Gratitude Through Hard Times

In a time when the headlines are bleak and social feeds are filled with outrage, what does it mean to be deliberately optimistic? In this episode of Gratitude Through Hard Times, host Chris Schembra sits down with returning guest Mattan Griffel, two-time Y Combinator–backed founder, award-winning Columbia Business School professor, and longtime startup coach, to rethink optimism from the inside out.

This isn’t a conversation about pretending everything is fine. It’s a practical, science-backed exploration of how to keep moving forward when the world tries to convince you to freeze. Chris and Mattan unpack the psychology of negativity, including the brain’s nine-to-one negative memory bias, nostalgia’s hidden trap, and how media algorithms profit from fear, and then turn to the tools that can rewire us toward progress and resilience.

Along the way, they revisit some of Mattan’s most powerful ideas: the courage of “naive optimism” that makes founders start companies against impossible odds; serendipity bombs, small outward actions that quietly build networks and opportunity; and the truth that being wrong most of the time is the price of doing something original.

The conversation is both personal and practical. Chris shares stories of producing a two-man play in Beverly Hills under the threat of a record-breaking El Niño storm, and how standing in the room with committed collaborators fueled hope despite fear. Mattan reflects on early YouTube criticism that almost derailed him, and how understanding our negativity bias changed his response to rejection and failure.

Listeners will also hear how positive emotions aren’t just nice-to-have; they’re powerful mental technology. Chris cites Barbara Fredrickson’s “broaden-and-build” research, showing how gratitude, curiosity, and empathy expand our thought–action repertoire, unlock creativity, and make new solutions visible. Together they argue that optimism isn’t fluffy, it’s a survival skill in an age of AI disruption, social media outrage cycles, and cultural pessimism.

By the end of the episode, you’ll have practical habits to invite luck and possibility into your own life: connect generously, say yes early and often, ship ideas at 90% instead of chasing perfection, and create rooms where pessimism can’t dominate. Most importantly, you’ll be reminded that hope is not passive, it’s built one intentional step at a time.

10 Quotes

1. “Optimism isn’t blind faith that everything will be fine, it’s the conviction that progress is buildable.” — Mattan
2. “Our brains take in nine bits of negative information for every one bit of positive. That’s biology, not failure.” — Chris
3. “Nostalgia can be beautiful, but it’s often denial, an inability to process the present.” — Chris
4. “Systems are self-healing if we let them. The line of human progress trends up and to the right, even if it wobbles.” — Mattan
5. “Negativity sells. Each negative word in a headline can boost clicks by 2.3%, but positive words get ignored.” — Chris
6. “You have to be wrong most of the time to create something new. Error tolerance is optimism in action.” — Mattan
7. “The stupid way to be selfish is to seek happiness for yourself alone; the intelligent way is to work for the welfare of others.” — Dalai Lama (quoted by Chris)
8. “Say yes early and often because most conversations won’t go anywhere, but the one that does can change your life.” — Mattan
9. “Progress comes from movement, not perfection. Press go at 90%.” — Chris
10. “Positive emotions broaden your thought–action repertoire, gratitude and curiosity literally rewire your brain for resilience.” — Chris (referencing Barbara Fredrickson)

1. Optimism is a discipline, not a mood. It’s about choosing to believe in forward momentum despite uncertainty.
2. Understand your brain’s negativity bias. We’re wired to remember threats — knowing this can help us reframe and resist doomscrolling.
3. Question nostalgia. Looking back with rose-colored glasses can fuel pessimism about the present.
4. Negativity is profitable — be aware of media incentives. Don’t let clickbait headlines distort your worldview.
5. Design serendipity. Small, outward-focused actions (helping others, showing up, connecting dots) compound over time.
6. Practice error tolerance. Innovation and growth require being wrong most of the time; progress lives in mistakes.
7. Generosity drives returns. Investing in other people — time, knowledge, introductions — creates long-term opportunity and resilience.
8. Say yes more (strategically). Especially early in your journey, embrace exploration; one connection can transform everything.
9. Start before you’re ready. Perfectionism delays progress; ship at 90% and learn in motion.
10. Positive emotions fuel creativity. Simple acts of gratitude, kindness, and curiosity expand your capacity to see solutions and possibilities.

• Adam Mastroianni & Daniel Gilbert’s Nature paper — The illusion of moral decline
• Steven Pinker’s The Better Angels of Our Nature (book summary)
• Tobias Rose-Stockwell — The Outrage Machine
• Upworthy headline negativity study (Columbia Journalism Review)

• Barbara Fredrickson’s “Broaden-and-Build Theory” explainer
• Dalai Lama quote on “intelligent selfishness”
• Adam Grant’s Give and Take

• Mattan Griffel’s Medium essay: “You Have to Be Wrong”
• Mattan Griffel on Designing Serendipity (Forbes)
• How to Build Serendipity in Your Career (Harvard Business Review)

• Chris Schembra’s Rolling Stone column archive
• Ikigai framework explainer
• PwC research on ROI of well-being programs

In this special episode of Gratitude Through Hard Times, host Chris Schembra sits down with Swapnil Shinde, a three-time entrepreneur and the co-founder and CEO of Zeni, the AI-powered finance platform transforming how startups manage their financial operations.

Swapnil’s journey is a story of resilience, risk-taking, and relentless alignment with purpose. He shares how his very first startup—an early Bollywood music streaming service—nearly broke him as he faced late-night calls from music label executives, endless licensing negotiations, and the weight of operating in an industry he barely understood. Instead of giving up, those painful years became his greatest teacher, showing him how to manage stress, build courage, and navigate uncertainty. That experience laid the foundation for his second company, Mezi, an AI travel assistant acquired by American Express, and now his third, Zeni, which is reshaping the future of startup finance.

