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Yapping about Chanté Josephs article in British Vogue
'Is having a boyfriend embarrassing now?'https://www.vogue.com/article/is-having-a-boyfriend-embarrassing-now00:00 - intro08:55 - a look into the past 17:26 - peoples reactions38:51 - my thoughts
I analysed EVERY SINGLE interaction between Carrie Bradshaw & Mr.Big.
You’re welcome.
I chat about the sunk cost fallacy, why Carrie could never ever leave Big alone. I also talk about avoidant & anxious attachment styles & push / pull dynamics.
#keithurban #nicolekidman #wizardliz #cheating Talking about Nicole Kidman, Keith Urban & the wizard liz situation.
References https://aeqworld.com/2025/05/05/why-women-take-on-the-role-of-mother-in-a-relationship/https://jamestobinphd.com/the-maternalizing-dynamic-in-romantic-relationships/https://www.cosmopolitan.com/entertainment/celebs/a68121738/keith-urban-nicole-kidman-relationship-timeline/https://www.ladbible.com/entertainment/celebrity/nicole-kidman-keith-urban-divorce-cocaine-clause-prenup-sobriety-942984-2025100100:00 - intro02:43 - nicole & keith20:25 - wizard liz & landon
Im back! This week I took a lil deep dive into the world of pronatlism & also discussed the rise of childfree by choice content.References* “How many parents regret having children and how it is linked to their personality and health: Two studies with national samples in Poland” — Konrad Piotrowski et al. (2021) — https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/34288933/* “Development and validation of the Parenthood Regret Scale” — Piotrowski, Mikolajczak, Roskam (2023) — https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37796606/* “Population growth is limited by nutritional impacts on pregnancy success in endangered orcas” — Wasser et al. (2017) — https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5491047/* “Prevalence and incidence of postpartum depression and environmental factors: the IGEDEPP cohort” — early/late PPD incidence study — https://arxiv.org/abs/2008.10382* “Beyond Baby Blues: The Child Penalty in Mental Health in Switzerland” — Nora Bearth (2024) — https://arxiv.org/abs/2410.20861* “Parenthood, Childlessness, and Well-Being: A Life Course Perspective” — D. Umberson (2010) — https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3159916/* “A Systematic Review of Life Satisfaction Experiences Among Childfree Adults” — Stahnke, Cooley, Blackstone (2022) — https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/10664807221104795* “The Quality of Life and Satisfaction with Life of Women Who Are Childless by Choice” — Bień et al. (2017), Poland — https://www.aaem.pl/The-quality-of-life-and-satisfaction-with-life-of-women-who-are-childless-by-choice%2C72530%2C0%2C2.html* “Kids or no kids – men and women are equally satisfied across almost the entire lifespan” — Humboldt-Universität study (2024) — https://www.hu-berlin.de/en/press-portal/nachrichten-en/december-2024/nr-241219* “Mammalian reproduction: an ecological perspective” — F. H. Bronson (1985) — https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/3882162/https://besjournals.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1002/2688-8319.12303* “Animal reproduction under extreme environments” — Parraguez, VH et al. (2024) — https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10940524/* “Environmental constraints on reproductive performance of farmed deer” — G. W. Asher (1996) — https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/0378432096015011* https://erik-engheim.medium.com/feminism-didnt-kill-the-fertility-rate-430d34f46f86* Selective Gestation: The Racial Politics of American Pronatalism — Veronica Agudelo. Covers how demographic decline talk by Musk, Vance, others is tied to race and national identity anxieties. Columbia Political Review* Getting paid to have children: Hungary’s ‘carefare’ regime — Analysis of Viktor Orbán’s regime of incentives + how it’s tied to xenophobia, “native” Hungarian identity, and exclusion of migrants / non-Christian families. The Loop* Viktor Orbán’s Hungary: The Erosion of Reproductive Rights — Analysis by Population Matters of Hungary’s policies: tax exemptions for women with many children; how the framing emphasizes “native births” and casts migrants / queer families as ‘other’. Population Matters* Population Bomb, Great Replacement Theory, and Pronatalism — Kyla Rosin, Biopolitical Times. Explores the overlap between conspiratorial demography (Great Replacement) and modern pronatalist movements. Center for Genetics and Society* https://www.thegoodtrade.com/features/living-alone/#:~:text=Dolan%20explains%20this%20in%20reference,the%20happiest%20population%20of%20all.* https://www.goodto.com/wellbeing/relationships/men-stress-women-out-more-than-kids* https://youtu.be/LHgjYz5oAZk?si=Po0I2ygAHbLVZCnUhttps://youtu.be/Hnd1Taw4CEE?si=33m1eh2bbb2GtnEvhttps://youtu.be/v_iiB4IbVaw?si=JvtGtyCOtxc62uxVhttps://youtu.be/Mxn2n3yrWKI?si=yHE_k2Mh6knxf6aA00:00 - intro06:08 - Pronatalism 39:48 - childfree content58:36 - nature knows best
⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊+𖦹 episode 22 ⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊+𖦹I
feel like I BARELY scratched the surface & might do a more in dept video in the future :)
In this video i speak about the seemingly insignificant & sometimes hidden costs associated with being a woman. I talk about the pink tax, the time that goes into maintaining an appearance, the invisible second shift & the halo effect.
