Going Yard

Summary: 

The boys are back, and apparently weddings, mermaids, and Creed are taking over Going Yard.

Alex kicks things off with a Point Pleasant getaway, some questionable haircut memories, and a reminder that he might be the only person with a designated shirt for every day of the workweek.

Meanwhile, Jake heads to Sacramento to officiate Brittany and Jared's wedding, where the festivities include an Ironman competition sharing the hotel, the return of the Carrot Top debate, and a trip to a nearly empty dive bar featuring a live mermaid swimming above the customers.

Then things get even stranger when Casey gets hoisted into the air to Creed's "Higher," and the wedding shuttle transforms into a nightclub.

Finally, the brothers return to Philadelphia sports, where the Eagles' struggles inspire an increasingly elaborate Game of Thrones comparison.

Another week, another adventure. Welcome back to Going Yard!

Episode chapters and timestamps:

Timestamp
Chapter
00:00 | Welcome back to Going Yard
00:45 | Alex's disastrous haircut history
04:00 | The latest barbershop adventure
10:05 | Alex's Point Pleasant getaway
17:15 | Spooktober and the nostalgia of old music
20:55 | Alex's weekly shirt rotation
25:45 | Bikes, breweries, and the Jersey Shore
34:00 | Jake heads to Sacramento
38:15 | The Carrot Top debate returns
41:00 | Wedding guests versus Ironman athletes
45:00 | Rehearsal preparations and officiant duties
48:05 | Rehearsal dinner and wedding weekend festivities
59:55 | The mysterious mermaid dive bar
1:02:45 | Alex's alarm interrupts the podcast again
1:04:00 | What's it like working as a mermaid?
1:08:45 | Getting ready for the wedding
1:10:00 | The luxury wedding buses
1:18:00 | Officiating Brittany and Jared's ceremony
1:22:05 | Wedding traditions and the chair lift
1:23:05 | Casey gets lifted to Creed's "Higher"
1:26:20 | The wedding shuttle becomes a nightclub
1:33:30 | Airport chaos and "going feral"
1:34:45 | The Gentlemen and television recommendations
1:38:00 | Eagles frustrations and football talk
1:40:30 | The Eagles are basically Game of Thrones
1:43:10 | This was always a Sixers podcast

Chapters are approximate editing markers

https://www.youtube.com/@goingyardley

Summary

The boys are back from Italy, and there is a LOT to unpack.

Jake and Alex recap their trip to northern Italy for Cassidy and Ken’s wedding, starting with an improvised twin reunion on the airplane and a welcome party that somehow ends with an Italian DJ ordering an unreasonable amount of focaccia.

From a tiny hillside hotel and a beautiful family vineyard to a wedding reception featuring Mago Mago, the Italian magician who might have overstayed his welcome, the brothers relive the highlights of an unforgettable trip. There’s also the legendary rave cave, Alex’s brief transformation into “Ed Yardley,” and a few days exploring the walled city of Lucca.

Then it’s back to reality—and Philadelphia sports misery. The Eagles are battling injuries, the Phillies have disappointed, and Jake and Alex are somehow finding comfort in being underdogs again.

Ciao, bello. Going Yard is back!

Episode chapters and timestamps

These timestamps follow the recording, with chapter titles shortened for podcast navigation.

Timestamp
Chapter
00:00 | Clippy's dating advice and the Patch Pals
02:12 | We're back — and the Eagles are falling apart
04:45 | Ciao, bello! Recapping Italy
07:17 | The fake twin reunion on the airplane
11:55 | Nine hours in the air and The Godfather
13:23 | The Italian wedding itinerary
14:59 | Welcome drinks on the covered bridge
17:58 | A family vineyard and an unforgettable photograph
22:40 | The mysterious Italian welcome drink
23:59 | The welcome party gets underway
27:29 | Casey: the lighthouse in a sea of pizza
29:49 | The Italian DJ's enormous focaccia order
30:17 | The birth of Ed Yardley
35:15 | The first night was only the beginning
36:07 | The charming 12-room Italian hotel
40:37 | The wedding bus and a memorable lunch
44:39 | Cassidy and Ken's wedding ceremony
47:21 | Mago Mago, the Italian magician
49:54 | When the magician won't stop doing magic
52:10 | Wedding dinner and unsolicited twin-parenting advice
54:53 | Cake cutting under the olive tree
56:07 | The wine cellar becomes the rave cave
57:19 | Alex gets his sweet feet back
59:55 | The wedding dance floor gets wild
1:02:09 | Farewell brunch and four trains to Lucca
1:03:57 | Exploring the walled city of Lucca
1:05:50 | Jazz, cafés, and Italian street life
1:09:59 | Souvenirs and the flight home
1:11:18 | Back to Philadelphia Eagles misery
1:12:47 | Breaking down the Jaguars loss
1:14:31 | Finding positives in an injured Eagles roster
1:18:55 | The defense, the offense, and the late-game collapse
1:20:33 | Is the Eagles' new offensive scheme the problem?
1:23:38 | The kickoff decision that changed the game
1:26:10 | Can the Eagles turn their season around?
1:29:59 | Low expectations, high hopes
1:31:21 | Phillies disappointment and the Sixers pivot
1:33:42 | The boys are officially back