But what makes Swapnil stand out is not just his entrepreneurial track record. It’s his deep conviction that true success begins on the inside. He describes gratitude as “strength training for your heart” and insists that life must feel good internally before it can ever look good externally. Meditation, mindfulness, and intentional daily rituals are cornerstones of his leadership. He blocks time every morning to ground himself—through Ayurvedic practices, breathwork, and meditation—before leading his team and scaling a company in hypergrowth.

Throughout the conversation, Chris and Swapnil explore how slowing down can actually accelerate growth, why trusting your team and delegating is essential for visionary leadership, and how to separate vanity metrics from what really matters in building sustainable businesses. They also reflect on the dangers of “I’ll be happy when…” thinking, and the freedom that comes when you align with your life’s mission in the present moment.

In a deeply moving section of the episode, Swapnil pays tribute to his late mother, Chaya, an artist who taught him and his twin brother to paint from the age of three. Those lessons in creativity and imagination, he says, were really lessons in how to dream and how to create—skills that became the backbone of his entrepreneurial journey. Speaking in front of one of her paintings during the interview, Swapnil shares how her influence continues to shape his life and leadership.

This episode is a powerful reminder that behind every startup success story is a human being navigating hard times, rewiring through gratitude, and finding strength in stillness. Whether you’re a founder, leader, or simply someone searching for deeper alignment in your own life, Swapnil’s insights will inspire you to pause, reflect, and take bold steps toward building not just a business, but a meaningful legacy.

10 Key Quotes

1. “Gratitude is like strength training for your heart.” – Swapnil Shinde
2. “Slowing down is the best way to run fast.” – Swapnil Shinde
3. “The absence of knowledge teaches you to take risks you’d never take if you knew the pitfalls.” – Swapnil Shinde
4. “If you don’t follow your gut, you will always feel incomplete.” – Swapnil Shinde
5. “Life needs to look good from the inside before it can look good from the outside.” – Swapnil Shinde
6. “The fewer things you have to do, the more time you have to think. The more you think, the more strategic you become.” – Swapnil Shinde
7. “Are you aligned with your life’s mission? If you are, work feels like a hobby.” – Swapnil Shinde
8. “Building sustainable long-term businesses is more important than growth at all costs.” – Swapnil Shinde
9. “My mother taught me to paint at age three—and unknowingly, she taught me how to dream and create.” – Swapnil Shinde
10. “Gratitude journaling and affirmations are a game changer. They rewire your brain toward health and optimism.” – Swapnil Shinde

10 Key Takeaways

1. Hard times can be teachers – painful entrepreneurial experiences build resilience and stress tolerance.
2. Ignorance can be an advantage – not knowing all the risks can free you to take bold leaps.
3. Gut as compass – true alignment comes from following intuition supported by meditation and reflection.
4. Slowing down accelerates progress – stillness, meditation, and focus create clarity and expand time.
5. Morning rituals matter – Swapnil’s daily turmeric-honey-lemon drink, breathwork, and meditation ground his leadership.
6. Delegate and trust your team – great CEOs keep their to-do lists short by empowering 10x leaders.
7. Measure what matters, not vanity metrics – focus on revenue, margins, and automation rates, not money raised or employee count.
8. Sustainable businesses > growth at all costs – the startup landscape has shifted away from reckless scaling.
9. Gratitude is proactive power – journaling and expressing thanks outwardly rewires perspective and culture.
10. Legacy of love – Swapnil’s late mother, Chaya, instilled creativity and resilience that continues to guide his entrepreneurial mission.

Swapnil Shinde is the co-founder and CEO of Zeni, an AI-powered finance platform that automates bookkeeping, bill pay, reimbursements, and CFO-level insights in real time. A three-time entrepreneur, Swapnil co-founded Mezi, an AI-driven travel assistant acquired by American Express, and Dhingana, a Bollywood music streaming service acquired by Rdio. Alongside his identical twin brother Snehal, he has built a reputation as a visionary founder, angel investor, and advisor to AI startups.

When he’s not scaling companies, Swapnil is passionate about Bollywood music, painting, meditation, and empowering entrepreneurs to align their work with their life’s mission.

Learn more about Swapnil and Zeni:

• Zeni Official Website
   
• Swapnil Shinde on LinkedIn
   
• Follow Zeni on LinkedIn

Episode Overview

What does it mean to live a life worth talking about?

In this deeply moving and soul-stirring episode of Gratitude Through Hard Times, host Chris Schembra invites us into an extraordinary conversation with Seth Dechtman, a man whose journey has been defined not by fame or fanfare, but by grit, love, listening, and legacy.

The story begins with a question Chris has asked to thousands of people: Who is one person you’ve never thought to thank? Seth doesn’t hesitate, he honors his mother, Lenore, a woman who raised four children alone after the sudden passing of her husband. In Seth’s words, her life was a masterclass in grace, humility, and strength. Her resilience wasn’t loud, it was deliberate. Her courage wasn’t showy, it was sacred. That tribute sets the tone for everything that follows.

From there, we follow Seth’s winding journey from a paperboy in New Jersey to an international basketball coach in Venezuela, from assisting coaching legends to curating keynotes for some of the biggest brands in the world. Along the way, we hear about the founding of Planet Basketball, how it was never meant to be a business, but rather an invitation to create joy, connection, and opportunity through sport.

But this episode isn’t about basketball. It’s about what it takes to create something from nothing. It’s about choosing to see life as a blank canvas every single day, even when the world hands you a palette of pain. It’s about knowing that every person you meet, every speaker you book, every player you coach, every child you raise, is a chance to serve, elevate, and love.

Seth shares a refreshing vulnerability rarely heard from someone in the world of high-stakes events and corporate keynotes. He admits that wisdom doesn’t come from reading books or attending conferences. It comes from falling off the bike. From saying the wrong thing. From getting back up, and listening harder the next time.

Chris and Seth explore what it means to build a winning mindset, not the kind that craves podiums or applause, but the kind that recognizes victory in perseverance, curiosity, and meaningful connection. They dive into the power of words, how to unlearn ego, and the responsibility we all have to acknowledge those who have shaped us.

