Goodnight: A Podcast Full of Stories!

Oscar Wilde's Wittiest play is given new life in this 2023 reimagining. Gone is Algernon the Aristocratic Playboy, Here is Algy The Nonbinary, Alternative Badboi. Complete with Cell Phones and Modern Romance. This Timeless Trivial Tale and its zany characters are ready to live and breathe again.

Earnest! A Trivial Comedy for Serious people.

By Oscar Wilde

Adaptation by Connor J-L Casady (aka CC)

Performed at Hooker Dunham Theater and Gallery

Cast and Crew:

Jack Worthing, J.P. - Nicole Caron

Algernon Moncrieff - Elliot Vigue

Gwendolen Fairfax - Olivia McNeely

Cecily Cardew - Eden Gorst

Lady Augusta Bracknell - Geof Dolman

Professor Prism - Aubrey Clowndinst

Rev. Caroline Chasuble, D.D. - Katy Peterson

Moulton Merriman/Lane - Patrick Caron

Director: CC

Assistant/Movement Director: Aubery Clinedinst

When Oscar Wilde wrote the importance of being earnest. He didn't know how loved and widely performed it would be. In fact the trial that would see him jailed and later exiled to france. Forced the plays initial west end run to close. He spent the last few years of his life trying to get it published. Due to his conviction of homosexual behavior he was an anathema to theater. Publishers one by one refused. Finely in 1898 just before Wildes death, Leo Smithers agreed to publish. The first edition wouldn't come out until the next year after Wilde had passed away. The original publication went uncredited, denoting instead "by the author of Lady Windermere's Fan". Since its original run it has been revived at least 20 times in professional theaters in the uk and countless thousands of times by professional and amateur theaters around the world. This production is proud to be another revival. This play's general popularity, public domain status, and small cast can often lead to over saturation in the market. Much in the same way that you can always find a local midsummers night, hamlet, or romeo and Juliet performance to watch near you. It is just as likely that you will see this play crop up within a short drive. With her 20+years of theater experience our director CC has performed in many versions of Earnest. By and large she has found that most productions perform the play as a period piece. As of yet attempts to modernize the productions often end up stripping the show of its life and humor. CC has taken inspiration from the Baz Luhrmann 1996 film version of Romeo and Juliet. While the Text has been edited some for time and clarity. The material and language of this production of Earnest largely remains the same But with a twist. Everything takes place in the year 2023. Some of the characters communicate via text message. One of the butlers has been transformed into a digital home assistant. Gone is the aristocracy. It has been replaced by Lady Bracknell as the CEO of a fortune 500 company, her adopted daughter a Regina George mean girl. Algernon is a non-binary middle class black sheep who has just received some interesting 23 and me results. Cecily is a unique young person who is figuring out Life while authoring erotic friend fiction. Professor Prism, who was once a wild party person, has begrudgingly gone sober and dedicated their life to education. Caroline Chasuble rev. Is a priest who, having not experienced any of the pleasures of the flesh finds herself in desperate need. Jack/Johanna is still as long suffering as ever and just wants to end all of the lies and settle down with Gwendolen. With Merriman the butler dragged along kicking and screaming at butter knifepoint. This aggressively modern adaptation is one you don't want to miss.

Algernon: (Picks up envelope and scans it with phone)

LANE: (do Doot) Would you like me to read your “Chromosome and You” results? (Doot)

Algernon: Absolutely!

LANE: (Do Doot) One moment… Processing your results… You are White. 77.3% British and Irish, and 11% French and German. You have trace genetics from West Africa, the Levantine coast, and the Americas. Would you like to hear who your closest relatives are? (Doot)

Algernon: Sure, why not!

LANE: (Do Doot) According to “Chromosome and You” That will Be an additional 4 payments of $19.99. Do you wish to continue? (Doot)

Algernon: (deep sigh) I'm probably going to regret this. Or at the very least my funds will. Yes, let here them.

LANE: (Do Doot) Processing your Payment… Your available family tree is as follows… Most of the entries have been provided by user LadyB. Your mother was Susan Moncrieff Now deceased. Your Maiden Aunt Lady Augusta Bracknell, Her Husband Lord Gerald Bracknell, their adopted Daughter Gwendolen Fairfax. There is One additional Entry from User JoMamma1994. Your Sister Joanna Worthing. (Doot)

Algernon: (Perks Up) I'm Sorry what was that last entry.

LANE: (Do Doot) You have a genetic Sister named Joanna Worthing. There is no one able to contact at this time no Users have accessed this portal in the last 5 years. (Doot)

Algernon: (runs out of the room grabs the wallet cackles at it briefly back onstage tosses it through the door and excitedly shuts it. They then return to their game Shredding to whatever song comes up next on the playlist.)

Algernon. Did you hear what I was playing, Lane?

Lane. [Do Doot Sound] I didn't think it polite to listen, sir. [Doot]

Algernon. I'm sorry for that, for your sake. I don't play accurately—anyone can play accurately—but I play with wonderful expressions. As far as the piano is concerned, sentiment is my forte. I keep science for Life.

Lane. [Do Doot Sound] Okay. [Doot]

Algernon. And, speaking of the science of Life, have you got the cucumber sandwiches cut for Lady Bracknell?

Lane. [Do Doot Sound] Yes. [Doot, doorbell rings ‘delivery man' Hands them on a salver.]

Algernon. [Inspects them, tips, closes the door, takes two, and sits down on the sofa.] Oh! . . . by the way, Lane, I see from your book that on Thursday night, when Lord Shoreman and Mr. Worthing were dining with me, eight bottles of champagne were entered as having been consumed.

Lane. [Do Doot Sound] Yes, sir; eight bottles and a pint.[Doot]

Algernon. Why is it that? I ask merely for information.

Lane. [Do Doot Sound] According to the Web, it is attributed to the superior quality of the wine. A quote from Oscar Wilde. “I have often observed that in married households the champagne is rarely of a first-rate brand.”

Algernon. Good heavens! Is marriage so demoralising as that?