https://www.youtube.com/@goingyardley

Fall is here, football is back, and Alex is already creating workplace problems after accidentally telling a coworker he had a weekend date with Chris Hansen instead of RedZone host Scott Hanson.

From there, Alex recaps a great weekend before attempting a peaceful James Taylor commute in the increasingly unreliable Bitty Buggy—complete with rain coming through the window, a broken windshield wiper scraping the glass, and an extra 40 minutes of traffic.

Meanwhile, Jake impulsively buys an enormous jar of pickles before reigniting the year-long Walk to Mordor controversy. After his new phone mysteriously credits him with extra miles, Alex launches a full doping investigation and declares the competition’s integrity destroyed.

Jake also unveils his Italy-inspired Caesar haircut, the guys return to NFL Pick’ems, and a simple 50-cent wing happy hour turns into full-blown barroom drama when a stranger asks Jake for relationship advice in the bathroom—then immediately ignores it.

0:00 — Going Yard is back & NFL Pick’ems return
2:30 — Merch ideas and Jake starts “percolating”
3:15 — Alex accidentally tells work he has a date with Chris Hansen
4:45 — Alex’s actual date update
5:15 — AJ calls with spontaneous weekend plans
~10:00 — Weekend adventures & football season settling in
~18:00 — James Taylor enters Alex’s life
20:25 — The lovely weekend comes to an end
21:00 — The Bitty Buggy is falling apart
21:55 — James Taylor vs. the commute from hell
22:20 — The windshield wiper starts scraping the glass
23:45 — “Fire and Rain” becomes painfully appropriate
24:35 — Jake impulsively buys a pickle jar bigger than his head
26:00 — The Hannibal Buress pickle-juice method
27:40 — Alex declares the Walk to Mordor competition fraudulent
28:40 — Explaining the 1,700-mile challenge
29:40 — The accusations against Kyle begin
30:55 — Jake’s new phone wipes his Mordor progress
31:45 — Jake discovers the missing miles
32:20 — Mysterious bonus mileage appears
32:55 — “There could have been a double dip”
34:40 — Alex loses faith in the entire competition
35:00 — The doping analogy
35:25 — “Cheaters deserve prison”
36:25 — Broken windshield wipers become a metaphor for Alex’s life
36:50 — Jake vs. Kyle: two rams locked in the grasslands
39:05 — A fantasy matchup decided by less than a point
~40:00 — Jake unveils the new haircut
43:30 — The Italy-inspired Caesar cut
44:00 — Caesar cut vs. Friar Jake vs. Simple Jack
45:45 — Phillies playoff check-in
46:45 — The 50-cent wing happy hour begins
47:45 — Playing cards with wing-covered hands
48:00 — Learning “Fuck the Dealer”
50:15 — Jake admits he has absolutely no poker face
51:15 — A stranger approaches Jake in the bathroom
51:50 — “My ex is here with her new boyfriend…”
52:15 — Jake gives the stranger very clear advice
53:15 — Jake returns to the table looking like he saw a ghost
53:45 — The stranger ignores Jake’s advice
~54:30 — The exes finally start talking
56:15 — Someone starts crying
56:40 — “I was never the same after you”
57:15 — The entire bar is now watching
58:15 — Jake desperately shuffles cards through the drama
59:05 — The check finally arrives
59:45 — “LEAVE HER! YOU DON’T DESERVE THAT!”
1:00:15 — Planning the follow-up investigation
1:00:45 — Going Yard may be heading to Italy
~1:03:00 — NFL Pick’ems results
1:04:40 — Alex correctly guesses his score
1:05:25 — Week 2 NFL recap begins
~1:15+ — Around the NFL, picks & football reactions

https://www.youtube.com/@goingyardley

Summary: 

Football is officially back, but first Jake and Alex have some important business to handle. The guys recap a weekend featuring suspiciously “healthy” Muddy Buddies, frisbee golf, an overly intense pickleball opponent, and Jake’s descent into underwear, vegetables and football during his week home alone with Pippin.

