In this episode of Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery, I sit down with Gina Birkemeier, LPC, author of Generations Deep: Unmasking Inherited Trauma and Dysfunction to Rewrite Our Stories Through Faith and Therapy.

We dive into how inherited family patterns, secrets, and shame drive both addiction and family dysfunction. Gina shares how families can recognize when they are operating out of trauma, how to move from rigid "hiding" to active "healing," and why family members must prioritize their own recovery journey, not just focus on their loved one in active addiction.

🎧 Follow or subscribe to Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery for more conversations about addiction and family recovery.

⭐ Leave a review and share this episode with someone who may benefit from it.

About Gina Birkemeier

Gina Birkemeier, LPC, is a licensed professional counselor, author, speaker, and founder of My Outloud Voice. With a dual background in theology and psychology, she teaches therapists and facilitates groups internationally, including in Guatemala, Nicaragua, and Zimbabwe, on breaking generational patterns of trauma and shame.

Website: https://ginabirkemeier.com/

Substack: Search Gina Birkemeier on Substack for weekly articles, journal prompts, and centering exercises.

Instagram: @myoutloudvoice

Resources Mentioned

Generations Deep: Unmasking Inherited Trauma and Dysfunction to Rewrite Our Stories Through Faith and Therapy By Gina Birkemeier, LPC

Generations Deep Workbook Features the ETPQ, Expanded Trauma Perspective Questionnaire, developed with 60 trauma-informed therapists.

Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl Discussed in relation to finding meaning between stimulus and response.

Dr. Dan Siegel's Hand Model of the Brain Discussed as a way to understand the "flipped lid" and amygdala hijacking.

About Jeff Jones

Jeff Jones helps families impacted by addiction understand how addiction affects the entire family system. Through his coaching, masterclass, book, and educational content, he helps families create clearer communication, healthier response patterns, and a different way forward.

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me.

Book a free discovery call: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

Brain Health Masterclass for Families Impacted by Addiction

This six-week masterclass helps families understand how addiction affects the entire family and move away from confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction. Families learn how to develop steadier, more intentional responses and create healthier patterns within the family.

Learn more: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution

In Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution, Jeff Jones offers a different way for families to understand addiction by looking at the family system as a whole. The book introduces practical tools, Both/And thinking, clearer communication, and family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos while maintaining connection with the person you love.

Get the book: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Connect With Jeff Jones

Work with Jeff: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution

Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

#InheritedTrauma #GenerationalTrauma #FamilyDysfunction #TraumaRecovery #FamilyRecovery #AddictionRecovery #FamilyAddictionSupport #NervousSystemRegulation #BreakingGenerationalCycles #HealingFamilies

In this episode of Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery, I'm joined by my colleague and friend Kristin Horstman, a gray area drinking coach.

We dive into what "gray area drinking" actually means, why traditional labels like "alcoholic" often create barriers to getting help, and how families can use nervous system regulation, co-regulation, and targeted nutrition to break the cycle of cravings and support long-term healing.

🎧 Follow or subscribe to Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery for more conversations about addiction and family recovery.

⭐ Leave a review and share this episode with someone who may benefit from it.

About Kristin Horstman

Kristin Horstman is a gray area drinking coach, speaker, and community facilitator who helps individuals navigate life without alcohol by focusing on nervous system regulation, amino acid nutrition, and daily somatic habits.

After ending her own 20-year relationship with alcohol, she now helps others build vibrant, alcohol-free lives. She is also a facilitator for Zero Proof Experiences and the host of the podcast Sunsets Are the New Happy Hour.

Website: https://kristenhorstman.com/

Podcast: Sunsets Are the New Happy Hour https://www.youtube.com/@kristinhorstman

About Jeff Jones

Jeff Jones helps families impacted by addiction understand how addiction affects the entire family system. Through his coaching, masterclass, book, and educational content, he helps families create clearer communication, healthier response patterns, and a different way forward.

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me.

Book a free discovery call: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

Brain Health Masterclass for Families Impacted by Addiction

This six-week masterclass helps families understand how addiction affects the entire family and move away from confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction. Families learn how to develop steadier, more intentional responses and create healthier patterns within the family.

Learn more: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution

In Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution, Jeff Jones offers a different way for families to understand addiction by looking at the family system as a whole. The book introduces practical tools, Both/And thinking, clearer communication, and family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos while maintaining connection with the person you love.

