Hey, Lovebugs! Today, we have a curated coaching session where a client and I explore being a woman and the complementary dance with male energy. We're answering the question: What happens when a man requests more time without exclusivity?

Set in Italy and Paris, my client learns how to navigate the delicate balance between dating while traveling as a digital nomad.

Happy Women’s History Month, and happy listening! I invite you to drop your truth for a chance to have your story inspire the next Secret Story episode! If you'd like to keep the podcast in production, consider making a donation. Thank you!

Time Stamps:

[0:48] - I shout out to Quinta Brunson in honor of Women’s History Month and recommend her book.

[2:51] - This pop-up episode is about owning your womanhood.

[5:15] - What do you do when he asks for more time?

[6:45] - Considering Mr. X's suggestion, my client contemplates altering her travel plans to stay in Paris.

[9:04] - I encourage the client to reconsider Mr. X's suggestion about staying longer in Europe.

[10:41] - I advise my client to communicate her need for clarity.

[12:49] - I encourage her to revisit the conversation to determine the strength of Mr. X's proposal.

[15:20] - I insist that she recognizes her efforts; she has earned the opportunity presented by Mr. X.

[16:54] - The client expresses excitement about the fairy-tale-like experience with Mr. X.

[19:08] - I reiterate the importance of clarifying and validating a man's proposal, ensuring substance and direction.

[20:43] - A man should explain and define his commitments, requests, invitations, and proposals.

[22:50] - Womanhood is expensive!

[24:47] - I offer a word of caution: Do not give too much to a man without him showing care and effort!

[26:26] - Courage and care are your friends!

Connect with Me:

• Website: https://matchmarrymate.com/
• Instagram: @matchmarrymate
• Become a Patron: https://www.patreon.com/matchmarrymate
• Book a Call: https://matchmarrymate.com/calls/ 

Literature Mentioned:

• She Memes Well by Quinta Brunson

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/forlovesake/donations

As always, at the close of each season, Jeremiah and I unite in the studio to offer you a bonus show! Welcome in, everyone! In closing Season 3, we're recapping all seven stories, and this episode is a must-listen for everyone!  

We start with the importance of emotional support beyond physical attraction, then explore attraction dynamics, advising both men and women on recognizing and valuing each other beyond the surface.

We tackle the timing of realizations and developments in men, providing insights for women to navigate relationships. Jeremiah reflects on the evolution of clarity with age, highlighting the peak of self-discovery in the 30s and “peak man” at 40. We also discuss the significance of a woman's communication tone, men choosing marriage for fatherhood, traditional gender roles, Black community progress, effective communication, and the essence of leadership in a relationship. We cap it off by exploring vulnerability and resilience in men..

Tune in, lovebugs, for blessings and valuable takeaways as we navigate the complexities of relationships with humor, honesty, and the unique perspectives of both genders. Last, I invite you to drop your truth for a chance to have your story inspire the next Secret Story episode! As always, my role is to provide educational support and guidance, not clinical or mental health advice. If you'd like to keep the podcast in production, consider making a donation. Thank you!

Time Stamps:

