Fierce, Kind Mama of Multiples

In this episode, I am joined by Dr Sophie Brock, a Motherhood Studies Sociologist and Mother who offers education on the sociology of motherhood and how our broader society shapes our experience as mothers.

Here's a summary of the main points discussed in this episode:

• Sense of Self and Identity: Mothers of multiples, particularly those with children who may have additional needs, grapple with the challenge of maintaining their sense of identity outside of their role as mothers. 
• Grief and Othering: There's a grieving process experienced by mothers of multiples, especially when their experiences don't align with the idealised version of motherhood. This can be compounded if one or more of their children have disabilities. Mothers may feel othered within the community of mothers of multiples, particularly if their children have additional needs.
• Individualization Theory: The individualization theory, which prioritizes individualism and independence, doesn't fit well for mothers, especially those caring for children with disabilities. It invisibilises socioeconomics, trauma, and the realities of marginalisation and privilege. Instead, interdependence and vulnerability are important aspects of human relationships and should be acknowledged.
• The Good Enough Mother: The concept of the good enough mother, coined by Donald Winnicott, emphasizes that there's no perfect mother. It's about embracing the reality of our humanity and acknowledging that tolerable failures are beneficial for both mothers and children. We discuss how mothers can examine their internalised ideals of motherhood and define motherhood on their own terms.
• Dealing with Judgments: Mothers, including those of multiples, often face judgment from others and themselves. Building tolerance for discomfort, connecting with personal values, and disentangling social scripts can help mothers navigate these judgments and find acceptance in their own mothering journey.

How to connect with Dr Sophie Brock:
Website:
https://drsophiebrock.com/
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/drsophiebrock/
Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/drsophiebrock/

Thanks for listening! If you are a soon-to-be or current parent of multiples, be sure to head over to my website http://www.fiercekindmama.com to get my FREE resources designed specifically for you!

Be sure to follow me on Instagram and Facebook too.

Credits:
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/aylex/with-you
License code: YLMJTQCPKRANEOVB

In this episode, I explore the often-overlooked emotional aspect of multiple-birth pregnancies. Many expectant mothers experience a range of fears and worries, from concerns about pregnancy complications to feelings of grief and loss. Despite the prevalence of these emotions, few professionals address the emotional well-being of expectant mothers, leaving many feeling isolated and misunderstood.

To address the emotional challenges of pregnancy, I discuss various relaxation techniques, including deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and guided imagery. These practices have been shown to reduce stress levels, improve sleep quality, and promote overall well-being. I also introduce the Breathe Easy program, a novel approach to relaxation designed specifically for pregnant mothers of multiples.

Click here to out more about the Breathe Easy program:

https://www.fiercekindmama.com/tapping

Thanks for listening! If you are a soon-to-be or current parent of multiples, be sure to head over to my website http://www.fiercekindmama.com to get my FREE resources designed specifically for you!

Be sure to follow me on Instagram and Facebook too.

Credits:
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/aylex/with-you
License code: YLMJTQCPKRANEOVB

In this episode, I speak with dedicated reflexologist, holistic practitioner and twin mum, Monique Thomas-Potter. Monique shares her story, which began with her Caribbean grandmother's holistic remedies and led her to pursue reflexology as a means of natural healing.

Despite the challenges of studying during a pandemic and caring
for her family, Monique persevered and launched her own business, Feel at Home
Reflexology. Through her practice, she specializes in supporting mothers,
especially those navigating fertility issues, pregnancy, and overall wellness.

Monique's holistic approach extends beyond foot massages; she
emphasizes the importance of understanding her clients' lifestyles, stressors,
and emotional well-being. Her services include education on reproductive
health, nutrition, and lifestyle adjustments tailored to each individual.

Throughout the conversation, Monique offers valuable advice for
mothers, encouraging them to prioritize self-care and reclaim personal time
without guilt. She emphasizes the importance of letting go of control and
sharing parenting responsibilities, empowering mothers to nurture themselves
while caring for their families.

You can connect with Monique on Instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/feelathomereflexology/

Thanks for listening! If you are a soon-to-be or current parent of multiples, be sure to head over to my website http://www.fiercekindmama.com to get my FREE resources designed specifically for you!

Be sure to follow me on Instagram and Facebook too.

Credits:
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/aylex/with-you
License code: YLMJTQCPKRANEOVB

In this episode, I answer a listener's question about whether she should send her multiples to childcare and how you know when your children are ready. 

First, I highlight that for many parents childcare is a necessity, not a choice, and that for the majority of multiple-birth parents, childcare is not affordable. 

