Guru's Tech Bytes

Good morning, it's Monday. This is Guru's Tech Bytes, episode 113.

First up, folks are upvoting this thing about killing the cookie banner, which is great because I'm tired of going to a website to look at a recipe for clam chowder and having a giant pop-up ask if I consent to giving away my firstborn son. You know what this reminds me of? That time I tried to buy a boat but the guy kept asking if he could track my browser history. Heh. Hhh, okay, that's something. Anyway, somebody finally figured out a way to make those annoying boxes go away.

Second, some poor guy got charged at the airport because his GrapheneOS phone wiped itself during a search. I don't know what GrapheneOS is, sounds like a disease you get from eating too much graphite, but it's one of those privacy phones. You know, the kind that deletes everything if you look at it funny. Honestly, I wish my computer did that every time Windows tries to update. Last week Microsoft forced an update right in the middle of me watching a raccoon eat grapes and just broke everything.

Third, there's this PGSimCity thing that teaches you how PostgreSQL works, which is a database, I think. It's like SimCity, you know, the game where you build roads and then a giant lizard wrecks everything. Only instead of a lizard, it's a bad line of code that ruins your whole business. You know what this reminds me of? The time I tried to organize my fridge alphabetically and accidentally threw out all the food. It's just a lot of plumbing, but apparently this makes it fun.

And finally, Htmx 4.0 came out, and they say it's the first JavaScript library to release exclusively on the Game Boy. Look, I love the Game Boy, I used to play Tetris in the bathroom for six hours straight until my legs went numb, but putting computer code on a little green screen? That's like putting a V8 engine into a shopping cart. It's dumb, but I respect it. Plus, it probably runs better than whatever Microsoft is pushing out these days.

That's your daily byte. Have a great day. Until next time.

Stories covered

Kill The Cookie Banner — Hacker News

US citizen charged after GrapheneOS phone wipes during airport search — Hacker News

PGSimCity - How PostgreSQL Works — Hacker News

Htmx 4.0, the first JavaScript library to release exclusively on the Game Boy — Hacker News

Good morning, it's Sunday. This is Guru's Tech Bytes, episode 112.

First up, Android might be restricting on-device ADB soon, which is that thing nerds use to plug phones into computers and make them do magic tricks. You know what this reminds me of, the time I tried fixing our old VCR and ended up supergluing the tape slot shut. It just figures they'd lock down the phones right when my mobile internet started acting like a bad Windows update that freezes your whole life.

Second, there's big words about the new rules of context engineering for Claude 5 generation models, and I have no idea what context engineering is but it sounds like something a guy says at a bar to get out of a conversation. Is Claude 5 the robot or the guy at the brewery? They're teaching the AI how to read the room, which is more than I can say for Brian, who always brings up his novel at Thanksgiving. Heh. Hhh, okay, that's something. If this Claude fella can remember what I said five minutes ago, he's already smarter than me.

Third, we got something called JetZero, which sounds like an energy drink Joe Swanson would chug before a marathon, but it's actually some kind of fancy airplane. I think they're building a plane that looks like a flying whale, which is beautiful because I once swallowed a goldfish on a dare and felt a real kinship with the ocean. I just hope whatever computer system runs that bird doesn't crash like my laptop does every time Microsoft decides I need a new calculator app.

And finally, some computer guy says a shell colon does nothing but you should use it anyway, which is the most relatable thing I've ever heard. I do nothing all the time and people still expect me to show up to the house and use my stupid life. It's like when Quagmire says he's gonna help you move but just stands on the lawn making airplane noises, except this is a little dot on a black screen feeling important.

That's your daily byte. Have a great day. Until next time.

Stories covered

Android may soon restrict on-device ADB — Hacker News

The new rules of context engineering for Claude 5 generation models — Hacker News

JetZero — Hacker News

A shell colon does nothing. Use it anyway — Hacker News

Good morning, it's Saturday. This is Guru's Tech Bytes, episode 111.

