Grief Reset

Today's guest is Christi Wiltenburg!

I'm so glad you have this opportunity to meet Christi. She is such a bright light in this world. We talk in this episode about parenting yourself after losing a parent, and how we can sometimes look for validation outside of ourselves. I hadn't thought at length about this "parenting yourself" concept until our talk. I of course thought about losing my dad in various ways, but this is a new way to turn something difficult around for good.

You can connect with Christi on Instagram:

Her photo project that we discuss in the episode: @ayearinlifewithoutyou (So profound, I scrolled back through as I was preparing this episode. Every image is reflective of her inner world. I hope to see this as a show or book one day.)

And her new pottery and macrame venture: @theknottypot (This new project is what inspired me to reach out to Christi. She has such a fascinating way of working creatively, a hands-on artist in so many mediums. It's inspiring!)

She also recommends:

"I really loved Carnelian for me personally as a stone and the Instagram account @risingwoman had a lot of helpful (information) on relationship attachment styles and cycle breaking that helped me." I looked up the meaning of Carnelian and it is "known for being a stone of courage, endurance, energy, leadership, and motivation" (taken from trulyexperiences.com).

Enjoy!

Today's episode is part Monthly Check-In, part book recommendation. Having a daily or monthly way to check-in with ourselves can be so beneficial anytime in our lives, and especially when experiencing grief. Guided journals are a wonderful way to explore our innermost thoughts and feelings. You'll find a few recommendations of resources below. I hope you enjoy.

Emily Silva Hockstra, what a kind, light-filled person. She is the author of multiple books, her Instagram inspires daily @soulsadventures, and on a personal note, her work has changed my life way down deep.

I highly recommend her books:

Moonlight Gratitude: A Journal, Nighttime Meditations And Reflections For Better Sleep

Moonlight Gratitude: 365 Nighttime Meditations For Deep, Tranquil Sleep All Year Long

Explore more of her work on her website: soulsadventures.com

You can also watch/listen to a conversation we had on her Journey Through Grief series about Cracking Open

Other guided journals I've loved working through:

Get Untamed: The Journal (How to Quit Pleasing and Start Living) by Glennon Doyle

The Inner Me: A Journal to Connect with Yourself and Discover What Brings you True Happiness by Editors of Chartwell Books

Your Brightest Life Journal: A Creative Guide to Becoming Your Best Self by Caroline Kelso Zook

Thank you for being a friend!

Supportive Links:

What Makes A Good Friend? by Reach Out

Ways To Support Someone Who Is Grieving by Harvard Health Publishing

How To Help A Grieving Friend by The Recovery Village

Today's guest is Colleen Kavanaugh!

Colleen is such a vibrant, cheerful, and colorful human being despite having gone through many difficult chapters in her life. It feels as though half of what I've learned about grief and grieving well have come from her work. She has a wealth of information to share, and decided for this conversation she would give us a grief primer--essentially the basics of self care while going through grief. These concepts are so vital to anyone going through it. Whether your grief has been around for years, is brand new, or you're looking to support a friend... we can all learn something new from her.

Ways to connect with Colleen:

Website: ⁠colleenkavanaugh.com⁠

Instagram: ⁠@colleenkavanaugh_⁠

Book Recommendations from Colleen:

⁠Can't We Talk About Something More Pleasant? A Memoir⁠ by Roz Chast⁠There Is No Good Card for This: What To Say and Do When Life Is Scary, Awful, and Unfair to People You Love⁠ by Dr. Kelsey Crowe, Emily McDowell

*The photo for this episode is by Madison Luikens. I just love this selection Colleen chose. It shows her love of music, (e)motion, and her inner joy!

Supportive links to things from our discussion:

⁠The After Life Podcast by Colleen Kavanaugh with guest, Rachel Marie (Helden)⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - Our interview from five years ago!

