Family Matters

I've just become a victim of rape. I desperately need help and don't know where to find it – what should I do now? So far, I haven't told my parents, and no one else knows. I'm ashamed to admit it to friends and family, and I'm afraid I'll only make a bad situation worse if I go to the police. Meanwhile, I feel so dirty, guilty, worthless, desperate, and scared that I can hardly think or make a move.

Does it mean I'm gay if I'm attracted to someone of the same sex? There have been times when I've experienced strong emotional connections with individuals of my own gender. On occasion I've even felt myself physically drawn to them. I'm confused and don't know what to think of this. Can you help me?

Can you provide some guidance on how to navigate a marital separation? Our marriage has been plagued by conflict and emotional pain for a long, long time. As a result, we've come to the conclusion - sadly and reluctantly - that we need to get away from each other for a while. I honestly don't know if our relationship is going to survive, but for the sake of our kids and our own sanity I want to go about this process in the best way possible. Who should we tell? How should the two of us interact while separated? How do we handle finances and other practical matters? What other issues do we need to consider?

Does it mean I'm gay if I'm attracted to someone of the same sex? There have been times when I've experienced strong emotional connections with individuals of my own gender. On occasion I've even felt myself physically drawn to them. I'm confused and don't know what to think of this. Can you help me?

Does it mean I'm gay if I'm attracted to someone of the same sex? There have been times when I've experienced strong emotional connections with individuals of my own gender. On occasion I've even felt myself physically drawn to them. I'm confused and don't know what to think of this. Can you help me?

Should I feel uneasy about leaving my little one with a babysitter or dropping him off at the church nursery for an hour or so? I'm a new parent, and I don't know if it's healthy for my child to be separated from me, even for relatively short periods of time. What's your perspective on this?

Should a spouse who has had an affair be tested for sexually transmitted diseases and infections? My husband recently ended an affair, and we are working toward reconciliation. It's a touchy process and I don't want to do anything that might suggest a lack of trust or indicate that I haven't forgiven him. At the same time, I don't think my concerns are unreasonable. What should I do?

How can I find healing from the effects of disaster and trauma? Over the past month our community has been devastated by a terrible flood. The impact to my family has included the loss of our home, interruption of work and school, loss of income, physical deprivation, and overwhelming anxiety about the future. Now that the immediate danger is past and our present needs have been provided for (we're staying with family in another city), I'm beginning to realize that we're going to be coping with the emotional and psychological effects of this disaster for a long time to come. Can you help me get a handle on that process?

What can we do to get ready for the departure of our youngest child? He'll be going off to study after the end of this year, and my spouse and I will be left "on our own" as empty nesters. I've heard that many couples in our position face serious adjustments and are at risk for marital problems and even divorce. How can we prepare for this transition and avoid the potential pitfalls?

Why should I go to University? The way I see it, college isn't shaping the next generation into productive adults and leaders, and it doesn't help individual students achieve their personal goals. Why bury yourself in debt just because everyone else expects you to pursue "higher education"? Why waste several years of your life earning a worthless piece of paper only to end up working the same job alongside your high-school graduate friends? It just doesn't make sense.