• [0:34] - Jeremiah and I are wrapping up Season 3 with male and married-couple perspective on this season's stories!
• [3:31] - Jeremiah argues that enduring physical chemistry is important in relationships, yet not the sole foundation; valuing women beyond appearance is crucial.
• [6:55] - Believing in internal values, Jeremiah prioritizes curiosity over external desires, establishing goals before assessing compatibility.
• [11:29] - Jeremiah points out that, with men, clarity evolves with age; in the 30s, self-discovery peaks, followed by applying lessons, solidifying one's sense of self by 35.
• [14:16] - From his current perspective, Jeremiah believes that peak manhood is around 40, with proper care in career and health.
• [16:09] - A mindful woman seeks a different response by understanding men's wiring and evoking uniqueness.
• [18:03] - Jeremiah adds that mindful communication with a softer energy brings calmness, fostering necessary value for a man.
• [21:13] - Reflecting on a scene from Waiting to Exhale, I explore how men can make women feel safe emotionally.
• [24:29] - Providing distinctive comfort and relief requires deep understanding, and mastery in this fosters an irreplaceable connection.
• [28:23] - Jeremiah argues that building a community involves seeing Black men as “the project,” molding and uplifting each other.
• [31:52] - Exploring traditional gender norms, I address inconsistencies and seek insights for bridging the gap.
• [33:19] - Tensions arise from income expectations, Jeremiah discusses; mutual support mechanisms are key.
• [36:11] - Men should address career sacrifices in traditional roles, offering some financial support to ease impact on women's careers.
• [39:14] - Emphasizing reciprocity, I discuss the importance of adapting expectations and minimizing sacrifices in relationships.
• [43:39] - Jeremiah points out how keeping things balanced in relationships means showing gratitude and being responsible with what you offer.
• [46:09] - It's important to genuinely appreciate each other to steer clear of resentment; keep those lines of communication open and aim for a high standard.
• [48:58] - I point to the importance of valuing women beyond just motherhood.
• [52:01] - Jeremiah feels that tough conversations about potential downsides of having children are crucial for making decisions in a relationship.
• [55:04] - I argue that men should be proactive in understanding their reproductive health, considering their fertility challenges.
• [58:27] - It's important for women to find the right balance between giving and receiving appreciation.
• [1:00:24] - I point out how women setting the tone involves embodying a calm energy, providing valuable information about a man's nature.
• [1:03:15] - Jeremiah argues that righteous rejection involves acknowledging current limitations, maintaining integrity, and prioritizing personal growth before commitment.
• [1:05:28] - Women's power lies in setting clear and consistent standards; maintaining consistency and reasonableness is so important.
• [1:07:39] - Jeremiah asserts that consistency earns respect and honest communication about readiness fosters understanding in relationships.
• [1:10:22] - Jeremiah argues for women to remain true to their authentic selves, as feminine power can skillfully de-escalate situations without confrontation.
• [1:15:57] - Jeremiah adds that using feminine power to connect with a man's admired qualities showcases the ability to influence subtly.
• [1:17:26] - Shifting a man's energy involves triggering protective instincts, emphasizing feminine influence for a balanced response.
• [1:20:25] - Jeremiah states that a man can hold the office of leader outside of his money.
• [1:23:39] - Jeremiah adds that part of evaluating someone starts with their ability to generate money, revealing work ethic and willingness to take initiative.
• [1:24:45] - I point out that a man's sense of leadership extends beyond financial success; it influences the well-being of women connected to him.
• [1:27:06] - Order and structure, child orientation, and vision are important aspects of a man's contribution to a family.
• [1:29:02] - I argue that humility plays a crucial role in a man's approach and readiness for a committed relationship or marriage.
• [1:31:20] - Jeremiah declares that in complementary partnerships, shared vision and humility are vital.
• [1:34:29] - Jeremiah talks about assessing humility, arguing that it involves observing reactions to new ideas.
• [1:37:34] - Evaluating, Jeremiah adds, is, in fact, essential because a leader's ability to recognize limits and seek help prevents difficult situations.
• [1:40:11] - Jeremiah refers to a celebrity couple interview that reveals the importance of support and influence in relationships.
• [1:43:41] - Men develop physical resilience through sparring, while women hone emotional resilience, which fosters mutual care.
• [1:46:45] - Jeremiah reminds us that emotional vulnerability can become a weapon during arguments.
• [1:49:07] - Listen as Jeremiah contends that a single instance of emotional misuse can have lasting impacts, urging understanding of men's vulnerability.

Connect with Me:

• Website: https://matchmarrymate.com/
• Instagram: @matchmarrymate
• Become a Patron: https://www.patreon.com/matchmarrymate
• Book a Call: https://matchmarrymate.com/calls/

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/forlovesake/donations

Welcome to our first Secret Story! We’re listening into a heartfelt story that a listener shared with me about navigating a challenging moment in her relationship. Today’s episode unfolds with an instructional lesson on relationship skills and tools, touching on the importance of emotional regulation and effective communication.

Join me as I teach the difference between skills and tools but discuss how they work hand-in-hand. This listener's journey showcases some benefits to being properly skilled and equipped for romantic, healthy relationships. As we explore the connection between emotional maturity and building a strong foundation, you'll learn some gems to create lasting intimacy. I also quote my homeboy, Dana, to add male perspective.

Happy Women’s History Month, and happy listening! I invite you to drop your truth for a chance to have your story inspire the next Secret Story episode! If you'd like to keep the podcast in production, consider making a donation. Thank you!

As always, my role is to provide educational support and guidance, not clinical or mental health advice. If you'd like to keep the podcast in production, consider making a donation. Thank you!