Jake’s new phone brings tragedy when nearly 1,600 miles of Fantasy Hike progress disappear, while Patty’s AI dog-sitting video inspires the unfortunately named “Patty Pets Pets.” Alex counters with a chaotic weekend of his own involving work happy hour strategy, an armpit-smelling request, a doomed coffee table, a robotic lawnmower and a Princeton date.

But the real innovation comes at work, where Alex reveals his method for warming a chilled Stroopwafel: putting it in his back pocket and “Mother Goosing” it.

Finally, football returns with Eagles reactions, fantasy victory laps, early-season panic and some Carson Wentz appreciation.

TIMESTAMPS / CHAPTERS

00:00 — Hostile Takeovers & Going Yard Begins
01:45 — One-Year-Old Birthday Parties & “Thanks, Neff”
03:45 — The Healthy Muddy Buddy Propaganda
08:35 — Frisbee Golf & Pickleball Rage
13:15 — Big Booty Mixes at the Community Park
17:35 — Jake Finally Gets a New Phone
20:00 — Corrections From the Vegas Episode
24:20 — The Fantasy Hike Disaster: 1,500+ Miles Gone
26:50 — Blue the Dog Becomes an AI Musician
28:45 — Introducing “Patty Pets Pets”
30:25 — Jake's Single Guy Week
34:45 — Alex's Actual Single Guy Weekend
41:05 — Armpit Girl & the Coffee Table Disaster
46:20 — The Robot Lawnmower
49:25 — Alex's Workday Food Routine
51:40 — The Stroopwafel Appears
53:40 — Alex “Mother Gooses” the Stroopwafel
56:00 — Stroop Kid & the Greatest Cartoon Bedroom Ever
1:01:40 — Alex's Princeton Date & The Bent Spoon
1:07:15 — Football Is Back & Fantasy Misery Returns
1:13:35 — Eagles vs. Commanders Breakdown
1:28:15 — Around the NFC East
1:32:05 — Week 1 Fantasy Football Victory Laps
1:43:45 — Goose and Go
1:45:00 — Carson Wentz Appreciation Corner
1:46:40 — Patty Pets Pets Returns & Goodbye

#GoingYard #Podcast #ComedyPodcast #Football #NFL #FantasyFootball #PhiladelphiaEagles #Eagles #PhillySports #Stroopwafel #PodcastClips

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Episode Summary

Episode 50! Jake returns from a Vegas bachelor party physically depleted but spiritually fulfilled—and finally answers the question Going Yard listeners have been waiting weeks to hear: Was Carrot Top worth it?

Before getting there, Alex recaps a football kickoff party featuring five TVs, backyard competitions, beer helmets, tackling dummies, and increasingly questionable contests. Then Jake takes us through the full Vegas marathon: four hours of sleep, Excalibur buffet strategy, yardstick drinks, Stadium Swim, college football in 100-degree heat, and a bachelor party slowly losing its grip on reality.

Then comes the main event. Jake reveals the full manifesto that convinced 12 grown men to see Carrot Top and delivers his official review.

But somehow the night gets even stranger when the groom bets on 14 red—and hits it twice in a row.

Plus: fantasy drafts, Fremont Street, fat little piggies, bubble craps, White Castle, and the long road to recovery. 