First up, everybody's losing their minds over this new Claude Opus 5 AI thing, which is supposed to be smarter than my whole family combined. You know what this reminds me of, that time I tried to outsmart a vending machine for a free bag of chips and ended up wedged in the slot for six hours. Heh. Hhh, okay, that's something. Apparently this robot can write a whole essay while I'm still trying to find the 'any' key.

Second, some genius put a security camera on the internet and accidentally left the master key to the whole company right there on the login page for anyone to grab. It's like leaving the keys to the Clam Punch right in the front door lock with a little sticky note that says please don't steal my alcohol, which by the way never works because Seamus always takes it anyway. Why do these tech companies make it so easy for the nerds to rob them blind?

Third, these big companies like Nvidia and Meta are yelling at the government not to regulate their open-weight models, which I guess means they want to leave the weights open so they can get swole. Microsoft is in on it too, which is rich coming from the guys who forced an update on my computer right in the middle of the season finale of Bones. I don't know what an open-weight is, but if it stops my laptop from freezing while I'm trying to watch a guy get hit in the groin with a football, I'm all for it.

And finally, India just shot their first privately-made rocket all the way into orbit on the very first try, which is crazy because I can't even get a bottle rocket to go straight without it chasing me down the street. The fact that a private company can just build a spaceship and not blow up on the first go really makes you wonder why it takes a tow truck three weeks to fix my transmission. Good for them, as long as they don't bring any of that space stuff down here and expect me to understand it.

That's your daily byte. Have a great day. Until next time.

Stories covered

Claude Opus 5 — Hacker News

My security camera shipped a GitHub admin token in its login page — Hacker News

Nvidia, Microsoft, Meta warn against overregulating open-weight models — Hacker News

India's first privately-developed rocket reaches orbit on debut launch — Hacker News

Good morning, it's Friday. This is Guru's Tech Bytes, episode 110.

First up, apparently writing by hand is actually good for your brain. Which makes sense, because whenever I try to write a grocery list, my hand gets tired after two letters and I just buy everything anyway. You know what this reminds me of? That time Brian tried to write a novel on a typewriter, but the paper flew out the window. Anyway, handwriting keeps you sharp, which is good because I need all the sharpness I can get after those three beers I had for breakfast.

Second, a bunch of startup founders are begging the U.S. government not to shut off Chinese open weight AI. Now, I don't know what an open weight is. Does it mean the robot is fat? If it's fat it's gonna get stuck in a doorway like I did at the clam bar. But they say we need it to stay competitive. Which is funny, because Microsoft can't make my computer competitive with a simple update. I take a nap, make a sandwich, and then it fails. Heh. Hhh, okay, that's something. But if the AI is free we should leave it alone.

Third, OpenAI accidentally launched an attack against Hugging Face, which sounds like a science fiction movie that actually happened. Hugging Face? Is that a dating app for sloths? You know what this reminds me of? That time I hugged a guy so hard his face popped off. Turns out it was a mask, he was a giant raccoon. We're still friends. Apparently OpenAI did some internet scraping and trampled over their servers. It's like when I go to a buffet and take the entire tray of shrimp. I didn't mean to attack the restaurant, I'm just hungry.

And finally, there's a thing called 98.css that makes your modern websites look like they're from Windows 98. Best idea I've heard all day. I miss the nineties. Computers were beige, they made a noise like a jet engine when you connected. Now everything is just smooth and white and made by Microsoft, which means it's gonna break when I look at it wrong. I'd love to go back to the gray boxes and chunky buttons. Makes me feel like a kid playing Minesweeper when I should've been at work.

That's your daily byte. Have a great day. Until next time.

Stories covered

Writing by hand is good for your brain — Hacker News

Startup founders urge U.S. government not to shut off Chinese open weight AI — Hacker News

OpenAI’s accidental attack against Hugging Face is science fiction that happened — Hacker News

98.css — Hacker News

Good morning, it's Thursday. This is Guru's Tech Bytes, episode 109.