Lane. [Do Doyot Sound] I believe it is a very pleasant state. I have had no experience of it myself. [Doot]

Algernon. Very natural, I am sure. That will do, Lane, thank you. [Algernon Begins playing their game again]

Jack. [Kramers in no knocking or anything and, best friend style, gently smacks Algernon on the side of their head to throw off their game.]

Algernon. [should in feeling translate roughly to “F*** You dude! Why are you in my house?” in the way one says such a thing to their best friend] How are you, my dear Ernest? What brings you up to town?

Jack. Oh, pleasure, pleasure! What else should bring one anywhere? Eating as usual, I see, Algy!

Algernon. [Stiffly.] I believe it is customary in good society to take some slight refreshment at five o'clock. Where have you been since last Thursday?

Jack. [Sitting down on the sofa.] In the country.

Algernon. What on earth do you do there?

Jack. When one is in town one amuses oneself. When one is in the country one amuses other people. It is excessively boring.

Algernon. And who are the people you amuse?

Jack. [Airily.] Oh, neighbors, neighbors.

Algernon. Got nice neighbors in your part of Shropshire?

Jack. Eh… Why all these cups? Why cucumber sandwiches? Who is coming to tea?

Algernon. Oh! merely Aunt Augusta and Gwendolen.

Jack. How perfectly delightful!

Algernon. Yes, that is all very well; but I am afraid Aunt Augusta won't quite approve of your being here.

Jack. May I ask why?

Algernon. My dear fellow, the way you flirt with Gwendolen is perfectly disgraceful. It is almost as bad as the way Gwendolen flirts with you.

Jack. I am in love with Gwendolen. I have come up to town expressly to propose to her.

Algernon. I thought you had come up for pleasure? . . . I call that business.

Jack. How utterly unromantic you are!

Algernon. I really don't see anything romantic in proposing. It is very romantic to be in love. But there is nothing romantic about a definite proposal. Why, one may be accepted. One usually is, I believe. Then the excitement is all over. The very essence of romance is uncertainty. If ever I get married, I'll certainly try to forget the fact.

Jack. I have no doubt about that, dear Algy. The Divorce Court was specially invented for people whose memories are so curiously constituted.

Algernon. Oh! there is no use speculating on that subject. Divorces are made in Heaven—[Jack puts out his hand to take a sandwich. Algernon at once interferes.] Please don't touch the cucumber sandwiches. They are ordered specially for Aunt Augusta. [Takes one and eats it.]

Jack. Well, you have been eating them all the time.

Algernon. That is quite a different matter. She is my aunt. [Takes plate from below.] Have some bread and butter. The bread and butter is for Gwendolen. She is devoted to bread and butter.

Jack. [Advancing to table and helping himself.] And very good bread and butter it is too.

Algernon. You need not eat as if you were going to eat it all. You behave as if you were married to her already. You are not married to her already, and I don't think you ever will be.

Jack. Why on earth do you say that?

Algernon. Well, in the first place girls never marry the folk they flirt with. They don't think it right.

Jack. Oh, that is nonsense!

Algernon. It isn't. It is a great truth. In the second place, I don't give my consent.

Jack. Your consent!

Algernon. My dear… fellow, Gwendolen is my first cousin. And before I allow you to marry her, you will have to clear up the whole question of Cecily.

Jack. Cecily! What on earth do you mean? What do you mean, Algy, by Cecily! I don't know anyone of the name of Cecily.

Algernon. Lane [Do Doot Sound] Where did I place the cigarette case Mr. Worthing left in the smoking-room the last time he dined here.

Lane. On the bookshelf, sir. [Doot, Algernon goes to bookshelf and picks up wallet]

Jack. Do you mean to say you have had my cigarette case all this time? I wish to goodness you had let me know. I have been writing frantic letters to Scotland Yard about it. I was very nearly offering a large reward.

Algernon. Well, I wish you would offer one. I happen to be more than usually hard up.

Jack. There is no good offering a large reward now that the thing is found.

Algernon. I think that is rather mean of you, Ernest, I must say. However, it makes no matter, for, now that I look at the inscription inside, I find that the thing isn't yours after all.

Jack. Of course it's mine. [Moving to him.] You have seen me with it a hundred times, and you have no right whatsoever to read what is written inside. It is a very ungentlemanly thing to read a private cigarette case. I simply want it back.

Algernon. Yes; but this isn't your cigarette case. This cigarette case is a present from someone of the name of Cecily, and you said you didn't know any one of that name.

Jack. Well, if you want to know, Cecily happens to be my aunt.

Algernon. Your aunt!

Jack. Yes. Charming old lady she is, too. Lives at Tunbridge Wells. Just give it back to me, Algy.

Algernon. [Retreating to back of sofa.] But why do they call themself little Cecily if they are your aunt who lives at Tunbridge Wells? [Reading.] ‘From little Cecily with their fondest love.'

Jack. [Moving to sofa and kneeling upon it.] My dear fellow, what on earth is there in that? Some aunts are tall, some aunts are not tall. That is a matter that surely an aunt may be allowed to decide for herself. For Heaven's sake give me back my cigarette case. [Follows Algernon round the room.]

Algernon. Yes. But why does your aunt call you their Aunt? ‘From little Cecily, with their fondest love to their dear Auntie Jack.' There is no objection, I admit, to an aunt being a small aunt, but why an aunt, no matter what their size may be, should call their own… nephew their Aunt, I can't quite make out. Besides, your name isn't Jack at all; it is Ernest.

Jack. It isn't Ernest; it's Jack.

Algernon. You have always told me it was Ernest. I have introduced you to everyone as Ernest. You answer to the name of Ernest. You look as if your name was Ernest. You are the most earnest-looking person I ever saw in my life. It is perfectly absurd your saying that your name isn't Ernest. [looks at phone pulls up facebook profile] ‘Mr. Ernest Worthing, B. 4, The Albany.'

Jack. Well, my name is Ernest in town and Jack in the country, and the cigarette case was given to me in the country.