• 0:00 – NEVER VAMP 
• 0:30 – Going Yard goes corporate 
• 1:05 – Jake somehow survived Vegas 
• 1:45 – Alex attends the Third Annual Football Day 
• 2:45 – Five TVs and full football degeneracy 
• 3:00 – A man gives birth to a football 
• 3:30 – Beer helmets: legitimate technology or always a gag? 
• 5:00 – The Football Day spread 
• 5:45 – The Dad Strength Competition 
• 6:45 – Alex wins without having the dad bod 
• 7:15 – Pushups, football bowling & backyard competitions 
• 8:00 – Best Juke Move 
• 8:35 – The most questionable competition of Football Day 
• 9:30 – Alex has to experience this mostly sober 
• 10:45 – The Vegas Saga begins
• 11:45 – Four hours of sleep before Vegas 
• 12:30 – Welcome to Excalibur 
• 13:30 – The all-inclusive deal that started everything 
• 14:15 – Casey becomes obsessed with the buffet 
• 15:40 – Yardstick drinks immediately enter the equation 
• 16:45 – The Knights of Excalibur 
• 17:30 – The dangerous all-inclusive Italian dinner 
• 18:20 – Night One catches up with Jake 
• 19:15 – The savvy early exit 
• 19:45 – Evaluating the Excalibur buffet 
• 21:10 – Jake's newfound love for honeydew 
• 21:45 – Stadium Swim
• 22:30 – Why the groom is a football sicko 
• 23:30 – Walking through a casino in bathing suits 
• 24:15 – The longest escalator in human history 
• 24:45 – Football Mecca 
• 25:40 – A PITCHER of espresso martini 
• 26:20 – Jake secretly switches to orange juice and water 
• 27:15 – Some members of the group do NOT pace themselves 
• 28:40 – “Bin Laden was part of the CIA” 
• 29:00 – Jake realizes he's way too sober 
• 29:40 – An eight-hour shift at the pool 
• 30:25 – The most important bachelor-party nap of all time 
• 30:50 – IT'S CARROT TOP TIME
• 31:00 – Jake actually convinced everyone 
• 31:30 – The Carrot Top manifesto spreads to Discord 
• 33:00 – Jake reads the complete Carrot Top sales pitch
• 34:25 – “We need a little friction because that's how you make a fire” 
• 35:00 – Why a TERRIBLE show would still be a win 
• 35:50 – Alex reviews Jake's salesmanship 
• 36:30 – Usher never stood a chance 
• 37:00 – Cashing in the sacred buffet tokens 
• 37:45 – Entering the Luxor 
• 38:15 – The warm-up comic 
• 39:15 – What exactly IS a Carrot Top show? 
• 40:10 – How does 61-year-old Carrot Top look?
• 41:45 – Tie-dye, leopard pants and the legendary red hair 
• 42:20 – The Carrot Top hype video 
• 43:10 – Carrot Top begins firing 
• 44:30 – Jake realizes he's responsible for bringing 12 people here 
• 45:15 – The show's extremely sophisticated set list 
• 46:15 – Jake starts sweating 
• 47:00 – The 2003 energy is alive and well 
• 48:15 – Why Carrot Top is basically a band 
• 49:10 – The Vegas hotel-room joke that gets Jake 
• 50:40 – Why live comedy hits differently 
• 51:05 – Carrot Top understands Vegas tourists 
• 52:00 – The encore nobody expected 
• 52:30 – The official bachelor-party Carrot Top reviews
• 53:20 – The group is perfectly divided 
• 53:45 – Jake's original Carrot Top thesis was CORRECT
• 54:20 – Vegas gives everyone $25 in free play 
• 55:00 – Modern slot machines make absolutely no sense 
• 56:00 – The groom puts everything on his birthday number 
• 57:10 – 14 RED
• 58:00 – The casino accidentally overpays him 
• 59:10 – “I gotta go 14 again” 
• 59:40 – 14 RED. AGAIN.
• 1:00:00 – A roughly 1-in-1,444 outcome 
• 1:01:00 – $2,500 in two spins 
• 1:01:40 – Wait... the casino paid him wrong 
• 1:02:00 – WE GOTTA GO
• 1:02:30 – Thank you, Carrot Top 
• 1:03:00 – Fantasy Draft Sunday 
• 1:04:15 – Drafting from a Caesars Palace suite 
• 1:05:10 – The groom may have officially peaked 
• 1:06:20 – Champagne, championship rings & fantasy trash talk 
• 1:07:00 – The F1 barcade 
• 1:07:20 – Welcome to Fremont Street 
• 1:08:00 – Vegas becomes a cyberpunk dystopia 
• 1:09:30 – The 1980s vision of the future 
• 1:10:30 – Biscuit is ready to blow
• 1:11:30 – Kyle develops a dangerous relationship with pig-themed slots 
• 1:12:45 – Discovering the “ATM” 
• 1:13:30 – Jake turns $47 into $250 
• 1:14:25 – Ending Vegas with White Castle 
• 1:15:15 – Jake makes one final gambling decision 
• 1:16:00 – “One more piggy” 
• 1:16:30 – The airport tries to pull Jake back in 
• 1:17:00 – Smoking slot machines at the airport 
• 1:17:40 – The recovery begins 
• 1:18:20 – Fantasy football refuses to let Jake sleep 
• 1:18:55 – Jake wants NOTHING to do this weekend 
• 1:19:20 – Final verdict on Carrot Top 
• 1:20:15 – Episode 50 in the books 

https://www.youtube.com/@goingyardley

Summary

Jake and Alex are one episode away from 50, and football season has officially arrived.

Alex starts with the Eagles preseason game that never happened: free tickets, a last-minute meetup with Andrew, brutal stadium traffic, $50 parking, and the eventual decision to simply give up and go home. Meanwhile, Jake’s considerably calmer weekend at a local historic museum uncovers Yardley family history, a 1700s ferry operation, and confirmation of his long-running theory that old taverns were spaced roughly a day’s horse ride apart.