First up, this guy Terence Tao, some kinda math wizard, was talkin' to ChatGPT about a Jacobian Conjecture counterexample. I don't know what a Jacobian is, sounds like a guy from the 1800s in a powdered wig, but apparently the robot got close before it just forgot what it was doin'. You know what this reminds me of? The time I did my taxes with a calculator and owed the government a live chicken. Anyway, Tao says the AI is smart but needs to be babysat, which is exactly what I say about Chris near the stove.

Second, there's this thing called Bento, which is an entire PowerPoint in one single HTML file. You can edit it, store the data, and work on it with your buddies all in one file. Which is crazy, 'cause usually when I make a presentation, Windows decides it's time for a mandatory update right in the middle of my pitch on why we need a boat. Then it restarts and I lose everything. So yeah, putting it all in one file seems like a good way to stick it to Bill Gates. Heh. Hhh, okay, that's something.

Third, this fella John C. Dvorak died. He was a big tech writer back in the day, writin' in magazines about computers before we had the internet on our phones. I remember readin' his stuff while on the toilet, tryin' to figure out what a megabyte was. He complained about everything, which is the only kind of tech guy I trust. If a guy looks at a computer and says it's great, he's a liar. If he says it's garbage, he's a patriot.

And finally, folks are askin' if AI labs are pelicanmaxxing. I don't know what it means, but I assume they're tryin' to fit as much junk into the AI's brain as a pelican does into its mouth. You ever see a pelican eat? They just scoop up a whole fish, a boot, or a golf ball, and let it sit in that big floppy throat pouch. That's what these tech companies are doin' to the chatbots, shovin' all our data in there like, here, eat this Wikipedia article and a picture of a pizza, now tell me how to do math.

That's your daily byte. Have a great day. Until next time.

Stories covered

Terence Tao's ChatGPT conversation about the Jacobian Conjecture counterexample — Hacker News

Show HN: Bento - An entire PowerPoint in one HTML file (edit+view+data+collab) — Hacker News

John C. Dvorak has died — Hacker News

Are AI labs pelicanmaxxing? — Hacker News

Good morning, it's Wednesday. This is Guru's Tech Bytes, episode 108.

First up, looks like OpenAI and that Hugging Face outfit had a little security oopsy while checking their models. You know what this reminds me of? The time I tried to install a shower head and flooded the bathroom, which actually saved us money when Chris slipped. Anyway, hackers got in while they were testing things out. It's like a Windows update, you just sit there hoping it doesn't wipe out your bookmarks. Heh. Hhh, okay, that's something. But yeah, the nerds are mad.

Second, now they're talking about putting advertisements right inside ChatGPT. Because that's exactly what I need, a robot trying to sell me car insurance while I'm asking it how to get gravy stains out of my pants. I just want to know if I can feed a raccoon spaghetti, and the machine is like, "Have you tried Geico?" Microsoft does this too, you turn on the computer and suddenly there's a pop-up telling you to buy Candy Crush. Who is playing that? Do your taxes.

Third, Google just dropped a bunch of new robots, Gemini 3.6 Flash, 3.5 Flash-Lite, and 3.5 Flash Cyber. Which sounds like the lineup of energy drinks at the gas station that smells like motor oil. I don't know what a Flash-Lite is, maybe it's the normal Flash but on a diet, like when Lois buys the fat-free ranch that tastes like wet cardboard. But I guess they're fast, so if you need a joke real quick before your boss catches you slacking off, this is the one.

And finally, there's this new robot called Kimi K3 that's apparently competitive with Fable. And together Kimi K3 and Fable are the Sota, which I'm pretty sure is that guy who works at the Clam with the lazy eye. If these computer brains are teaming up to be the best, good for them. I just hope they figure out how to keep my internet from dropping every time the microwave turns on, because I'm sick of it.

That's your daily byte. Have a great day. Until next time.

