Grief with Rose and Holly

What is anticipatory grief, and why can it feel so lonely? Grief therapist Roselin Merifield talks with her niece, Holly Formosa, about grieving someone who is still alive, as Holly faces the death of her mum.

Rose explains what families go through while someone is dying, drawing on her years in palliative care. She covers why relief and guilt so often arrive together, why grief isn’t only about death, and how the people around someone can help without trying to fix anything.

In this episode

• What anticipatory grief is, and how it compares with grief after a death
• Grief beyond death: divorce, redundancy, and watching someone you love struggle
• Why our push to stay positive can leave no room for sadness
• What families go through in palliative care, and why “fighting” an illness can be exhausting
• Resentment, anger, exhaustion and guilt while you wait
• How people spend the time that’s left, from making plans to passing things on
• What can change after the death, from family rifts to working out who you are again
• How to support someone: stay connected, sit with them, and share a laugh when you can

Support and links

• Need support right now? Call Lifeline on 13 11 14, any time of the day or night, or visit lifeline.org.au. If life is in danger, call 000.
• Book a session with Rose, over the phone, online or in person in Point Cook, Victoria: roselin.com.au/contact
• Find out more about Rose's work: roselin.com.au
• Grief counselling, information and resources: Grief Australia

If this episode helped you, please follow the show and leave a rating or review. It's how other people who need it will find us.

Grief with Rose and Holly is a six-part series. This episode is general information, not a substitute for individual professional advice.

What really happens in the first week after a death? Grief therapist Roselin Merifield talks with her niece, Holly Formosa, about the practical steps, the shock, and why grief looks different for everyone.

Rose explains what to expect whether a death is expected or sudden, at home, in hospital or in hospice. She covers what has to happen that first week and what can wait, how grief shows up in the body, and why the most useful support is often practical, patient and ongoing.

In this episode

• Why relief, guilt, shock, numbness and disbelief can all be normal
• Anticipatory grief, and why preparing for a death doesn't remove the shock
• How attachment styles can shape the way we grieve
• The first-week to-do list: the funeral home, family, banks, death certificates, and when the coroner is involved
• Why the funeral doesn't have to happen straight away
• How friends and family can help: meals, childcare, housework, paperwork, and staying in touch after the first few weeks
• Grief in the body: sleep, appetite, exhaustion, anxiety, and the hidden strain on carers
• Professional support, from grief counsellors to EMDR, tapping, journaling and poetry

Support and links

• Need support right now? Call Lifeline on 13 11 14, any time of the day or night, or visit lifeline.org.au. If life is in danger, call 000.
• Book a session with Rose, over the phone, online or in person in Point Cook, Victoria: roselin.com.au/contact
• Find out more about Rose's work: roselin.com.au
• Grief counselling, information and resources: Grief Australia

If this episode helped you, please follow the show and leave a rating or review. It's how other people who need it will find us.

Grief with Rose and Holly is a six-part series. This episode is general information, not a substitute for individual professional advice.