00:00 - intro
01:09 - the pink tax
03:31 - the lifetime beauty bill
06:04 - beauty as a part time job
08:47 - the invisible second shift
12:23 - the halo effect
Chillpeach - Taiyaki : • [no copyright music]
Sources
UN Women Data Hub – “Unpaid Care and Domestic Work” global time‑use database (updated 2023)
Advanced Dermatology – “2024 Beauty Spending & Grooming Habits Survey” (U.S. panel, n≈1 000)
OECD Time‑Use Surveys – average daily unpaid care split, 2019 synthesis
USC Dornsife Center – “Invisible Workload & Fair Play” study on cognitive labor (2024, n=322 mothers)
Journal of Marriage & Family – 2025 national time‑diary analysis of cognitive labor share
Washington Post – Feature: “The CEO of the Household” (Sept 2024)
ILO – “Care Work and Care Jobs for the Future of Decent Work” global brief (2018)
Oxfam International – “Time to Care” report (2020) estimating $10 trillion unpaid‑care value
Harvard / MGH (Etcoff et al.) – “Cosmetics as a Feature of the Extended Human Phenotype” experiment (PLOS One, 2011)
Seton Hall University – 2023 trust‑game study on makeup and cash transfers
Wong & Penner – “Gender and the Returns to Attractiveness” wage‑panel study (Research in Social Stratification, 2016)
Harvard Business Review – Meta‑review of appearance and earnings across 65 studies (2019)
Healthline – “How Often Should You Get a Haircut?” (2023)
Salon Today – “Average Service Times in U.S. Salons” (2022 industry survey)
UCLA Labor Center – “Nail Files” report on salon‑goer frequency (2023)
European Wax Center – Client timing & cadence guidelines (2024 FAQ)
Herzig, Rebecca – Plucked: A History of Hair Removal (2015; lifetime cost calculations)
Forbes – Joan Michelson, “Women Retire With 70 % of Men’s Wealth” (Mar 30 2022)
HerMoney – “Why It Costs $300 K More to Be a Woman” (2023 analysis)
Ellen Taaffe (LinkedIn) – “The Hidden Costs of Being a Woman” post (2024)
TheJournal.ie – “Pink Tax: Why Irish Girls Pay More” (May 2016 price scan)
UNICEF / UN Women – “The Gender Snapshot 2023” (care‑work projections to 2050)
⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊+𖦹 episode 22 ⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊+𖦹
I missed last week wehh wehh wehh
see you next week :)
⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊+𖦹 episode 21 ⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊+𖦹
Leave questions or topic suggestions here ~
https://www.crybabysomatics.com/podcast
This week I answered one of your questions!