The stories are rich. The lessons are layered. And the message is clear: You didn’t get here alone. And there is a village, a legacy, and a lineage of love standing behind your every success.

Whether you're a parent, a coach, an entrepreneur, or someone simply trying to make sense of your next chapter. This episode is a reminder that life is an adventure, and every day is a new chance to choose love, gratitude, and growth.

10 Key Takeaways

1. Gratitude is Transformational: Seth’s tribute to his mother, Lenore, reminds us that gratitude isn’t just a mindset, it’s a guiding compass through life’s toughest moments.
2. Create from the Blank Canvas: Each day is a fresh opportunity to create something meaningful. You don’t need to be perfect, you just need to begin.
3. Adversity Builds Legacy: From losing his father as a teen to rebuilding life in Denver, Seth’s story exemplifies how adversity can become the soil where resilience grows.
4. Winning Is the Journey: It’s not about the podium, it’s about the process, the teammates, and the heart you put into every step of the climb.
5. Words Hold Power: The words we use can either uplift or damage. Seth urges us to speak with intention, because “if you're casual with your words, you cause casualties.”
6. Leadership Is Love in Action: Whether booking a speaker or raising a child, Seth’s ethos is simple: lead with love, and the results will follow.
7. Life Imitates Sport: Lessons from the basketball court—discipline, coaching, failure, teamwork—show up in business and life in powerful ways.
8. Legacy Is Found in Service: The most successful people Seth works with are those who serve others first. Greatness is built in the agency of others.
9. Wisdom Comes from Doing: You can’t read your way into experience. You must live it. Bite the apple. Fall off the bike. Get back up.
10. Give It All Away: In a world full of secrets and ego, Seth lives by the philosophy of radical generosity. “Give everything. That’s where the magic lives.”

10 Memorable Quotes  

“Life is a work of art, but you don’t have to be a Picasso.”  

“If you’re casual with your words, you cause casualties.”  

“Her inner strength was grace, humility, and the ability to show weakness.”  

“Sales doesn’t solve everything. Wisdom does.”  

“You wake up every day with a blank canvas, what you paint is up to you.”  

“Love is the only virtue that has no extreme.” - Felipe Gomez  

“The greatness in your life is in the agency of others.”  

“There’s no losing, only learning. There’s no failing, only growth.”  

“Bite the apple and fall off your bike. That’s how you know you’re alive.”  

“The world gives you data. Wisdom is choosing what to do with it.” 

Guest Bio: Seth Dechtman  

Seth Dechtman is the founder of The Keynote Curators, a keynote speaker agency dedicated  to matching world-class speakers with world-class events. With over 17 years of experience in  the speaking industry, Seth has worked with iconic brands like Apple, Microsoft, Ford,  Coca-Cola, and more.  

Seth’s approach isn’t just about finding speakers, it’s about curating transformational experiences. Whether rescuing a last-minute event or crafting VIP magic, his work is grounded in trust, wisdom, and results.  

Contact: [email protected]

Call to Action  

If this episode moved you, take a moment to thank someone who’s helped shape your journey.  Reflect on the people behind your success and let them know their impact matters.  

Share this episode with a friend, mentor, coach, or parent.  

Subscribe to Gratitude Through Hard Times for more raw, real, and remarkable stories.

In this powerful, emotionally resonant episode of Gratitude Through Hard Times, host Chris Schembra sits down with one of the world’s most respected thought leaders on human-centered performance: Ryan Estis.

Ryan isn't just a keynote speaker or former Fortune 500 Chief Revenue Officer. He’s a guide for leaders navigating complexity, a man who’s lived the tension between growth and burnout, performance and peace, ambition and alignment. Through stories both deeply personal and professionally profound, Ryan takes us behind the curtain of a life built on momentum through harmony—and how choosing wellness, wisdom, and worth have shaped his impact. 

From founding ImpactEleven (which achieved a 500% growth rate, 1300% increase in shareholder value, and 90% client retention in just two years), to standing ovations across global stages, Ryan’s track record is undeniable. But what makes this episode different is what’s unsaid—the inner work of reclaiming health, reconnecting to truth, and redefining success not by how far we go, but by how deeply we live. 

Together, Chris and Ryan explore: 

• the meaning of legacy and how wisdom passed down from a father becomes a compass,
• the role of weak ties and long-held partnerships like Lynn in a world obsessed with speed,
• the power of surrender and how BDSM culture taught Chris to drop into presence and care,and the hard-earned truth that we must unlearn external validation to live our truth.

This episode is part mentorship session, part love letter to resilience, and part rallying cry for those who feel like they’re achieving outwardly, yet quietly burning out inside.

10 Memorable Quotes

1. “Success without fulfillment and feeling good is failure.” – Ryan Estis
2. “You have to borrow someone else’s belief in you until your own catches up.” –Ryan Estis
3. “Don’t wreck the product. You’re the product.” – Ryan Estis
4. “Risk more than others think is safe. Care more than others think is wise. Dream more than others think is practical.” – Words of Wisdom from Ryan’s father
5. “To connect in service, you must first live from your center.” – Ryan Estis
6. “Gratitude isn’t just for the good times. It’s best practiced through the hard times.”– Chris Schembra
7. “The world will define you—if you let it.” – Ryan Estis
8. “Every person has the wisdom they need. It was put there for them.” – Ryan Estis
9. “Live your truth. It’s the kindest thing you can do for yourself—and for others.” – Ryan Estis
10. “You’re not the first person with a message on their heart who’s blown the moment.” – Adam “Smiley” Poswolsky, as quoted by Chris

10 Key Takeaways

1. The Journey Isn’t Linear—But It’s Worth It.
Chris’s lowest speaking moment led him directly to Ryan, proof that our darkest hours often plant the seeds of the brightest chapters.

2. Don’t Just Grow Fast. Grow From Your Center.
Ryan’s success wasn’t a straight hustle; it required slowing down, getting healthy, and aligning with values like momentum through harmony.

