again, and Nicole laughs.

Also known as, "Final Destination 6: Welcome to TinkerHELL." Disneyland is the happiest place on earth, but it's a place that tens of millions of people visit each year. Statistically speaking (assuming Erin and Nicole could do math), a few people are going to have a bad time. And in a few instances, a really, really bad time. Not a particularly fun episode, but full of f****d up, in an admittedly magical setting.

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This week's topic seemed innocuous enough...until Erin and Nicole started talking about it! There's no subject these two ladies (and "ladies" is not used ironically here, but I see why you might think that) can't bring back to body parts and/or fluids. Only DTFU Podcast can take a topic as boring as an astronomer from the 16th century, and find a way to circle back to dirty deeds. Silent-laugh along with Erin and Nicole as they discuss the minimally interesting accomplishments, but extremely interesting pets, of Tycho Brahe!