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How to cope with the comedown when you’ve moved overseas.

Not long after you’ve arrived in your new country, there comes a time when it suddenly hits you – ‘Oh, is that it? Now what?’ You feel quite down and flat and wonder if you’ve made a terrible mistake.

We all know that moving overseas is really exciting. It heralds great change, perhaps the hope of a better future and a better life. To most families it represents a new start in their lives both professionally and personally.

But many new expats are shocked that it isn't all happy days and paradise living and begin to second guess their decision.

It’s OK, this is a completely normal experience; and it can often hit harder after the holiday season, which is why I want to talk about it now.

Why does this come-down happen? And what can you do to get through this feeling? Yes, through is the word I mean, because it is a transient feeling; it will pass.

When it happens after you’ve moved, I call it the comedown, or the 6-month slump. And then we have the ‘expat blues’, which is a similar feeling, and is relevant to this time of year. See the links below for articles I’ve written about these.

So, listen to this episode to learn coping methods, and tips to help you get through it, and once you understand why this feeling happens, you’ll be better prepared to power on through!

• Get expat life support at every stage of your expat journey - from home to away and back again!  Join The Expatability Club: the one-stop-shop for everything expat. 
• Want independent advice about your move overseas? For a one-to-one chat, please check my calendar for dates and options here
• Read my article on The 6-month slump on ExpatChild.com
• Read my article on The Comedown on ExpatChild.com
• Read my article on The Expat Blues on ExpatChild.com
• Visit ExpatChild.com for more free information about expat life!
• Take a look at my Expatability site for more details on how I can support you with your move abroad

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Expect the Unexpected
Culture Shock
Expats and the Holiday Season

These three topic were planned for separate episodes, but life events meant it made sense to see if I could fit them all into one episode, just in time for the Holidays! I think I succeeded 🤪 

I wanted to talk about how strange and different, and sometimes upsetting these special holidays can be for expats living away from their home countries and families. 

And the reason these special, family-oriented dates feel so different and sometimes difficult is ultimately down to culture shock! 

As for the Expect the Unexpected bit? One of my favourite expat-mentoring mantras is 'Expect the Unexpected'. Some of the ‘unexpected’ is funny, some of it can be a bit frustrating, but we can usually steer ourselves through it all.
 
Sometimes, however, that unexpected is a complete and utter blind-sider that nothing could have prepared me for. 

What happened? Well, listen and find out... 

• Get expat life support at every stage of your expat journey - from home to away and back again!  Join The Expatability Club: the one-stop-shop for everything expat. 
• Want independent advice about your move overseas? For a one-to-one chat, please check my calendar for dates and options here
• Visit ExpatChild.com for more free information about expat life!
• Join my Expat Parents' Support Group on Facebook 
• Sign up to receive my Expat Newsletter to keep up to date and in the loop with everything I do

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Expat Guilt. The one topic guaranteed to fire some people up, the one topic that’s tormenting many of my readers, my groups, my tribe. The topic that gets the most attention, the most comments, the most bitterness, the most sadness and causes every shade of angst you can possibly imagine.

Expat guilt can ruin your life overseas as you’re so busy thinking of others that you can’t truly live your own life. But you're not alone - believe me! 

Discover what expat guilt is about, what it’s for, how it can help you see your life choices from another’s perspective, and most importantly, how to manage these heavy feelings. Find out how to deal with your family’s feelings and how to cope with your own. 

I’ll give you the tools to help you escape the trap of expat guilt and move forward to a happier life abroad without neglecting your family and friends back home.

Don't let expat guilt get in the way of the exciting life you deserve. You deserve to be happy in your life overseas!

• Get expat life support at every stage of your expat journey - from home to away and back again!  Join The Expatability Club: the one-stop-shop for everything expat. 
• Want independent advice about your move overseas? For a one-to-one chat, please check my calendar for dates and options here
• Find my special 'Erase Expat Guilt and Reclaim Your Life' master class here
• Read my article on Expat Guilt on ExpatChild.com
• Visit ExpatChild.com for more free information about expat life!
• Take a look at my Expatability site for more details

"Guilt is a useless feeling. It’s never enough to make you change direction - only enough to make you useless."
Daniel Nayeri

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The very worst part of expat life. The Dreaded Phone Call telling you of the death of a loved one back home.

And yes, this episode was prompted, and triggered, by the death of Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth 2nd, as it came less than a week after the funeral of our own family member.

That Dreaded Phone Call triggers a whole heap of thoughts and emotions, that pile on quicker than your brain can process. 

When you're living overseas and receive that call, the world feels huge and impassable, you feel small and out of control, and helpless. There is nothing you can do right now. It's beyond  overwhelming.

Watching the news as Her Majesty’s children and grandchildren rushed to go to Balmoral to say their goodbyes will resonate with all, expat or not and parallels something many expats have to deal with. 

Most of us don’t have a private plane to hail, or a helicopter standing by. And we don’t have staff to help with the kids, or get us to the airport or anything like that. Yet, even with all that help on hand for them, and being in the same country, they still weren’t able to make it to her bedside in time.

While our circumstances are wildly different, that journey is excruciating, regardless of your birth status. The journey will be burned into your memory yet blurred with pain as well. 

I try to share the pain with you while, as ever, giving you some tips to help lessen the load.

• Get expat life support at every stage of your expat journey - from home to away and back again!  Join The Expatability Club: the one-stop-shop for everything expat. 
• Want independent advice about your move overseas? For a one-to-one chat, please check my calendar for dates and options here
• Visit ExpatChild.com for more free information about expat life!

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Talking about reverse culture shock; the peculiar, alienating feeling you get when you move back home after living the expat life. 