3. Your Legacy May Live in a Wooden Box.
A literal box of quotes from Ryan’s dad revealed the timeless wisdom that now shapes how he leads, speaks, and lives. These quotes became mantras.

4. The Quiet People Beside You Are Often the Most Powerful.
Ryan’s long-standing partnership with Lynn, his business manager since his first job out of college, is a testament to loyalty, presence, and consistency.

5. Define Success On Your Terms—Then Redefine It Again.
Whether it’s writing a book with his brother or shifting his health trajectory, Ryan models how to evolve your definition of winning.

6. Unlearning Is Just As Important As Learning.
Ryan had to unlearn the compulsion to respond to every piece of feedback and external pressure. His current work is about choosing inner authority.

7. Your Best Work Comes From Alignment.
From Ryan’s gesture of heart → head → hands, we learn that when your beliefs, mindset, and actions align, magic happens.

8. Weak Ties Are Stronger Than You Think.
Inspired by Granovetter’s 1973 study, the episode celebrates the strength of those people we see occasionally but who shape us profoundly.

9. There’s Power in Personal Rituals.
Whether it’s opening the wisdom box or walking back through difficult memories, grounding rituals help us stay human in a fast-paced world.

10. Human Be-ing > Human Doing.
Ryan and Chris both remind us: Your presence is your power. Stop outsourcing your identity. Show up fully. Live from your center.

Links & Resources

• Prepare for Impact by Ryan Estis
• Learn More About ImpactEleven
• Barbara Fredrickson’s Broaden-and-Build Theory of Positive Emotion
• Mark Granovetter’s Study: The Strength of Weak Ties
• More on Functional Medicine

Episode Description

In this electrifying episode of Gratitude Through Hard Times, Chris Schembra sits down with transformational speaker, coach, and author Juan Bendana, whose new book Confident by Choice is poised to reshape how we think about courage, action, and self-belief.

This conversation dives deep into a liberating truth: confidence isn’t a fixed trait—it's a daily decision. Together, Chris and Juan unpack the Confidence Cycle, a four-part science-backed framework (Micro Energy → Micro Courage → Micro Action → Micro Proof) designed to help everyday people break through fear and build an inspired life—one step at a time.

But this episode is more than a framework. It’s a heart-to-heart about mentorship, identity, failure, and the beauty of baby steps. Juan opens up about battling binge eating, hitting rock bottom, and how a good friend’s invitation to California helped him reset his entire life. From the weight of imposter syndrome to the surprising science behind confidence and Olympic achievement, Juan reminds us that we are all capable of change—especially when we stop trying to get it perfect and start moving with purpose.

If you’ve ever felt stuck, scared, or unsure where to begin, this episode is your signal to start. Listen in, take a breath, borrow some belief, and get ready to build the life you know is waiting for you.

1. “Confidence is not the absence of self-doubt. It’s the willingness to act anyway.” – Juan Bendana
    
2. “The way out is through. And the way through is trust.” – Chris Schembra
    
3. “Confident people spend more time with self-doubt than less confident people. They just have a better relationship with it.” – Juan Bendana
    
4. “When something bad happens, most people ask, ‘What’s wrong with me?’ Confident people ask, ‘What do I do next?’” – Juan Bendana
    
5. “Energy is the spark. Courage is the ignition. Action is the engine. Proof is the fuel.” – Chris Schembra
    
6. “You can borrow someone else’s confidence. Just try on their life like it’s a fresh pair of Jordans.” – Juan Bendana
    
7. “You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.” – Eleanor Roosevelt (quoted by Juan)
    
8. “The people in your life need you more than you think. Build your confidence, then give it away.” – Juan Bendana
    
9. “Olympians aren’t born more confident. They just commit to small steps over time.” – Chris Schembra
    
10. “I’m not there… yet. That single word creates space for growth, grace, and transformation.” – Juan Bendana
     

1. Confidence is a process, not a personality trait. It’s something we build through micro decisions, not something we’re born with or without.
    
2. Micro Energy is the foundation. Whether it’s rest, excitement, curiosity, or joy—building momentum starts with finding even the smallest spark.
    
3. Micro Courage means choosing discomfort on purpose. Confidence grows when we lean into fear, not when we avoid it.
    
4. Micro Action is where transformation begins. Even walking to the gym without going inside can be a powerful first step.
    
5. Micro Proof is confidence in motion. Success and failure both offer evidence that we’re capable of growth.
    
6. You don’t have to do it alone. Mentorship, community, and borrowed belief are part of the journey.
    
7. Failure builds confidence when it’s reframed. Trying and failing proves you had the courage to show up, and that’s enough.
    
8. Imposter syndrome is a sign of growth. It shows you're operating at your edge, where confidence can be forged.
    
9. Language matters. Swapping “I can’t” for “I can’t… yet” changes fixed mindsets into growth mindsets.
    
10. Confidence creates identity shifts. When you accumulate enough proof, you don’t just act differently—you become someone new.
     

1. Pre-order Juan’s book Confident by Choice (link in show notes)—and send it to someone who needs a boost of belief.
    
2. Do one micro action today toward a goal you’ve been putting off—send the email, take the walk, make the ask.
    
3. Reflect and journal: Where in your life are you telling yourself "I'm not enough"? Rewrite that story with "...yet."
    
4. Send a voice note to a friend or team member with words of confidence. “You’re amazing. I’m glad you’re here.”
    
5. Reach out to Juan on LinkedIn and say “You’re welcome”—as a callback to the moment he thanked all the strivers listening.
    

• 📚 Pre-Order Confident by Choice by Juan Bendana
• 🌐 Follow Juan on LinkedIn
• 📨 Contact Juan directly via email in the show notes
  
   

🎧 Subscribe to 

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In this riveting and deeply personal conversation, Chris Schembra sits down with Grace Smith — one of the world’s most respected hypnotherapists and the founder of the #1 hypnotherapy brand in the world — to explore how hypnosis can unlock peak performance, emotional clarity, and authentic leadership in the modern workplace.

