GDLC Audio

For the most part, your normal, average person would agree that stealing is out of bounds for anyone, but especially for a Christian. So, if you told your Christian friends that you had broken into your neighbor’s house and taken your neighbor’s possessions, they’d never invite you over again and wonder if you were saved. If you told your Christian friends that you had no problem stealing cars, they’d keep a tight reign on their keys and never let you near their vehicles...and again, wonder if you are saved. But if you told them you leave work an hour and a half early twice a week and yet clock in for the full amount of hours, they wouldn’t think anything of it. If you told them that you cheated on your taxes so that you got a refund instead of paying more tax, they’d wouldn’t blink an eye. But I think you know...for the Christian...stealing big or stealing small...it’s still stealing, and as such, is contrary to God’s will for our lives. We’ll remember today then that “Honesty is the Best Policy” because in fact, honesty is God’s policy!

4. Trusted
The Art of Civility really comes down to the valuing of others over and above the valuing of our own opinions as we interact with them. If we engage in conversation with the goal to win, be right, be heard and get our point across, then in many ways we have already lost. We have lost the Art of Civility and traded it for pride of an opinion. We want people to feel heard, understood, respected and trusted with who they are and what they have to say. When someone does not feel one of these things, it can lead to them feeling HURT. Jesus came into our lives to set us free from the ways of this world and to empower us to manifest His Kingdom in the midst of this world.

The final piece of The Art of Civility is the feeling of being trusted. When others share with us their feelings, views or ideas they are entrusting us with a piece of themselves and this leads to a greater trust between two people. For Christians, trust starts with the amazing reality that God can always be trusted. God is perfected trust and will always come through for His people.

Isaiah 26:3-4 spoke to this truth when he said: “you keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock.” Then again scripture speaks to this in Proverbs 3:5-6: “trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths.”

As we trust in God, He will empower us to be trustworthy people to others. We know we cannot control others and need God’s wisdom when it comes to who we entrust ourselves to. However, when it comes to ourselves, here are nine tips to help us become a more trustworthy person.

1. Always keep your commitment in word and deed
2. Be honest
3. Be transparent
4. Be on time
5. Keep confidences
6. Don’t gossip
7. Apologize when needed
8. Be predictable with a loving attitude
9. Set the tone for those around you

Your attitude and consistency can cause a ripple effect to others and we want to make sure that the ripple effect is positive. As Christians we have been called to be the leaders of civility in this world. Romans 12:18 says: “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.”

I pray this study has raised awareness of how vital civility is for the well-being of our families, our church, our city, our nation and our world. May we all take it upon ourselves to live out of the peace that we have so graciously been baptized into.

We live in a world where vitriolic rhetoric is the norm, not the exception. It’s disturbingly sad the way so many in our world speak hatefully about other people. Often, even worse, what they are saying is at the very least a half-truth if not an outright lie. Unfortunately, this isn’t some benign thing that happens between people half a world away, it also happens between people who are so-called friends. Furthermore, and far more troubling, it sometimes comes from the mouths and the pens and the keyboards of Christians. Gossip abounds. Bad-mouthing is rampant. Ugly hateful-speech is spewed. But God calls us to higher living, better living, kinder living...even towards our “enemies” by the way. God calls us to support and uplift and speak well...to speak kindly of everyone around us but especially our fellow Christians. Luther wrote “explain everything in the kindest way” and that’s exactly what the Lord Jesus calls us to do. In a world that is prone to trash-talking-bad-mouths, we will be reminded today that we are always called to deliver “Kind Speech”.

We live in a world where vitriolic rhetoric is the norm, not the exception. It’s disturbingly sad the way so many in our world speak hatefully about other people. Often, even worse, what they are saying is at the very least a half-truth if not an outright lie. Unfortunately, this isn’t some benign thing that happens between people half a world away, it also happens between people who are so-called friends. Furthermore, and far more troubling, it sometimes comes from the mouths and the pens and the keyboards of Christians. Gossip abounds. Bad-mouthing is rampant. Ugly hateful-speech is spewed. But God calls us to higher living, better living, kinder living...even towards our “enemies” by the way. God calls us to support and uplift and speak well...to speak kindly of everyone around us but especially our fellow Christians. Luther wrote “explain everything in the kindest way” and that’s exactly what the Lord Jesus calls us to do. In a world that is prone to trash-talking-bad-mouths, we will be reminded today that we are always called to deliver “Kind Speech”.

3. Respected
“If people respect you, respect them back, if they disrespect, you respect them back. They represent their ideology, you represent yours.” Mohammad Zeyara

We all have a need to be respected, to be taken seriously, to feel relevant, to be considered worthy, to be noticed, to be valued. Along with these is the need we all have to sense our own identities. Our identity is how we define who we are in the world. A way that this happens is in the way that others acknowledge and treat us. We have all heard stories of how people have used this power to discourage or belittle another person. As humanity, we also have the ability to empower others as we make them feel important and have good reason for being in our lives. In The Art of Civility, common respect for others is a key piece in being able to treat others with the worth and dignity they deserve.

The opposite of respect is contempt, which is a key feeling that is present in the midst of almost all relational struggles. Showing contempt to anyone is a deep insult and will often lead to deep feelings of frustration, unhappiness, hurt feelings, dismissal and even anger. The feeling of disrespect is often connected to a feeling of worth. As Christians, we start from a standpoint of our shared identity and worth in Christ.

Look at this piece of scripture from Galatians 2:20: “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.”

As Christians our identity and worth was spoken for when Jesus came and gave up His life for ours. He showed us our worth in His sacrifice on the cross and gave us our identity in His resurrection from the grave. Romans 8:31 says: “What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?”
Notice that Paul is saying that since we have been heard by God, understood by God and respected by God, than what person in this whole world could give us a greater feeling of worth or respect and, since Jesus has treated us all this way, than who do we have the right to be against?

Jesus said in Matthew 7:12: “So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.” I am in no way saying that this is an easy thing to do in our everyday lives and I think Jesus meant it to be that way. If it was easy than we might be led to think we can do this on our own power apart from God, but since it is so difficult, we need a wisdom, strength and love that is greater than our own. It starts with a heart transformed by the Gospel and ends with that heart giving the love and respect of God away to others. We don’t want anyone to feel HURT, so we seek to Hear them, Understand them, Respect them and Trust them.

Points to Ponder:
1. Describe a time in your life when you felt respected for just being yourself.
2. What does it mean to you that “God is for you?”
3. What help do you need from God as you move toward respecting others in the world?