Mark interviews Denise Massar, a writer, an adoptee, and a mom via birth and adoption about her new memoir MATCHED and the ten-year journey she took getting it published.

Prior to the main content, Mark shares comments from a recent episode, a personal update, and a word from this episode's sponsor.

This episode is sponsored by Cruising Writers.

During their conversation Mark and Denise talk about:

• How Denise had been "big five or die" when it originally came to her publishing dream and how and why that changed over the years
• Some of the feedback that Denise's agent got back on submission of her memoir in 2020 and how they fueled her in a positive way
• Denise's agent coming up with a strategy to change the title, to wait a year as publishing shifts and movements within editorial departments would naturally occur, then to try to send it out on sub to the market again
• Some of the limitations within traditional publishing that happen with titles that might be perceived by some as "somewhat similar"
• How memoir from an "unknown" person is one of the hardest things to sell
• Prince Harry's penis
• Having run the course with her agent on this book, and the respectful mutual decision to part ways
• Submitting the book to a number of university presses without her agent
• The sudden health scare that turned out to be a benign lump that Denise had to have surgery to remove
• Resetting those initial big dreams that she had about what would happen when her book was finally published
• The importance of her kids seeing her "finish this book" that she'd been working on for 10 years
• Deciding to take the indie publishing approach which allowed her several freedoms, including changing the title back to MATCHED, working with the cover designer artist that she knew and liked, among other things
• Leveraging 60 different ARC readers for her memoir
• The power of hearing readers say things like "me too" - and "I never knew that anybody else went through that" and other ways a writer can come to feel that their writing resonates with readers
• Writing about her own adoption and realizing that for the first six months of her life, before she was adopted, that she must have been in foster care
• Altering the names of some of the people in the book in order to preserve their privacy
• How the eight different birth mothers Denise was in contact with via the course of adopting her son who ended up changing her life
• Advice Denise would give to her younger self as well as advise she'd give to beginning authors
• And more . . .

 

After the interview Mark reflects on just how significant it is when an editor provides any sort of feedback beyond a form/token "not for us at this time" rejection, as well as an agent that's willing to "re-package" a book in order to try to put it out on submission for a second round. He also reflects on how nothing can stop a determined writer.

 

Links of Interest:

• Denise Massar's Website
  • Denise on Instagram
• Mark's Kickstarter for ONE HAND SCREAMING: 20 Haunting Years
• EP 188 - A Gritty & Real Adoption and Publishing Journey with Denise Massar
• Mark's Stark Reflections on Writing & Publishing Newsletter (Signup)
• Cruising Writers
• Buy Mark a Coffee
• Patreon for Stark Reflections
  • How to Access Patreon RSS Feeds
• An Author's Guide to Working With Bookstores and Libraries
• The Relaxed Author
  • Buy eBook Direct
  • Buy Audiobook Direct
• Publishing Pitfalls for Authors
• An Author's Guide to Working with Libraries & Bookstores
• Wide for the Win
• Mark's Canadian Werewolf Books
  • This Time Around (Short Story)
  • A Canadian Werewolf in New York
  • Stowe Away (Novella)
  • Fear and Longing in Los Angeles
  • Fright Nights, Big City
  • Lover's Moon
  • Hex and the City
  • Only Monsters in the Building
• The Canadian Mounted: A Trivia Guide to Planes, Trains and Automobiles
• Yippee Ki-Yay Motherf*cker: A Trivia Guide to Die Hard

 

Denise Massar is a writer, an adoptee, and a mom via birth and adoption. Her essays have been published in HuffPost, Writer's Digest, Mutha Magazine, Raise Magazine, An Injustice!, and she’s a recurring guest blogger for Jane Friedman. Denise’s memoir, Matched, is about the nine months she spent obsessively searching for a baby to adopt, the nine potential birth moms she met on that journey, and how, in a twist of fate, her son’s birth mom led Denise to the one person she thought she’d never meet: The woman who gave birth to her. You can find Matched anywhere you buy books, and you can read the first ten pages right now, and get Denise’s Top Ten Memoir Recommendations on her website, http://www.denisemassar.org/

 

The introductory, end, and bumper music for this podcast (“Laser Groove”) was composed and produced by Kevin MacLeod of www.incompetech.com and is Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0