Get the book: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Connect With Jeff Jones

Work with Jeff: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution

Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

#GrayAreaDrinking #AlcoholFreeLiving #SoberCurious #NervousSystemRegulation #AlcoholRecovery #AddictionRecovery #FamilyRecovery #FamilyAddictionSupport

In this episode of Families Navigating Addiction and Recovery, I sit down with Christina Veselak, founder of the Academy for Addiction and Mental Health Nutrition and a licensed marriage and family therapist. We explore the critical, often-overlooked "third leg" of addiction recovery: stabilizing brain chemistry through targeted amino acid therapy and nutrition to eliminate cravings and prevent relapse.

Christina T. Veselak is the founder of the Academy for Addiction and Mental Health Nutrition and a licensed marriage and family therapist with over 30 years of experience. She specializes in online relapse prevention coaching, mental health nutrition, and consulting for residential detox programs. She is also a founding member and former Executive Director of the Alliance for Addiction Solutions. Website: aminoacidtherapy.com Recommended Resources & Reading Books: Seven Weeks to Sobriety by Joan Mathews Larson The Mood Cure by Julia Ross Eat for Recovery: A Guide to Radiant Recovery by Christina Veselak Tools & Kits: Research, training, and low-cost dietary tools at eatingproteinsaveslives.org

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me here: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

A 6-Session Masterclass for Families Impacted by Addiction

Addiction doesn't just affect the person using. It reshapes the entire family. In this 6-week masterclass, you'll learn how to move out of confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction, and begin developing steadier, more intentional leadership within your family. This premium masterclass upgrade includes instant access, learn-at-your-own-pace lessons, and full course access for families who are ready to better understand addiction's impact and begin creating new response patterns. Learn more: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution In Rethinking Addiction:

The New Family Recovery Solution, Jeff Jones offers a different way for families to understand addiction, not by focusing only on fixing the individual, but by looking at the family system as a whole. The book introduces practical tools, Both/And thinking, clearer communication, and a new way to create family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos while staying connected to the person you love. Get the book: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Connect with Jeff Jones

Work with Jeff: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution

Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

In this episode, I'm sharing an overview from Session 6 of my 6-week Brain Health Masterclass for Families Impacted by Addiction.

This session is about making your best decisions with more confidence, especially when addiction in the family has created stress, fear, and uncertainty.

When addiction is present, decision-making can become reactive. You may find yourself making choices out of fear, exhaustion, or habit. Sometimes that looks like black-and-white thinking, either cutting your loved one off completely or continuing to tolerate the chaos and stress addiction creates.

In this episode, I talk about how to slow that process down and become more conscious of your decisions. I also share why it matters to create your own decision-making criteria, rather than waiting until a crisis forces your next choice.

I'll walk through ideas like Both/And thinking, family-based decision-making, the 10-10-10 model, and the cost of doing nothing.

My hope is that this episode helps you look at your decisions with greater clarity, honesty, and care for yourself and your family.

This episode also connects with ideas from my book, Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution, where I share a different way for families to understand addiction, communicate differently, and create family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos.

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me here:

https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

A 6-Session Masterclass for Families Impacted by Addiction

Addiction doesn't just affect the person using. It reshapes the entire family. In this 6-week masterclass, you'll learn how to move out of confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction, and begin developing steadier, more intentional leadership within your family. This premium masterclass upgrade includes instant access, learn-at-your-own-pace lessons, and full course access for families who are ready to better understand addiction's impact and begin creating new response patterns.

Learn more: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution

In Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution, Jeff Jones offers a different way for families to understand addiction, not by focusing only on fixing the individual, but by looking at the family system as a whole. The book introduces practical tools, Both/And thinking, clearer communication, and a new way to create family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos while staying connected to the person you love.

Get the book: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Connect with Jeff Jones

Work with Jeff: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution

Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

In this episode of the Families Navigating Addiction & Recovery podcast, I'm sharing an overview of Session 4 of my Brain Health Masterclass for Families, titled "Building Healthier Connections." In this session, I talk about how one person in the family can begin a change process that is not dependent on the addicted person changing first. I explore what it means to build a healthier connection with your loved one, especially if your goal is to influence the relationship in a new way. This includes looking at boundaries as more than rules or limits, but as a way to understand what is okay, what is not okay, and what happens next, so your nervous system can stay steady enough for you to communicate with more clarity. I also talk about verbal and nonverbal communication, the power of slowing your reaction into a response, and the incremental strategies families can use to stay connected while still honoring their own needs and values. My hope is that this episode helps you see that a healthier connection does not mean tolerating everything. It means becoming more conscious, more grounded, and more intentional in how you relate to addiction and to the person you love.