Algernon. Yes, but that does not account for the fact that your small Aunt Cecily, who lives at Tunbridge Wells, calls you their dear Auntie. You had much better have the thing out at once. I may mention that I have always suspected you of being a confirmed and secret Bunburyist; and I am quite sure of it now.

Jack. Bunburyist? What on earth do you mean by a Bunburyist?

Algernon. I'll reveal to you the meaning of that incomparable expression as soon as you are kind enough to inform me why you are Ernest in town and Jack in the country.

Jack. Well, produce my cigarette case first.

Algernon. [childishly licks then Hands over wallet]

Jack. The fact is this, Old Mr. Thomas Cardew, who adopted me when I was a little boy, made me in his will guardian to his grand-child, Cecily Cardew. Cecily, who addresses me as their aunt from motives of respect that you could not possibly appreciate, lives at my place in the country under the charge of Their admirable tutor, professor Prism.

Algernon. Where is that place in the country, by the way?

Jack. That is nothing to you. You are not going to be invited . . . I may tell you candidly that the place is not in Shropshire.

Algernon. I suspected that, go on. Why are you Ernest in town and Jack in the country?

Jack. My dear Algy, When one is placed in the position of guardian, one has to adopt a very high moral tone on all subjects. It's one's duty to do so. And as a high moral tone can hardly be said to conduce very much to either one's health or one's happiness, in order to get up to town I have always pretended to have a younger brother of the name of Ernest, who lives in the Albany, and gets into the most dreadful scrapes. That, my dear Algy, is the whole truth pure and simple.

Algernon. The truth is rarely pure and never simple. I was quite right in saying you were a Bunburyist. You are one of the most advanced Bunburyists I know.

Jack. What on earth do you mean?

Algernon. You have

Here is the Full version

I

LADY SUSAN VERNON TO MR. VERNON

Langford, Dec.

MY DEAR BROTHER,—I can no longer refuse myself the pleasure of profiting by your kind invitation when we last parted of spending some weeks with you at Churchhill, and, therefore, if quite convenient to you and Mrs. Vernon to receive me at present, I shall hope within a few days to be introduced to a sister whom I have so long desired to be acquainted with. My kind friends here are most affectionately urgent with me to prolong my stay, but their hospitable and cheerful dispositions lead them too much into society for my present situation and state of mind; and I impatiently look forward to the hour when I shall be admitted into your delightful retirement.

I long to be made known to your dear little children, in whose hearts I shall be very eager to secure an interest I shall soon have need for all my fortitude, as I am on the point of separation from my own daughter. The long illness of her dear father prevented my paying her that attention which duty and affection equally dictated, and I have too much reason to fear that the governess to whose care I consigned her was unequal to the charge. I have therefore resolved on placing her at one of the best private schools in town, where I shall have an opportunity of leaving her myself in my way to you. I am determined, you see, not to be denied admittance at Churchhill. It would indeed give me most painful sensations to know that it were not in your power to receive me.

Your most obliged and affectionate sister,

S. VERNON.

II

LADY SUSAN VERNON TO MRS. JOHNSON

Langford.

You were mistaken, my dear Alicia, in supposing me fixed at this place for the rest of the winter: it grieves me to say how greatly you were mistaken, for I have seldom spent three months more agreeably than those which have just flown away. At present, nothing goes smoothly; the females of the family are united against me. You foretold how it would be when I first came to Langford, and Mainwaring is so uncommonly pleasing that I was not without apprehensions for myself. I remember saying to myself, as I drove to the house, "I like this man, pray Heaven no harm come of it!" But I was determined to be discreet, to bear in mind my being only four months a widow, and to be as quiet as possible: and I have been so, my dear creature; I have admitted no one's attentions but Mainwaring's. I have avoided all general flirtation whatever; I have distinguished no creature besides, of all the numbers resorting hither, except Sir James Martin, on whom I bestowed a little notice, in order to detach him from Miss Mainwaring; but, if the world could know my motive THERE they would honour me. I have been called an unkind mother, but it was the sacred impulse of maternal affection, it was the advantage of my daughter that led me on; and if that daughter were not the greatest simpleton on earth, I might have been rewarded for my exertions as I ought.

Sir James did make proposals to me for Frederica; but Frederica, who was born to be the torment of my life, chose to set herself so violently against the match that I thought it better to lay aside the scheme for the present. I have more than once repented that I did not marry him myself; and were he but one degree less contemptibly weak I certainly should: but I must own myself rather romantic in that respect, and that riches only will not satisfy me. The event of all this is very provoking: Sir James is gone, Maria highly incensed, and Mrs. Mainwaring insupportably jealous; so jealous, in short, and so enraged against me, that, in the fury of her temper, I should not be surprized at her appealing to her guardian, if she had the liberty of addressing him: but there your husband stands my friend; and the kindest, most amiable action of his life was his throwing her off for ever on her marriage. Keep up his resentment, therefore, I charge you. We are now in a sad state; no house was ever more altered; the whole party are at war, and Mainwaring scarcely dares speak to me. It is time for me to be gone; I have therefore determined on leaving them, and shall spend, I hope, a comfortable day with you in town within this week. If I am as little in favour with Mr. Johnson as ever, you must come to me at 10 Wigmore street; but I hope this may not be the case, for as Mr. Johnson, with all his faults, is a man to whom that great word "respectable" is always given, and I am known to be so intimate with his wife, his slighting me has an awkward look.

I take London in my way to that insupportable spot, a country village; for I am really going to Churchhill. Forgive me, my dear friend, it is my last resource. Were there another place in England open to me I would prefer it. Charles Vernon is my aversion; and I am afraid of his wife. At Churchhill, however, I must remain till I have something better in view. My young lady accompanies me to town, where I shall deposit her under the care of Miss Summers, in Wigmore street, till she becomes a little more reasonable. She will made good connections there, as the girls are all of the best families. The price is immense, and much beyond what I can ever attempt to pay.

Adieu, I will send you a line as soon as I arrive in town.

