Ease Lessons for Writers

TODAY'S GUEST: ELIZABETH
Today's episode is my second with Elizabeth who is in the process of becoming. She currently does laundry, dishes, drives carpools, and fills remaining “confetti time" with reading, writing, playing piano, thinking, and staring at a screensaver of a vine-covered tree. Along with her husband, she cares for two human children and an elderly pug in Richmond, Virginia, USA. Prior to this all-consuming undertaking, she worked as a writer and professional naming consultant for 20+ years on more than 150 product and corporate naming projects. In 2010, she published Finding Thalhimers (Dementi Milestone Publishing) about her father’s family and their department store, which existed for 150 years. Elizabeth loves breakfast, expensive dark chocolate, unapologetic authenticity, and laughing really hard. 

Thanks for this conversation, Elizabeth.


HOMEWORK INVITATIONS
1. Writing while Parenting

• Create a time box (two to three hours) for your writing.
• Decide how many days a week you would like to write and choose whether you will track your writing through time or words.
• Track your writing between now and our next conversation with the knowledge that you get to rejig your plan going forward.
• Remember you are going to write this novel one draft (or pass) at a time.

2. Blasphemy
Create a permission slip for yourself to write the most blasphemous things.

3. Parenting (from Elizabeth)
What are you parenting?

TODAY WE MENTIONED
1. Books:
Love that Dog: A Novel by Sharon Creech
Hate That Cat: A Novel by Sharon Creech

2. A poem in response to the prompt: What cannot be destroyed
Write a poem about the idea of what cannot be destroyed. Elizabeth gave Monna the same homework.

Courage, my love
by Monna McDiarmid

When I imagine people
reading my poems and stories
my face flashes red,
the lion that lives in my chest
shakes its head
stands
and roars.
It's either menopause or shame.
A shame that predates the event.
Time traveling
Anticipatory shame.

Publishing feels impossible, all those eyes 
on my shitty sentences.

Slam
the heavy wooden box of words
closed.
Bury it in the backyard.
Never speak of this again.

The wise crone in me says,
“Everyone feels this way. Everyone.
You think they will judge you? They will.
Even if you don’t publish a word.
Decide what you want, love.
Decide what you want.”

She’s a magnificent bitch, my crone
and she’s right.
The lion stops roaring,
saunters into my jungle
hot and verdant.

All the hard things have led me to this.
Loss of love, health, and money,
that one terrible boss.
I’ve been collecting my courage
to light myself on fire
with the heat 
of my own words.

*****

ABOUT EASE LESSONS:
Music: “Meekness” by Kai Engel, used under Creative Commons Attribution license

Editor: Damien Pitter

Host: Monna McDiarmid (pronounced Mona McDermid) | Coach, Writer and Counselor
Website: MonnaMcDiarmid.com
Newsletter: The Sunday Reader
Patreon:  where I share monthly excerpts from my writing memoir in progress
Instagram: @monnamcdiarmid

ABOUT TODAY'S GUEST: ELIZABETH
Today's episode is my first with Elizabeth who is in the process of becoming. She currently does laundry, dishes, drives carpools, and fills remaining “confetti time" with reading, writing, playing piano, thinking, and staring at a screensaver of a vine-covered tree. Along with her husband, she cares for two human children and an elderly pug in Richmond, Virginia, USA. Prior to this all-consuming undertaking, she worked as a writer and professional naming consultant for 20+ years on more than 150 product and corporate naming projects. In 2010, she published Finding Thalhimers (Dementi Milestone Publishing) about her father’s family and their department store, which existed for 150 years. Elizabeth loves breakfast, expensive dark chocolate, unapologetic authenticity, and laughing really hard. 

Thanks for this conversation, Elizabeth.


Elizabeth's Invitations from Episode 1:
1. Couldn't get it wrong | What would I do if I couldn’t get it wrong?
Write about this idea or dictate your thoughts, or make a poem.

 2. Ritual | Create a ceremony for the letting go.
Employ a ritual that will deeply communicate this letting go to the current version of you, and help set you free.