Then, I speak about the debate in the literature about whether childcare is harmful or beneficial for children's development. I cover what aspects of the childcare facility and your children's needs should be taken into account when making a decision that suits your family. 

I emphasise the importance of balancing parental well-being with your children's needs when making a decision about childcare. 

Thanks for listening! If you are a soon-to-be or current parent of multiples, be sure to head over to my website http://www.fiercekindmama.com to get my FREE resources designed specifically for you!

Be sure to follow me on Instagram and Facebook too.

Credits:
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/aylex/with-you
License code: YLMJTQCPKRANEOVB

In this episode, Dr. Frankie Harrison shares her personal experience and professional insights into the often overlooked and challenging journey of parents whose babies require care in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU). Dr. Harrison recounts her own journey of unexpectedly facing prematurity and NICU care, highlighting the initial confusion and lack of understanding she experienced. She reflects on the common struggles parents face, including guilt, grief, and traumatic memories, shedding light on the long-term impact of the NICU experience on parental mental health.

Dr. Harrison emphasizes the need for greater awareness, education, and support for NICU parents, lamenting the current lack of preparation and resources available. She discusses the importance of addressing mental health needs and providing ongoing support beyond the immediate NICU discharge period. Dr. Harrison advocates for systemic changes in maternity care to better prepare and support parents facing NICU journeys, emphasizing the importance of early intervention and comprehensive support services.

This is a must-listen episode for any soon-to-be or current parent of multiples who wants to be informed and learn how to deal with the challenges of a NICU stay.

You can connect with Frankie here:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/miraclemoonuk/
Podcast:  https://open.spotify.com/show/4OdVSVmIGW5638zg3p9Hqj
Website: https://www.miraclemoon.co.uk/

Thanks for listening! If you are a soon-to-be or current parent of multiples, be sure to head over to my website http://www.fiercekindmama.com to get my FREE resources designed specifically for you!

Be sure to follow me on Instagram and Facebook too.

Credits:
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/aylex/with-you
License code: YLMJTQCPKRANEOVB

In this thought-provoking episode, join me as I discuss the historical and contemporary biases faced by mothers, both in the context of parenting and in the workplace. I start by highlighting the longstanding tradition of blaming mothers for their children’s problems, attributing developmental issues to a mother’s perceived failure. 

The discussion extends to workplace dynamics, exploring how gender stereotypes influence judgements. I talk about a body of research that has demonstrated that mothers, even in the same roles and with the same commitments, are judged more harshly than fathers. 

Personal anecdotes and reflections are woven into the narrative, and I encourage you as you listen to this episode to reflect on your own experiences and potential biases. 

My hope is that this episode will spark a conversation about how gender biases continue to shape perceptions and impact the lives of women, especially in the realm of parenting and professional endeavours. 

Thanks for listening! If you are a soon-to-be or current parent of multiples, be sure to head over to my website http://www.fiercekindmama.com to get my FREE resources designed specifically for you!

Be sure to follow me on Instagram and Facebook too.

Credits:
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/aylex/with-you
License code: YLMJTQCPKRANEOVB

Joining us from the heart of Texas, Michelle Cruz is not just a birth doula but a dynamic force, an advocate, and the President of the Central Texas Doula Association. Her passion lies in supporting families through the incredible journey of pregnancy and birth. Michelle's advocacy particularly shines in her dedication to individuals identifying as Fat, Black, Indigenous, and People of Colour.

Michelle is a mother of three, including twins. She also identifies as a neurodivergent individual. Through her advocacy and work, she's making waves in supporting adult learners, emphasizing education, and breaking down barriers.

Michelle delves into her personal experiences and those of the mothers she supports, shedding light on the discrimination and inequity prevalent in the healthcare system and beyond. This interview is not just a conversation; it's a powerful narrative exposing the challenges faced by many, especially Black Mamas.

Throughout our conversation, Michelle's vibrant personality shines. Her commitment and dedication to her family and her work are evident. You'll hear her speak not only as an advocate but as a mother who navigates the complexities of life, sharing stories that resonate deeply.

I hope as you listen to this episode, you feel inspired and enlightened.

If you'd like to connect with Michelle or learn more about her work, her details are:

Email: [email protected]

Social media: @galacticdoula

Website: https://linktr.ee/galacticdoula

Thanks for listening! If you are a soon-to-be or current parent of multiples, be sure to head over to my website http://www.fiercekindmama.com to get my FREE resources designed specifically for you!

Be sure to follow me on Instagram and Facebook too.

