00:00 Introductions

0:150  Shamsud-Din Jabbar

14:38 DEI in Universities

21:50 Brad Spafford

28:41 Alfred Rava

—We begin with apologies. 

We know we’ve mentioned this several times over the past several weeks, but Jake and his family (wife, two kids, two dogs, cat) are moving. 

They just got to their new house, which means the first half of craziness has passed, but as we record, they’re in the second half of insane.

Things are in boxes, the kids are noisy… there’s a lot going on.

HOPEFULLY, next week, Jake will have all his audio issues taken care of.

Cross your fingers, and thanks for your patience.

—Is there a bigger douchebag out there right now than Shamsud-Din Jabbar?

Sure, historically, there are bigger losers, but at the moment, this guy is the absolute worst. Thrice divorced, failed businesses, and does he look in the mirror and pick the common denominator, him?

Nope!

He lashes out at the world around him.

Ugh.

Makes me wish I believed in hell, so I could find peace in the knowledge he’s down there right now, waiting for Trump and his ilk.

We also discuss (and praise) Master Sergeant Matthew Alan Livelsberger, who took himself out in Vegas. He didn’t go on a rampage, and target innocent people, he ended his problems the right way, but removing himself from the game.

Good on ya, Master Sergeant. 

—The University of Iowa is dialing back its DEI courses.

That’s a win for conservatives, right?

Well, not really.

So…

“Oh, no one is interested in this? Yeah, cut the program.”

—Speaking of douchebags… Brad Spafford has a lawyer, and that lawyer is a big one.

Brad Spafford seems to have issues. 

He has a hobby of making bombs.

Lots and lots of them.

And I’m not talking about movies that don’t make back their budget.

The FBI found out about him, arrested him, and a lawyer is arguing for his release into society.

Dude is the biggest walking red flag you’ve ever seen, and a lawyer wants him walking around unfettered. 

Yay.

 —Speaking of douchebag lawyers, Alfred Rava appears to be an enormous one. 

He files lawsuits for incels against businesses that dare to offer a “ladies night,” in order to attract customers.

Apparently the weakest, most pathetic man-boys on the planet are threatened by women getting a dollar off the drink you’re probably going to buy for them anyway, and think it should be illegal. 

Why?

Because when women go to a bar, men go to a bar. 

They go to a bar and talk to women.

But not man-boy incels. 

No, they’re afraid of women, so instead of allowing normal men to enjoy a night at a bar full of women, they sue. 

And Alfred Rava takes the case.

Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to.

Tune in and get your giggle on.

Find Jake at @jakevevera

Find nathan at nathantimmel.com

00:00 Introductions

01:53 Blake Lively

12:40 Donald Trump Trolls Denmark

17:33 Matt Gaetz

23:48 Dumb Voters

32:15 The Death Penalty

—Happy New Year!

Up front, we berate all the podcasts who are on vacation and running old episodes. 

They’re all lazy, and not worth listening to. 

We also quickly touch upon unsung hero Luigi Mangione, who was arrested in the McDonald’s where Amy Vevera worked as a teenager.

(For the record, Amy wouldn’t have snitched.)

—nathan cannot explain why he’s so interested in this story, but he is. 

Hollywood is an interesting animal, with publicists creating narratives that seemingly have nothing to do with reality.

Man-bun douchenozzle Justin Baldoni apparently went after Blake Lively over the summer, and she just hit back, hard.

With behind-the-scene texts and messages, it looks like she’s going to do to Justin what Dominion did to Fox News.

—Come hell or high water, the United States will own Greenland! And the Panama Canal!

Not really, but it’s funny (sad) that whenever Trump so obviously trolls, the media falls for it.

And, not just the media, Denmark has upped defense spending to shore up Greenland.

A side discussion involves nathan’s travels to Japan, and Guam, and his visits to businesses of ill repute. 

—Talk about luck…

The House Ethics Committee released the damning report on Matt Gaetz, and he is offended.

(Or, at least one teenage girl.)

But, hey: don’t compare him to an Uber driver, because that would be unfair to the Uber driver.

(They’re kind, upstanding citizens. Unlike Gaetz.)