And I do realise that I’ve not actually spoken about normal culture shock on this podcast yet (that’s a topic for the future!) but I wanted to get this one in now after the visiting home episode last month. Because a form of reverse culture shock can hit you even when you make a short visit to your home country after moving overseas. 

I’ll tell you what reverse culture shock is, how it shows itself and why it happens. And, of course, I’ll share tips on how to cope and work through any reverse culture shock symptoms.

You’ll also learn the first rule of Ex-Expat Club… !

“So, here you are
 too foreign for home
 too foreign for here.
 Never enough for both.”

~ Ijeoma Umebinyuo

• Get expat life support at every stage of your expat journey - from home to away and back again!  Join The Expatability Club: the one-stop-shop for everything expat. 
• Want independent advice about your move overseas? For a one-to-one chat, please check my calendar for dates and options here
• Visit ExpatChild.com for more free information about expat life!

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Visiting your home country, maybe for the first time since you moved overseas, and how to plan it so you don’t have a nervous breakdown or fall out with everyone!

For many expats this is the first opportunity you’ve had to visit your home country since the world turned upside down: since it shut down due to the COVID pandemic. Now the world is rebooting and you’re planning a visit to your home country – maybe for the first time since you moved abroad and will see your families and friends for the first time in about three years.

Sharing tips for success from seasoned expats.

• Get expat life support at every stage of your expat journey - from home to away and back again!  Join The Expatability Club: the one-stop-shop for everything expat. 
• Want independent advice about your move overseas? For a one-to-one chat, please check my calendar for dates and options here
• Visit ExpatChild.com for more free information about expat life!
• Take a look at my Expatability site for more details

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Starting season 2 of the Expatability Chat Podcast with an episode all about me! 

Giving you a little insight into me, my life and what I do. Plus an explanation of what Expatability is, what that word actually means. Yes, I should have explained all that when I first started my expat podcast back in 2020 but I forgot!

I also explain why I use the word ‘expat’ when it still upsets a lot of people – it will make sense when you listen, I promise.

And I reveal a couple of case studies that give you an idea of why I do what I do – which is, of course, supporting expat parents with their move and life overseas.

I’m here to help you live the expat life you dream about and deserve, with practical and sensible advice and information. Along with some sugar-free tips, no BS tips and tricks to help you on your way. 

If you’re planning a move abroad, or if you’re already living your expat life, or even if you’re planning a move back home, you’ve come to the right place! I offer you experienced insight, advice, and information so you and your kids can live your expat experience to the full.

There are so many layers to this expat life that you need to know about, but often you don’t know what you need to know! And that’s what I aim to help you with. Knowledge is power!

• Get expat life support at every stage of your expat journey - from home to away and back again!  Join The Expatability Club: the one-stop-shop for everything expat. 
• Want independent advice about your move overseas? For a one-to-one chat, please check my calendar for dates and options here
• Visit ExpatChild.com for more free information about expat life!
• Take a look at my Expatability site for more details, season 1 podcast episodes and ways you can work with me.

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How to help your expat teen cope with moving

A teenager is a young person in a transitional life phase – and you’re adding another transitional life phase on top of all this with the move abroad! This can be 'interesting'! Adolescence can be tricky at the best of times. However, if a teen is moved from their comfort zone and close friends without a lot of preparation and discussion, this stage of development can be more difficult to handle while in a strange place.

Learn why moving is hard for teens and how what age you move for the first time makes such a difference.

Discover what Expat Child Syndrome is, what to be aware of and how to prevent and manage it. Plus an insight into my views on the whole 'kids are resilient' belief.

• Get expat life support at every stage of your expat journey - from home to away and back again!  Join The Expatability Club: the one-stop-shop for everything expat. 
• To book a Power Hour call with me so we can dig deep into your plans, please check out my diary, here: Expat Espresso Hour

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For very young children, moving house can be very hard indeed. They have become accustomed to their home, their room, their friends and their routines and to leave all this can throw them into confusion.

Try to see life from a child’s-eye view. Without the benefit of years of life experience, with some extra imagination and knowing YOUR child’s foibles.

The world of a child is unexpectedly complex and the things they worry about are not always the things we might expect. Added to this, their understanding of time, distance and space is very limited, so the concept of moving to a new home, in another part of the world, for a defined period, can be totally alien. By being aware of this, you will be able to help them understand it all a little better.

It’s all basically down to recognising their child's eye view of life, communication, routines, and handing the some control in this big life-changing thing that's happening to them.

• Get expat life support at every stage of your expat journey - from home to away and back again!  Join The Expatability Club: the one-stop-shop for everything expat. 
• To book a Power Hour call with me so we can dig deep into your plans, please check out my diary, here: Expat Espresso Hour

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Moving abroad with children; what to expect, how to prepare them and how to support them.

When I started writing ExpatChild.com back in 2012 there wasn’t much information on moving overseas with kids. As I wanted a kind of guidebook to relocating with children, I decided to write one myself!

This episode will be the start of a kind of series about this very topic: how to help your children have a smooth move into expat life.

We all want the best for our children, and we all want them to experience the easiest possible transition, so in this episode I’ll start by sharing just a few of the amazing benefits your expat child can gain. You’re setting your child up to become a well-rounded, globally relevant and internationally aware adult. 

Then I’ll talk about timing: what is the best age to make the move abroad with your children? Is there a ‘best age’? And I’ll explain how different age groups cope and adapt. And also, the time of year can have an effect on how swiftly your child will adapt to their new expat life, so that’s something to consider too.

• Get expat life support at every stage of your expat journey - from home to away and back again!  Join The Expatability Club: the one-stop-shop for everything expat. 
• Want independent advice about your move overseas? For a one-to-one chat, please check my calendar for dates and options here

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