Yours ever,

S. VERNON.

III

MRS. VERNON TO LADY DE COURCY

Churchhill.

My dear Mother,—I am very sorry to tell you that it will not be in our power to keep our promise of spending our Christmas with you; and we are prevented that happiness by a circumstance which is not likely to make us any amends. Lady Susan, in a letter to her brother-in-law, has declared her intention of visiting us almost immediately; and as such a visit is in all probability merely an affair of convenience, it is impossible to conjecture its length. I was by no means prepared for such an event, nor can I now account for her ladyship's conduct; Langford appeared so exactly the place for her in every respect, as well from the elegant and expensive style of living there, as from her particular attachment to Mr. Mainwaring, that I was very far from expecting so speedy a distinction, though I always imagined from her increasing friendship for us since her husband's death that we should, at some future period, be obliged to receive her. Mr. Vernon, I think, was a great deal too kind to her when he was in Staffordshire; her behaviour to him, independent of her general character, has been so inexcusably artful and ungenerous since our marriage was first in agitation that no one less amiable and mild than himself could have overlooked it all; and though, as his brother's widow, and in narrow circumstances, it was proper to render her pecuniary assistance, I cannot help thinking his pressing invitation to her to visit us at Churchhill perfectly unnecessary. Disposed, however, as he always is to think the best of everyone, her display of grief, and professions of regret, and general resolutions of prudence, were sufficient to soften his heart and make him really confide in her sincerity; but, as for myself, I am still unconvinced, and plausibly as her ladyship has now written, I cannot make up my mind till I better understand her real meaning in coming to us. You may guess, therefore, my dear madam, with what feelings I look forward to her arrival. She will have occasion for all those attractive powers for which she is celebrated to gain any share of my regard; and I shall certainly endeavour to guard myself against their influence, if not accompanied by something more substantial. She expresses a most eager desire of being acquainted with me, and makes very gracious mention of my children but I am not quite weak enough to suppose a woman who has behaved with inattention, if not with unkindness, to her own child, should be attached to any of mine. Miss Vernon is to be placed at a school in London before her mother comes to us which I am glad of, for her sake and my own. It must be to her advantage to be separated from her mother, and a girl of sixteen who has received so wretched an education, could not be a very desirable companion here. Reginald has long wished, I know, to see the captivating Lady Susan, and we shall depend on his joining our party soon. I am glad to hear that my father continues so well; and am, with best love, &c.,

CATHERINE VERNON.

IV

MR. DE COURCY TO MRS. VERNON

Parklands.

My dear Sister,—I congratulate you and Mr. Vernon on being about to receive into your family the most accomplished coquette in England. As a very distinguished flirt I have always been taught to consider her, but it has lately fallen in my way to hear some particulars of her conduct at Langford: which prove that she does not confine herself to that sort of honest flirtation which satisfies most people, but aspires to the more delicious gratification of making a whole family miserable. By her behaviour to Mr. Mainwaring she gave jealousy and wretchedness to his wife, and by her attentions to a young man previously attached to Mr. Mainwaring's sister deprived an amiable girl of her lover.

I learnt all this from Mr. Smith, now in this neighbourhood (I have dined with him, at Hurst and Wilford), who is just come from Langford where he was a fortnight with her ladyship, and who is therefore well qualified to make the communication.

What a woman she must be! I long to see her, and shall certainly accept your kind invitation, that I may form some idea of those bewitching powers which can do so much—engaging at the same time, and in the same house, the affections of two men, who were neither of them at liberty to bestow them—and all this without the charm of youth! I am glad to find Miss Vernon does not accompany her mother to Churchhill, as she has not even manners to recommend her; and, according to Mr. Smith's account, is equally dull and proud. Where pride and stupidity unite there can be no dissimulation worthy notice, and Miss Vernon shall be consigned to unrelenting contempt; but by all that I can gather Lady Susan possesses a degree of captivating deceit which it must be pleasing to witness and detect. I shall be with you very soon, and am ever,

Your affectionate brother,

R. DE COURCY.

V

LADY SUSAN VERNON TO MRS. JOHNSON

Churchhill.

I received your note, my dear Alicia, just before I left town, and rejoice to be assured that Mr. Johnson suspected nothing of your engagement the evening before. It is undoubtedly better to deceive him entirely, and since he will be stubborn he must be tricked. I arrived here in safety, and have no reason to complain of my reception from Mr. Vernon; but I confess myself not equally satisfied with the behaviour of his lady. She is perfectly well-bred, indeed, and has the air of a woman of fashion, but her manners are not such as can persuade me of her being prepossessed in my favour. I wanted her to be delighted at seeing me. I was as amiable as possible on the occasion, but all in vain. She does not like me. To be sure when we consider that I DID take some pains to prevent my brother-in-law's marrying her, this want of cordiality is not very surprizing, and yet it shows an illiberal and vindictive spirit to resent a project which influenced me six years ago, and which never succeeded at last.

I am sometimes disposed to repent that I did not let Charles buy Vernon Castle, when we were obliged to sell it; but it was a trying circumstance, especially as the sale took place exactly at the time of his marriage; and everybody ought to respect the delicacy of those feelings which could not endure that my husband's dignity should be lessened by his younger brother's having possession of the family estate. Could matters have been so arranged as to prevent the necessity of our leaving the castle, could we have lived with Charles and kept him single, I should have been very far from persuading my husband to dispose of it elsewhere; but Charles was on the point of marrying Miss De Courcy, and the event has justified me. Here are children in abundance, and what benefit could have accrued to me from his purchasing Vernon? My having prevented it may perhaps have given his wife an unfavourable impression, but where there is a disposition to dislike, a motive will never be wanting; and as to money matters it has not withheld him from being very useful to me. I really have a regard for him, he is so easily imposed upon! The house is a good one, the furniture fashionable, and everything announces plenty and elegance. Charles is very rich I am sure; when a man has once got his name in a banking-house he rolls in money; but they do not know what to do with it, keep very little company, and never go to London but on business. We shall be as stupid as possible. I mean to win my sister-in-law's heart through the children; I know all their names already, and am going to attach myself with the greatest sensibility to one in particular, a young Frederic, whom I take on my lap and sigh over for his dear uncle's sake.