Also: why don’t Matt Gaetz and Hunter Biden have their own reality TV show? Give ‘em both money and drugs, and let them do what they do.

Eff the Kardashians, I’d watch the Gaetz/Biden show all day long.

—A couple weeks ago, really dumb Union Steelworkers were upset, because they supported Trump in the election, but then Trump said he wouldn’t support a merger that would protect steelworker jobs.

Now, NYC Firefighters, who for years have watched Republicans fight healthcare benefits for 9/11 workers, are shocked and upset that Republicans stripped benefits from the latest budget bill.

Look, there’s nothing wrong with voting Republican, just know exactly whey you’re doing it: you don’t care about anyone but yourself, and you’re rich.

That’s it.

Maybe you hate the LGBTQ community, sure, but if you’re middle or working class, and you think voting Republican will help you?

Well, it’s sad/funny that reality is now biting you in the butt.

Also: is college important? 

Republicans say, “No!” unless it’s their kids going.

And foreign workers with good degrees.

Then, “Yes.”

Hypocrisy?

Of course!

The foundation of the Republican Party.

—Speaking of hypocrisy…

Joe Biden removed 37 of the 40 criminals on Death Row (federal prison), because the death penalty is bad.

Oh, but he left the 3 fellas on, because what they did was REALLY bad.

And by that, I mean, “political reasons.”

Because ethics and morals have nothing to do with politics, which is the only reason anything gets done in Washington.

Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to.

Tune in and get your giggle on.

Find Jake at @jakevevera

Find nathan at nathantimmel.com

00:00 Introductions

02:34 Florida

12:29 Elon Musk

23:16 NCAA

33:53 Hawk Tuah

—In the intro, we apologize for the audio problems YouTube was having during our livecast. Sadly, there’s nothing we can do when YouTube glitches. 

We also discuss Jake getting drunk and watching the Detroit Lions pound the crap out of the Chicago Bears.

—The number one adult website in the world has put Florida on notice. 

Well, adult websites think their idiotic, “Click here if you’re over 18” is enough protection to prevent kids from seeing adult content, and Florida thinks you should have to scan a government issued ID in order to access certain websites.

Both sides are wrong, and we make fun of the topic as a whole.

—Far-too-liberal Huffpost ran an idiotic article saying Elon Musk posted “racist” images of Elizabeth Warren.

Did he?

He posted images, sure, but to immediately jump to “racism?”

Like Fox News is an echo chamber for stupid people, Huffpost is an echo chamber for crybabies. 

Anyway, Elizabeth Warren said she had Native American ancestry for years, and Elon simply made fun of her for it.

Big whoop.

A side discussion involves the DNC, and there propensity to help the candidates they like, vs. the candidates the general public wants to elect.

—NCAA president Charlie Baker testified before Congress, and it was a poop-show.

He wanted to talk about the twin problems of gambling (as it relates to college sports/athletes), and harassment of female athletes.

What did Republicans want to yell about?

TRANS ATHLETES!

Complete a-hole Josh Hawley made certain of two things:

One, he would get his idiotic soundbites on the air.

Two, the facts wouldn’t get told.

Watching a congressional hearing is fascinating, because what happens live vs. what the media shows is two different things.

Narratives are spun, and stupid people remain angry over stupid things.

—Speaking of stupid people, did Haliey Welch pull a fast one on the dumbest of the dumb?

She put out her own cryptocurrency.

It shot up in value, and then immediately collapsed.

The creators got rich; the general public lost money.

Is it a conspiracy?

Is it stupid money buying crypto from someone made famous for a quick quote on a viral video?

Should federal investigators be involved?

All these questions and more, answered.

Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to.

Tune in and get your giggle on.

Find Jake at @jakevevera

Find nathan at nathantimmel.com

#new #trans #politics

00:00 Introductions

00:56 Corporate Comedy

06:24 Young Love

14:01 Nancy Parker

22:04 Hoax

25:33 Jersey Drones

30:02 Alex Jones

34:17 Sophie Rain

—nathan had a corporate show the other night. How did it go? Let’s listen in…

We also discuss the fact Jake is moving.