Naturally, this reignites Jake’s dream of creating a communal tavern—before a disappointing cheesesteak nearly ruins the afternoon.

Then Jake enters full fantasy-football sicko mode, recounting his livestreamed Brilliantly Dumb draft, his legendary rosemary nuts, and a looming thunderstorm. The guys wrap with The Bear, fantasy commissioner Lisa, Green Lantern, Phillies baseball, and Alex revealing his scientifically perfected baseball-nap setup. 

• 0:00 – The Kelce brothers stole Alex's Art of War shtick 
• 0:45 – Running into a Going Yard listener in the wild 
• 2:00 – Dylan recreates the high school senior-trip photo 
• 3:30 – Alex is officially locked in at the gym 
• 4:30 – Labor Day weekend is about to get spicy 
• 5:00 – Surprise Eagles preseason tickets 
• 6:00 – Andrew arrives in full Eagles mode 
• 7:15 – The Eagles trip begins falling apart 
• 8:00 – The worst traffic Alex has ever experienced 
• 8:40 – $50 PARKING FOR PRESEASON?!
• 9:15 – Pulling the ripcord on the Eagles game 
• 10:40 – Jake's equally exciting weekend: local history 
• 11:30 – The Yardleys apparently ran a ferry 
• 12:40 – River ferry or magical fairy? 
• 13:20 – Touring a 1600s cabin 
• 14:15 – Musty, musky, damp AND moist 
• 15:05 – The tavern theory is finally CONFIRMED 
• 16:00 – Jake gains access to the sacred tavern book 
• 16:40 – The 250-year, $1-a-year lease 
• 17:30 – Inside an old-school tavern 
• 18:30 – Jake's tavern dream returns
• 19:45 – Why intergenerational spaces matter 
• 21:00 – Community without screens 
• 22:25 – Jake and Lisa try Steve's Prince of Steaks 
• 23:00 – Oh no. It's bad. 
• 23:30 – A cheesesteak shop you can hose down 
• 24:40 – Angelo's has ruined Lisa 
• 25:30 – The philosophy of Cheese Whiz 
• 26:30 – Steve's gets one final chance 
• 28:20 – We're slipping some sports into the middle 
• 29:00 – AJ and the fantasy-football dissertations 
• 29:40 – Jake declares: THIS IS MY YEAR
• 31:00 – Entering the Brilliantly Dumb fantasy league 
• 32:30 – The legend of Jake's rosemary nuts 
• 34:00 – Why bringing nuts is an elite football-hosting move 
• 34:30 – Knuckle-to-knuckle communal nuts 
• 35:25 – “Nuts for Football” 
• 35:50 – We're almost at Episode 50! 
• 36:45 – Should Episode 50 be in person? 
• 37:55 – Back to the fantasy draft 
• 38:30 – 2-QB chaos immediately breaks out 
• 39:30 – Jake finds his fantasy-football edge 
• 40:00 – Lightning threatens the livestream 
• 41:00 – Thousands of people are apparently watching Jake draft 
• 41:30 – The chat becomes obsessed with the nuts 
• 42:10 – Sloppy Mark wins a putter 
• 43:10 – Jake is officially a fantasy-football sicko 
• 44:20 – The Bear spoiler warning 
• 45:00 – Breaking down The Bear
• 45:30 – The caramel candle magic trick 
• 46:15 – The snow-day service 
• 47:00 – Why The Bear works 
• 48:10 – Jake IS The Bear 
• 49:00 – Weekly Lisa appreciation 
• 49:30 – Going Yard Book Club?! 
• 50:30 – Alex randomly discovers a story about true friendship 
• 51:50 – Dishes are a meditative practice 
• 52:30 – Fantasy podcasts make Jake clean better 
• 53:00 – Pippin begins the Night's Watch 
• 54:00 – Jake and Lisa's wildly different evenings 
• 55:00 – Eastern philosophy vs. PrizePicks 
• 56:10 – Lisa becomes a fantasy-football commissioner 
• 58:00 – Fantasy football has infiltrated the household 
• 59:00 – Silo check-in 
• 59:30 – Jake finally gets a good Green Lantern show 
• 1:01:00 – Why Green Lantern has always worked for Jake 
• 1:02:40 – HBO's post-episode breakdowns 
• 1:03:50 – Alex would rather watch baseball and fall asleep 
• 1:04:40 – The scientifically perfect Phillies nap
• 1:05:15 – Fan speed: exactly two 
• 1:05:45 – Rosemary crackers and cherry blossom seltzer 
• 1:06:25 – The mini Twix finishing move 
• 1:07:00 – The Phillies are playing ball 
• 1:07:55 – Putting a weighted blanket on the podcast 
• 1:08:20 – See ya, love ya 

#GoingYard #GoingYardPodcast #ComedyPodcast #TwinBrothers 

https://www.youtube.com/@goingyardley

Summary

Jake comes straight from a run and Alex arrives in his trusty “Bitty Buggy” as the brothers kick things off debating which Mario Kart and movie vehicles best represent their cars. From there, they fully embrace their Funcle Era, recounting the decision to attend their five-year-old nephew’s birthday dressed as Minions—including a costumed Wawa run and the crushing realization that the birthday boy wasn’t particularly impressed.