Chris opens the episode by recounting how Grace helped him through a dark moment in 2021, using hypnotherapy to reconnect him to purpose, possibility, and a record-breaking year in business. From there, the conversation expands to cover Grace’s origin story, her groundbreaking work with high-achieving CEOs, and why hypnosis is less about “fixing” and more about revealing the strength already inside us.

Grace shares stunning stories from her early career — including how she helped a paralyzed man regain movement in a single session, a man who would later become her father-in-law. Together, they explore how the subconscious governs behavior, how leaders can reprogram outdated belief systems, and why gratitude often lives just beneath stress, waiting to be uncovered.

This episode is a masterclass in neuroscience, personal growth, and emotional intelligence for anyone looking to lead with clarity and courage in a world of chaos.

• Subconscious blocks and business growth
• The science of theta brainwave states and peak performance
• How trauma and stress quietly shape executive decision-making
• Why hypnosis helps leaders find clarity, confidence, and intuition
• The power of gratitude as a renewable energy source
• How to lead with presence in a world of distraction

• “When the subconscious is working against you, you’ll never reach your true potential.” – Grace Smith
• “Gratitude is there—it’s just buried beneath stress. Hypnosis helps you feel what’s already been inside you.” – Grace Smith
• “You’re not fixing broken people—you’re polishing the gem that was always there.” – Chris Schembra
• “Hypnosis gave me the pause I needed to take action toward healing. One week later, I bought a ticket to Italy.” – Chris Schembra
• “The brain doesn’t just change overnight because your circumstances improve. You have to rewire it—consciously.” – Grace Smith
• “I work with people whose decisions shift tectonic plates. When their subconscious is clear, the world moves with more grace.” – Grace Smith
• “Every subconscious breakthrough is followed by what I call a bonus miracle—change you didn’t even expect.” – Grace Smith
• “When you’re in theta, you bypass the ego. That’s where the intuition lives. That’s where the clarity begins.” – Grace Smith
• “We’re not adding anything. We’re removing what’s in the way of who you already are.” – Grace Smith
• “Hypnosis isn’t mind control. It’s mindset liberation.” – Grace Smith
• “Grace didn’t just help me recover—she helped me remember who I was before the noise.” – Chris Schembra
• “You can read every business book in the world. But if your subconscious is working against you, you’re building on sand.” – Chris Schembra
• “She’s not giving you a new mind—she’s handing you the keys to the one you forgot you had.” – Chris Schembra
  “Sometimes the only way forward is to pause long enough to hear the voice underneath the fear.” – Chris Schembra

• Grace’s first hypnotherapy session helped her quit smoking — and changed the course of her life
• How a United Nations peacekeeper paralyzed from a stroke moved his hand again in a single session
• Chris’s vulnerable account of his 2021 mental health crisis and the role Grace played in his recovery
• Why CEOs with billion-dollar companies are turning to hypnotherapy for their next breakthrough
• The neuroscience of flow, intuition, and decision-making under pressure

• Grace App: Hypnotherapy on-demand for stress, sleep, success, and more
• Learn more about 1:1 executive coaching with Grace

In this deeply moving and insight-rich episode of Gratitude Through Hard Times, host Chris Schembra welcomes Sara Hardwick, the Community Relationship Strategist at the Gift•ology Group and steward of the late John Ruhlin’s enduring legacy. What begins as a conversation about gifting quickly unfolds into a masterclass in human connection, spiritual resilience, and the transformative power of long-game generosity.

Sara shares her unexpected journey into this world of relational marketing—how a nudge from her college roommate and a single Google search led her to John’s work, and how her bold outreach blossomed into a mentorship, a career, and a calling. Chris and Sara reflect on how the principles of Beyond Gift•ology are not just business strategies—they’re spiritual frameworks for living well, loving deeply, and leading with purpose.

The episode pays tribute to John Ruhlin, a father, husband, and business visionary who turned gifting into an art form and relationship-building into an enterprise. John passed away in 2024, but his wisdom—"Relationships can take you places marketing can’t"—lives on in the systems, stories, and spirit that Sara now helps shepherd to the world.

Together, Chris and Sara unpack practical strategies from Beyond Gift•ology: how to build a business based on Return on Relationship (ROR), how to gift without branding or ego, and how to become what Adam Grant calls a “strategic giver”—someone who gives generously and wisely without burning out.

They explore the nuances between swag and soul, between a gift that gathers dust and a gift that transforms a relationship, and between a one-off act of kindness and a lifestyle of sustained generosity. Sara also speaks vulnerably about her faith journey, how her relationship with God guides her every decision, and how grief, gratitude, and giving are all connected.

Chris draws parallels between his own work at the dinner table and John’s commitment to elevating relationships through thoughtful gestures. They explore how tiny, consistent acts—handwritten notes, engraved knives, warm introductions—create ripple effects that build not just revenue, but legacy.

Whether you're a founder, a sales leader, a service-based professional, or simply someone who wants to live more intentionally in your relationships, this episode offers a generous mix of soul and strategy. It’s a reminder that business doesn’t have to be cold, marketing doesn’t have to be manipulative, and giving—when done well—can be your greatest competitive edge.

➤ A Powerful Opening Tribute
Chris opens with a personal story of how a 20-minute call with John Ruhlin in 2017 changed his life. That call turned into a two-and-a-half-hour conversation, a lasting mentorship, and the permission to go “all-in” on human connection.

➤ Sara’s Origin Story: From College Gifting Club to Gift•ology Leader
You’ll hear how Sara’s best friend Chloe encouraged her to Google “gift giving company”—a search that led to John Ruhlin’s work and, eventually, to Sara founding the internet’s largest gifting community while still in college.