Credits:
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/aylex/with-you
License code: YLMJTQCPKRANEOVB

Important annoucement
Sadly, the majority of multiple-birth parents report overwhelming exhaustion at some point in their parenting journey.

To help you with this, I've created a FREE, on-demand workshop that is available until the 28th of February, 2024 called Unwind and Thrive: 5 Simple Ways to Avoid Burnout as a Parent of Multiples.

Ideal for both soon-to-be and current parents of multiples. To sign up, head over to https://www.fiercekindmama.com/burnout

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In today's episode, I answer a listener's question, a scenario familiar to many parents of multiples— the challenge of managing newborn twins alongside a toddler. The listener writes about the difficulty of juggling multiple children, especially when leaving the house which feels like an overwhelming task.

In this episode, I address a number of topics including:

• the benefits of getting outside for you and your kids;
• the challenges and risks;
• what happens when our access to outdoor play is limited;
• practical tips for getting out and managing on your own;
• and how to embrace outdoor play in all sorts of weather conditions. 

Thanks for listening! If you are a soon-to-be or current parent of multiples, be sure to head over to my website http://www.fiercekindmama.com to get my FREE resources designed specifically for you!

Be sure to follow me on Instagram and Facebook too.

Credits:
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/aylex/with-you
License code: YLMJTQCPKRANEOVB

Important annoucement
Sadly, the majority of multiple-birth parents report overwhelming exhaustion at some point in their parenting journey.

To help you with this, I've created a FREE, on-demand workshop that is available until the 28th of February, 2024 called Unwind and Thrive: 5 Simple Ways to Avoid Burnout as a Parent of Multiples.

Ideal for both soon-to-be and current parents of multiples. To sign up, head over to https://www.fiercekindmama.com/burnout

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On today's episode, I am joined by Adelle Sushames, a clinical psychologist specializing in supporting neurodivergent individuals, including those with autism and ADHD. We delve into the crucial topic of neurodivergence, aiming to dispel misconceptions while offering practical guidance, particularly for parents of neurodivergent kids.

Adelle sheds light on what neurodivergence means and provides valuable advice for parents navigating the unique challenges of raising neurodivergent children. A poignant aspect is the emphasis on self-check-ins, recognizing that parents themselves may be neurodivergent, adding an extra layer to the familial dynamics.

Acknowledging the heightened demands on parents of multiples, the episode offers practical strategies and information to assist those in similar situations. The goal is to provide support not just for individuals with neurodivergence but also for their families.

A significant point of discussion is the shift towards a neuroaffirming approach, moving away from perceiving autism and ADHD as disorders. Adelle stresses the importance of adopting a more positive and understanding perspective, aligning with the evolving neurodiversity movement.

Throughout the interview, there's a genuine exploration of the richness, strengths, and untapped potential within neurodiverse individuals. The episode encourages listeners to rethink preconceived notions and embrace a more inclusive and affirming view of neurodivergence. As a listener, you'll gain practical insights and a deeper understanding of the diverse experiences of those living with autism and/or ADHD.

How to connect with Adelle Sushames:

[email protected]

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/p/neurodivergent_ally-100086549260650/?paipv=0&eav=AfZCCTONe4eO1QPBDV2fYTT0BtKgtG6Pl5jxdUUC7HXw-iWFlE6jLEjnO_SVq50LBK0&_rdr

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/neurodivergent_ally/

Thanks for listening! If you are a soon-to-be or current parent of multiples, be sure to head over to my website http://www.fiercekindmama.com to get my FREE resources designed specifically for you!

Be sure to follow me on Instagram and Facebook too.

Credits:
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/aylex/with-you
License code: YLMJTQCPKRANEOVB

Join me in this solo episode where first, I make a very special announcement.

Then, I reflect on the holiday season and ask you to consider what the holiday season means to you.

I also speak about mindfulness and introduce three techniques that can help you deal with stress during the holidays and beyond.

Finally,  I introduce some Danish words that can help you to avoid overextending yourself and deal with minor inconveniences during the holidays.

Articles discussed in this episode:
Shattell, M. & Johnson, A. (2017). Three simple mindfulness to manage holiday stress. Journal of Psychosocial Nursing & Mental Health Services. Vol 55 (12). 2-4.

Helweg-Larsen, M. (2022). How to deal with holiday stress, Danish-style. The Conversation U.S. Boston. 06 Dec 2022. 

Thanks for listening! If you are a soon-to-be or current parent of multiples, be sure to head over to my website http://www.fiercekindmama.com to get my FREE resources designed specifically for you!

Be sure to follow me on Instagram and Facebook too.

Credits:
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/aylex/with-you
License code: YLMJTQCPKRANEOVB