Alex recaps another date in Philadelphia, nearly misses a romantic opportunity at a singles event, and may have manifested his future Dalmatian into existence. The brothers then revisit one of their strangest Los Angeles memories: catering a celebrity-filled party featuring John Mayer, John Legend, John Stamos, LL Cool J, Darth Vader, and Rob Lowe thanking Stormtroopers for their service.

Finally, Jake channels The Bear and turns a humble honeydew into an absurdly elaborate frozen dessert—proving that sometimes you just have to do the dew. 

Timestamps

• 0:00 – Jake comes straight from a run 
• 1:30 – Interview vibes & losing your sole 
• 3:00 – The Funcle Era continues 
• 3:30 – Alex's Nissan Juke is a Bitty Buggy 
• 5:00 – Defending the Bitty Buggy 
• 6:00 – Alex's car literally starts falling apart 
• 7:30 – What movie vehicle is your car? 
• 9:00 – Jake's Jeep gets a questionable Jurassic Park comparison 
• 10:45 – The five-year-old Minion birthday party 
• 11:30 – Going to Wawa dressed as Minions 
• 12:20 – Discussing stock portfolios in full Minion costumes 
• 15:15 – The Minions make their grand entrance 
• 16:30 – Children expose us as Minion frauds 
• 17:30 – Alex's birthday-party side quest 
• 18:30 – A five-year-old gets slowly hunted by an elderly dog 
• 19:45 – “Why are you dressed like that?” 
• 21:00 – The chocolate milk legend 
• 21:45 – Alex's blind date at Talula's Garden 
• 22:30 – Is there such a thing as too much fig? 
• 23:45 – Chaotic Singles & watching the Phillies 
• 25:45 – Alex leaves approximately 10 minutes too early 
• 27:00 – Alex vision-boards his dream Philly apartment 
• 28:30 – Manifesting a Dalmatian 
• 29:30 – Alex's completely legitimate firefighter story 
• 31:30 – 50-cent wings & working from the bar 
• 33:15 – Remembering our craziest LA catering job 
• 35:00 – John Mayer, John Legend & John Stamos 
• 36:00 – A coworker has no idea who John Stamos is 
• 37:15 – New Girl comes to life 
• 38:30 – LL Cool J, Prince's band & Stormtroopers 
• 40:00 – Rob Lowe joins the Dark Side
• 41:30 – “Thank you for your service” 
• 42:30 – LL Cool J takes the stage 
• 43:15 – The Hollywood acid trip
• 45:30 – Going analog & the transistor radio 
• 46:45 – Alex's old-school alarm clock 
• 48:30 – The Phillies are rolling 
• 51:00 – Fantasy football season is officially here 
• 52:00 – Jake joins a 16-team guillotine league 
• 54:00 – Preseason injuries create immediate chaos 
• 56:00 – Fantasy football group chats come alive 
• 57:00 – “This reeks of collusion” 
• 58:00 – Alex gets the celebrity entrance into a new league 
• 59:30 – Trying to trade the No. 2 pick 
• 1:01:15 – The art of being a group-chat volume shooter 
• 1:03:00 – Never double-book your fantasy drafts 
• 1:04:30 – Is opening NFL weekend becoming a Boys Bash? 
• 1:05:15 – Jake sells Alex on Silo
• 1:08:00 – The Bear gives Jake secondhand anxiety 
• 1:09:45 – How Jake and Lisa divide cooking duties 
• 1:11:00 – Jake is a jazz chef 
• 1:12:00 – The summer harvest is ending 
• 1:13:30 – The honeydew of all honeydews
• 1:15:30 – Instagram influences Jake's dessert plans 
• 1:16:30 – “You cannot come into the kitchen” 
• 1:17:20 – Elevating the honeydew 
• 1:18:30 – The plan immediately goes wrong 
• 1:19:15 – Pistachios enter the equation 
• 1:20:30 – Jake channels The Bear
• 1:21:30 – The final honeydew presentation 
• 1:22:30 – Alex reviews Jake's culinary journey 
• 1:23:15 – Why honeydew deserves better 
• 1:25:00 – That's how you do the dew

https://www.youtube.com/@goingyardley

Summary

Football is officially back, which means Going Yard is slowly returning to its roots—but not before Jake and Alex solve late-stage capitalism.

