We get into the Eddie Howe in vs out noise after Newcastle go out of the League Cup, and why match-going fans and online fans sound like they’re watching different sports. We also talk Chelsea vs Arsenal and Rossini’s game plan, why punditry changes depending on the final score, and that Telegraph piece about Arsenal fans, plus AFTV and the wider culture of performative football content. Then we detour into deadline day drama, aphantasia, and somehow end up rating films and debating whether Dan has hair.

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We kick off with deadline day frazzle, Palace doing business late because we’re watching the market rather than dictating it, and the Mateta to Milan saga that died on medical fears and a chronic knee issue. That spirals into Strand-Larsen’s price, Palace’s form, and whether Mateta is basically finished with the fanbase.

From there we zoom out to Spurs’ grim January, injuries stacking up, Romero having another pop, and the argument that you solve the problem now, not in six months when everyone’s “happy”. Then we hit the Newcastle debate: has Eddie Howe gone stale or is he still their best bet given the constraints? We wrap with West Ham’s very pointed Paquetá statement, the reality that footballers move like mercenaries, and a bit of film chat because apparently we’ve started beefing with listeners about Nolan too

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We love the Champions League format and why, despite the moaning, it’s producing absolute mayhem. From the Goal Show chaos to Benfica’s wild win, Mourinho staying relevant, and Bodo Glimt doing Bodo Glimt things, it’s pure jeopardy TV. Then we pivot into Premier League vs Europe, what Arne Slot probably shouldn’t have said out loud, and a quick wander through Sterling leaving Chelsea, Palace panic, and Spurs somehow grinding on through a ridiculous injury list.

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The title race is properly alive, Arsenal fans are booing while still top of the league, and we’re sat here trying to work out when football became this emotionally unstable. We get into United suddenly looking like a real team again under Carrick, that ridiculous Dorgu strike, and why players chirping on socials is never worth the aggro. Then we pivot into the real misery: Palace vibes are cooked, Dan’s officially Glasner out, and we talk through why it feels totally untenable. Plus: Mateta, The Overlap, weird fan standards, a Chelsea-themed Dubai development with blue sand (yes, really), and the ongoing Spurs-Palace cosmic link as we both spiral towards the same bit of the table.

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We’re fresh off The Overlap and straight into the chaos. Chelsea’s “yes man” manager chat, the weirdness of them not nailing a proper shirt sponsor, and why multi-club ownership “blind trusts” feel like a total con. Then we’re onto Real Madrid being a basket case, Trent potentially getting binned already, and why England clubs are starting to swallow the Champions League format whole. There’s Palace drama too, Mateta’s rocking the boat, Strand Larsen links, and a little corner reserved for Gary Cotterell doing the most cringe question imaginable. Plus: can Declan Rice ever win the Ballon d’Or, or are we all just losing our minds?

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We’ve had a week of it. Villa fans came for us in numbers after The Overlap dragged up an old Big Six debate clip, so naturally we’ve now got a lifelong vendetta. Then we spiral into the proper stuff: why VAR has killed goal celebrations, why five minute offside checks are a disgrace, and whether football was better when you just glanced at the lino and went mad. There’s Spurs misery, West Ham dread, protest chat, Gallagher being “a terrier”, a quick detour into Chelsea, and a bumper comments section featuring the Raggett brothers, scrap invitations, and the legendary Sandwich Video.

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In this episode we confirm Dan’s okay after a short break, then dive straight into Crystal Palace’s humiliating FA Cup exit and why it may be the worst performance in the club’s modern history. From there we broaden the conversation to Tottenham, Chelsea and beyond, asking who really carries responsibility in modern football: the head coach on the touchline or the directors and ownership behind the scenes. We discuss Thomas Frank’s situation at Spurs, Oliver Glasner’s uncertain future at Palace, Chelsea’s new manager and the pressures of leading elite players in the social media era. Plus listener questions, FA Cup fallout, and the strange reality of supporting football clubs that always seem to find new ways to test you.

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This one starts with numbness and ends somewhere between catharsis and chaos. We talk about the unspoken contract you sign with your football club for life, why some fans walk away and why most of us never really can. Spurs being a mess, Palace perspective, watching football out of habit rather than hope, and how results hit differently when it’s also your job. There’s burnout, sleep deprivation, social media fatigue, managers losing the room, The Panenka being a crime against football, and why talking it all through with your mates might be the only thing that keeps you sane.

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We start with Spurs and quickly ask a bigger question. When football gets this dull, what are fans meant to cling to? We talk Thomas Frank, clean sheets that feel joyless, away ends singing old songs to stay sane, and whether pragmatism has gone too far. From Spurs to Chelsea’s chaos,

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