Time Stamps:

• [0:49] - I pay respects to Dr. Anna J. Cooper in honor of Women’s History Month.
• [4:02] - I'm sharing a Secret Story from a listener about her relationship. 
• [4:59] - Today’s story covers a listener’s use of nonviolent communication and emotional regulation.
• [7:14] - I share my excitement about stories empowering Black women in relationships.
• [8:42] - I explain the difference between a skill and a tool.
• [11:34] - The listener shares how her guy values open communication, praising her work.
• [14:16] - Dana shares his male perspective: For lasting connections, build on a solid, strong emotional foundation.

Connect with Me:

• Website: https://matchmarrymate.com/
• Instagram: @matchmarrymate
• Become a Patron: https://www.patreon.com/matchmarrymate
• Book a Call: https://matchmarrymate.com/calls/ 

Literature Mentioned:

• Nonviolent Communication by Marshall B. Rosenberg PhD

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/forlovesake/donations

Greetings, Lovebugs! Welcome to our seventh and final experience. I welcome Taccarra Davenport who shares her marriage-to-divorce story while delving into the complexities of relationships, societal pressures, and the impact of religious teachings.

Taccarra also opens up about her personal struggles, detailing moments of challenge and the emotional toll of unhealthy relationships. We discuss vulnerability, communication, and understanding each other's needs, and as we unfold her journey, Taccarra's realization of relationship patterns and her decision to file for divorce becomes a poignant moment. Separation. Tune in for an episode filled with wisdom, vulnerability, and the shared journey towards healthier relationships.

Until next time, please remember that if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me, I invite you to drop your truth! I also invite you to enroll in the Nurturing My Self-Esteem Mini-Course or grab the Feminine Identity Bundle.

Time Stamps:

• [2:23] - My guest Taccarra and I discuss divorce and its aftermath.
• [5:06] - I respect Taccarra’s balance between openness and discretion.
• [7:29] - Taccarra helps professional women redefine success and discover authentic identities.
• [9:50] - Taccarra's shares about meeting her ex-husband to divorce with lessons learned.
• [12:38] - Taccarra recounts the beginning of her relationship, starting in the military in Korea.
• [15:23] - Taccarra's transition to a LD relationship after moving to Maryland for nursing school.
• [17:56] - Taccarra discusses the logistical challenges of her relationship.
• [19:51] - Although Taccarra underwent pre-marital counseling, the identified areas for improvement ultimately led to divorce.
• [20:49] - I discuss the Church's role in addressing challenges faced by couples and the need for comprehensive ongoing support.
• [24:39] - Taccarra reflects on the Church's role in her premarital counseling, noting the need for more nuanced guidance.
• [27:18] - Taccarra still feels that she overlooked crucial flags before marriage.
• [29:03] - Taccarra shares her mother's guidance on relationships during her college years.
• [31:22] - Taccarra reveals her lack of exposure to relationships, stemming from her parents' separation and a focus on education.
• [33:29] - The timing of advice, depending on the context and setting, is very important.
• [36:13] - I delve into the psychological aspects of religious messaging.
• [38:05] - Taccarra discusses the challenges in adjusting to married life.
• [40:17] - We explore the profound impact of words and their weight in marriage.
• [43:56] - Taccarra reflects on the unintended impact of her words, realizing the significance of making her husband feel needed.
• [46:14] - Hear Taccarra expand upon her definition of need, emphasizing the significance of community.
• [48:04] - Hear about how their marriage initially improved in Germany.
• [50:59] - Despite a positive period, old patterns resurfaced.
• [52:35] - I stress the importance of journaling for reflection.
• [54:57] - Taccarra speaks on researching family history to consciously break harmful patterns.
• [56:19] - Taccarra details how, recognizing the persistent patterns, she opted against enduring more, leading to a divorce decision.
• [58:46] - We discuss how being stuck in the marital home during the divorce process brought emotional challenges and trauma.
• [1:01:18] - Navigating through the divorce process, changing names, and dealing with inquiries became overwhelming emotionally for Taccarra.
• [1:03:17] - I describe how I faced the emotional task of sorting through years of pictures.
• [1:05:04] - Taccarra discusses marriage photos, facing pandemic-induced loneliness and emotional challenges.
• [1:07:55] - Taccarra expresses enthusiastic gratitude for therapists and dating coaches.
• [1:10:45] - Taccarra identifies inconsistencies as having been the biggest red flag.
• [1:12:17] - Despite red flags, Taccarra continued, drawn by her husband's potential.
• [1:15:40] - Charismatic nature made Taccarra overlook red flags, relying on assumptions.
• [1:21:43] - Taccarra draws connections limited interaction with her father and he need for consistent male guidance and affirmation.
• [1:24:49] - Taccarra argues that being part of a community imparts wisdom, enabling one to learn from others' experiences.
• [1:27:04] - Taccarra has learned that her purpose is to create community and mentor women.
• [1:29:40] - The Church lacked teachings on dating for fun, leaving a gap between being single and marriage.
• [1:32:24] - Marriage shouldn't lack fun, and the journey to true happiness shouldn't take years!
• [1:33:14] - Taccarra enters the Sacred Sisterhood Circle with me.
• 
  

