In this solo episode of I'm diving into the book When Religion Hurts You by Laura E. Anderson. This book explores the psychological effects of high-control religious environments and offers insights into healing from religious trauma. Inspired by my own deconstruction journey, I unpack key concepts from the book, including the nervous system’s response to fear, different types of grief, and the challenge of rebuilding self-trust. I also share personal stories of how religious trauma shaped my experiences growing up and how I'm learning to set healthier boundaries. Whether you’re currently deconstructing or just curious about the mental health impact of religion, this episode is packed with insights.

Key Takeaways

• Understanding Trauma Responses – The fight, flight, freeze, and fawn responses, and how high-control religions keep people in a state of constant fear.
• Grieving Life After Religion – The different types of grief that come with leaving faith, including lost community, altered worldviews, and shifts in self-identity.
• Rebuilding Self-Trust & Compassion – How religious environments discourage self-trust and how we can reframe our internal dialogue.
• Setting Healthy Boundaries – Moving from rigid, externally imposed boundaries to self-defined, evolving ones.
• The Good in Religion – Recognizing that not everything about faith was harmful, and processing the loss of positive aspects like community and structure.

Timestamps

00:00 Introduction and Solo Episode Announcement

00:26 Book Introduction: When Religion Hurts You

00:41 Newsletter Launch Announcement

01:29 Impactful Insights from the Book

03:14 Understanding the Nervous System

04:51 Personal Experiences with Religious Trauma

09:06 Grieving the Life You Once Had

18:22 Different Types of Grief

19:35 Grieving Childhood and Adolescence

24:37 Grieving Our View of Others and the World

26:06 Recognizing the Pull Away from God

27:05 Grieving the Good in Religion

30:00 Trust and Vulnerability Post-Religion

32:23 Building Self-Trust and Compassion

42:55 Redefining Boundaries

45:54 Final Thoughts and Encouragement

Resources Mentioned

• When Religion Hurts You by Laura E. Anderson
• Brene Brown’s The Anatomy of Trust (Super Soul Sessions)

If this episode resonated with you, let’s keep the conversation going!
📩 Sign up for my newsletter for podcast updates & book recommendations – https://exhsclub.beehiiv.com/subscribe
📌 Follow Ex-Homeschoolers Club on social media (@EXHSClub everywhere)
⭐ Leave a 5-star review on your podcast platform – it helps others find the show!
📧 Share your thoughts or your own story at [email protected]

Real stories. Real conversations. If you want the latest episodes of the Ex-Homeschoolers Club podcast, plus bonus insights and community highlights, sign up for the newsletter.

https://exhsclub.beehiiv.com/subscribe

In this episode of The Ex-Homeschoolers Club, I sit down with my longtime friend, Aaron MacDonald, to talk about his homeschool experience, the unique quirks of growing up in a religious homeschooling community, and how it shaped his perspective on life, art, and relationships. We dive deep into topics like group learning, purity culture, and navigating personal growth beyond the homeschool bubble. Aaron also shares insights into his artistic journey, how he overcame self-doubt, and the unconventional ways he connects with his creativity.

Key Takeaways

• Homeschooling & Socialization – How co-ops like Group Solutions impacted our childhood and social skills.
• Religious Influence – The role faith played in our upbringing and how it shaped our views on relationships, sex, and adulthood.
• Purity Culture & Dating – Breaking down the "purity ring" experience and unlearning unhealthy narratives about sex.
• Self-Discovery & Healing – Aaron’s powerful method of visualizing younger versions of himself to work through personal growth.
• The Artistic Journey – Aaron's evolution as an artist, his preferred mediums, and how he now teaches art to others.

Resources Mentioned

• Aaron's artwork on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aaronmacdnldart/
• Books on art & creativity from the Bauhaus School
• I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris (discussed critically)

Timestamps

00:00 Introduction and Welcome

00:57 Introducing Aaron MacDonald

01:46 Aaron's Homeschool Journey

04:30 Homeschool Curriculum and Methods

08:07 Group Solutions and Social Aspects

14:53 Religion and Homeschooling

21:27 Dating and Purity Culture

28:13 Sexuality and Cultural Impacts

33:54 Healing the Internal Voice

34:55 Meeting the Expert

35:55 Challenging Childhood Beliefs

38:26 Therapy and Self-Reflection

50:40 Artistic Journey

01:02:51 Memorable Homeschool Experiences

01:06:42 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Enjoyed this episode? Make sure to:
✅ Subscribe to The Ex-Homeschoolers Club on your favorite podcast app.
✅ Leave a review – it helps others find the show!

