Gen Ex

There are just some people you don’t want to fuck (with). In a world of seemingly endless choices, it’s good to have an idea of your own personal dealbreakers. Duckie even has a list! This episode focuses on spotting deal breakers early (before you swipe or during the first date) so you don’t go dick blind, or catch feelings for someone who really isn’t a good match for you. 

Show note links:

We’re Not Really Strangers game

Spotify Playlists - to make a mixtape for your crush

“I Can’t Wait” by Nu Shooz (Andie’s fav throwback track to hear while getting ready for a date)

With vaccines rolling out, vacations and swapping spit with hotties are back! A sexcation is defined as a vacation devoted entirely to sex. In this episode Duckie dishes about his much-anticipated sexcation, Andie finds joy in a sexless trip and processes a relationship downshift. We also give tips about how to have a great sexcation with your partner or with someone you just met. And we share our fav condom and answer a listener's question about dating right after a divorce. 

Dating apps are a double-edged sword. Apps give us nearly endless choices of potential new dates, but they also make us more picky and restless thinking the grass is greener on the other side. Compulsively swiping for something better means you might forget to water the grass you’re on. Andie and Duckie explore the ethics of juggling a ton of possible partners, tips for avoiding being overwhelmed and burnout, and managing the anxiety of wondering if someone better might be one swipe away? Plus, we review Tinder and give tips for making the ultimate thirst trap.

Links to stuff we mentioned:

Duckie and Andie talk about the pluses and minuses of sex as middle-aged Gen Xers. Do you have a “Last Fuckable Day”? What age range should you date? Should you try to make yourself look younger? And why do men look so bad now? We also review the dating app Clover and give some unsolicited advice about how to spot fakes, scammers, and bots on dating apps.

Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM) is having a moment. Thanks to the prevalence of dating apps and pandemic doom-scrolling it may feel like everyone is dating a dozen people at once. Is monogamy over? If you’re not polyamorous, everyone suddenly being into ENM can be uncomfortable and vexing but perhaps “Playing The Field” isn’t such a new concept? Andie (who is polyamorous) and Duckie (who is monogamish) offer guidelines on when and how to have a conversation about your dating situation with potential romantic partners. This week’s product review also includes unconventional advice about what you should have in your bedside drawer if you like sleeping with women. 

Books mentioned in this episode:

Do you have to be alone to heal? Some say the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else. Others warn that if you’re always distracting yourself with a new relationship, you never really grow or heal from the last relationship. What if you’re polyamorous and grieving one relationship while enjoying another? Andie and Duckie explore the latest rules for getting over a significant relationship, review the Feeld dating app, and talk about what kind of person you should date after a significant relationship ends. 

In the 80s and 90s, threesomes were whispered about as the stuff of fantasy and legend. Now it seems as if everyone has threesomes. It’s hard enough to get one person, now you gotta get two? If you’re new to threesomes, it can seem impossible to pull off. How do you ask for a threesome or find the right partners if you’re single? Andie and Duckie dive into how to navigate the tantalizing threesome waters and answer all your burning Qs: what if my partner is more attracted to the other person? What if I can’t perform? How can I be sure everyone will feel included? We also review OKCupid and talk about how to take dic pics.

Dating during a pandemic is daunting! The world is slowly getting vaccinated, but we’re still a long way from “normal dating” so in this Very Special Episode we unpack all the challenges and new safety protocols for COVID-safe booty calls and navigating the relationship pressure cooker of an ongoing geopolitical shit-show. We also review the Plenty of Fish dating app and offer an unusual idea for outdoor dating. 

Sex with a new person can be exhilarating but also bring up a ton of anxiety—especially after divorce or a long-term relationship. Navigating all of the weirdness that comes from performance anxiety, body issues, and the pressure to “stick the landing” ie. achieve orgasm for all parties. We also review the dating app HER (for femmes only!) and offer advice about grooming and priming your body for sexy fun.

Two divorced Gen X pals decide to unpack their love lives with a podcast about dating and relationships. In our origin episode, we share why we’ve started this podcast and dish about how much dating has changed since our earlier single years back in the 80s and 90s. We also review the dating app Bumble in the wake of the company’s IPO, and offer advice about great opening lines when saying hello to a new match on a dating app.