Connect with Me:

• Website: https://matchmarrymate.com/
• Instagram: @matchmarrymate
• Become a Patron: https://www.patreon.com/matchmarrymate
• Book a Call: https://matchmarrymate.com/calls/ 

Connect with Taccarra:

• Her Website
• Her Instagram
• Her Podcast 
• Her Book: A Letter to My Sister

Literature & Links Mentioned

• Her Inevitable Divorce Blog Post {+ Episode Guide}
• 13: I Feel My Power

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/forlovesake/donations

Happy Valentine’s Day, Lovebugs! Let’s embrace our Lover-Girl Archetypes with some romantic first-date GONE RIGHT energy. Who else to bring us these vibes but one of my favorite lover-girl clients, Laurie. Then, I activate my Sage Archetype to share practicality, strategy, and guidance. This date isn't just about the lovey-dovey stuff, though. It involves repair and redemption–a pair of relationship skills necessary for strong connections and healthy relationships. We'll also explore a pre-date ritual, emphasizing mutual effort in the dating process.

I share relationship insight about not jumping to conclusions, listening to your intuition, and giving a man a fair chance. We dissect the details, stressing the importance of holding a man to his word and practicing empathy and understanding. It's not just about grand gestures; it's about setting the stage for a meaningful and responsible connection. Stay tuned for insights into building smarter, safer, and happier romantic connections with Laurie and her date, Mr. Banana. 

If you have a Secret Story you want to share with me, I invite you to drop your truth for the next Secret Story episode!

Time Stamps:

• [1:02] - Laurie will be recounting a dreamy date with a twist: a story of repair and redemption.
• [5:03] - I set the stage for Laurie's romantic date, repair work, and pre-date energy.
• [8:32] - I share some important housekeeping notes before diving into Laurie's story.
• [10:12] - Laurie details her date, revealing a change in plans, romantic gestures, and meaningful conversation.
• [14:44] - Mr. Banana's date involves a gentle approach, exploring faith, family dynamics, and romantic energy.
• [18:03] - I intervene, advising Laurie not to settle but to balance romance while ensuring a meaningful connection.
• [19:42] - Laurie explains why she gave Mr. Banana a chance, expressing openness and acknowledging personal growth.
• [21:56] - I offer guidance in negotiating and setting terms.
• [24:47] - Questions are raised about Mr. Banana's change in plans and delivering on commitments.
• [26:55] - Noting the importance of giving chances, I explore the need for answers and fair evaluations.
• [29:31] - I acknowledge past experiences, encouraging fair judgment and giving each man a chance to prove himself.
• [31:47] - I advise Laurie to listen to her intuition and check assumptions, and I offer guidance on the redemption process.
• [35:09] - Teaching pre-date rituals, I teach intentional conversations, negotiations, and agreements.
• [38:31] - I close on the power of repair, getting what you want, and maintaining feminine wisdom.

Connect with Me:

• Website: https://matchmarrymate.com/
• Instagram: @matchmarrymate
• Become a Patron: https://www.patreon.com/matchmarrymate
• Book a Call: https://matchmarrymate.com/calls/

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/forlovesake/donations

Greetings, Lovebugs! Welcome to our sixth experience. I welcome Shaunice, whom you may remember from season 2, back to the show today! This time, she is joined by her husband Rashad to share an update on their married life and insights into Muslim marriage. Shaunice and I kickoff the episode with her journey of learning and applying vulnerability and femininity skills in her relationship, which has now evolved into a marriage with Rashad.

We also discuss the value of proactive efforts in marriage and prevention over intervention. Shaunice shares the significance of speaking to a partner with respect and inspiration rather than defeating or insulting behavior. The conversation underscores the role of women and wives in inspiring their partners and the positive outcomes that arise when approaching relationships with an understanding of each other's needs. Then, Rashad joins us to offer a male perspective on marriage and his experience in witnessing Shaunice undergo relationship and marriage coaching. 