The brothers open by imagining a dystopian future where everything in your own home is a microtransaction, from vending-machine refrigerators to a 29-cent bidet experience. After recapping the Phillies’ Field of Dreams game, Jake discovers the emotional toll of the “toll troll,” while Alex arrives at work to find a tiny bird terrorizing his coworkers.

Then Jake prepares for yet another bachelor party in Vegas and makes an increasingly passionate case for choosing Carrot Top over Blue Man Group. What starts as a simple show preference becomes a full philosophical argument about happiness, expectations, novelty, and why a terrible Carrot Top performance might actually be the perfect bachelor-party memory.

Finally, football returns as the guys break down the Eagles and run their first fantasy football mock draft of the season. 

Timestamps

• 0:00 – Welcome to the microtransaction dystopia 
• 1:00 – Paying 29 cents to use your own bidet 
• 2:00 – Going Yard's choose-your-own-adventure paywall 
• 3:15 – Weekend recap 
• 4:00 – Phillies Field of Dreams game 
• 6:10 – Schwarbomb into the cornfield 
• 6:45 – Jake's weird Friday-night sleep pattern 
• 10:30 – Jake finally gets E-ZPass 
• 11:00 – Cash-only tolls in 2026?! 
• 12:15 – The Toll Troll 
• 12:50 – Football is officially back 
• 13:40 – An absolutely brutal Eagles preseason game 
• 14:45 – The Eagles' international players 
• 16:00 – Why the Eagles are so damn easy to root for 
• 17:25 – Alex becomes a city guy 
• 18:40 – THERE'S A BIRD IN THE OFFICE
• 20:30 – Pokémon completely derails the bird conversation 
• 21:55 – Grown men are terrified of a tiny bird 
• 23:30 – The bird demands a one-on-one with Alex's boss 
• 25:45 – Wandering around Old City 
• 26:30 – Random people drawing Philadelphia architecture 
• 27:50 – Working in LA vs. tourists enjoying LA 
• 29:40 – Jake has ANOTHER bachelor party 
• 30:00 – The Bachelor Party Group Chat Bingo Card 
• 33:45 – The Vegas plan & the all-important lazy river 
• 35:15 – Carrot Top vs. Blue Man Group
• 36:10 – Alex somehow knows the entire Gallagher/Carrot Top backstory 
• 38:00 – Jake prepares to take the Carrot Top campaign public 
• 40:40 – Jake gets philosophical about happiness 
• 43:00 – Why expectations determine the Vegas show choice 
• 44:20 – The full Carrot Top manifesto begins
• 46:25 – Alex has never seen Jake more alive 
• 48:20 – Is Carrot Top simply a fun hill to die on? 
• 49:15 – Criss Angel enters the conversation 
• 50:45 – Recreating Ocean's Eleven at the Bellagio 
• 52:40 – The Carrot Top orange wave 
• 54:20 – Going Yard officially returns to fantasy football 
• 56:15 – The first mock draft of the season 
• 57:15 – Gibbs vs. Bijan at No. 1 
• 59:45 – What do we do at pick six? 
• 1:01:50 – Why we're stockpiling running backs 
• 1:04:00 – Derrick Henry vs. Chase Brown vs. Kenneth Walker 
• 1:07:20 – Three straight running backs?! 
• 1:10:30 – Searching for our first receiver 
• 1:17:00 – Garrett Wilson gets the call 
• 1:22:30 – Betting on Caleb Williams and Chicago 
• 1:24:00 – Handcuff strategy takes over 
• 1:28:45 – We waited WAY too long at tight end 
• 1:35:40 – The final roster 
• 1:37:20 – What we'd change about the draft 
• 1:40:30 – Football is back and so is Going Yard

Hashtags

#GoingYard #GoingYardPodcast #ComedyPodcast #TwinBrothers

https://www.youtube.com/@goingyardley

Summary:

Jake and Alex are back after another packed summer weekend, starting with an unexpectedly wholesome encounter between two strangers running through a downpour. That somehow leads directly into Jake’s newest lifestyle change: joining the bidet community and discovering the invigorating power of what Alex dubs the “Sphincter Ice Plunge.”