3. Letter from your protagonist
Write a letter from your protagonist Emilia to you, The Writer,  explaining why it’s important for you to write this book. What does this novel mean for her? What does the novel create or set in motion or set free?

4. What cannot be destroyed
Write a poem about the idea of what cannot be destroyed. You have given me the same homework ~ a delightful invitation that I happily accept.

*****

ABOUT EASE LESSONS:
Music: “Meekness” by Kai Engel, used under Creative Commons Attribution license

Editor: Damien Pitter

Host: Monna McDiarmid (pronounced Mona McDermid) | Coach, Writer and Counselor
Website: MonnaMcDiarmid.com
Newsletter: The Sunday Reader
Patreon:  where I share monthly excerpts from my writing memoir in progress
Instagram: @monnamcdiarmid

ABOUT TODAY'S GUEST: JUN SEKIYA
This is my second conversation with Jun Sekiya, a writer of scripts, novels, and raps from Yokohama, Japan. He currently lives in Brooklyn, New York, where he works as the creative assistant of Soman Chainani, author of the YA fantasy series “The School for Good & Evil”, soon to be a film from Netflix. Jun is working on a novel about an expat kid split between two cultures and friend-groups at his Tokyo international school. His logline is a work-in-progress. When not on his grind, Jun can be found in the local park doing soccer tricks and chasing after dogs who steal his soccer ball. He’s 5’6, decently quick, and is currently training for a marathon.

You can follow Jun on Instagram at jun.sekiya
You can watch his films (including the trailer for Knightman and Diploma) at https://vimeo.com/junsekiya

Thanks for this conversation, Jun.


Jun's homework invitations from Episode 2:
1. Consider the question: "How will I know that my novel is done?"
2. Choose a date on which you will celebrate that you have finished your novel.
3. Compile a list of agents to whom you could submit your novel.

+ a second interpretation of a homework invitation from Week 1:
Love Letter | Write a short story for your friends (the ones you wrote about in Tokyo Fable) and share it with them. This is just for fun and there is no pressure to ever share this with anyone else.

During this conversation, we talk about:
1. Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators (SCBWI) + the SCBWI Winter Conference in New York City.
2. Holly Thompson, author of Orchards and The Language Inside.

*****

ABOUT EASE LESSONS:
Music: “Meekness” by Kai Engel, used under Creative Commons Attribution license

Editor: Damien Pitter

Host: Monna McDiarmid (pronounced Mona McDermid) | Coach, Writer and Counselor
Website: MonnaMcDiarmid.com
Newsletter: The Sunday Reader
Patreon:  where I share monthly excerpts from my writing memoir in progress
Instagram: @monnamcdiarmid

About today's conversation:
This is my third conversation with Heather J. Patel, a writer currently editing her debut memoir -  an intimate portrayal of the toll family secrets and shame have on early identity. She lives in the Bay Area with her husband, son, and sweet rescue dog. She received her Bachelor’s degree from UC Berkeley.

Thank you, Heather, for this conversation. 

Follow Heather:
Instagram: hjpatelwrites
Website: HJPatelWrites.com

Heather's homework invitations from Episode 2:
1. You had asked about placing more space between your inner critic and your writing self.  Please ask yourself, "How can I love this part of me?" What does it look like to love our harshest critic? How might you do that? How might/would your critic respond to that love?

2. Write a letter, prayer or blessing to your discomfort.

3. Make a list of all the things that writing gives you or provides for you.

4. Make yourself a small-ish (10-15 card) Jason Cheerleading Deck of Writing Inspiration. These might be quotes or kind words from friends or something your father has said to you.

5. Consider how you'd like to show up online as a writer. You get to do this in The Divine Heather Way ~ whatever that looks like for you. Possibilities include a website, a one page landing page, starting a newsletter and creating a first Instagram post on hjpatelwrites.