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me here:

https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

A 6-Session Masterclass for Families Impacted by Addiction

Addiction doesn't just affect the person using. It reshapes the entire family. In this 6-week masterclass, you'll learn how to move out of confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction, and begin developing steadier, more intentional leadership within your family. This premium masterclass upgrade includes instant access, learn-at-your-own-pace lessons, and full course access for families who are ready to better understand addiction's impact and begin creating new response patterns.

Learn more: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution

In Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution, Jeff Jones offers a different way for families to understand addiction, not by focusing only on fixing the individual, but by looking at the family system as a whole. The book introduces practical tools, Both/And thinking, clearer communication, and a new way to create family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos while staying connected to the person you love.

Get the book: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Connect with Jeff Jones

Work with Jeff: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution

Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

In this episode of the Families Navigating Addiction & Recovery podcast, I'm sharing an overview of Session 3 of my Brain Health Masterclass for Families, titled "Fueling Your Personal Resilience." In this session, I talk about why families often stay focused on trying to change the person with addiction first, even when that person's brain and behavior may be deeply affected by addiction. Instead, I introduce the idea of enabling health within your own body as a first step. This means learning how to support your own nervous system, thinking, daily habits, and physical resilience so you can respond with greater clarity rather than reacting out of fear, stress, or exhaustion. I also talk about bionutritional healing, amino acids, nutrient-dense foods, and simple inside-out practices, like morning and evening routines, that help create new patterns over time. My hope is that this episode helps you see that your own health and resilience are not separate from your family's recovery. They are part of the foundation for staying grounded, connected, and better able to influence change.

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me here:

https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

A 6-Session Masterclass for Families Impacted by Addiction

Addiction doesn't just affect the person using. It reshapes the entire family. In this 6-week masterclass, you'll learn how to move out of confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction, and begin developing steadier, more intentional leadership within your family. This premium masterclass upgrade includes instant access, learn-at-your-own-pace lessons, and full course access for families who are ready to better understand addiction's impact and begin creating new response patterns.

Learn more: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution

In Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution, Jeff Jones offers a different way for families to understand addiction, not by focusing only on fixing the individual, but by looking at the family system as a whole. The book introduces practical tools, Both/And thinking, clearer communication, and a new way to create family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos while staying connected to the person you love.

Get the book: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Connect with Jeff Jones

Work with Jeff: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution

Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

In this episode of the Families Navigating Addiction & Recovery podcast, I'm sharing an overview from Session 2 of my Brain Health Masterclass for Families, called Finding Calm in the Storm of Addiction. When addiction is active in the family, it can feel like being pulled into raging rapids, where your attention narrows, your nervous system reacts, and you find yourself repeating the same arguments or patterns again and again. In this episode, I talk about how mindfulness can help you pause before reacting, how body sensations can become warning signs and guides, and how understanding the stress-trauma continuum can help you recognize what is happening inside you before the situation escalates. My hope is that this episode helps you begin shifting from automatic reactions into more grounded responses, so you can stay connected to yourself and begin creating a different kind of influence in the middle of addiction's chaos.

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me here:

https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

A 6-Session Masterclass for Families Impacted by Addiction

Addiction doesn't just affect the person using. It reshapes the entire family. In this 6-week masterclass, you'll learn how to move out of confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction, and begin developing steadier, more intentional leadership within your family. This premium masterclass upgrade includes instant access, learn-at-your-own-pace lessons, and full course access for families who are ready to better understand addiction's impact and begin creating new response patterns.

Learn more: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution

In Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution, Jeff Jones offers a different way for families to understand addiction, not by focusing only on fixing the individual, but by looking at the family system as a whole. The book introduces practical tools, Both/And thinking, clearer communication, and a new way to create family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos while staying connected to the person you love.

Get the book: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Connect with Jeff Jones

Work with Jeff: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution

Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

When addiction is present in a family, it can be hard to know what to believe, what to do, or which direction to take. There are so many competing messages coming from culture, community, treatment models, and even our own family history.