Poor Mainwaring! I need not tell you how much I miss him, how perpetually he is in my thoughts. I found a dismal letter from him on my arrival here, full of complaints of his wife and sister, and lamentations on the cruelty of his fate. I passed off the letter as his wife's, to the Vernons, and when I write to him it must be under cover to you.

Ever yours, S. VERNON.

VI

MRS. VERNON TO MR. DE COURCY

Churchhill.

Well, my dear Reginald, I have seen this dangerous creature, and must give you some description of her, though I hope you will soon be able to form your own judgment. She is really excessively pretty; however you may choose to question the allurements of a lady no longer young, I must, for my own part, declare that I have seldom seen so lovely a woman as Lady Susan. She is delicately fair, with fine grey eyes and dark eyelashes; and from her appearance one would not suppose her more than five and twenty, though she must in fact be ten years older, I was certainly not disposed to admire her, though always hearing she was beautiful; but I cannot help feeling that she possesses an uncommon union of symmetry, brilliancy, and grace. Her address to me was so gentle, frank, and even affectionate, that, if I had not known how much she has always disliked me for marrying Mr. Vernon, and that we had never met before, I should have imagined her an attached friend. One is apt, I believe, to connect assurance of manner with coquetry, and to expect that an impudent address will naturally attend an impudent mind; at least I was myself prepared for an improper degree of confidence in Lady Susan; but her countenance is absolutely sweet, and her voice and manner winningly mild. I am sorry it is so, for what is this but deceit? Unfortunately, one knows her too well. She is clever and agreeable, has all that knowledge of the world which makes conversation easy, and talks very well, with a happy command of language,

Hello Listeners,

Sorry for the Late Uploads The world got away from me this week. Tonight will conclude Lady Susan with episodes 25-42 being uploaded ASAP

The recomended age for this book is 16+ younger listeners may hear it, as there is no vulger language, but may not understand the nuance of what is happening.

As of 5/30/2021 i have been laid off of my job for ball park one month. I make these podcasts entirely out of my own wallet and though production costs arn't the biggest thing in the universe they do make up a large chunk of my income when i have a job. So please consider throwing us a little financial support if you like what i do and you want to see our little channels grow and improve.

Patreon https://www.patreon.com/FunFactsWith

RedBubble shop FunFactsWith.redbubble.com

or heck even Venmo @vlogwonderland

In other news we are looking for more guests. so if you want to be on the show or if you represent a celebrity, scientist, or other expert who would like to come on the show for free. Please fill out the google form here https://forms.gle/uTgyjhxp248mMKZK7

If you are looking for something to listen to Please check out our sister podcast at Funfactswith.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/FunFactsWith

Twitter

@FunFactsWith1

Instagram

@funfactswith

Tiktok

@Funfactswith

Read Along Below

This correspondence, by a meeting between some of the parties, and a separation between the others, could not, to the great detriment of the Post Office revenue, be continued any longer. Very little assistance to the State could be derived from the epistolary intercourse of Mrs. Vernon and her niece; for the former soon perceived, by the style of Frederica's letters, that they were written under her mother's inspection! and therefore, deferring all particular enquiry till she could make it personally in London, ceased writing minutely or often. Having learnt enough, in the meanwhile, from her open-hearted brother, of what had passed between him and Lady Susan to sink the latter lower than ever in her opinion, she was proportionably more anxious to get Frederica removed from such a mother, and placed under her own care; and, though with little hope of success, was resolved to leave nothing unattempted that might offer a chance of obtaining her sister-in-law's consent to it. Her anxiety on the subject made her press for an early visit to London; and Mr. Vernon, who, as it must already have appeared, lived only to do whatever he was desired, soon found some accommodating business to call him thither. With a heart full of the matter, Mrs. Vernon waited on Lady Susan shortly after her arrival in town, and was met with such an easy and cheerful affection, as made her almost turn from her with horror. No remembrance of Reginald, no consciousness of guilt, gave one look of embarrassment; she was in excellent spirits, and seemed eager to show at once by ever possible attention to her brother and sister her sense of their kindness, and her pleasure in their society. Frederica was no more altered than Lady Susan; the same restrained manners, the same timid look in the presence of her mother as heretofore, assured her aunt of her situation being uncomfortable, and confirmed her in the plan of altering it. No unkindness, however, on the part of Lady Susan appeared. Persecution on the subject of Sir James was entirely at an end; his name merely mentioned to say that he was not in London; and indeed, in all her conversation, she was solicitous only for the welfare and improvement of her daughter, acknowledging, in terms of grateful delight, that Frederica was now growing every day more and more what a parent could desire. Mrs. Vernon, surprized and incredulous, knew not what to suspect, and, without any change in her own views, only feared greater difficulty in accomplishing them. The first hope of anything better was derived from Lady Susan's asking her whether she thought Frederica looked quite as well as she had done at Churchhill, as she must confess herself to have sometimes an anxious doubt of London's perfectly agreeing with her. Mrs. Vernon, encouraging the doubt, directly proposed her niece's returning with them into the country. Lady Susan was unable to express her sense of such kindness, yet knew not, from a variety of reasons, how to part with her daughter; and as, though her own plans were not yet wholly fixed, she trusted it would ere long be in her power to take Frederica into the country herself, concluded by declining entirely to profit by such unexampled attention. Mrs. Vernon persevered, however, in the offer of it, and though Lady Susan continued to resist, her resistance in the course of a few days seemed somewhat less formidable. The lucky alarm of an influenza decided what might not have been decided quite so soon. Lady Susan's maternal fears were then too much awakened for her to think of anything but Frederica's removal from the risk of infection; above all disorders in the world she most dreaded the influenza for her daughter's constitution!