Our conversation includes references to the following:

• Turning the (In)Visibility Cloak into a Cape
• Exercise in which you remember other areas in which you've been successful, had setbacks and kept going ~ from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
• Vulnerability Hangover (a term popularized by Brene Brown)
• Body Work: The Radical Power of Personal Narrative by Melissa Febos
• Heather attended a reading by Ashley C. Ford, author of Somebody’s Daughter: A Memoir
• Keeping a binder/collection of notes of encouragement from readers (including beloved readers)
• "You learn from the part of the story you focus on.” — Hannah Gadsby, Nanette 
  
  

*****

About Ease Lessons:
Music: “Meekness” by Kai Engel, used under Creative Commons Attribution license

Editor: Damien Pitter

Host: Monna McDiarmid (pronounced Mona McDermid) | Coach, Writer and Counselor
Website: MonnaMcDiarmid.com
Newsletter: The Sunday Reader
Patreon:  where I share monthly excerpts from my writing memoir in progress
Instagram: @monnamcdiarmid

About today's conversation:
This is my third conversation with Megan Sunstrum who is writing a memoir about depression, anxiety, being a badass and moving across the country during a pandemic to start a new life. She has a wild imagination, a knack for story-telling, and a deep love of talking to strangers, green things and also furry things. She lives in rural Nova Scotia with her husband and beautiful menace of a cat.

Thank you, Megan, for this conversation.

A note to the listener that this episode contains multiple references to anxiety and depression as these issues are central to Megan’s memoir. I am not a therapist so I am not coaching Megan through these issues and, as always, I encourage people to seek out a therapist for support with their mental health.

Megan's homework from Episode 2:

1. Read another memoir(s):

• Hourglass: Time, Memory, Marriage by Dani Shapiro
• Expecting Adam: A True Story of Birth, Rebirth, and Everyday Magic by Martha Beck
• These Precious Days: Essays by Ann Patchett
• This Messy Magnificent Life: A Field Guide by Geneen Roth
• A Life in Stitches: Knitting My Way Through Love, Loss and Laughter by Rachael Herron

2. Write a love letter from (or to) your younger Bad Ass Self

3. Would you like a Guardian Angel of some kind for your process? A small altar?

4. Think about where the four points of your plot might be so we can discuss them at the beginning of Conversation 3.

5. Listen to this Creative Penn podcast episode with Gail Carriger about the Heroine's Journey here. The interview begins at 22:05.

*****
About Ease Lessons:
Music: “Meekness” by Kai Engel, used under Creative Commons Attribution license

Editor: Damien Pitter

Host: Monna McDiarmid (pronounced Mona McDermid) | Coach, Writer and Counselor
Website: MonnaMcDiarmid.com
Newsletter: The Sunday Reader
Patreon:  where I share monthly excerpts from my writing memoir in progress
Instagram: @monnamcdiarmid

About today's conversation:
This is my second conversation with Maile Topliff, a lifelong lover of words – her elementary school nickname was Webster.  She believes that the stories we tell can change our lives. She is currently writing her first non-fiction book – an invitation for the reader to listen to the call to be the author of their own story. Call it a heliograph or for the current day.  It’s about the beauty of a quiet quest and the life’s work of curiosity, empathy, fear, courage, being and the magic of moments.  She currently lives in the Twin Cities in Minnesota.  She received her Bachelor’s degree in English from Hamline University.  You can find her on Instagram at MaileTopliff_writer.

Thank you, Maile, for this conversation.

You can follow Maile on Instagram.

Maile's homework invitations from Episode 2:
1. Read The Beatryce Prophecy by Kate DiCamillo.
2. When you are ready, share one sentence of your own words from your MS on your Maile Writer IG.
3. Choose an accountability buddy or partner for this project. Experiment with and rejig your plan whenever needed both in terms of how often you write and for how long. You could also upgrade your accountability conversations to High Tea.
4. Consider choosing a date by which you'd like to finish your first draft or even a publication date. As with all the above, do only what is helpful and genuinely motivates you at this moment in your life.
5. Bonus: Read The Heroine's Journey: For Writers, Readers, and Fans of Pop Culture by Gail Carriger