—Right off the bat, we jump into viewer comments. A 19-year-old kid wants to know if he should marry his girlfriend.

Do teenage marriages work?

Generally, no.

But, miracles do happen.

—Is Nancy Parker the worst person on the planet?

But, still.

Why?

And heroes. 

—Sometimes, things are too good to be true, and that’s the case here. nathan found a hilarious tweet by “YesMadam,” a company that said it laid off a slew of workers…

But, sadly, it turned out to be a hoax.

—We jump into the comments to discuss the drones over New Jersey, Frank Stallone, and aliens.

—Living proof that there is no God, Alex Jones got a win in court this week.

While The Onion should get all rights to Infowars, a judge allowed a sham nutrition company paired with Jones to sue and put the bid on hold.

Jake explains why, and it makes sense, sadly, but still…

—Sophie Rain is a Christian.

Which, naturally makes her a hypocrite. 

She’s an OnlyFans millionaire, but it’s OK, because God is very forgiving.

To be fair, no one should think anything involving consenting adults is a sin.

Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to.

Tune in and get your giggle on.

Find Jake at @jakevevera

Find nathan at nathantimmel.com

00:00 Introductions

01:29 United Health CEO

03:33 We Are 100

06:04 Hawk Tuah

17:40 KISS

27:56 Jason Zugai

32:48 Mitch McConnell 

33:14 Hunter Biden

—Anthony Eugenio joins the idiots.

—It was all the rage last week, but we really don’t spend a lot of time covering the death of Brian Thompson.

We do find it incredibly amusing that Internet Slueths, who ALWAYS find the identity of mysterious (or, more often than not, racist) people (Karens) online, are taking a pass on hunting down the hero who put a CEO in his forever box.

—How dumb is Nathan?

Very dumb.

He had to be reminded that he wrote a book about vigilantes who took out horrible people, and that book literally opens with someone blowing up a group of healthcare executives.

Life imitating art…

If only I could get a modicum of attention for being ahead of the curve.

—Jake is in love with Hailey Welch.

nathan is decidedly agnostic, with a slight lean to the negative. 

And for the love of God, why would anyone by crypto from her?

Apparently people lost thousands of dollars, and they couldn’t have deserved it more.

Gambling on crypto is dumb enough. 

Doing so because of an influencer?

Beyond dumb.

Also: Jake wants you to watch the documentary, “Sour Grapes.”

—You wanted the best, you got the best, the hottest band in the world, KISS…

…is being sued by a former employee. 

Specifically, their wig handler. 

David Matthews has worked for KISS since 1992, and according to the lawsuit, put in 12 to 15 hour days.

Question: doing what?

He was their wig wrangler. That should be 15 minutes of a day, total.

Put wig on rockstar, poof it up.

Rockstar performs live, takes wig off, hands it to you. 

Apparently Matthews was worried about COVID protocols not being followed to the letter. 

I’m sure he has a lot of close friends and well-wishers.

People that whine incessantly usually do. 

—Is Jason Zugai the dumbest person on the planet? 

Well… maybe not dumbest, but he’s pretty close.

He’s a the VP of the United Steelworkers union. Because he’s dumb, he endorsed Trump. 

Now, Trump is opposed to a merger that would help the Steelworkers, and Zugai is upset.  

Oooh, you didn’t see this coming?

The guy who never paid his workers, not having the back of the working man?

You have to marvel at the stupidity.

—Sometimes, I wish I was a Christian. 

And then I’d feel comfort in knowing that Mitch McConnell will burn for all eternity because of his evil ways.

Mitchy is upset, because two Democratic Federal Judges announced their retirement, then decided to stay on the bench after Trump won the election.

Mitchy thinks they’re hypocrites.

Mitch McConnell.

Mr. “We can’t appoint a Supreme Court judge in an election year when Obama is president, but can absolutely appoint one as Trump is leaving office.”

—Joe Biden pardoned his son, Hunter.

nathan understands why, but thinks it was a dumb, awful move.

Jake is more forgiving.

Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to.

Tune in and get your giggle on.

