Do you find yourself living in a marriage full of unspoken tension? You’re polite and all, but there’s no honest sharing or compassion? In this final program of the series, Chip shares a tool that walks you step-by-step, through a communication process that’ll free you from the past, free you from the guilt, and free you from the history that’s holding your relationship hostage.

Three major reasons we have shame:

1. A theological reason – we ALL have shame.
2. Shame from things DONE to us.
3. Shame of things that we DO.

Three natural responses:

1. To HIDE.
2. To NUMB the pain.
3. To COMPENSATE.

John 21:1-19

Principles:

1. Jesus MEETS us where we are.
2. Jesus gently DEMANDS that we face the truth about ourselves.
3. Jesus AFFIRMS our value and our worthiness by commissioning us to service.

Practical implications:

1. You can’t forgive your mate until you have RECEIVED both forgiveness and restoration. -Ephesians 4:32
2. EXPERIENCE God’s forgiveness and restoration.
3. Freely GIVE what you have received.

Tools for transformation:

D – DEFINE the issue clearly.

E – ENTER the pain and hurt.

F – Ask for FORGIVENESS.

U – UNDERSTAND the process.

• Phase 1: Forgive
• Phase 2: Forgiving
• Phase 3: Forgiven

S – SET things right between you.

• Own your responsibility
• Confess: “I was wrong.”
• Ask: “Will you forgive me?”
• Answer: “Yes, I forgive you.”

E – ESTABLISH a specific game plan to move forward.

Broadcast Resource

• Download MP3
• Message Notes

Additional Resource Mentions

• I Choose Love Book

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