Soft Skills Engineering

Episode 460: Losing autonomy and I got skipped for a promotion even though I'm awesome


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In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions:

  1. I have managed a product for some months now. My previous manager split their team in to mini-teams of 2-3 people. They gave me a small team and plenty of autonomy to own the product and go crazy on it. I had the time of my life as the team lead. I learned a ton and was really developing management skills.

    My new manager is more hands-on. They want to do things my old manager left space for me to do, like project planning and quarterly planning. Now I feel micro managed when they get involved. I become territorial. It feels like he doesn’t recognize the independence of the mini team. I feel like I’m going backwards and and undoing all the management growth I’ve had, becoming just a software eng who should just keep their head down and work on a task.
    I don’t know what to do. How do I keep my independence and keep growing, but also get along with the new lead and learn from them in the process?

  2. I work as a senior engineer in a large team alongside a few other senior technical leaders. I’ve consistently received positive feedback from my manager about my impact — improving engineering quality, operational excellence, and team communication patterns.

    At the same time, there have been challenges in collaboration and teamwork between other senior leaders and the teams they work closely with.

    My manager has been highly supportive of the projects and changes I propose, and many improvements have been implemented based on my suggestions. However, during the recent promotion cycle, despite this positive feedback, I was not promoted, while another senior engineer — who is known to have collaboration challenges — was promoted instead.

    When I asked for feedback, I was told that while my contributions are appreciated and my time will come, they couldn’t explain the specific factors behind the promotion decision.

    I now feel a bit demotivated, as it seems engineering excellence and team impact may not be the primary factors considered for growth here.

    My question is: How should I think about my next steps? Should I keep investing in this team or start considering other opportunities?

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    Soft Skills EngineeringBy Jamison Dance and Dave Smith

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