✅Email me at:[email protected]
✅ Join the discussion on Reddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/exhomeschoolersclub/
✅ Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/exhsclub/
✅ Sign up for the newsletter:https://exhsclub.beehiiv.com/subscribe

I'm always striving to make this show better and I want to hear from you. If you've got a few minutes, would you mind answering a few questions? ⁠https://exhsclub.beehiiv.com/forms/ecd981ec-ed4e-4b22-a15d-ae3b2858c757⁠

On this weeks Ex-Homeschoolers Club, we welcome Ruth Brooks, a former homeschooler turned homeschool mom of four, to explore her unique educational journey. From hiding from truant officers in the early days of homeschooling to navigating modern resources, Ruth shares how her experiences shaped her homeschooling style, including how she balanced structure and flexibility, adapted to her children’s unique learning needs, and handled the transition from teaching to rediscovering herself. They discuss navigating curriculum challenges, managing large families, and fostering emotional health in both parents and children. This episode is packed with insights for parents, homeschoolers, and those curious about the homeschool experience.

WE ARE LAUNCHING A BOOK CLUB!!!

That's right the Ex-Homeschoolers Book Club is going live.

Our first book is going to be “When Religion Hurts You” by Dr. Laura E Anderson

Link to our Fable Book Club: https://fable.co/club/ex-homeschoolers-book-club-with-jacob-gooden-585330795145?invite=d05c4720-2e57-471a-ad97-dfe8a5026688

Grab your copy of “When Religion Hurts You”: https://drlauraeanderson.com/book

#exhomeschoolersbookclub #exhomeschooler #homeschool #whenreligionhurts #whenreligionhurtsyou #bookclub 

I'm always striving to make this show better and I want to hear from you. If you've got a few minutes, would you mind answering a few questions? https://exhsclub.beehiiv.com/forms/ecd981ec-ed4e-4b22-a15d-ae3b2858c757

In this episode of the Ex-Homeschoolers Club, host Jacob Gooden welcomes special guest Liz, a homeschool graduate from the 80s and 90s. Together, they delve into the unique experiences of homeschooling across decades, highlighting their differences and surprising commonalities. Liz shares her journey as a "Marine brat" growing up in a conservative Catholic homeschool setting, the challenges of isolation, and the unique dynamics of her family’s educational decisions. The conversation also touches on the cultural shifts in homeschooling, adapting to college life, and the lasting impact of homeschooling on personal and professional growth. This heartfelt discussion sheds light on the strength, adaptability, and camaraderie of the ex-homeschooler community.

Key Takeaways:

The contrasting experiences of homeschooling in the 80s/90s versus the 2000s, including societal perceptions and available resources.

Navigating isolation and limited social interactions in a homeschool setting and the long-term effects on personal development.

The shift in homeschooling acceptance and normalization in the late 90s and early 2000s.

Adapting to college life as a former homeschooler, including cultural catch-up and overcoming challenges.

Liz’s reflections on homeschooling’s mixed impact on her life, from moments of gratitude to lessons learned.

Timestamps

00:00 Introduction and Special Guest Announcement01:18 Liz's Homeschooling Journey Begins04:20 Challenges and Isolation in Homeschooling07:56 Social Dynamics and Homeschool Groups12:10 Adapting to College Life16:41 Reflections on Homeschooling and College Experience28:12 Holiday Breaks and Realizations29:22 Navigating Pop Culture as a Homeschooler30:32 Cultural Catch-Up and Masking38:06 Homeschooling Stereotypes and Realities42:38 Homeschooling in Different Cultures48:08 Mixed Experiences and Reflections56:07 The Impact of 2020 and Homeschooling59:39 Final Thoughts and Encouragement

Resources Mentioned:

I Heart the 80s and I Heart the 90s (VH1 shows)

Catholic Youth Organization (CYO)

Turner Classic Movies and AMC (classic programming staples)

Enjoyed this episode? Subscribe to the Ex-Homeschoolers Club podcast, leave a review, and share it with a friend! You can also connect with Jacob on Instagram @EXHSClub or email at [email protected] to share your own homeschool story or suggest topics for future episodes.

I'm always striving to make this show better and I want to hear from you. If you've got a few minutes, would you mind answering a few questions? https://exhsclub.beehiiv.com/forms/ecd981ec-ed4e-4b22-a15d-ae3b2858c757

Hey everyone! In this episode of the Ex-Homeschoolers Club, I sit down with Whitney Brim-DeForest, a former homeschooler with an incredible journey. Whitney’s story is a mix of unique experiences, from an unconventional homeschool structure to finding her calling as a plant scientist. We discuss the ups and downs of her homeschooling years, the challenges of reintegrating into public school, and how a passion for science blossomed from her eclectic upbringing. Along the way, we dive into the cultural gaps she experienced, the mentors who shaped her, and how her homeschooling days influenced her parenting philosophy today. If you’ve ever wondered how homeschooling shapes independence and self-direction, you’ll love this episode!