Until next time, please remember that if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me, I invite you to drop your truth! I also invite you to enroll in the Nurturing My Self-Esteem Mini-Course or grab the Feminine Identity Bundle.

Time Stamps:

• [3:07] - Shaunice returns!
• ​​[6:16] - This episode includes the male perspective on relationships and marriage.
• [9:00] - I highlight the power of taking a pause and leaning into femininity when communicating.
• [11:35] - Shaunice shares her favorite story involving navigating tense situations.
• [13:08] - I cover expressing needs and desires to a caring partner without penalizing them.
• [15:07] - I praise women's power to positively influence and maintain intimacy.
• [17:52] - Trust in the dynamic of masculine and feminine energies in relationships is important.
• [19:42] - Marriage assumes adopting certain ideals, traditions, customs, and family dynamics.
• [21:37] - Shaunice shares how being accepted as a daughter-in-law mattered so much to her.
• [22:38] - I relate to Shaunice with a story about my dmother-in-love.
• [24:28] - How does Shaunice feel about being a wife?
• [26:27] - Learn how Shaunice is actively shaping her marriage.
• [29:51] - Shaunice highlights the distinct aspects of living as Muslims, embracing roles and mutual support in marriage.
• [31:04] - I express appreciation for Shaunice's faith.
• [34:06] - Shaunice shares her parenting approach and how she addressed her daughters' concerns amid life changes.
• [36:54] - Shaunice enters the Sacred Sisterhood Circle with me.
• [38:28] - I introduce Rashad to the show.
• [39:54] - Rashad identifies open-mindedness, kindness, and love for Black people as important traits in a wife.
• [40:10] - I interject with the first lesson: How cultural pride can foster genuine connection.
• [41:19] - How did Shaunice measure up to what Rashad wants in a wife?
• [42:06] - I interject with the second lesson: How important listening is inside romantic relationships.
• [44:41] - Rashad discusses his initial concerns and how to navigate friction.
• [47:29] - I interject with the third lesson: How attitude and energy is received by a man.
• [51:23] - I reflect on my impressions of Rashad when I first met him, and he, too, describes his initial impressions of me.
• [53:07] - I interject with the fourth lesson: How men respond to support in relationships.
• [56:27] - Learn about the structured partnership in Muslim marriage.
• [1:00:32] - Rashad acknowledges the positive shifts in his wife's demeanor and emotional processing through her relationship and marriage coaching.
• [1:02:33] - I interject with the fifth lesson: The value of softness and femininity independent of external influences.
• [1:07:28] - How is married life for Rashad?
• [1:08:53] - I appreciate the significance of starting a marriage on a solid foundation.
• [1:11:22] - Rashad humorously reflects on the consummation act, relating to Islamic principles.
• [1:14:36] - Rashad joins the Brother-Sister Circle with me. 

Connect with Me:

• Website: https://matchmarrymate.com/
• Instagram: @matchmarrymate
• Become a Patron: https://www.patreon.com/matchmarrymate
• Book a Call: https://matchmarrymate.com/calls/ 

Literature & Links Mentioned

• Their New Marriage Blog Post {+ Episode Guide}

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/forlovesake/donations

Greetings, Lovebugs! Welcome to our fifth experience. I am joined by Laurie. a current Match Marry Mate™ client, who is sharing her healing journey with us today. We have a sweet and tender conversation about healing and growth, unveiling stories of self-discovery, family dynamics, and the intricacies of dating.

Laurie shares about growing up in a Kenyan household and draws comparisons between gender norms in Kenya and America, her painful realization of being labeled the "pump and dump" girl, and her inspiring path of embracing femininity and healing her relationship with her mother.

Laurie’s authenticity is a beacon, and as the conversation reaches its emotional peak, stay tuned because she and I share a genuine, heartfelt moment. In our Sacred Sistah Circle, Laurie's voice takes a sober tone, so put your extra listening ears on for a moving conclusion.

Until next time, please remember that if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me, I invite you to drop your truth! I also invite you to enroll in the Nurturing My Self-Esteem Mini-Course or grab the Feminine Identity Bundle.