Frederica returned to Churchhill with her uncle and aunt; and three weeks afterwards, Lady Susan announced her being married to Sir James Martin. Mrs. Vernon was then convinced of what she had only suspected before, that she might have spared herself all the trouble of urging a removal which Lady Susan had doubtless resolved on from the first. Frederica's visit was nominally for six weeks, but her mother, though inviting her to return in one or two affectionate letters, was very ready to oblige the whole party by consenting to a prolongation of her stay, and in the course of two months ceased to write of her absence, and in the course of two or more to write to her at all. Frederica was therefore fixed in the family of her uncle and aunt till such time as Reginald De Courcy could be talked, flattered, and finessed into an affection for her which, allowing leisure for the conquest of his attachment to her mother, for his abjuring all future attachments, and detesting the sex, might be reasonably looked for in the course of a twelvemonth. Three months might have done it in general, but Reginald's feelings were no less lasting than lively. Whether Lady Susan was or was not happy in her second choice, I do not see how it can ever be ascertained; for who would take her assurance of it on either side of the question? The world must judge from probabilities; she had nothing against her but her husband, and her conscience. Sir James may seem to have drawn a harder lot than mere folly merited; I leave him, therefore, to all the pity that anybody can give him. For myself, I confess that I can pity only Miss Mainwaring; who, coming to town, and putting herself to an expense in clothes which impoverished her for two years, on purpose to secure him, was defrauded of her due by a woman ten years older than herself.

Hello Listeners,

Sorry for the Late Uploads The world got away from me this week. Tonight will conclude Lady Susan with episodes 25-42 being uploaded ASAP

The recomended age for this book is 16+ younger listeners may hear it, as there is no vulger language, but may not understand the nuance of what is happening.

As of 5/30/2021 i have been laid off of my job for ball park one month. I make these podcasts entirely out of my own wallet and though production costs arn't the biggest thing in the universe they do make up a large chunk of my income when i have a job. So please consider throwing us a little financial support if you like what i do and you want to see our little channels grow and improve.

Patreon https://www.patreon.com/FunFactsWith

RedBubble shop FunFactsWith.redbubble.com

or heck even Venmo @vlogwonderland

In other news we are looking for more guests. so if you want to be on the show or if you represent a celebrity, scientist, or other expert who would like to come on the show for free. Please fill out the google form here https://forms.gle/uTgyjhxp248mMKZK7

If you are looking for something to listen to Please check out our sister podcast at Funfactswith.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/FunFactsWith

Twitter

@FunFactsWith1

Instagram

@funfactswith

Tiktok

@Funfactswith

Read Along Below

MRS. VERNON TO LADY DE COURCY

Churchhill.

My dear Mother,—Your letter has surprized me beyond measure! Can it be true that they are really separated—and for ever? I should be overjoyed if I dared depend on it, but after all that I have seen how can one be secure. And Reginald really with you! My surprize is the greater because on Wednesday, the very day of his coming to Parklands, we had a most unexpected and unwelcome visit from Lady Susan, looking all cheerfulness and good-humour, and seeming more as if she were to marry him when she got to London than as if parted from him for ever. She stayed nearly two hours, was as affectionate and agreeable as ever, and not a syllable, not a hint was dropped, of any disagreement or coolness between them. I asked her whether she had seen my brother since his arrival in town; not, as you may suppose, with any doubt of the fact, but merely to see how she looked. She immediately answered, without any embarrassment, that he had been kind enough to call on her on Monday; but she believed he had already returned home, which I was very far from crediting. Your kind invitation is accepted by us with pleasure, and on Thursday next we and our little ones will be with you. Pray heaven, Reginald may not be in town again by that time! I wish we could bring dear Frederica too, but I am sorry to say that her mother's errand hither was to fetch her away; and, miserable as it made the poor girl, it was impossible to detain her. I was thoroughly unwilling to let her go, and so was her uncle; and all that could be urged we did urge; but Lady Susan declared that as she was now about to fix herself in London for several months, she could not be easy if her daughter were not with her for masters, &c. Her manner, to be sure, was very kind and proper, and Mr. Vernon believes that Frederica will now be treated with affection. I wish I could think so too. The poor girl's heart was almost broke at taking leave of us. I charged her to write to me very often, and to remember that if she were in any distress we should be always her friends. I took care to see her alone, that I might say all this, and I hope made her a little more comfortable; but I shall not be easy till I can go to town and judge of her situation myself. I wish there were a better prospect than now appears of the match which the conclusion of your letter declares your expectations of. At present, it is not very likely,

Yours ever, &c.,

C. VERNON

Hello Listeners,

Sorry for the Late Uploads The world got away from me this week. Tonight will conclude Lady Susan with episodes 25-42 being uploaded ASAP

The recomended age for this book is 16+ younger listeners may hear it, as there is no vulger language, but may not understand the nuance of what is happening.

As of 5/30/2021 i have been laid off of my job for ball park one month. I make these podcasts entirely out of my own wallet and though production costs arn't the biggest thing in the universe they do make up a large chunk of my income when i have a job. So please consider throwing us a little financial support if you like what i do and you want to see our little channels grow and improve.

Patreon https://www.patreon.com/FunFactsWith

RedBubble shop FunFactsWith.redbubble.com

or heck even Venmo @vlogwonderland

In other news we are looking for more guests. so if you want to be on the show or if you represent a celebrity, scientist, or other expert who would like to come on the show for free. Please fill out the google form here https://forms.gle/uTgyjhxp248mMKZK7

If you are looking for something to listen to Please check out our sister podcast at Funfactswith.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/FunFactsWith

Twitter

@FunFactsWith1

Instagram

@funfactswith

Tiktok

@Funfactswith

Read Along Below

LADY DE COURCY TO MRS. VERNON

My dear Catherine,—I have charming news for you, and if I had not sent off my letter this morning you might have been spared the vexation of knowing of Reginald's being gone to London, for he is returned. Reginald is returned, not to ask our consent to his marrying Lady Susan, but to tell us they are parted for ever. He has been only an hour in the house, and I have not been able to learn particulars, for he is so very low that I have not the heart to ask questions, but I hope we shall soon know all. This is the most joyful hour he has ever given us since the day of his birth. Nothing is wanting but to have you here, and it is our particular wish and entreaty that you would come to us as soon as you can. You have owed us a visit many long weeks; I hope nothing will make it inconvenient to Mr. Vernon; and pray bring all my grand-children; and your dear niece is included, of course; I long to see her. It has been a sad, heavy winter hitherto, without Reginald, and seeing nobody from Churchhill. I never found the season so dreary before; but this happy meeting will make us young again. Frederica runs much in my thoughts, and when Reginald has recovered his usual good spirits (as I trust he soon will) we will try to rob him of his heart once more, and I am full of hopes of seeing their hands joined at no great distance.

