GDLC Audio

One of the greatest gifts God has given us is found in the most intimate of emotional and physical connection given to a husband and wife. Because it’s one of God’s greatest gifts to us, it becomes one of satan’s sharpest weapons against us. The old evil foe uses our God-given desire for one another in the worst of ways and destroys marriages, families and lives in the process. When it comes to our sexuality then, how do we defeat satan, push this world away, and live for Jesus with all of our heart, mind, soul and strength? Let’s get at that today as we discuss “Purity in an Impure World”.

One of the greatest gifts God has given us is found in the most intimate of emotional and physical connection given to a husband and wife. Because it’s one of God’s greatest gifts to us, it becomes one of satan’s sharpest weapons against us. The old evil foe uses our God-given desire for one another in the worst of ways and destroys marriages, families and lives in the process. When it comes to our sexuality then, how do we defeat satan, push this world away, and live for Jesus with all of our heart, mind, soul and strength? Let’s get at that today as we discuss “Purity in an Impure World”.

2 {UNDERSTOOD}
“Please understand and love me” ~ Ernest Hemingway

One of our deepest longings, deeper than we even perhaps recognize day-to-day, is the desire to have other people understand aspects of how we are feeling. We don’t want others necessarily to agree with all our feelings, but what we crave is that they at least validate them. This is why people will feel hurt when they do not feel they are being understood or that someone doesn’t care to find out. Ernest Hemingway correctly connected the dots that an extension of love is the motivation to understand where someone else is coming from. As we talk through The Art of Civility, there is no replacement to the art of listening with the intention to better understand the person who is sharing.

Psalm 139:1-6: “O LORD, you have searched me and known me! You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O Lord, you know it altogether, you hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it.”

As Christians we start with the reality that God KNOWS everything about us. We are completely seen and understood by our God at all times. Some points to ponder:

1. What thoughts/feelings come up within you as you read this portion of Psalm 139?
2. What does it mean for you to be understood by someone else?
3. What does it look like to seek to understand someone else?
4. What things get in the way of this process happening?

Every person is the sum total of many life experiences. From the way they were raised, to who influenced them in their life, choices they have made, organizations they have been a part of and countless other things that have made them into the person they are today. The Art of Civility is the ability to listen to another person without writing them off, dismissing them, or not hearing them because they hold to differing opinions than we do. We don’t have to agree with everything a person stands for, but that doesn’t mean we can’t seek to understand them for the unique creation of God that they are.

When we are small, we are prone to grab at control in our lives by saying that word “Mine” and doing so forcefully. As we get older...we may not say it...but the sentiment is still in our heart...“Mine!” Today, as we look at the very important Fifth Commandment, we’re reminded that actually nothing is “Mine!” but everything, including my very life, belongs to God. To be sure, it has been given to us...more like loaned to us...but it nonetheless belongs to the God who “knit us together in our mother’s womb”. Therefore, if all life comes from and therefore belongs to God...and it does...it’s then not ours to take, ever. We cannot take our own life...nor anyone else’s. Today we’ll remember that life is precious to be sure, but we’ll remember that this is true because “He Owns Us”.

When we are small, we are prone to grab at control in our lives by saying that word “Mine” and doing so forcefully. As we get older...we may not say it...but the sentiment is still in our heart...“Mine!” Today, as we look at the very important Fifth Commandment, we’re reminded that actually nothing is “Mine!” but everything, including my very life, belongs to God. To be sure, it has been given to us...more like loaned to us...but it nonetheless belongs to the God who “knit us together in our mother’s womb”. Therefore, if all life comes from and therefore belongs to God...and it does...it’s then not ours to take, ever. We cannot take our own life...nor anyone else’s. Today we’ll remember that life is precious to be sure, but we’ll remember that this is true because “He Owns Us”.

1 {HEARD}
“The desire to be heard is as deeply seeded as the desire to be loved. For some people, it doesn’t matter who’s on the other end.” ~ David Levithan

“We all like to think that, despite our position in life, we are a ‘somebody’ that matters. We may not be a politician, a celebrity, an academic, etc., but we are here and involved in the world around us and we want desperately to belong. We have a voice and an opinion and crave to be taken seriously. We all want the very same thing…to be heard, to feel like our views matter…that we matter.“

The above paragraph was written by an online writer who had felt he was not being heard on certain social matters. He wasn’t desiring that his opinions be made a reality, but simply that his opinions would be heard and thought about.

As Christians, The Art of Civility starts with the invitation that God has given to us to come and talk to Him directly. Listen to this scripture from Jeremiah 33:23: “Thus says the Lord who made the earth, the Lord who formed it to establish it-the Lord is His name. Call to me and I will answer you and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.”

What an incredible invitation that God has given to all of us! That at any time, in any place, in any circumstance, God desires to hear us. Take a few more moments to let this incredible truth wash over you. The Lord who made the earth, who formed and established it, is inviting you to come and share whatever is going on in your life. The Lord who has the power to breathe stars, create planets, and who even formed your DNA is the same God who has made you a promise that you will always be heard. WOW!

Prayer is a two-way street where we communicate to God and God also is communicating with us. He has promised to not just listen but also to tell us great and hidden things that we would not know on our own, discover on the internet, or hear from a friend. As Christians, we always want to be starting with prayer and allowing that to then transcend into our other relationships as we seek to hear those around us.

The Art of Civility really starts with the art of listening, as we listen not just to respond, but in order that we might more fully understand the person we are speaking with. Remembering that our goal is not to win a conversation, change someone else’s opinion, or defend our territory, but rather to allow someone else the space where they will be heard with a heart of love. Psalm 103:8 says, “The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.” May we take the listening ear that God gives to us and extend that to others in this world with a heart that is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in love…just like our amazing God.

Points to Ponder:
1. Describe a time when you felt you were really listened to and how that make you feel.
2. What things get in the way of really listening to others?
3. How can you improve your listening skills with people in your own life today?