The brothers recap their fantasy football league’s WWE Royal Rumble draft lottery before realizing their twin powers are apparently back after showing up to a birthday party—and the podcast itself—in nearly identical outfits. From there, it’s a weekend of first birthdays, engagement parties, deer etiquette, Greek food, and embracing the “fun uncle” stage of life. Alex finally spills the details on a first date at Sassafras, while Jake tries unsuccessfully to sell him on Baldur’s Gate 3. They wrap with Ted Lasso, Alley Cats, summer movies, gaming streams, and a potential return to Going Yard’s sports roots

Timestamps

• 0:00 – Big stretches, mattress crimes & twin shirts 
• 2:30 – Morning workouts and the prison workout routine 
• 7:00 – Jake goes running in a downpour 
• 10:30 – Meeting the mysterious fellow rain runner 
• 12:30 – AI DJ appreciation 
• 16:00 – Jake enters the bidet life 
• 18:30 – The “Sphincter Ice Plunge” 
• 19:30 – Shoutout to Mitch & The Go Route
• 21:00 – Fantasy football meets WWE Royal Rumble 
• 24:00 – Alex’s suspicious Royal Rumble dominance 
• 25:00 – Accidentally dressing like twins again 
• 28:00 – Entering the Fun Uncle Era 
• 29:30 – Rover takes over the one-year-old birthday party 
• 32:30 – Alex’s future Dalmatian, Woofy 
• 36:00 – The engagement party & an elite Greek food spread 
• 39:30 – Five deer crash the engagement party 
• 41:00 – Why you always bow to deer 
• 43:00 – Smokers vs. vapers 
• 45:00 – The secret garage whiskey crew 
• 46:30 – The Instagram influencer takes the family photo 
• 49:00 – Alex finally tells us about his first date 
• 50:00 – Sassafras, $17 cocktails & the Penicillin 
• 51:30 – The danger of dating someone who might listen to the podcast 
• 53:30 – Is Alex about to become a sailor? 
• 55:00 – What first dates are like in your 30s 
• 58:30 – Jake ambushes Alex over falling asleep during Baldur’s Gate 3
• 1:00:30 – Why Baldur’s Gate 3 finally clicked 
• 1:03:30 – Should Going Yard start streaming? 
• 1:05:00 – Going Yard’s sports roots are coming back 
• 1:05:30 – Ted Lasso returns 
• 1:06:30 – Alex binges Alley Cats
• 1:07:30 – Alex vs. the critics 
• 1:11:30 – Summer movies & bringing back the double feature 
• 1:16:30 – Taco Tuesday, homemade croutons & wrapping up 
• 1:18:00 – Bribing listeners for guest spots

#GoingYard #GoingYardPodcast #ComedyPodcast #BrotherPodcast #TwinBrothers #FantasyFootball #RoyalRumble #WWE #RunningInTheRain #FunUncle #FirstDate #Philadelphia #BaldursGate3 #TedLasso #PodcastLife

https://www.youtube.com/@goingyardley

Summary

After months of planning, Jake and Alex finally get to play tour guide as longtime friends Tanner and Aubrey visit Philadelphia for the first time. From Wawa jokes years in the making to boozy history tours, Liberty Bell selfies, Angelo's cheesesteaks, and an unforgettable Michelin-recognized pasta dinner, the brothers break down what makes Philadelphia—and Bucks County—feel like home. 

Along the way, they reminisce about childhood memories at the family picnic, debate what city they'd most want to give tours in, share stories from New Hope and Lambertville, discover the perfect dirty pasta water martini, and wrap things up with some quick thoughts on another huge week in Philadelphia sports. It's a love letter to their hometown, good friends, and one of the best weekends they've had in a long time. 

Chapters

• 0:00 – Welcome back & Tanner's Philly visit 
• 2:00 – Boozy history tours & Morgan Wallen fans 
• 3:00 – If we were professional tour guides... 
• 8:00 – The Alaska rafting story 
• 11:00 – Becoming a "city guy" 
• 15:00 – Bar chess & meeting strangers 
• 20:00 – Planning a New Orleans trip 
• 23:00 – Family picnic memories 
• 31:00 – Giving Tanner the Bucks County tour 
• 34:00 – New Hope & Lambertville 
• 39:00 – Angelo's cheesesteaks 
• 42:00 – Liberty Bell & Independence Hall 
• 45:00 – Michelin-recognized pasta dinner 
• 57:00 – Looking back on the perfect weekend 
• 1:00:00 – Phillies & Sixers offseason talk 
• 1:01:00 – Closing thoughts

#GoingYard #Philadelphia #NewHopePA #Lambertville #VisitPhilly #Cheesesteak #FoodPodcast #ComedyPodcast #BrotherPodcast #TravelStories #BucksCounty #Podcast

https://www.youtube.com/@goingyardley