➤ The Long Game of Generosity: ROR > ROI
Sara and Chris dive deep into the difference between Return on Investment (ROI) and Return on Relationships (ROR). Sara explains why short-term thinking in business keeps us stuck—and how giving first, without expecting anything in return, can actually become your greatest long-term growth engine.

➤ Gifting as Strategy, Not Swag
Sara outlines the key rules of strategic gifting:

• It’s not about you—it’s about the recipient.
   
• No logos, ever. Personalize for their life, not your brand.
   
• Love on the inner circle—spouses, kids, even the family dog.
   
• Focus on “practical luxuries” that create 5,475+ moments of thoughtfulness over time.

➤ The Rise of the Rich Relationship Society
Sara introduces the R.I.C.H. framework:

• Reciprocal
   
• Influential
   
• Connected
   
• Humble

She shares how this system is designed to help entrepreneurs and service-based professionals build referral-based businesses rooted in trust, warmth, and mutual growth.

➤ Jesus, Dinner Parties, and the Divine Power of a Knife
In one of the most personal moments, Sara credits her faith—and specifically, her renewed relationship with Jesus—as the compass guiding her work. They connect the dots between Jesus’ Last Supper, dinner tables as sacred community spaces, and how something as simple as a personalized kitchen knife can become a legacy of love.

➤ Beyond the Business Tactic: Legacy as the Ultimate ROI
The episode closes with a powerful reminder: while gifting is a strategy, true generosity is a posture of the heart. Sara shares that she’s not just playing for business success—she’s playing for eternity.

• Generosity isn’t a transaction—it’s a transformation. Strategic gifting isn’t about getting something back immediately. It’s about creating meaningful moments that compound over time.
• Your swag isn’t a gift—it’s a billboard. The most powerful gifts are useful, personal, and logo-free.
• Business is human-to-human. In a world overrun with AI, algorithms, and advertising, it’s the relationships built at your dinner table—not your Instagram grid—that truly move the needle.
• Legacy is built in the little things. A handwritten note. A kitchen knife. A prayer. A hug. These are the moments people remember.
   

Beyond Gift•ology by John Ruhlin – Buy the book
Learn more about the Rich Relationship Society – giftologygroup.com
Contact Sara Hardwick – [email protected]
Connect with Sara on LinkedIn – linkedin.com/in/sarahardwick
Giftology (Original Book) – Buy here

What if your inner critic isn’t the enemy—but a misdirected inner coach waiting for the right conversation?

On today’s soul-shifting episode, Chris Schembra sits down with licensed clinician and Wall Street Journal bestselling author Britt Frank to explore the untapped potential of your internal world. Britt’s new book, Align Your Mind, blends Internal Family Systems (IFS), neuroscience, trauma therapy, and radical compassion into a user manual for becoming a better leader—by leading yourself first.

In this raw, riveting, and often funny dialogue, Britt shares the ALIGN framework: a five-step method to transform the swirl of internal chaos into clarity, confidence, and calm leadership. You’ll walk away with tools to stop spinning, drop shame, and start collaborating—with all the voices in your head.

Chris and Britt explore:

• How circus training helped Britt tame her mind and discover flow
   
• Why shadow parts aren’t saboteurs—they’re secret allies
   
• The real difference between solitude and loneliness
   
• How to negotiate with your inner critic like it’s your toughest client
   
• Why authentic leadership doesn’t mean “bring all your parts to work”
   
• A powerful reframe: Your brain isn’t broken—it’s brilliant
  
   

Whether you’re a CEO, a team leader, or just trying to keep your head above water, this episode offers both practical tools and deep encouragement for navigating inner and outer leadership challenges.

• [00:08] Chris’ poetic New York City intro + welcoming new and loyal listeners
   
• [02:27] Britt’s dynamic background: therapist, speaker, author… and circus performer
   
• [05:47] The Gratitude Question: Britt thanks her first circus coach for raising her standards
   
• [07:36] Defining flow as alignment—not perfection
   
• [10:38] Intro to Parts Work and why leaders must embrace their inner multiplicity
   
• [12:38] What “shadow work” really means: turning inner tension into innovation
   
• [15:15] The ALIGN Framework:
  
  
  • Acknowledge
     
  • Listen
     
  • Investigate
     
  • Give Gratitude (to your brain!)
     
  • Negotiate
     
• [22:42] From loneliness to solitude: why inner gratitude is the first step to connection
   
• [25:32] Why some stress is good stress: shifting mental gears instead of stalling
   
• [28:57] Britt’s take on DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) and how it saved her life
   
• [31:35] Busting three myths of the workplace:
  
  
  • Don’t bring every part of yourself to work
     
  • Workplaces aren’t families—they’re teams
     
  • Positivity isn’t the same as leadership
     
• [36:53] Britt’s backstory: addiction, cults, hiding IFS books inside cult literature, and the breakthrough that changed her life
   
• [39:28] Final takeaway: your inner critic isn’t a bully—it’s your most loyal bodyguard
   
• [40:16] Chris’ signoff + why Align Your Mind is essential reading for anyone leading a team in 2025
  
   

“Flow is not the absence of thought. It’s movement in the presence of noise.” – Britt Frank

“Every part of you has value. You don’t need to silence them—you need to negotiate.” – Britt Frank

“The solution to loneliness is solitude—but only if your inner world isn’t at war with itself.” – Chris Schembra

“Your brain isn’t wired for success. It’s wired for survival. Say thanks, and lead anyway.” – Britt Frank

“Leadership is not about being positive all the time. It’s about being real—with curiosity and compassion.” – Britt Frank

Align Your Mind is Britt Frank’s empowering new guide to taming anxiety, healing trauma, and overcoming self-doubt using Parts Work. Combining practical exercises, storytelling, and cutting-edge neuroscience, Britt introduces readers to their internal cast of characters—from the anxious controller to the tired inner child—and shows how to bring them into harmony.