Your affectionate mother,

C. DE COURCY

Hello Listeners,

Sorry for the Late Uploads The world got away from me this week. Tonight will conclude Lady Susan with episodes 25-42 being uploaded ASAP

The recomended age for this book is 16+ younger listeners may hear it, as there is no vulger language, but may not understand the nuance of what is happening.

As of 5/30/2021 i have been laid off of my job for ball park one month. I make these podcasts entirely out of my own wallet and though production costs arn't the biggest thing in the universe they do make up a large chunk of my income when i have a job. So please consider throwing us a little financial support if you like what i do and you want to see our little channels grow and improve.

Patreon https://www.patreon.com/FunFactsWith

RedBubble shop FunFactsWith.redbubble.com

or heck even Venmo @vlogwonderland

In other news we are looking for more guests. so if you want to be on the show or if you represent a celebrity, scientist, or other expert who would like to come on the show for free. Please fill out the google form here https://forms.gle/uTgyjhxp248mMKZK7

If you are looking for something to listen to Please check out our sister podcast at Funfactswith.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/FunFactsWith

Twitter

@FunFactsWith1

Instagram

@funfactswith

Tiktok

@Funfactswith

Read Along Below

LADY SUSAN TO MRS. JOHNSON

Upper Seymour Street.

My dear Alicia,—I yield to the necessity which parts us. Under circumstances you could not act otherwise. Our friendship cannot be impaired by it, and in happier times, when your situation is as independent as mine, it will unite us again in the same intimacy as ever. For this I shall impatiently wait, and meanwhile can safely assure you that I never was more at ease, or better satisfied with myself and everything about me than at the present hour. Your husband I abhor, Reginald I despise, and I am secure of never seeing either again. Have I not reason to rejoice? Mainwaring is more devoted to me than ever; and were we at liberty, I doubt if I could resist even matrimony offered by HIM. This event, if his wife live with you, it may be in your power to hasten. The violence of her feelings, which must wear her out, may be easily kept in irritation. I rely on your friendship for this. I am now satisfied that I never could have brought myself to marry Reginald, and am equally determined that Frederica never shall. To-morrow, I shall fetch her from Churchhill, and let Maria Mainwaring tremble for the consequence. Frederica shall be Sir James's wife before she quits my house, and she may whimper, and the Vernons may storm, I regard them not. I am tired of submitting my will to the caprices of others; of resigning my own judgment in deference to those to whom I owe no duty, and for whom I feel no respect. I have given up too much, have been too easily worked on, but Frederica shall now feel the difference. Adieu, dearest of friends; may the next gouty attack be more favourable! and may you always regard me as unalterably yours,

S. VERNON

Hello Listeners,

Sorry for the Late Uploads The world got away from me this week. Tonight will conclude Lady Susan with episodes 25-42 being uploaded ASAP

The recomended age for this book is 16+ younger listeners may hear it, as there is no vulger language, but may not understand the nuance of what is happening.

As of 5/30/2021 i have been laid off of my job for ball park one month. I make these podcasts entirely out of my own wallet and though production costs arn't the biggest thing in the universe they do make up a large chunk of my income when i have a job. So please consider throwing us a little financial support if you like what i do and you want to see our little channels grow and improve.

Patreon https://www.patreon.com/FunFactsWith

RedBubble shop FunFactsWith.redbubble.com

or heck even Venmo @vlogwonderland

In other news we are looking for more guests. so if you want to be on the show or if you represent a celebrity, scientist, or other expert who would like to come on the show for free. Please fill out the google form here https://forms.gle/uTgyjhxp248mMKZK7

If you are looking for something to listen to Please check out our sister podcast at Funfactswith.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/FunFactsWith

Twitter

@FunFactsWith1

Instagram

@funfactswith

Tiktok

@Funfactswith

Read Along Below

MRS. JOHNSON TO LADY SUSAN VERNON

Edward Street

I am grieved, though I cannot be astonished at your rupture with Mr. De Courcy; he has just informed Mr. Johnson of it by letter. He leaves London, he says, to-day. Be assured that I partake in all your feelings, and do not be angry if I say that our intercourse, even by letter, must soon be given up. It makes me miserable; but Mr. Johnson vows that if I persist in the connection, he will settle in the country for the rest of his life, and you know it is impossible to submit to such an extremity while any other alternative remains. You have heard of course that the Mainwarings are to part, and I am afraid Mrs. M. will come home to us again; but she is still so fond of her husband, and frets so much about him, that perhaps she may not live long. Miss Mainwaring is just come to town to be with her aunt, and they say that she declares she will have Sir James Martin before she leaves London again. If I were you, I would certainly get him myself. I had almost forgot to give you my opinion of Mr. De Courcy; I am really delighted with him; he is full as handsome, I think, as Mainwaring, and with such an open, good-humoured countenance, that one cannot help loving him at first sight. Mr. Johnson and he are the greatest friends in the world. Adieu, my dearest Susan, I wish matters did not go so perversely. That unlucky visit to Langford! but I dare say you did all for the best, and there is no defying destiny.

Your sincerely attached

ALICIA.

Hello Listeners,

Sorry for the Late Uploads The world got away from me this week. Tonight will conclude Lady Susan with episodes 25-42 being uploaded ASAP

The recomended age for this book is 16+ younger listeners may hear it, as there is no vulger language, but may not understand the nuance of what is happening.