⁠A playlist to get you dancing: ⁠Dance the days longer: winter 2021⁠⁠ by Colleen

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Free Way: A Road Trip Playlist⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ by Rachel

And here’s a quote Colleen thought of when I spoke of doing the dishes etc: 

“I learned to find equal meaning in the repeated rituals of domestic life. Setting the table. Lighting the candles. Building the fire. Cooking. All those soufflés, all that crème caramel, all those daubes and albóndigas and gumbos. Clean sheets, stacks of clean towels, hurricane lamps for storms, enough water and food to see us through whatever geological event came our way. These fragments I have shored against my ruins, were the words that came to mind then. These fragments mattered to me. I believed in them. That I could find meaning in the intensely personal nature of life as a wife and mother did not seem inconsistent with finding meaning in the vast indifference of geology and the test shots.”― Joan Didion, ⁠The Year of Magical Thinking⁠

Some of Colleen's projects, past and present:

⁠⁠Love Letter: To You It May Concern⁠⁠⁠ Podcast - Excellent! Full of music, poetry, and creativity. Season 3 Coming Soon.

⁠⁠Your Life, Styled by Colleen Kavanaugh⁠⁠ - Where Colleen makes your home and business look and function as well as the life you live and the work you do.

⁠⁠⁠My Grit, Grace + Gratitude⁠⁠⁠ by Colleen and Deb - I enjoyed going through this workbook and course so much. I think you will too.

Here are a few supportive links to accompany this episode:

The Anniversary Effect on Psychology Today - I remember reading this article for the first time and it made so much sense! I sent it to my family immediately, hopefully you find some truth in it as well.

Becoming a Parent After the Death of a Parent by What's Your Grief? - This was a specific search I did while anticipating our daughter's arrival. It is searing and relatable on many levels. I've gone back to revisit and read it at least 10 times over the past year.

Unique Ways to Remember Your Loved One on Their Birthday from Farenga Funeral Home in Astoria, NY

50 Creative Ways to Honor a Deceased Loved One by Rachel Blado with On The Way to Where You're Going

Special note about the photo for this episode: I just love this picture of my Dad and I. There aren't many photos where we're holding hands or in an embrace, especially in our later years. Plus, we were all dressed up for a wedding we were enjoying, dancing together. Seeing the picture helps me to imagine touching him again, and helps me to remember he really was real.

Some thoughts on growth from host, Rachel Helden.

A few links to things mentioned in the episode:

The Artist’s Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity by Julia Cameron - An amazing book that teaches the idea of morning pages. Life changing!

Hidden Brain - A podcast that explores the unconscious patterns that drive human behavior and questions that lie at the heart of our complex and changing world.

This American Life - A weekly public radio program and podcast that chooses a theme and puts together different kinds of stories on that theme.

Today's guest is Ashley Brown!

Ashley has been a soul sister and grief companion of mine in many of life's highs and lows. Ashley discusses expectations she experienced in her moments of grief from herself, work, those close to her, and by society at large. She speaks candidly about a brain aneurysm and stroke she went through and has been changed forever by, a story that is not to be missed. She now finds purpose in working with organizations that support brain aneurysm survivors and families who have been affected by them. She is also an advocate for awareness and education.

It is a miracle that Ashley is here with us today and I'm so grateful to her for sharing her story with us. Find a quiet moment in your busy week and enjoy listening to the gifts she has to offer.

You can find out more about Ashley and the organizations she is a part of at:

Instagram: @ashdoneli

Her Blog: Color Outside the Lines

The Bee Foundation: www.thebeefoundation.org / @thebeefoundation

Brain Aneurysm Foundation: www.bafound.org / @bafound

Today's guest is Liz Shakti Wyld!

Liz is a brilliant soul, traveler, and yogi who has been a dear friend to me in some of my deepest grief moments. We share the loss of our dad's and also both went through a divorce, which knit our hearts together in a whole new way as friends. She imparts so much wisdom in this conversation, and despite the recording quality (it's my first episode forgive me!) I was so moved by our time together. Liz closes with a powerful meditation you can do wherever you are. Enjoy!

Ps, the photo she gave me for this episode speaks to her childlike wonder and the endless possibilities she makes a reality each day. Her inner child shines bright, and I just know yours will connect with it.

You can discover more about Liz and her work at:

www.shaktikidsyoga.com

www.lizshakti.com

Instagram: @liz_shakti

Ever felt the need for a shift of energy in your day to lift you from one place to another? This is the intention of Grief Reset. It will be a place for inspiration, creative ideas, and blessings from special guests who have gifts and talents to share. Thank you for joining us on this journey. I'm grateful you're here.