With Britt’s warm and witty voice, readers learn how to:

• Reframe the inner critic as a coach
   
• Move from chaos to clarity with the ALIGN method
   
• Use curiosity as an antidote to burnout and self-sabotage
   
• Stop waiting to feel motivated and start getting things done
   

Whether you’re a leader or simply a human navigating complexity, this book gives you the tools to realign and rise.

Order now: Penguin Random House

 

Britt Frank, LSCSW, is a licensed clinician, author, and speaker specializing in trauma, Parts Work, and mental health. Her work has been featured in The New York Times, NPR, Forbes, Esquire, and New York Magazine. She is the author of The Science of Stuck, The Getting Unstuck Workbook, and now Align Your Mind.

Based in Kansas City
brittfrank.com
Instagram: @BrittFrank

Chris Schembra is the Wall Street Journal bestselling author of 

Gratitude Through Hard Times

 and founder of the 7:47 Gratitude Experience™, which has impacted hundreds of thousands through the power of meaningful connection. He’s been featured in Rolling Stone, USA Today, Forbes, and beyond—and hosts this podcast as a space for leaders to explore the intersection of hardship, hope, and human potential.

Welcome back to another episode of Gratitude Through Hard Times! Today, your host Chris Schembra is joined by the insightful and inspiring Dr. Steve Elias, Dean of the Katz School of Business at Fort Lewis College in Durango, Colorado. Amidst the polar vortex sweeping through New York City, we dive into a heartwarming discussion about mentorship, leadership, and the power of gratitude in shaping our personal and professional journeys. Tune in as we explore how small acts of kindness, mutual respect, and a commitment to connection can create a lasting impact in our lives and communities.

In This Episode, You’ll Learn:

• How a simple shoulder tap can change the course of a career
• The importance of mentorship and building reciprocal relationships
• Lessons from Governor Gary Carruthers on leadership and respect across differences
• Why celebrating the success of others (Mudita) is key to fulfillment
• The Platinum Rule: Treating others the way they want to be treated
• How small, cumulative actions can create meaningful change
• Practical ways to express gratitude, even to those who are no longer with us

Guest Bio: Dr. Steve Elias is an experienced and approachable leader who knows how to bring people together and create positive change. As the Dean of the Katz School of Business at Fort Lewis College, he has worked hard to improve teamwork, build partnerships, and develop strategies that make a real difference for students, staff, faculty members, and the community. Steve is known for being down-to-earth and easy to talk to, with a leadership style based on open communication, fairness, and collaboration. With a background in applied social psychology and years of experience at Minority Serving Institutions, he understands people’s needs and makes them feel included and supported. Steve has a gift for inspiring others, building strong relationships, and finding creative ways to help organizations grow and succeed.

Episode Highlights:

• [00:03:15] Chris introduces Dr. Steve Elias and the story of how they met in Durango, Colorado.
• [00:07:45] Steve shares his gratitude for Governor Gary Carruthers and the pivotal moment he was "tapped on the shoulder."
• [00:14:30] The Platinum Rule in leadership: why treating people how they want to be treated matters.
• [00:21:10] Finding joy in the success of others - the power of Mudita.
• [00:28:50] Overcoming the challenge of appreciating personal accomplishments without feeling egotistical.
• [00:35:20] Chris and Steve reflect on the impact of small, everyday acts of gratitude.
• [00:42:10] Exploring the legacy of Bob Graetz and his contributions to the civil rights movement.
• [00:49:00] Practical advice for leaders on building a culture of recognition and gratitude in the workplace.

Resources Mentioned:

• ResearchGate profile of Dr. Steve Elias
• Deviant and Criminal Behavior in the Workplace by Dr. Steve Elias
• Maria’s Bookshop in Durango, Colorado
• The Platinum Rule concept
• Harvard Study on Adult Development by Dr. Robert Waldinger
• A&E Biography of Bob Graetz

Key Takeaways:

• Celebrate the success of others and recognize the role you’ve played in their journey.
• Small gestures, like lighting a candle or sending a kind message, have a profound impact.
• Gratitude should be practiced daily and can help overcome regret and guilt.
• Leaders should focus on relationship-building and understanding their team’s unique needs.

Call to Action: If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe to Gratitude Through Hard Times and share it with someone who could use a little inspiration today. Have thoughts or questions about this episode? We'd love to hear from you! 

Welcome to a soul-stirring episode of Gratitude Through Hard Times with your host, Chris Schembra. Set against the festive backdrop of New York City during the holiday season, this conversation is an inspiring reminder of the power of gratitude, connection, and intentional living. Joining Chris is Felipe Gómez, a world-renowned thought leader, virtuoso pianist, and keynote speaker who has captivated audiences across 33 countries with his unique blend of music and leadership insights.

Felipe’s journey is nothing short of extraordinary. From his early days learning piano under a patient and dedicated teacher to delivering over 1,000 electrifying performances on global stages, Felipe’s life is a testament to the power of passion and purpose. As a speaker, he combines ancient philosophies, modern leadership principles, and his prodigious musical talent to create experiences that resonate deeply with audiences. In this episode, Felipe and Chris unpack timeless lessons on gratitude, love, learning, and leadership, offering listeners a playbook for transformational living.

Chris kicks off the episode with his signature warmth, reminding us all of the magic of small moments and the power of shared experiences. Felipe’s reflections on his first piano teacher, Clara Lucia Sanchez, lay the foundation for a conversation that seamlessly weaves personal stories with actionable insights. Together, Chris and Felipe explore themes like the tension and release of life, the science of gratitude, and the profound impact of small, intentional choices.

Felipe’s philosophy is rooted in Aristotle’s golden mean—the balance between excess and deficiency—and he brings this ancient wisdom to life with practical examples and heartfelt anecdotes. He also highlights the transformative power of listening, encouraging leaders to embrace questions like “Tell me more” and “How can I help?” to build trust, empathy, and connection. Throughout the episode, Felipe and Chris demonstrate how gratitude, music, and human connection can serve as antidotes to a world often consumed by division and distraction.