Time Stamps:

• [3:04] - I am with the one and only Laurie!
• [5:41] - Laurie shares how she discovered me through a mutual friend.
• [7:21] - Laurie reveals what prompted her to join Match Marry Mate™.
• [9:20] - Hear Laurie discuss her Kenyan upbringing.
• [12:30] - Laurie describes the male-driven dating culture where women assume passivity.
• [16:33] - Laurie notes the difference in social interactions between Kenya and the U.S.
• [19:59] - Laurie reflects on some of her dating challenges.
• [21:12] - Laurie discusses her experiences with dating Black men and her realization about being the "pump and dump" girl.
• [24:01] - I helped Laurie redefine her role as an emotional hospital, prompting self-reflection through a movie assignment.
• [25:32] - Laurie reflects on investing emotional currency in a man for over two years, realizing the need for boundaries.
• [28:55] - Laurie reflects on a relationship she calls sad and comical, involving minimal dates and unequal emotional investment.
• [31:07] - Laurie likens a troubled relationship to a non-healing wound, caused by constant aggravation and avoidance.
• [34:01] - Laurie acknowledges a strained relationship with her mom, opting for coping mechanisms instead of healing.
• [35:55] - I explain an exercise in ranking universal desires, highlighting the importance of addressing family issues.
• [38:51] - Laurie reflects on her mother's challenges, understanding her pain.
• [41:02] - Hear about Laurie's journey of mending the strained relationship with her mom.
• [45:41] - I point out the importance of connecting with one's maternal lineage for a fulfilling womanhood experience.
• [48:04] - I commend Laurie's remarkable transformation in nine months.
• [50:45] - Laurie shares her balance masculine and feminine energies, recognizing learned and inherent qualities.
• [52:55] - Laurie embraces her feminine wisdom, intuition, and visualization.
• [54:10] - I emphasize the importance of wisdom in knowing when to embrace masculine and feminine energies.
• [56:59] - Laurie finds clarity and reconciliation in the feminine and masculine archetypes, embracing her lovergirl and huntress.
• [59:19] - Laurie enters the Sacred Sisterhood Circle with me. 

Connect with Me:

• Website: https://matchmarrymate.com/
• Instagram: @matchmarrymate
• Become a Patron: https://www.patreon.com/matchmarrymate
• Book a Call: https://matchmarrymate.com/calls/ 

Literature & Links Mentioned

• Her Healing Journey Blog Post {+ Episode Guide}
• Female Archetypes 

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/forlovesake/donations

Welcome to another episode of season 3, lovebirds! I have a great conversation in store for you today, as I am joined by Timka, a current Match Marry Mate™ client, and we are engaging in a conversation centered around the transformative power that extends beyond her dating experiences, although she will be sharing the details of that aspect today. Over the past year, I've witnessed Timka undergo a profound shift in her mindset, dedication to personal growth, self-reflection, reshaping of her social circles, and the establishment of deep connections and intimacy with a male companion.

From honing personal, communication, and relationship skills, she has embraced a holistic transformation, evolving into the woman she is today. Timka candidly discusses her dating journey, the valuable lessons she learned, and how she gracefully bid farewell to the "Mr. Nice Guy" archetype (in a positive way). You'll hear her narrate her journey of breaking free from people-pleasing tendencies and acquiring the ability to engage in assertive conversations. Timka also shares real-life instances, offering a play-by-play of her interactions and communication with the last man she dated.

Our conversation delves into topics such as emotional regulation, the dynamics of masculine and feminine partnerships, navigating relationships with men in various stages of development, and the art of righteous rejection. Join us for an insightful exploration into the world of personal growth and dating transformation with Timka, and don't forget - if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me, I invite you to drop your truth for the next Secret Story episode!

Time Stamps:

• [2:51] - I am joined today by Timka, a client whose transformative journey is inspiring!
• [6:51] - Timka shares pivotal moments that sparked self-realization.
• [9:48] - Hear Timka detail entering the dating scene, facing challenges, and reflecting on lessons learned.
• [11:34] - Timka details her dating experience that led to her discovering self-worth.
• [14:42] - Timka embraced being single, later seeking guidance from me for transformative dating experiences.
• [17:17] - I commend Timka for her accountability for past mistakes in relationships and value her resilience.
• [19:09] - Timka acknowledges the challenge of being comfortable that not everyone will like her.
• [21:03] - Timka tells the importance of recognizing misalignments and asking important questions when dating.
• [23:28] - I agree, focusing on effective communication, particularly listening.
• [26:22] - Timka likens herself to a butterfly, as she has matured and grown in her dating journey.
• [28:51] - I highlight women's emotional intelligence as a superpower but warn immediate reactions.
• [31:19] - Don't let your superpower be your kryptonite!
• [32:59] - Timka shares explains importance of giving men space to process emotions without taking it personally.
• [35:39] - Timka asserts her boundaries, navigates confrontations with grace, and discovers the power of her femininity.
• [38:11] - Timka describes a mature and open relationship with communication, understanding, and the potential for a future connection.
• [39:41] - Femininity requires a lot of energy!
• [41:45] - I applaud Timka for understanding men as humans, balancing energies, and fostering connection and intimacy in relationships.
• [44:38] - Hear Timka give a specific example of how she demonstrates self-love by showing up for herself.
• [48:38] - Learn why Timka values silence for personal processing.
• [50:00] - I highlight Timka's skill in resolving conflicts.
• [53:05] - Timka shares an incident where she handled disagreement maturely.
• [55:34] - Patience and understanding in gaining intimacy is powerful, as is navigating male nature.
• [57:47] - I teach on a man's capacity to receive feminine energy and how to position oneself wisely in a relationship.
• [59:19] - I discuss the importance of defining and upholding personal standards and femininity, independent of a man's role.
• [1:01:14] - Timka appreciates her friend for having recognized that he had self-discovery and growth to do.
• [1:04:03] - I agree, applauding him for his honesty in recognizing his development needs and valuing Timka's space and time.
• [1:07:05] - Timka joins me in the Sacred Sisterhood Circle.

Connect with Me:

• Website: https://matchmarrymate.com/
• Instagram: @matchmarrymate
• Become a Patron: https://www.patreon.com/matchmarrymate
• Book a Call: https://matchmarrymate.com/calls/ 

Links & Literature Mentioned:

• Her Relationship Gems Episode Guide
• His Dating Pivot
• My Black Marriage Research 
• Client Story #1
• Masculine Archetypes
• Bids for Connection

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/forlovesake/donations

Greetings, Lovebugs! Welcome to our third experience. I am back in the studio to interview Kaity Rodriguez with an update on her 100 Dates in Houston Blog Series. We discuss Dates 7-10 from her blog and her unexpected dating dry spell that brought a range of emotions that Kaity is ready to share.

We walk through her dating experience with Mr. Hairline and zoom in on a beautiful exchange around the topic of women being valued for their individuality and not just their potential motherhood. We touch on Kaity's memorable "Waiting to Exhale" moment and the balance between holding onto a dead situation and bailing out too quickly.

Join us as we explore Kaity's challenge of discerning genuine interest from a desire to fill a slot. We reflect, we laugh, and uncover the nuanced dynamics that define modern dating, with shared struggles, empowering moments, and insightful lessons!

Until next time, please remember that if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me, I invite you to drop your truth! I also invite you to enroll in the Nurturing My Self-Esteem Mini-Course or grab the Feminine Identity Bundle.

Time Stamps:

• [4:03] - Kaity joins me today, sharing updates on her 100 Dates in Houston.
• [10:12] - I discuss the support prompt from date number seven.
• [12:20] - I explore the intersection of womanhood and gender roles.
• [14:19] - Kaity explains how she took initiative and broke tradition.
• [17:16] - Kaity challenges traditional passivity in dating.
• [20:55] - It's important for women marrying later to be valued beyond just potential motherhood.
• [23:43] - Kaity finds relief in communication.
• [26:34] - Kaity reflects on her date having admitted to seeing other women.
• [27:53] - How does one navigate the balance between avoiding wasted time and giving someone a chance?
• [30:16] - Balancing conflicting feelings, Kaity finds solace in patiently observing and avoiding hasty judgments and decisions.
• [32:23] - I reflect on “He's Just Not That Into You,” contrasting hope and disappointment.
• [34:24] - Kaity resists old habits, embracing discomfort, and adopts a "wait and see" approach.
• [36:40] - In the context of women's empowerment, I explore the impact of dating behaviors on others' feelings.
• [39:48] - Kaity highlights the significance of timely communication for maintaining a meaningful connection.
• [41:23] - I discuss managing expectations around response times and the role of open communication.
• [43:56] - Hear an example involving missed with my husband, highlighting differing expectations on responsiveness.
• [45:20] - Kaity emphasizes the importance of responsive communication, reflecting individual needs for connection.
• [50:59] - Kaity notes the importance of maintaining excitement and depth in communication.
• [53:20] - Kaity reflects on two emotional conversations, noting the challenge of balancing self-assertion and grace in mature communication.
• [56:13] - Kaity's journey hits a milestone in her empowerment and self-commitment.
• [1:02:39] - Kaity faced disappointment when attempts to deepen the connection fell flat.
• [1:05:34] - Kaity had to reassess the connection's viability due to frequent dissatisfaction with communication efforts.
• [1:07:05] - Kaity navigates confusion in Mr. Hairline's attachment style, identifying it as a fearful-avoidant pattern.
• [1:09:37] - Kaity values consistency in text responsiveness, acknowledging her needs without deeming them needy.
• [1:11:11] - Seasons come and go, and Kaity is embracing the end of a dating season.
• [1:14:45] - Female listeners are advised to view relationship challenges as passing moments.
• [1:16:07] - I close by emphasizing navigating challenges together, avoiding person-centered blame, and highlighting conflict resolution's role in building intimacy.

