Grief Circle with Sammy

This episode I had the honor of meeting with Jill Cohen, a grief counselor based in NYC. Jill told me about her opinions on how grief is different in kids than in adults and also how not all kids express grief in the same manner. We shared our analogies of how grief is in kids, mine being a cell, hers an ice cream sundae. Jill also shared how her experience as a train thanatologist has helped her be the best grief counselor she can be. Listen to hear some great advice on how grief manifests in kids.

Welcome back to Grief Circle! On this episode, I update you all with the current state of my life: college application season. College essays often have us dig back into our lives and think to ourselves, how have we gotten to where we are? This reflection can be nerve-racking for anyone, however, for children who have lost a loved one, this reflection can be very tough. I talk about how I have dealt with sorting through my memories while crafting my college essays.

Enjoy this brief update of me giving some quick updates about how I have been handling grief in my life. I talk about how I have been dealing with grief, especially during a day such as Fathers Day. I also talk about how I have handled grief as I have just started my position in a cancer research lab.

On this episode of Grief Circle with Sammy I spoke with my sister Isabel who was only 8 years old when our dad passed away. She talks about her recent experiences with what it was like not having her dad at her bat mitzvah, which is a pretty big experience for young Jewish girls, and an event which her father couldn't be at. Listen along to hear her story!

Just me in this short episode, however, I talk about something very important. Letting your single or widowed parent date someone else. As grieving children we often get caught in the idea that our parents dating means that they are replacing our other parent, however, this is anything but the truth. Our widowed parent is just trying to find happiness in the world, just as any other person deserves. Listen to hear my perspective as a kid who had to learn to feel comfortable with his widowed mother dating someone.

On this episode, I got to speak with Emma, a junior at Pace University. Emma was only 10 years old when her dad died of sever coronary artery disease. She had no time to say goodbye to him as her family had no clue he even had the disease. One day her brother walked into a bedroom and saw her dad lying on the floor, he tried to wake him up, but he wasn't able to. Listen to hear her story on what it was like dealing with such an immediate death in only the 5th grade.

In this episode, I had the pleasure of speaking with Tory who is a 24-year-old English teacher in Japan. Tory's dad died when she was 18 years old after a 10-month fight with lung cancer. The age of 18 is a very formative age for most people as they are heading off to college and figuring out what they want to do with their lives, now image what this pressure is like after you just lost a parent. Tory talks to me about how she has navigated grief through her time all around the world in Kansas, Canada, and Japan. Listen to hear more about her story.

I wanted to keep this episode brief since I have no guest, however, this episode is about how we shouldn't compartmentalize death. Death and grief are not something that should be left behind or left in 1 "bucket" of your life. It's okay to incorporate death into your work at school, into your conversations with friends, and your daily thoughts. At the end of the day, it's all in honor of your loved one.

While I have no guest this episode, I do sharing some interesting stories and tips about how we need to make death less about us. Often times we feel the need to make our loved ones death about us, but the real story we should be sharing is about our parent, sibling, or friend who is now dead. It can be tough as a kid to put your self in the rearview mirror and change your actions to be about someone else, however, doing this will make you feel better in the long run when you are thinking about how you have honored your loved ones memory.

This episode is a MUST LISTEN! I got to speak with Dr. Lucy Kalanithi, the widow of Dr. Paul Kalanithi, author of When Breath Becomes Air. Some background on Paul, "Paul Sudhir Arul Kalanithi was an American neurosurgeon and writer. His book When Breath Becomes Air is a memoir about his life and illness with stage IV metastatic lung cancer. It was posthumously published." Paul and Lucy decided to have their daughter Cady when he was sick, Cady is now 9. Lucy gave some great stories, tips, and advice on what it has been like raising a daughter who has virtually no memory of her father, only the photos and stories of him. I highly recommend you read the book and hear more about this amazing families story.