As they close out the conversation, Chris and Felipe share their vision for a live event series that combines their passions—food, music, and leadership—to inspire and unite communities. This episode is a masterclass in finding beauty in the everyday, cultivating resilience, and making the choice to live with gratitude and purpose.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Felipe reflects on the life-changing impact of his first piano teacher and how her dedication inspired his lifelong love of music.
• Chris and Felipe explore the golden mean, Aristotle’s philosophy of balance, and how it applies to modern leadership and life.
• The importance of listening as a leadership skill is unpacked, with Felipe urging listeners to ask powerful questions like “Tell me more.”
• Chris shares the science of gratitude, detailing how it improves physical health, mental resilience, and overall happiness.
• Felipe draws a parallel between life and music, emphasizing the rhythm of tension and release as essential for growth and harmony.
• Together, they discuss how small, daily choices to learn, love, and explore can lead to a more meaningful and joyful life.

Notable Quotes:

• "Gratitude is the bridge between where we are and where we want to be." – Chris Schembra
• "We are designed to learn, to explore, and to love—every day is a chance to do all three." – Felipe Gómez
• "The most profound moments of joy come when we serve others, not ourselves." – Felipe Gómez
• "Ingratitude is the seed of all wickedness—it’s time we turn it into gratitude and growth." – Chris Schembra
• "Listening is an act of love, and it opens the door to empathy, understanding, and trust." – Felipe Gómez
• "Tension is part of life, but release is where growth happens. Don’t dwell in the tension." – Chris Schembra
• "Love, in its truest form, is the ultimate virtue—it has no limits, only power to transform." – Felipe Gómez
• "If you want to live a life of gratitude, don’t wait for the big moments. Start with the small ones." – Chris Schembra
• "In every conversation, the most important thing isn’t what’s said—it’s what remains unsaid." – Felipe Gómez
• "Virtue is found in the balance—between excess and deficiency lies the path to greatness." – Felipe Gómez
• "The greatest civilizations crumbled when gratitude disappeared. Let’s not repeat history." – Chris Schembra
• "To become virtuous, you have to act virtuously. Justice requires acts of justice, love requires acts of love." – Felipe Gómez
• "Gratitude is more than a feeling—it’s a tool for healing, hope, and humanity." – Chris Schembra
• "Ask two questions every day: 'Tell me more' and 'How can I help?' These will change your life." – Felipe Gómez
• "You don’t need permission or privilege to make the choice to learn, explore, and love. It’s yours to claim every day." – Chris Schembra

Actionable Takeaways:

1. Gratitude fuels growth: It fosters healing, connection, and personal transformation.
2. The power of small choices: Everyday acts of learning, exploring, and loving lead to a meaningful life.
3. Listen to lead: Effective listening builds trust, empathy, and innovation in leadership and life.
4. Tension and release: Life’s challenges are part of a rhythm—embrace the tension and find moments of release to thrive.

ABOUT OUR GUEST:

Felipe Gómez is a globally renowned speaker, virtuoso pianist, and thought leader whose work bridges the worlds of music, leadership, and personal transformation. With over 1,000 captivating performances delivered in 33 countries and 111 cities, Felipe has earned standing ovations from audiences around the world. His unique ability to blend classical music with practical leadership insights makes him one of the most sought-after keynote speakers today.

Felipe’s success is built on his extensive experience as an entrepreneur, business leader, and artist. He has delivered his message at some of the world’s most prestigious management and leadership forums, including the Global Peter Drucker Forum, the Oslo Business Forum, and the World Business Forum in New York, Madrid, Milan, and Sydney.

In his keynote presentations, Felipe uses a grand piano on stage to create a deeply interactive and transformative experience. Through music, he teaches profound lessons on leadership, trust, innovation, and teamwork, inspiring individuals and organizations to achieve greatness. His philosophy is rooted in the teachings of Aristotle and the concept of the “golden mean,” which he applies to modern challenges in life and business.

Felipe is also a celebrated author. His best-selling book, Attitude-E, offers practical frameworks for living with an entrepreneurial mindset, while his upcoming release, Virtuoso, explores the art of living and leading with excellence. Felipe hosts Pensando en Voz Alta, a weekly interview program where he engages with global leaders on topics of creativity, resilience, and transformation.

Born in Colombia, Felipe holds an MBA from the International Institute for Management Development (IMD) in Switzerland, where he also completed a program on Leading Digital Business Transformation. He combines his global perspective with the sensibility of an artist, delivering a message that resonates across cultures and industries.

Whether he’s inspiring corporate executives, performing on stage, or engaging with audiences through his 42-Day Listening Challenge, Felipe’s mission is clear: to help people orchestrate transformational change in their personal and professional lives.

Connect with Felipe Gómez:

• Website: Learn more about Felipe's work and upcoming events.
  Felipe Gomez
• LinkedIn: Connect with Felipe on LinkedIn.

ABOUT OUR HOST:

Chris Schembra is the Wall Street Journal bestselling author of Gratitude Through Hard Times and Gratitude and Pasta. USA Today calls him their "Gratitude Guru", he's a Founding Member of Rolling Stone Magazine's Culture Council, and he sits on the Executive Board at Fast Company Magazine.

He is the Founder and Chief Question Asker of the 7:47 Gratitude Experience™ — an evidence-based framework used to strengthen client and team relationships in profound ways. He's used the principles of gratitude to spark thousands of relationships within the workplace.

FOLLOW CHRIS:

**WEBSITE |INSTAGRAM |LINKEDIN |BOOKS**

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

• Felipe’s 42-Day Listening Program: Subscribe for a daily dose of classical music and reflection.
• Chris Schembra’s Book: Gratitude Through Hard Times: Finding Positive Benefits Through Our Darkest Hour.
• Adam Grant’s Book: Give and Take: Why Helping Others Drives Our Success.
• Barbara Fredrickson’s Research: Learn about the broaden-and-build theory of positive emotions.