This week, the Idiots discuss

00:00 Welcome!

00:44 Eclipse

07:45 Trans Visibility Day

24:10 Oregon Drug Use

31:41 Amazon Grocery Store

35:33 Viewer Comment

The breakdown: 

—Who knew we were still living in the dark ages, where an eclipse would send the dumbest of the dumb into a tizzy? Sure, they’re tracked, which means we know exactly when and where they’re going to happen, but they’re also A SIGN FROM GOD THAT AMERICA IS A SINFUL COUNTRY!

—Who is stupider, Marjorie “Jewish Space Lasers” Greene, or the people who support and vote for her? Serious question, because she is just beyond dumb. Before she threw a fit over the eclipse, conservative commentators wet their pants and cried their eyes out because Trans Visibility Day fell on Easter. Most notably, Caitlyn Jenner joined in the chorus of idiots blaming Joe Biden for “declaring” Easter was Trans Visibility Day.

—Oregon voted to decriminalize all drugs. How did that work out for them? Not well. Who saw it coming? EVERYBODY.

—Amazon was going to revolutionize grocery shopping. You’d walk into a store, grab what you wanted, and walk out. AI and modern technology would keep track of everything and charge your Amazon account, easy-peasy. No clerks, no fuss, no muss. Except it never worked, and now they’re pulling the plug. Turns out, the “technology” was basically a big call center in India, with poorly-paid workers hunched over computer screens, watching footage of shoppers. 

—We respond to a troll who likes Trump more than reality.

Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to.

Tune in and get your giggle on.

Find Jake at @jakevevera

Find nathan at nathantimmel.com