"I’ve been in a relationship for a while now, and for most of it, I’ve found myself constantly overextending and giving more than I receive. I try so hard to be the perfect partner!!!! always accommodating, always putting his needs first, even at the expense of my own health and happiness. I stay quiet when he insults me or mistreats me because I don’t want to rock the boat or create conflict. Whenever I try to express how I’m feeling or speak up for myself, I’m made to feel like I’m the problem, like I’m too demanding, too sensitive, or too much to handle. I’ve started noticing these patterns and realising I can’t keep doing this to myself, but I’m scared of what might happen if I change how I behave. What if he pulls away? I’m so used to trying to keep everything smooth, but it’s taking a toll on me. I’m torn between standing up for myself and maintaining the peace, and I don’t know what to do. How do I break this pattern without sabotaging the relationship, or should I even try?"
as usual its a long winded answer :)
love you see you soon x
⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊+𖦹 episode 20 ⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊+𖦹
Welcome back :)
This week I chat about the connection between reading fiction, particularly lit fic, and strengthening empathy.
I discuss the difference between mens and womens preferences when it comes to reading, how much we read and what types of books we choose.
I also discuss the importance of empathy in nature, which humans forget we are part of, how survival of the fittest actually means survival of whoever works best together, which requires empathy & care.*
ೃ༄ 𖦹 Bit of a mish mash swirly video! 𖦹 𓂃
ོ☼𓂃Hope you enjoy :)
https://www.science.org/doi/abs/10.1126/science.1239918https://www.arts.gov/stories/blog/2025/men-women-split-reading-real-and-persists-amid-historical-rate-declineshttps://humanrewritten.com/p/the-empathy-recession-why-empathyhttps://news.umich.edu/empathy-college-students-don-t-have-as-much-as-they-used-to/https://communications.yale.edu/sites/default/files/08.09.2016_the_best_reason_for_reading_book_lovers_live_longer_scientists_say._the_washington_post.pdf
00:00 - intro
01:38 - the fiction gender gap
09:51 - the space between stories
14:16 - empathy is a thread
20:27 - reading as medicine
Donate - https://gofund.me/bdf9aec2
More of a yap video not as structured or planned out!
Maybe i will do a more deep dive researched video about the objectification of women in media?!?
I am very flip floppy in this because I really feel like there are so many other things to be talking about (palestine & literally WW3).
As much as I avoid celebrity culture as much as possible & do not let it influence me in anyway, sabrina carpenter still influences many girls & women so that shouldnt be ignored.
I am still certain that my time & energy could be better used elsewhere so I kept this one short!
See you soon
⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆ episode 18 ⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆
Donate to Adam, Karim & Wassim :) - https://gofund.me/11bc4f21
Welcome back :)
This week I spoke about white feminism, apolitical girlboss capitalistic tiktok feminism etc :)
https://www.instagram.com/kate_bhakti/
See you next week :) x
REFERENCELINKS
https://restofworld.org/2021/palestine-social-media-silence/
https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/2017/04/150522/girlboss-netflix-true-story
https://www.dazeddigital.com/fashion/article/35671/1/problematic-nasty-gal-netflix-series-sophia-amoruso-girlboss-lawsuits
https://goodonyou.eco/how-ethical-is-boohoo/
https://www.theringer.com/2017/04/29/tv/the-problem-with-girlboss-feminism-98f48bb6aa16
https://roundtable.beloit.edu/2025/04/09/chappell-roan-activist-or-queer-capitalist/
https://twssmagazine.com/2021/06/19/florence-given-and-coffee-table-feminism/
https://journals.sagepub.com/home/SMS
ALTERNATIVE SHOPPING
https://www.shoplikeyougiveadamn.com/en-ie
MY INSPIRATIONS & TEACHERS! :
https://substack.com/@parismwendwa
https://www.instagram.com/theslumflower/
https://www.instagram.com/paris.mwendwa/
https://www.instagram.com/adriennemareebrown/?hl=en
https://nmaahc.si.edu/audre-lorde
https://www.instagram.com/resmaamenakem/?hl=en
https://www.instagram.com/wizard_bisan1/?hl=en
https://www.theslumflower.com/
https://substack.com/@nergiz
Music - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSWYAclv2I8&list=PLQwRmTwWx0ubcpv0SkHroupj1LqW5_Va5
00:00 - intro
01:26 - what is white feminism
06:21 - lean in
10:29 - individualism = empowerment ?
18:35 - TikTok feminism
27:22 - aesthetic of empowerment
32:21 - the politics white feminism refuses to touch
36:05 - matriarchal ecosystem
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