🔥 Follow Me to the M-R-O-P!

What happens when a man discovers that the life he has built is no longer the life his soul is asking him to live?

In this second episode of Follow Me to the M-R-O-P!, host Brian Mueller sits down with Dan Vanoli for a deeply honest conversation about his experience of the Men’s Rites of Passage. Dan shares how he arrived at the rites carrying anger, disappointment, and a growing awareness that something in him needed to change. What he found was not simply a retreat, but a threshold experience—an awakening that began to loosen the grip of ego and open him to humility, brotherhood, and a more grounded spiritual life.

Dan reflects on the power of ritual, the stillness of the contemplative sit, the unexpected calm of drumming, and the way the rites continued working in him long after the weekend ended. He also speaks candidly about how this journey reshaped his understanding of masculinity, helped him confront patterns of ego and toxic conditioning, and led him into lasting community with other initiated men.

If you’ve ever felt the quiet ache for a new direction—or sensed that real transformation might begin with surrender—this conversation is for you.

Episode Highlights

• Why MROP became a “doorway” into a different life
• Entering the rites with fear, trust, and a hunger for change
• The impact of ritual, drumming, and the contemplative sit
• How the rites challenged ego and toxic masculinity
• Why brotherhood and community helped the transformation take root

Links & Resources

• Choosing Presence (Sponsor): https://choosingpresence.org
• Practicing Presence App: https://choosingpresence.org/app
• Illuman MROP page: https://illuman.org/mrop
• Adam's Return by Richard Rohr: https://amzn.to/3PzVESH
• Falling Upward by Richard Rohr: https://amzn.to/4uUM64P
• Breathing Under Water by Richard Rohr: https://amzn.to/47qLNVp
• Host: https://brianmueller.com

Credits

• First and foremost, thank you to Dan Vanoli for sharing his journey and his heart with us today.
• Thank you to Fr. Richard Rohr and the men of Illuman who have stewarded the Men’s Rites of Passage since 1996.
• Thank you to Jim Heaney and Jim Taylor for their dedication to Choosing Presence.

Music Credits:

• Slow Mo Dreams by Soundroll
• Becoming a Legend by Vens Adams

What happens when a man crosses the threshold from striving and achievement into meaning and soul?

In this first episode of Follow Me to the M-R-O-P!, host Brian Mueller sits down with Chester Trocha to talk about his experience of the Men’s Rites of Passage (MROP)—not as a lecture or abstract explanation, but as a real, personal story. Chester reflects on the impact of Pilgrim Park, the power of ritual and council, the tenderness that surfaced after the weekend, and how the rites became a “slow burn” that reshaped his inner life over time. If you’ve felt a tug in your own soul—especially at a crossroads—this conversation is for you.

Episode Highlights

• Why MROP is an initiation, not just another retreat
• The role of nature, place, and “connection”
• Ritual, mystery, and the power of men’s council
• What shifted (slowly) after returning to everyday life
• How centering prayer / the “morning sit” became foundational

Links & Resources

• Choosing Presence (Sponsor): https://choosingpresence.org
• Practicing Presence App: https://choosingpresence.org/app
• Illuman MROP page: https://illuman.org/mrop
• Adam's Return by Richard Rohr: https://amzn.to/3PzVESH
• Falling Upward by Richard Rohr: https://amzn.to/4uUM64P
• Breathing Under Water by Richard Rohr: https://amzn.to/47qLNVp
• Host: https://brianmueller.com

Credits

• First and foremost, thank you to Chester Trocha for sharing his journey and his heart with us today.
• Thank you to Fr. Richard Rohr and the men of Illuman who have stewarded the Men’s Rites of Passage since 1996.
• Thank you to Jim Heaney and Jim Taylor for their dedication to Choosing Presence.

Music Credits:

• Slow Mo Dreams by Soundroll
• Becoming a Legend by Vens Adams