Key Takeaways:

• Whitney’s homeschooling journey featured Saxon Math alongside experiential learning in arts, history, and hands-on activities.
• How periodic public school stints and a lack of peer consistency impacted her social development.
• The discovery of pop culture, music, and friendships after homeschooling.
• A transformative high school physics teacher and how mentors can inspire career paths.
• Whitney’s choice not to homeschool her kids and the value of diverse opportunities for children.

Timestamps:

00:00 Introduction to the Ex Homeschoolers Club

00:33 Whitney's Unique Homeschooling Journey

02:24 The Challenges of Socialization

03:27 Homeschool Curriculum and Learning Styles

07:03 Transitioning to Public School

09:44 Finding Passion and Career Path

17:15 Religious Influences and Gender Roles

23:50 Navigating Pop Culture Post-Homeschooling

24:45 Early Tech Exposure and Music Sneaking

26:25 Musical Influences and High School Experience

28:04 College Life and Music Exploration

31:18 Peace Corps and Cultural Disconnect

31:55 Friendship Challenges and Socialization

38:13 Parenting Choices and Homeschool Reflections

43:48 Biggest Positives and Negatives of Homeschooling

46:44 Final Thoughts and Farewell

Resources Mentioned:

• Saxon Math curriculum
• "The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill" (album)
• Adventures in Odyssey audio series
• "Our Bodies, Ourselves" (book)

If you enjoyed this episode, please hit that subscribe button and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform—it helps more listeners find the show! Got a story to share? Email me at [email protected] to join the conversation. Let’s keep exploring the amazing and sometimes weird world of ex-homeschoolers together!

I'm always striving to make this show better and I want to hear from you. If you've got a few minutes, would you mind answering a few questions? https://exhsclub.beehiiv.com/forms/ecd981ec-ed4e-4b22-a15d-ae3b2858c757

Join me as I sit down with long-time friend and fellow Ojai Valley homeschooler, Alouette Pettit (Kim). From her unique homeschooling journey to her transition into a nursing career and now as a new mother, Alouette shares insightful reflections and hard-won lessons. Listen as they discuss the joys and challenges of homeschooling, the impact of mental health struggles, and the value of support systems in personal growth. Whether you're a homeschooler, parent, or someone navigating life’s unpredictable turns, this episode is packed with relatable and empowering moments.

Key Takeaways:

• Homeschooling Experiences: Alouette’s journey as a K-12 homeschooler and how it shaped her educational and social outlook.
• Navigating Mental Health: Overcoming anxiety, depression, and suicidal ideation with the help of cognitive-behavioral therapy.
• Professional Path: Transitioning from a science-loving homeschooler to a successful nursing career and educator.
• Parenting Reflections: Considering homeschooling for her daughter while balancing career and family.
• Building Resilience: The importance of community, communication, and seeking help when facing life’s challenges.

Timestamps

00:00 Introduction and Guest Welcome

02:20 Alouette's Homeschool Journey

06:39 Navigating Social Circles in Homeschooling

13:08 Transitioning from Homeschool to College

25:55 Choosing a Career in Nursing

29:34 Balancing Career and Family Life

31:55 Considering Homeschooling for the Next Generation

34:50 Setting Goals and Flexibility

35:14 Homeschooling Reflections

37:32 Mental Health Struggles

44:29 Therapy and Recovery

01:00:48 Generational Trauma and Family Dynamics

01:07:26 Funny Homeschool Moments

01:10:08 Closing Thoughts and Reaching Out

Resources Mentioned:

• "The Well-Trained Mind" by Susan Wise Bauer

If you enjoyed this conversation, be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with a friend who might benefit from hearing this story. Follow Ex-Homeschoolers Club on Instagram and TikTok for updates, and send us a message – we’d love to hear from you!Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/exhsclub/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@exhsclubEmail me at [email protected]

I'm always striving to make this show better and I want to hear from you. If you've got a few minutes, would you mind answering a few questions? https://forms.gle/SCAWjZ3fo1L4CxCK9This week on The Ex Homeschoolers Club, I had the absolute pleasure of sitting down with my college friend Adam Gaus. Until recently, I had no idea Adam was also homeschooled! In our conversation, he shared his fascinating journey of splitting his education between public school and homeschool. We reminisced about our time in college, dove into his creative outlets like music, and explored how his unique upbringing shaped his critical thinking and parenting style. Adam’s story is a mix of heartfelt reflections, hilarious cringy moments, and valuable insights into the balance between education and life. Whether you’re a homeschool veteran or just curious about the lifestyle, this episode has something for everyone.Key Takeaways:• Adam’s hybrid education journey: 50% public school, 50% homeschool.• The role of community and church in shaping Adam’s homeschooling experience.• How homeschooling influenced Adam’s self-reliance and critical thinking skills.• Insights into parenting and navigating public schooling for Adam’s children.• Reflecting on the ups and downs of homeschool life, including hilarious cringy moments like metal band performances.Resources Mentioned:• Niche Knowledge and Nonsense Podcast hosted by Adam's wife, Bailey: https://linktr.ee/nknpodIf you enjoyed this conversation, be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with a friend who might benefit from hearing this story. Follow Ex-Homeschoolers Club on Instagram and TikTok for updates, and send us a message – we’d love to hear from you!Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/exhsclub/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@exhsclubEmail me at [email protected]