Connect with Me:

Website: https://matchmarrymate.com/

Instagram: @matchmarrymate

Become a Patron: https://www.patreon.com/matchmarrymate

Book a Call: https://matchmarrymate.com/calls/ 

Literature & Links Mentioned

Her Dating Dry Spell Blog Post {+ Episode Guide}

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/forlovesake/donations

Greetings, Lovebugs! Welcome to our second experience. Come with me as I share the first part of my latest research project – an exploration focused on education, economics, and marriageability of Black boys and men. While the podcast primarily caters to Black women, the research holds greater significance for the entire Black community, and I explore the debt America owes Black Americans.

The discussion navigates the complexities of understanding and improving conditions for Black men and boys as I call attention to the debts they have inherited and how it has impacted Black Love and the Black Family. I also unravel historic evidence, spotlight improvements, and ambitiously work towards a self-sufficient future for Black communities.

Until next time, please remember that if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me, I invite you to drop your truth! I also invite you to enroll in the Nurturing My Self-Esteem Mini-Course or grab the Feminine Identity Bundle.

Correction: The author is not Tracey Chapman, but Audrey B. Chapman. 

Time Stamps:

• [4:04] - Gain some insights on academic research.
• [6:18] - America should dissolve its oppressive barriers against Black boys and men.
• [9:24] - I advocate for accessible research for all.
• [12:43] - Much research needs to be adapted for Black people.
• [15:11] - I desire for my research communication to be comprehensible for all.
• [18:26] - My line of research studies how education and economics impact the marital status of Black men.
• [20:14] - My research especially targets debts in education, economics, and marriage for Black boys and men.
• [23:47] - I use models and address the lasting effects of racism.
• [26:24] - I connect financial language, diverse models, and cultural insights.
• [28:09] - I explain how my research also examines the educational, economic, and marital debts owed to Black men to improve their societal standing.
• [30:30] - I directly address Black mothers, urging them to raise their sons to contribute meaningfully to society.
• [32:28] - Black fathers, your sons need you!
• [34:12] - I move into the subject of debt owed to Black boys.
• [37:11] - I borrow the word “rift” to depict racial discord.
• [40:15] - I call Black men to the front again.
• [41:50] - I recommend a few helpful resources regarding this topic.
• ​​[44:37] - I address intergenerational cycles.
• [48:02] - My research proposes a collective approach.
• [51:44] - Marriage among less-educated Black Americans may face increased stress due to financial instability and strain.
• [54:20] - Some progress connects to acknowledging men's need to earn, supporting families, before discussing marital structures.
• [56:25] - Securing a high school diploma benefits Black men.
• [1:02:34] - I encourage young Black women to seek guidance on education, careers, and relationships.
• [1:05:02] - Educational injustices affect Black men, women, and children, ultimately shaping conflicting beliefs on marriage and masculinity.
• [1:06:59] - I close by expressing appreciation for strong Black marriages, urging listeners to actively contribute to family and community healing.

Connect with Me:

• Website: https://matchmarrymate.com/
• Instagram: @matchmarrymate
• Become a Patron: https://www.patreon.com/matchmarrymate
• Book a Call: https://matchmarrymate.com/calls/ 

Literature & Links Mentioned

• My Black Marriage Research Blog Post {+ Episode Guide}
• His Dating Pivot Blog Post
• Marriage As A Cultural Norm Podcast Episode 
• Of Boys & Men by Richard Reeves
• Why I Love Black Women by Michael Eric Dyson
• The Spirit of a Man by Iyanla Vanzant

Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/forlovesake/donations