Find Jake at @jakevevera

Find nathan at nathantimmel.com

00:00 Introductions

01:33 Kamala Harris

05:21 Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez

11:20 Elon Musk

20:30 Baldvin Oddson

25:53 Rudy Giuliani

28:44 Donald Trump

33:30 Harry & Megan

—It’s a dead heat! Kamala is ahead! It’s tight!

All lies. 

According to new information, internal polling by the Harris campaign showed them perpetually behind Trump.

The whole time.

But, gotta get those donations, so you can’t tell the public that.

Even better, a list of potential Democratic candidates for 2028 has…

*drum roll*

Kamala listed first.

Oh, DNC… is there any way you won’t try shooting yourself in the foot?

—AOC removed her pronouns from her Twitter bio.

This is a solid move, and me like.

The idea that everyone should announce who they are at every moment of every day is just absurd. 

Even though Democrats didn’t run on a progressive agenda, they were saddled with the blue-haired land whale label by the right, and it stuck.

If AOC, a founding member of the Squad can see the light, maybe there’s hope for the future.

A quick side discussion involves a discussion of Black Lives Matter signs being taken down from storefronts. 

—Elon Musk put Ben Stiller on blast!

Or, so the headlines say. 

In reality, it’s just a Tweet.

A side discussion involves social media censorship, and how to get around the horrible, horrible algorithms TikTok and YouTube use to silence people, and stifle self-expression. 

—CEO Baldvin Oddson fired 90% of his staff for missing a meeting!

That’s what the headline screamed.

What’s the real story behind the clickbait?

They were mostly unpaid interns working for an online instrument store.

This ain’t Fortune 500 corporate evil, it’s nonsense.

—Rudy Giuliani is broke.

He hitched his wagon to an evil horse, told lies, and got caught.

It’s a good day when bad things happen to deserving people.

—Good news, everyone…

Donald Trump is going to let the world know just how bad fentanyl is.

How?

He’s invented the “Just say no” campaign, 40 years after it first appeared, and failed.

Trump plans on taking out ads, telling people that fentanyl is a bad drug.

Well, good for him.

Hopefully his campaign makes the world a better place.

—The world’s most annoying royal couple, Prince Harry and the Duchess of Sussex, Megan (Meghan?) Markle are back. 

After failing with their podcast and… well, pretty much everything else they’ve done, they’re now exec producing a show on Netflix that revolves around everyone’s favorite sport: polo.

And, even though they once renounced their royal titles, funnily enough, they’re still using fancy names in the show credits.

How odd.

Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to.

Tune in and get your giggle on.

Find Jake at @jakevevera

Find nathan at nathantimmel.com

#news #comedy #funny

00:00 Introductions

01:35 Unalived by Dog Pills

05:25 Alex Jones

11:18 Election 2024

16:31 Conceptual Art

20:33 Spotify

23:46 Matt Gaetz

27:09 Mike Johnson

28:32 Trans Issues

—Have you ever overdosed on a dog medication? Jake has, because he likes to live life to the fullest.

It’s also the title of his newest (first) comedy special, and we give it a little promo here.

—Alex Jones finally got what he deserved when the Sandy Hook families won a $1.5 billion settlement against him.

His assets are being sold off, and in a move inspired by God, The Onion bought Infowars. 

But, because the worst of humanity doesn’t go gentle into that good night, Alex is suing the Sandy Hook families, and his supplements company is filing to have the sale overturned.

Hopefully these lawsuits turn out the way they should, and everyone involved with Alex and his anti-human ways gets an incurable disease and suffer a painful, prolonged demise. 

—Kamala lost, but was it a mandate? 

As the votes continue to be tallied, it’s closer than ever. What looked like a rout is actually, while still a victory, only occurred with a popular vote difference of 2,000,000 people.

We’re a divided country, and 70+ million are either ill-informed, hateful, or stupid. 

I’m not sure that says good things about us.

That said, Kamala spent money like an idiot, and made some really dumb, repeat-of-what-Hillary-did-in-2016 mistakes.

Dumb. 

—An idiot duct tapes a banana to a wall, and someone pays $6.5 million for it.

What a time to be alive.