In this episode of the Families Navigating Addiction & Recovery podcast, I talk about how these mixed messages can create confusion, rigid thinking, and conflict between family members and the person they love who is in addiction. I also explore the difference between outside-in and inside-out approaches, why it matters to question your own thinking, and how families can begin to view addiction through a Both/And lens rather than getting stuck on one "right" answer.

My hope is that this episode helps you slow down, recognize the mixed messages around you, and begin making decisions that are more aligned with your values and your family's healing arc.

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me here:

https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

A 6-Session Masterclass for Families Impacted by Addiction

Addiction doesn't just affect the person using. It reshapes the entire family. In this 6-week masterclass, you'll learn how to move out of confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction, and begin developing steadier, more intentional leadership within your family. This premium masterclass upgrade includes instant access, learn-at-your-own-pace lessons, and full course access for families who are ready to better understand addiction's impact and begin creating new response patterns.

Learn more: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution

In Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution, Jeff Jones offers a different way for families to understand addiction, not by focusing only on fixing the individual, but by looking at the family system as a whole. The book introduces practical tools, Both/And thinking, clearer communication, and a new way to create family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos while staying connected to the person you love.

Get the book: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Connect with Jeff Jones

Work with Jeff: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution

Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

In this first episode of the new season of the Families Navigating Addiction & Recovery podcast, I'm reintroducing the heart of this work and what you can expect moving forward. After a six-year hiatus, I'm coming back with weekly episodes focused on empowering families impacted by addiction, especially families who have been told they are powerless until their loved one decides to change. I'll be sharing more about the Healing Arc inside my Brain Health Masterclass, including mixed messages in addiction, finding calm in the storm, fueling personal resilience, building healthier connections, restoring peace to family life, and making better decisions along the way. My hope is that this season gives families a clearer pathway to begin their own healing process, create new conversations, and become stronger than addiction's rules of engagement.

If your family is navigating addiction and you're looking for a different way forward, I invite you to schedule a free discovery call with me here:

https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/book-a-call/

A 6-Session Masterclass for Families Impacted by Addiction

Addiction doesn't just affect the person using. It reshapes the entire family. In this 6-week masterclass, you'll learn how to move out of confusion, emotional overload, and constant reaction, and begin developing steadier, more intentional leadership within your family. This premium masterclass upgrade includes instant access, learn-at-your-own-pace lessons, and full course access for families who are ready to better understand addiction's impact and begin creating new response patterns.

Learn more: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/masterclass-upgrade/

Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution

In Rethinking Addiction: The New Family Recovery Solution, Jeff Jones offers a different way for families to understand addiction, not by focusing only on fixing the individual, but by looking at the family system as a whole. The book introduces practical tools, Both/And thinking, clearer communication, and a new way to create family rules that are stronger than addiction's chaos while staying connected to the person you love.

Get the book: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/rethinking-addiction-book/

Connect with Jeff Jones

Work with Jeff: https://www.thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-jones-0303834/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thefamilyrecoverysolution

Substack: https://jeffjones.substack.com/

"So much of what we do perpetuates problems, not by intent, but by a lack of understanding." -Dr. Mike Barnes

The main focus of the recovery process is often given to the addict in the family and there's nothing wrong with that. It is out of genuine love that they go to great lengths to make sure the needs of their loved one are well provided for. But for family recovery to be realized in its entirety, they must look into the often undermined effects of addiction: trauma. Family members don't realize that they are traumatized until they start prioritizing their own needs. Hence today's episode homes in on how to help family members realize that they are traumatized and help them recover from it. Our guest, Dr. Mike Barnes also talks about the biology of how we cope with problems and the epigenetics of addiction and trauma. This understanding will greatly help in the treatment and recovery process that families may choose along their journey. He also differentiates between problem and crisis and how our stories create an impact on the decisions we make. Dr. Barnes also gives some suggestions in making the paradigm shift in family recovery even more effective. It only takes one or two members to spark the change. The question now lies on who's going to take that privilege.

Get the show notes, transcription and resources mentioned at http://thefamilyrecoverysolution.com/

Highlights:

03:47 Serving Families With Addiction

10:47 Living in Recovery Together

18:32 Coping Begins With Family Goals and Values

23:48 Helping Families To Understand That They Are Traumatized

31:53 The Epigenetics of Addiction and Trauma

38:13 Understanding The Biology of How We Cope To And Solve Problems

44:50 3 Rules of an Alcoholic Family And How to Challenge Them

54:55 A Shift In Recovery Processes Needed