On this episode of the world famous Sofa King Podcast, we look get quantum and talk about one of the world’s greatest scientific organization, CERN. CERN, of course, is famous for their Large Hadron Collider and all the experiments and conspiracy theories that are associated with it (some of which are plausible, some of which are about as far out as they get).

CERN has been a major force of science in the world since the 1950s. When Europe was struggling to rebuild from WWII, the US had the wealth and luxury to invest in major scientific exploration, leaving the rest of the world behind. Twelve member nations pitched in money to compete and created the Swiss based CERN labs. They focused on particle and quantum physics, and in 1989, they even invented the software that makes the World Wide Web possible, so they could share their data with the world.

In 2010, their Large Hadron Collider went online. There are other particle colliders on the planet, but this was the largest ever built and was theorized to revolutionize science. And it did. They were able to stabilize antimatter for an amazing 15 minutes (the previous record was a sixth of a second), and they ultimately proved the existence of the elusive Higgs Boson. One of their goals, by the way, is to prove that other parallel universes exist!

But the fun stuff is the conspiracy theories. The more tame are ones that say the collider causes earthquakes. The theories build in strength and then claim that global warming is caused by the LHC and other colliders. Then, there the theories that the LHC is a Stargate or a portal to Hell. Many people suggest the dimension hopping theories of the Mandela Effect stem from CERN’s experiments. One theory—proposed by notable physicists—is that Nature and time itself is why the LHC has technical problems; waves of causality from the future are causing the device to fail, so certain discoveries aren’t made. This all involves a time traveling bird with a baguette. And, yes, that’s a real thing.

Finally, the web (which they invented) was abuzz in 2016 with video of a so-called human sacrifice on the grounds of CERN. What we know to be true is that people who had high level access to CERN property were in robes and at least acted out the stabbing of a woman in white. What we don’t know is why. So, if you like science, Quantum Physics, Europe in general, virgin sacrifice, and time travelling quantum birds, this is the podcast for you!

Ritual Sacrifice Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cBBvYdBeu8s

First Ever Website Posted by Cern in the 1980s: https://www.w3.org/History/19921103-hypertext/hypertext/WWW/TheProject.html