During this conversation, we discussed the following:

• “When you regain a sense of your life as a journey of discovery, you return to rhythm with yourself. When you take the time to travel with reverence, a richer life unfolds before you. Moments of beauty begin to braid your days.” ~ John O’Donahue
• "We shall all, in the end, be led to where we belong. We shall all, in the end, find our way home." from The Beatryce Prophecy by Kate Dicamillo
• The Gathering Room with Martha Beck | Episode: Your Forever Home
• The Heroine's Journey: For Writers, Readers, and Fans of Pop Culture by Gail Carriger
• Monna recommends The Parasol Protectorate Series (Genre: Steampunk, Paranormal romance | 5 books) by Gail Carriger

*****
About Ease Lessons:
Music: “Meekness” by Kai Engel, used under Creative Commons Attribution license

Editor: Damien Pitter

Host: Monna McDiarmid (pronounced Mona McDermid) | Coach, Writer and Counselor
Website: MonnaMcDiarmid.com
Newsletter: The Sunday Reader
Patreon:  where I share monthly excerpts from my writing memoir in progress
Instagram: @monnamcdiarmid

ABOUT TODAY'S GUEST: JUN SEKIYA
This is my second conversation with Jun Sekiya, a writer of scripts, novels, and raps from Yokohama, Japan. He currently lives in Brooklyn, New York, where he works as the creative assistant of Soman Chainani, author of the YA fantasy series “The School for Good & Evil”, soon to be a film from Netflix. Jun is working on a novel about an expat kid split between two cultures and friend-groups at his Tokyo international school. His logline is a work-in-progress. When not on his grind, Jun can be found in the local park doing soccer tricks and chasing after dogs who steal his soccer ball. He’s 5’6, decently quick, and is currently training for a marathon.

Thanks for this conversation, Jun.

Jun's homework invitations from Episode 1:
1. Love Letter | Write a short story for your friends (the ones you wrote about in Tokyo Fable) and share it with them. This is just for fun and there is no pressure to ever share this with anyone else.
2. Nutshell | Logline formula from Rachael Herron
a) Job title (of protagonist)
b) Name
c) Has what already?
d) But when ________, will she _________?
3. Theme Park List | When I finish and publish my novel, I get to...

During this conversation, we talk about:
1. John Green's YA novel Looking for Alaska.
2. John Green's podcast (and book) The Anthropocene Reviewed.  We talk specifically about the episode: Capacity for Wonder and Sunsets.
3. The concepts of a Commonplace Text (also called a a Commonplace Book).
4. This quote: "If you can’t be cheesy, you can’t be free."  Dan Harris used the quote in an episode of Ten Percent Happier but, according to Twitter, he doesn't know who said this originally.
5. Podcast: Harry Potter and the Sacred Text
6. The idea of slant rhyme or near rhyme
7. Ru Paul's Drag Race


*****

ABOUT EASE LESSONS:
Music: “Meekness” by Kai Engel, used under Creative Commons Attribution license

Editor: Damien Pitter

Host: Monna McDiarmid (pronounced Mona McDermid) | Coach, Writer and Counselor
Website: MonnaMcDiarmid.com
Newsletter: The Sunday Reader
Patreon:  where I share monthly excerpts from my writing memoir in progress
Instagram: @monnamcdiarmid

About today's conversation:
This is my second conversation with Heather J. Patel. Heather is a writer, currently editing her debut memoir -  an intimate portrayal of the toll family secrets and shame have on early identity. She lives in the Bay Area with her husband, son, and sweet rescue dog. She received her Bachelor’s degree from UC Berkeley.

You can find her on Instagram at hjpatelwrites.

Thanks for this conversation, Heather.