I'm always striving to make this show better and I want to hear from you. If you've got a few minutes, would you mind answering a few questions? https://forms.gle/SCAWjZ3fo1L4CxCK9In this deeply personal episode, I open up about my journey of faith, doubt, and discovery. Reflecting on the intersection of my Christian upbringing and homeschooling experience, I share the struggles I faced reconciling my beliefs with hard questions, and how I eventually found the courage to embrace agnosticism. This year-end reflection is my raw and heartfelt exploration of identity, community, and the ongoing search for truth. Themes include my childhood faith, deconstructing religion, and rebuilding community after stepping away from traditional beliefs.Key Takeaways:- The Foundation of Faith: Growing up in a devout Christian household shaped my early worldview.- Critical Turning Points: I wrestled with the Bible’s literal interpretations and observed inconsistencies within the church.- Community and Loss: Leaving church life brought challenges of isolation and rebuilding my sense of identity.- Deconstruction Journey: I moved from evangelical Christianity to agnosticism by questioning and exploring my beliefs.- Encouraging Open Dialogue: I now embrace curiosity and strive to foster respectful conversations about belief and doubt.Resources Mentioned- Dirty Rotten Church Kids: https://www.instagram.com/dirtyrottenchurchkids/?hl=en- Ear Biscuits Deconstruction: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1qbna6t1bzw&list=PLLxmqs8vQskUbE_KnXQhA2gXmEg5dVMp3- Ken Ham vs. Bill Nye: https://www.youtube.com/live/PPLRhVdNp5M?si=HC8GrldP_zzkYmWl - The New Evengelicals: https://www.thenewevangelicals.com/about/Timestamps00:00 Introduction and Year-End Reflections00:20 The Gooden Family December Episodes00:42 Sharing My Christian Journey01:36 Gratitude and Listener Engagement03:42 Nervousness and Vulnerability05:34 Early Christian Experiences11:05 Church Involvement and Music16:04 Transition to Reality Church27:25 College and Faith Challenges31:31 Reconciling Evolution and Faith32:01 Overwhelmed by Religious Commitments33:21 Questioning Biblical Literalism34:26 Exploring Different Perspectives36:40 Burnout and Leaving Church39:13 Deconstructing Faith49:59 Embracing Agnosticism53:21 Building a New Community59:10 Final Thoughts and Future PlansIf you enjoyed this conversation, be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with a friend who might benefit from hearing this story. Follow Ex-Homeschoolers Club on Instagram and TikTok for updates, and send us a message – we’d love to hear from you!Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/exhsclub/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@exhsclubEmail me at [email protected]

I'm always striving to make this show better and I want to hear from you. If you've got a few minutes, would you mind answering a few questions? https://forms.gle/SCAWjZ3fo1L4CxCK9

In this heartfelt episode of The Ex-Homeschoolers Club, I sit down with my dad, Keith Gooden, for an in-depth conversation about homeschooling, fatherhood, and personal growth. We reflect on his evolving role in my education, the pivotal moments that reshaped his involvement, and how challenges like a hip injury and a cancer diagnosis sparked his commitment to health and resilience. Together, we discuss the joys and trials of homeschooling, the importance of parental involvement, and the life lessons we’ve both learned along the way. Keywords: homeschooling, fatherhood, personal growth, family dynamics, education.Key Takeaways:- Homeschool Evolution: How Keith transitioned from a "hands-off" principal to an active teacher and advocate for homeschooling.- Parental Involvement: The value of fathers participating in their children’s education and extracurricular interests.- Resilience in Adversity: How health challenges reshaped Keith’s mindset and inspired a commitment to fitness and personal development.- Creative Education Methods: Incorporating history through movies, discussions of controversial books, and hands-on learning.- Building Strong Family Bonds: The role of shared activities like airsoft and home projects in strengthening relationships.If you enjoyed this conversation, be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with a friend who might benefit from hearing this story. Follow Ex-Homeschoolers Club on Instagram and TikTok for updates, and send us a message – we’d love to hear from you!Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/exhsclub/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@exhsclubEmail me at [email protected]