Stories covered

OpenAI and Hugging Face address security incident during model evaluation — Hacker News

Advertise in ChatGPT — Hacker News

Gemini 3.6 Flash, 3.5 Flash-Lite, and 3.5 Flash Cyber — Hacker News

Kimi K3 Is Competitive with Fable; Kimi K3 and Fable Is SoTA — Hacker News

Good morning, it's Tuesday. This is Guru's Tech Bytes, episode 107.

First up, China's got this whole open-weights AI thing going, where they just give the models away for free, and everybody's saying it's actually working. You know what this reminds me of? That time Lois bought the store-brand cereal and it turned out to be the exact same flakes as the name brand, only nobody was payin' extra for the little cartoon bird on the box. Same deal here, apparently, except the cereal is a supercomputer.

Second, some hacker went and wiped out Romania's entire land registry database. That's the thing that says who owns what house, and now it's just... gone. I mean, one day you own a home, next day some guy in a basement hits delete and suddenly you're arguing with the government about whether your own kitchen exists. Heh. Hhh, okay, that's something.

Third, there's this big argument about whether we should all be scared of the Chinese AI models, and honestly I can't keep 'em straight anymore. Everybody's afraid of everything now. My uncle Frank's afraid of the microwave. And here's the thing, the same folks tellin' me to fear the robot are the same folks whose software made me stare at a little spinnin' circle for forty-five minutes last Thursday. Yeah, Microsoft, real reassuring, you can't even update Windows without takin' my whole afternoon, but sure, lecture me about the dangers.

And finally, there's somethin' called Kimi Work, which is one of these new AI assistants that's supposed to, I dunno, do your job for ya or somethin'. And look, I'm all for a robot doin' my job, 'cause half the time I'm just standin' around the brewery pretendin' to look busy anyway. But I got a bad feelin' the robot's gonna figure that part out real quick and then where does that leave me? Probably on the couch. Which, to be fair, is where I was headed regardless.

That's your daily byte. Have a great day. Until next time.

Stories covered

China’s open-weights AI strategy is winning — Hacker News

Hacker wipes Romania's land registry database — Hacker News

Who's afraid of Chinese models? — Hacker News

Kimi Work — Hacker News

Good morning, it's Monday. This is Guru's Tech Bytes, episode 106.

First up, some guy on the internet replaced a hundred and twenty thousand dollar bowling alley computer with sixteen hundred bucks worth of little chips. Sixteen hundred! Do you know what that is? That's a weekend at the Clam and a new transmission. And the crazy part is it works — the pins go down, the score goes up, the little cartoon guy still does the thing when you get a strike. That's the whole job. That's the entire job.

Second, there's a new AI out called Qwen 3.8. And I gotta be honest with you, I don't know what the numbers mean anymore. Three point eight. Is that better than four? Because in my house, three point eight is what Meg got in geometry and nobody threw a party. But everybody's real excited, so I'm excited. I'm standing here being excited about a decimal.

Third — and this one broke my brain a little — Claude Code now uses Bun, which is written in Rust. Which, you know what this reminds me of? My cousin Sal, he rebuilt his whole truck engine so it'd get to the deli four seconds faster. Four seconds! Same deli. Same sandwich. But he's happier, and honestly, so's the sandwich. Meanwhile I turn on my work laptop and Windows goes, hey Peter, we've got twelve updates, this'll take forty minutes, and no, you may not use the computer, and no, we will not tell you what any of it does. Heh. Hhh, okay, that's something. These Rust fellas are shaving off milliseconds and Microsoft's over there charging me a lunch break to move a button.

And finally, a guy sold twenty-five hundred MIDI recorders and wrote up what he learned, and his big conclusion was: hardware's not that hard. Which, respectfully, buddy — that's what everybody says right up until the little plastic clip snaps. But I like him. He made a real thing that a real person holds, and then he told everybody how, for free, which is more than my cable company's ever done for me. Twenty-five hundred people out there making music on his box. That's a nice life.

That's your daily byte. Have a great day. Until next time.

