I honestly don’t know what to make of this. Is Google getting paid to do experiments on me or is Scientology just positioning spies inside there as well?

Before I was an adult being covertly persecuted for writing absurdist humor about a totalitarian church and a high profile rape suspect, I was a middle-schooler being chided by adults for responding to mockery from privileged kids, with insults that were better written than theirs.

So now, it makes sense that downtown theater artists are getting incentive to try to make me falsely appear unprofessional for responding gracefully yet firmly to their pre-meditated psychological warfare campaign-a tired narrative that my haters are ready and resigned to accept.

In this episode we discuss one of many instances suggesting foul play from a director who befriended me and referenced phrases that I used in private zoom calls with my therapist as a form of psychological warfare. The math is simple. I need directors and a literary agent who knows how to generate more currency working with me than Scientology, or Kargman and Brooks/Kaplan families can ever give them to work against me.

Are you alone right now? Aren’t we all? Except for me because I’m being targeted by a multi-interest black-ops. “Forget it, Jake, It’s Chinatown.” Except low key don’t forget it, Jake, because I got stalked to Chinatown by a lady who was probably being coached by a person in a van to create the illusion that I have been cursed and it’s not Scientology harassing me at all. I only wanted to save money on bento boxes for the week.

Correct me if I’m wrong but this is just what I think Noelle wanted.

The CIA or Scientology is curating crappy knock offs of Jose Rivera short films to cast me in so that my art looks like shit, and the fact that you refuse to believe shows just how much of a jealous, victim blaming hater you really are.

Perhaps someone put broken glass under the accompanists tire that morning, or offered them a hefty incentive to not make it on time-perhaps the spy handler conducting my black ops even instructed me to podcast about this incident so that the accompanist can counter with some harrowing experience in order to make me sound like an insensitive diva for telling this story. Someone would have to be very powerful to interfere with an audition like this.

Be Your Own Pyramid Scheme.

I do miss my lack of interiority and might bring it back. I also feel like when Elon Musk creates an app for our thoughts to be directly broadcasted to individual Twitter accounts via microchips, that might push me back into Scientology. Remember kids—diversity is a principle of environmental science, and not just a favor you do for your neighbor.