—We discussed this last week (or, recently, at least), but Spotify doesn’t pay artists anything. Lilly Allen makes more taking pictures of her feet for Only Fans than she does for streaming her songs.

We ramble down a tangent of streaming services, musicians, Napster, and Metallica.

—Matt Gaetz was up for Attorney General, and then dropped out. Now, he’s on Cameo, with George Santos. 

Why did Matt drop out?

Because he’s (most likely) a criminal, and a pervert, and a pedo.

A congressional report on his after-hours activities was about to expose what everyone knows, but what the worst of the worst people choose to ignore: that he paid underage girls to sleep with them.

That is both (a) illegal, and (b) creepy and wrong.

Your Republican Party, ladies and gentlemen. 

Tangent: Spotify, Sirius/XM, and Pandora all treat comedians worse than musicians. 

Ask me how I know. 

—Religious hypocrisy is an interesting thing.

We offer a small quiz asking why.

—Last week, we stumbled our way through a conversation about transgender kids. Jake had a thought, and a listener countered that thought with an article.

Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to.

Tune in and get your giggle on.

Find Jake at @jakevevera

Find nathan at nathantimmel.com

00:00 Introductions

00:00 Introductions

01:15 Mike Tyson 

08:07 Georgia

09:52 Michigan Muslims

15:13 Viewer Comments

20:24 Feeding the Troll 

22:27 Kamala & Trans Issues

25:18 The Onion Buys Infowars 

28:38 Viewer Comments

31:51 Chat GPJ

—It’s our 600th episode, huzzah!

—Well, we didn’t get the knockout we al wanted, nor did we (apparently) get much of a boxing match. 

Jake (or Logan) Paul was kind to Tyson, and didn’t clock him. 

It really was a lose-lose situation for Paul; either he loses to Tyson, and is a joke, or he beats Tyson up, and is cruel.

But in the end, youthful vigor prevailed.

(As did size, and reach.)

—Ya gotta be careful when it comes to headlines.

Which I took to mean, Georgia, the Peach state.

Nope!

The country next to Russia!

Oops.

Always click the article and get the information; snap judgments are no bueno.

—Dearborn, Michigan, has the largest Muslim population in the United States, and they helped swing the mitten state to Trump.

They voted overwhelmingly for Trump, and in second place was Jill Stein.

Why?

Because Biden/Kamala didn’t do enough to keep Israel out of Gaza.

Well, now those really smart people are waking up to the reality anyone with an IQ higher than that of a potato(e) saw coming miles away: Trump is 100% all in on Israel. 

Well done, dummies!

Gaza is about to become a parking lot.

Enjoy.

—We jump into our YouTube Livestream to read viewer comments. 

—We have a troll, and we’re not sure if he’s just having fun leaving stupid comments, or if he’s genuinely the dumbest person on the planet.

Here, we discuss one of his many dumb posts on our podcast.

—A commenter brought up the fact Kamala said something dumb, once. 

It’s odd that she had to be perfect, while Trump could be garbage. 

Such a high standard, to set for one, with the opposite, low expectations for the other.

Should trans prisoners be given gender reassignment surgery?

Who cares?

Thanks, dumb people.

—Oh what a beautiful morning… Oh what a beautiful day…

In a rare moment of good news, Alex Jones, who deservedly lost everything because he’s a horrible human being, had to sell Infowars.

The purchaser?

The satirical newspaper plans to use the site to mock all things conspiracy theory, which means all things Alex Jones.

Good riddance to bad rubbish.

Side note: speaking of bad rubbish, Lauren Boebert took to Congress to talk about UFOs, and aliens building underwater cities in the ocean.

Great job, Colorado. 

You know how to elect ‘em.

—We’re back to trans issues for a bit.

—There is now an app where you can chat with Jesus. 

A ChatGPT powered app simulates the responses Jesus would give if asked a question.

Is it hilarious?

Evil?

Well intentioned?

Who knows… Too early to tell, but we can’t wait to find out.

Idiots on Parade: we mock the news, so you don’t have to.

Tune in and get your giggle on.

Find Jake at @jakevevera

Find nathan at nathantimmel.com

Mistakes were made, and they were all made by Zoom.

Zoom: Sometimes We Work!