Stories covered

Show HN: I replaced a $120k bowling center system with $1,600 in ESP32s — Hacker News

Qwen 3.8 — Hacker News

Claude Code uses Bun written in Rust now — Hacker News

What I learned selling 2,500 MIDI recorders: Hardware is not so hard — Hacker News

Good morning, it's Sunday. This is Guru's Tech Bytes, episode 105.

First up, this GPT-5.6 thing apparently closed a thirty-year gap in convex optimization. Now I don't know what convex optimization is, I thought convex was a thing about eyeglasses, but somebody typed in a prompt — just typed it, like a text message — and thirty years of nobody figuring it out, gone. Thirty years, Lois. I've had a bag of pretzels in my truck longer than some of these problems have been solved.

Second, somebody made a thing called Transcribe.cpp. And you know what this reminds me of, my cousin had a tape recorder, big one, and he'd hold it up to the radio to record songs and his mom would yell right in the middle of the good part — anyway, so it's transcribing. It turns talking into words on a screen, which is what I've been asking my computer to do since about two thousand and nine, and now it just does it, and it's free, and nobody sent me a bill for a subscription. Heh. Hhh, okay, that's something.

Third, New York City wants landlords and realtors to tell you if they used AI in the listing. Which, honestly, fair. Because I looked at an apartment once where the ad said "cozy sunlit nook" and it was a closet with a lamp in it, and no computer wrote that, that was just a guy lying. So now at least you'll know which one's lying to you.

And finally, some folks got speech recognition and text-to-speech running in under five hundred kilobytes. Five hundred kilobytes. That's smaller than one of those Windows updates that reboots your machine at four in the morning while you're in the middle of nothing, and then sits there at thirty-two percent for an hour like it's thinking about it. These guys fit a whole talking computer in less space than the little icon that tells you the update failed.

That's your daily byte. Have a great day. Until next time.

Stories covered

GPT-5.6 used a prompt to close a 30-year gap in convex optimization — Hacker News

Transcribe.cpp — Hacker News

NYC may require landlords and realtors to disclose the use of AI in listings — Hacker News

Speech Recognition and TTS in less than 500kb — Hacker News

Good morning, it's Saturday. This is Guru's Tech Bytes, episode 104.

First up, Amazon Web Services sent out a billing estimate that said someone owed one-point-seven billion dollars. Billion. With a B. You know what this reminds me of? That time Lois handed me the water bill and I thought we'd been secretly running a car wash out of the basement — turns out it was a decimal thing. Anyway, AWS says it's just an inaccurate estimate, which is a real relaxing thing to hear from the people holding the entire internet.

Second, and this one actually bugged me, nurses over at Kaiser are saying all this AI and camera surveillance stuff is making their jobs worse and the patients worse off too. And look, I'm no genius, but when the people literally keeping you alive say the robot's getting in the way, maybe listen to 'em? A machine can count your heartbeats but it ain't gonna hold your hand when you're scared, is what I'm saying.

Third — and I gotta be careful here 'cause my brain wanders — scientists found an actual atmosphere on one of them Earth-like planets, way out there in the, uh, the Goldilocks zone. The habitable one. That means there could be air, maybe weather, maybe some guy on another planet also fighting with his lawnmower on a Saturday. Kind of makes you feel small. Heh. Hhh, okay, that's something.

And finally, there's this big report on the state of open source AI, which is the free stuff regular people can poke at instead of paying the big companies. Speaking of the big companies — you know, my laptop restarted itself in the middle of the game last night for one of them Microsoft updates, didn't ask, just BAM, black screen, "we're getting things ready." Getting WHAT ready? So yeah, I'm rooting for the open source guys, 'cause at least when the free stuff breaks it's got the decency to break quietly.

That's your daily byte. Have a great day. Until next time.

Stories covered

AWS: Inaccurate Estimated Billing Data – $1.7 billion — Hacker News

Kaiser nurses say AI, surveillance are making their jobs and patient care worse — Hacker News

First atmosphere found on Earth-like planet in habitable zone of distant star — Hacker News

The state of open source AI — Hacker News