References from today's conversation:

• Book: The Heroine's Journey: For Writers, Readers, and Fans of Pop Culture by Gail Carriger
  
  

*****

Upcoming Poetry Course | Collected: Creating a tiny book of your poetry
This course is for people who want to write poetry and create a small collection of their poetry for themselves, loved ones, or to publish on their website or elsewhere. What would happen if you saw yourself as the gatekeeper of your own poetry?
Check out the course at monnamcdiarmid.com/collected

*****

About Ease Lessons:
Music: “Meekness” by Kai Engel, used under Creative Commons Attribution license

Editor: Damien Pitter

Host: Monna McDiarmid (pronounced Mona McDermid) | Coach, Writer and Counselor
Website: MonnaMcDiarmid.com
Newsletter: The Sunday Reader
Patreon:  where I share monthly excerpts from my writing memoir in progress
Instagram: @monnamcdiarmid

About today's conversation:
Megan Sunstrum is writing a memoir about depression, anxiety, being a badass and moving across the country during a pandemic to start a new life. She has a wild imagination, a knack for story-telling, and a deep love of talking to strangers, green things and furry things. She lives in rural Nova Scotia with her husband and beautiful menace of a cat.

Thanks for this conversation, Megan.

A note to the listener: This episode contains references to anxiety and depression as these issues are central to Megan’s memoir. I am not a therapist so I am not coaching Megan through these issues and, as always, I encourage people to seek out a therapist for support with their mental health.

References from today's conversation:

• Fast-Draft Your Memoir: Write your Life Story in 45 Hours by Rachael Herron
• Holy Heathen: A Spiritual Memoir by Katherine North
• Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience by Brene Brown
• Hourglass: Time, Memory, Marriage by Dani Shapiro
• Expecting Adam: A True Story of Birth, Rebirth, and Everyday Magic by Martha Beck
• These Precious Days: Essays by Ann Patchett
• This Messy Magnificent Life: A Field Guide by Geneen Roth
• A Life in Stitches: Knitting My Way through Love, Loss, and Laughter by Rachael Herron
• Quote: “You own everything that happened to you. If people wanted you to write warmly about them, they should have behaved better.” ~ Anne Lamott

Upcoming Poetry Course | Collected: Creating a tiny book of your poetry
This course is for people who want to write poetry and create a small collection of their poetry for themselves, loved ones, or to publish on their website or elsewhere. What would happen if you saw yourself as the gatekeeper of your own poetry?
Check out the course at monnamcdiarmid.com/collected

*****

About Ease Lessons:
Music: “Meekness” by Kai Engel, used under Creative Commons Attribution license

Editor: Damien Pitter

Host: Monna McDiarmid (pronounced Mona McDermid) | Coach, Writer and Counselor
Website: MonnaMcDiarmid.com
Newsletter: The Sunday Reader
Patreon:  where I share monthly excerpts from my writing memoir in progress

About today's conversation:
This is my second conversation with Maile Topliff, a lifelong lover of words – her elementary school nickname was Webster.  She believes that the stories we tell can change our lives. She is currently writing her first non-fiction book – an invitation for the reader to listen to the call to be the author of their own story. Call it a heliograph or for the current day.  It’s about the beauty of a quiet quest and the life’s work of curiosity, empathy, fear, courage, being and the magic of moments.  She currently lives in the Twin Cities in Minnesota.  She received her Bachelor’s degree in English from Hamline University.  You can find her on Instagram at MaileTopliff_writer.

You can follow Maile on Instagram.

Thank you, Maile, for this conversation.

*****

Upcoming Poetry Course | Collected: Creating a tiny book of your poetry
This course is for people who want to write poetry and create a small collection of their poetry for themselves, loved ones, or to publish on their website or elsewhere. What would happen if you saw yourself as the gatekeeper of your own poetry?
Check out the course at monnamcdiarmid.com/collected

*****

About Ease Lessons:
Music: “Meekness” by Kai Engel, used under Creative Commons Attribution license

Editor: Damien Pitter

Host: Monna McDiarmid (pronounced Mona McDermid) | Coach, Writer and Counselor
Website: MonnaMcDiarmid.com
Newsletter: The Sunday Reader
Patreon:  where I share monthly excerpts from my writing memoir in progress
Instagram: @monnamcdiarmid