Football Revisited 1979/80

In the second of our new Series, Steven Scragg tells Gary Thacker all about the stadium he calls home - Anfield.

Our look at some of the significant managers from World Cups past brings us to West Germany in 1974 and Helmut Schon.

Born in the East, in charge of the West, no wonder he struggled under the pressure of the two sides clashing. Aidan is joined by Chris Evans, author of the excellent 'How to Win the World Cup' to chat all things Schon, and how he created the right environment for West Germany to succeed.

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Pre-match, referee and Ernie Wise impersonator Kevin McNally promises us a sparkling game, but it appears he has laced the pudding with far too many eggs. Played out on a surface under three feet of mud, sparkling it isn’t, but it is truly glorious in so many other ways, including an acrobatic save from the St. John’s Ambulance man.

Alan Stevenson turns saving shots with his back into an art form, Turf Moor is invaded by second half balloons, and then we settle into the Denis Smith show. Already booked, he maims a stray striker before limping from the carnage, convincing Mr. McNally of his innocence. Yet Smith will soon see his red card, and not in the way you are expecting… And we have a golden post-match interview from Alan Durban to dissect too.

Just when you think it can’t get any better, we head for a submerged Shay and the further misadventures of Malcolm Allison in what is a footballing equivalent of the Undersea World of Jacques Cousteau. These are the days when random kids could enjoy playtime on a patch of land behind the goal while Joe Corrigan is desperately trying to keep his side afloat. Meanwhile, somebody has pinched half of the roof of the main stand. It wasn’t Romark, who weaves his magic in the Halifax dressing room.

Steven Scragg & Dave Bowler revel in the golden age of the FA Cup.

Middlesbrough have the misfortune of turning up at Anfield as Liverpool are in full flow, dispensing a routine 4-0 beating without breaking into a sweat. Craig Johnston has the good sense to injure himself early on, while Jim Platt attempts to better King Canute, but is overwhelmed by the red tide. All is so straightforward that Graeme Souness doesn’t even bother to maim any of his former colleagues.

There’s time for a trip to The Hawthorns where West Bromwich Albion and Everton are sartorial elegance itself in glorious Umbro kits. The quality of the game is not quite so polished.

Elsewhere, Don Revie finds himself in Courtroom 13 and immediately invests in a hundredweight of rabbit’s feet to try to lift the curse. Richard Adams is moved to write Watership Down in response.

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November 1979, the mud is upon us, the chill winds of the days before global warming are rippling across Villa Park, and Jimmy Rimmer is happily throwing goals into his own net.

Meanwhile, there’s a dog on the pitch and commentator Hugh Johns is so delighted that he resembles said canine with an additional appendage. Once upon a time, says the sagacious Johns, you’d always find a dog on the pitch at a football match. Whether this was in real life or simply in the pages of Boys Own comics, who can say…

It’s a game that is not short on incident and controversy, and we are later treated to the lip-reading brilliance of Brian Moore following the dismissal of Denis Smith. The game holds Steve Scragg and Dave Bowler spellbound.

You can watch this thrilling episode of Cruft’s here.

And if that wasn’t enough, we head to Carrow Road for a bit of Norwich City against Southampton - and a chance to marvel at the suave sophistication of Kevin Keelan. There’s even a goal for Steve Daley of Manchester City. It’s a bumper collection.

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In one of the greatest televisual meetings of all time, Brian Moore - clearly underemployed during the ITV technicians’s strike early in the season - nips over to Hamburg to report on the lifestyle of England’s greatest superstar of the moment, Kevin Keegan.

We won’t spoil it for you, but this is absolute gold, from Keegan snubbing Thatcher to maximising every penny he can get, from being overrun by sheepdogs to another helpless shrug from the long-suffering Jean, from deciding to go into politics, but only straight in as Prime Minister, this is the 1,000mph life of Kevin Keegan.

If you only ever listen to one podcast for the rest of eternity, this is the one. God bless King Kev.

The galvanising force of the Manchester derby gets Manchester City playing once again, Malcolm Allison’s men shrugging off their hapless defending as they take on Dave Sexton’s side.

Elsewhere Nottingham Forest travel to The Dell and are bombarded into submission, so much so that even Kenny Burns can’t catch anybody to kick up into the air.

And we dip into Brian Moore’s postbag to decide if the offside rulings of the previous week were right or not. In a time before GDPR, Brian delights in reading out your full address, all the way down to the postcode, so that the local refereeing association can pop round and duff you up.

A trip to the Second Division begins this weekend as ITV screen the top of the table clash between Luton Town and QPR, the two leading the way in a congested promotion race. It’s a terrific game with plenty of action and lots to talk about.

But there’s much, much more, for the mighty Eric Morecambe, only just recovered from heart surgery, has taken his place at Kenilworth Road once more. Afterwards, he treats Brian Moore, and the nation, to a post-match interview, in which his delight at a defeat for Elton John’s Watford is barely concealed.

So, what do you think of the show so far?

Don’t answer that.

Emlyn Hughes returns to Anfield in a Wolves shirt, and gets a dose of the medicine he’d been dishing out for the previous decade, while Match of the Day pinches some of Top of the Pops’ graphics to celebrate. Referee Don Shaw does his level best to upstage him.

You can watch Liverpool continue on their merry way here.

Terry Venables and Malcolm Allison, two coaching peas in a pod you might think, but in football, there’s no room for the old pals act when league points are at stake. With newly promoted Palace enjoying life in the upper reaches of the First Division, the visit of Manchester City is just what you want to keep the pressure on at the top, especially if Venables had watched City’s complete surrender to Liverpool on ‘Match of the Day’ the previous week.

Again though, the real glory comes in the post-match interview, held in a Selhurst Park dressing room that looks worse than any school changing room you might have had to endure in your youth.

El Tel and Big Mal audition for the roles of Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin in a reboot of the Rat Pack, Allison possibly not endearing himself to City supporters with the seemingly casual way he is taking the complete collapse of his team: “Joe Corrigan, he’s got beautiful hands. But the ball went straight through them.” LaughalongaMal here.

Somewhere, Romark is lighting up another stogie and helping himself to a large brandy…

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