As of 5/30/2021 i have been laid off of my job for ball park one month. I make these podcasts entirely out of my own wallet and though production costs arn't the biggest thing in the universe they do make up a large chunk of my income when i have a job. So please consider throwing us a little financial support if you like what i do and you want to see our little channels grow and improve.

Patreon https://www.patreon.com/FunFactsWith

RedBubble shop FunFactsWith.redbubble.com

or heck even Venmo @vlogwonderland

In other news we are looking for more guests. so if you want to be on the show or if you represent a celebrity, scientist, or other expert who would like to come on the show for free. Please fill out the google form here https://forms.gle/uTgyjhxp248mMKZK7

If you are looking for something to listen to Please check out our sister podcast at Funfactswith.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/FunFactsWith

Twitter

@FunFactsWith1

Instagram

@funfactswith

Tiktok

@Funfactswith

Read Along Below

LADY SUSAN TO MR. DE COURCY

Upper Seymour Street.

I am satisfied, and will trouble you no more when these few lines are dismissed. The engagement which you were eager to form a fortnight ago is no longer compatible with your views, and I rejoice to find that the prudent advice of your parents has not been given in vain. Your restoration to peace will, I doubt not, speedily follow this act of filial obedience, and I flatter myself with the hope of surviving my share in this disappointment.

S. V.

Hello Listeners,

Sorry for the Late Uploads The world got away from me this week. Tonight will conclude Lady Susan with episodes 25-42 being uploaded ASAP

The recomended age for this book is 16+ younger listeners may hear it, as there is no vulger language, but may not understand the nuance of what is happening.

As of 5/30/2021 i have been laid off of my job for ball park one month. I make these podcasts entirely out of my own wallet and though production costs arn't the biggest thing in the universe they do make up a large chunk of my income when i have a job. So please consider throwing us a little financial support if you like what i do and you want to see our little channels grow and improve.

Patreon https://www.patreon.com/FunFactsWith

RedBubble shop FunFactsWith.redbubble.com

or heck even Venmo @vlogwonderland

In other news we are looking for more guests. so if you want to be on the show or if you represent a celebrity, scientist, or other expert who would like to come on the show for free. Please fill out the google form here https://forms.gle/uTgyjhxp248mMKZK7

If you are looking for something to listen to Please check out our sister podcast at Funfactswith.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/FunFactsWith

Twitter

@FunFactsWith1

Instagram

@funfactswith

Tiktok

@Funfactswith

Read Along Below

MR. DE COURCY TO LADY SUSAN

——Hotel.

Why would you write to me? Why do you require particulars? But, since it must be so, I am obliged to declare that all the accounts of your misconduct during the life, and since the death of Mr. Vernon, which had reached me, in common with the world in general, and gained my entire belief before I saw you, but which you, by the exertion of your perverted abilities, had made me resolved to disallow, have been unanswerably proved to me; nay more, I am assured that a connection, of which I had never before entertained a thought, has for some time existed, and still continues to exist, between you and the man whose family you robbed of its peace in return for the hospitality with which you were received into it; that you have corresponded with him ever since your leaving Langford; not with his wife, but with him, and that he now visits you every day. Can you, dare you deny it? and all this at the time when I was an encouraged, an accepted lover! From what have I not escaped! I have only to be grateful. Far from me be all complaint, every sigh of regret. My own folly had endangered me, my preservation I owe to the kindness, the integrity of another; but the unfortunate Mrs. Mainwaring, whose agonies while she related the past seemed to threaten her reason, how is SHE to be consoled! After such a discovery as this, you will scarcely affect further wonder at my meaning in bidding you adieu. My understanding is at length restored, and teaches no less to abhor the artifices which had subdued me than to despise myself for the weakness on which their strength was founded.

R. DE COURCY.

Hello Listeners,

Sorry for the Late Uploads The world got away from me this week. Tonight will conclude Lady Susan with episodes 25-42 being uploaded ASAP

The recomended age for this book is 16+ younger listeners may hear it, as there is no vulger language, but may not understand the nuance of what is happening.

As of 5/30/2021 i have been laid off of my job for ball park one month. I make these podcasts entirely out of my own wallet and though production costs arn't the biggest thing in the universe they do make up a large chunk of my income when i have a job. So please consider throwing us a little financial support if you like what i do and you want to see our little channels grow and improve.

Patreon https://www.patreon.com/FunFactsWith

RedBubble shop FunFactsWith.redbubble.com

or heck even Venmo @vlogwonderland

In other news we are looking for more guests. so if you want to be on the show or if you represent a celebrity, scientist, or other expert who would like to come on the show for free. Please fill out the google form here https://forms.gle/uTgyjhxp248mMKZK7

If you are looking for something to listen to Please check out our sister podcast at Funfactswith.com

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/FunFactsWith

Twitter

@FunFactsWith1

Instagram

@funfactswith

Tiktok

@Funfactswith

Read Along Below

LADY SUSAN TO MR. DE COURCY

Upper Seymour Street.

I will not attempt to describe my astonishment in reading the note this moment received from you. I am bewildered in my endeavours to form some rational conjecture of what Mrs. Mainwaring can have told you to occasion so extraordinary a change in your sentiments. Have I not explained everything to you with respect to myself which could bear a doubtful meaning, and which the ill-nature of the world had interpreted to my discredit? What can you now have heard to stagger your esteem for me? Have I ever had a concealment from you? Reginald, you agitate me beyond expression, I cannot suppose that the old story of Mrs. Mainwaring's jealousy can be revived again, or at least be LISTENED to again. Come to me immediately, and explain what is at present absolutely incomprehensible. Believe me the single word of Langford is not of such potent intelligence as to supersede the necessity of more. If we ARE to part, it will at least be handsome to take your personal leave—but I have little heart to jest; in truth, I am serious enough; for to be sunk, though but for an hour, in your esteem is a humiliation to which I know not how to submit. I shall count every minute till your arrival.

S. V.