Hashtag Single

If you're ready for a different type of dating app experience, I can't wait to introduce you to the badass ladies behind new group dating app FourPlay.  Julie Griggs and Danielle Dietzek were working full time as medical professionals when they decided to develop a dating app with a difference, one that took the pressure off the one-on-one connection and focused on getting single people connecting in the world in real life.

How's it work?  Simple.  You join with a pal, called a "teammate" and you make a team dating profile. Then both of you can swipe individually on other teams. If you like a pair, your teammate will get a notification to check them out.  If both teams swipe right, a group chat is then opened.

Dating strangers on the internet is terrifying for a lot of women and Danielle and Julie had this at the forefront of their mind in creating the antithesis of a dating app, one that's not only like a casual group hangout, but one that provides a layer of safety as well.  

Hope listening to these two inspiring entrepreneurs and besties encourages you to text your single pal "hey... have you heard of FourPlay?" today :) 

What are the three things you're not supposed to bring up in polite conversation? Sex, politics, religion?  Right, well, we're breaking all the rules on this one - cause not only do we talk about all three, but we dive deep into how religion, specifically, hyper-conservative Christian religions, can influence our value systems and our approach to dating and love in general.  What are the challenges of navigating being a single independent woman when you were raised to just be a wife and a mom? 

My guest Stephanie comes from a fundamentalist Christian upbringing, which is particularly strict about modesty/ purity culture (ie, no sex before marriage) as well as the patriarchal family structure of the man's role being first and foremost.  And while many conservative Christians can and do find love and happiness at a young age, what happens if you're 41, single, and childless and finding it hard to relate?  

Our VOP Kyle on the other hand was born outside of a marriage to parents who wanted him to choose a religion on his own, and shares with us his unique perspective on the freedom of choice and what finding love and dating means to him.

We've never done a deep dive on the intersection of dating and religious backgrounds before, and while this can be a dicey subject for some, I was honored to have this super insightful and respectful conversation with two people from two different experiences and points of view.  I hope you find it as illuminating as I did.

***editor's note: I mention in this episode that women didn't have access to birth control in the 70's unless they were married, but in 1972 the Supreme Court legalized birth control for unmarried people.  That still does not mean that all women had access to it, especially women of color and those without access to healthcare.  Additionally, to this day, some states still require a husband or father's signed consent for abortion procedures, so as we all know the conversation about birth control and women's rights over reproduction is ongoing.

YOU GO GIRLFRIEND!!!  We're throwin' it back to the 90's in honor of my birthday this month and the 30th anniversary of It's Just Lunch, a multi-national matchmaking agency founded in 1991 by a busy, professional woman who wanted to make it easier for professionals to date.

So, what was working with a matchmaking agency even like in 1991 when the internet was a baby?  I talk with VP of Sales Sandra Hatton to discuss the biggest thing that has shifted in our culture of dating in thirty years:  verification.  Dating has gone from someone you know (or who knows the person you want to know) to a field of strangers.  And alllll the behaviors that now come with that reality.

Stay tuned till the end where Sandra and I play a game called Dating in 2020 or 2000? .... and Sandra fails epically.

Learn more about It's Just Lunch here!

There's a lot of books for single people about dating.  And a lot of sex books that are written for couples.  Sooo..... why aren't there any sex books specifically written for single people?

Enter Dr. Megan Stubbs, aka the "single sexologist," whose soon-to-be released book, "Playing Without a Partner," was written just for us on the topics of confidence, contentedness, fulfillment, and yes, sex in singledom.

What's it really mean to be alone?  How can this time be beneficial instead of detrimental?  How can we live whole, full lives, experiencing all life has to offer as single people?

These answers PLUS fun sex facts you never knew you wanted to know about, like things that don't mix well with semen, and cum that tastes like... bleach??? Uhhhh....

All this and more, hope you enjoy! :)

Learn more about Dr. Megan here.

Buy Megan's book!

Let's talk about single shaming. 

Chances are, you're been victim to it at least once in your life.  You've been told, directly or indirectly, that since you're clearly so fabulous and still single, that you simply must be doing something wrong!  You're too picky.  Or you're too thin.  Or too loud.  Or too desperate.  The list goes on and on.

And who are the people most likely to be using this disparaging language on us?  Our friends.  Our family.  Even our own mothers.  

To be fair, it's not really their fault.  They have been indoctrinated for decades with society's belief that a woman's worth is determined by her relationship status.  But Dr. Karin and I are not havin that, and we take a super deep dive discussing all this and more from her acclaimed book, "Single is the New Black: Don't Wear White 'Til It's Right," as well as her experiences from her background as a psychology professor for ten years in Chicago, as well as from her time being an accomplished (yet single) woman in her late 30's. 

It's a super juicy episode so buckle up and put on your women's empowerment body armor for this excellent episode helping us celebrate International Women's History Month!

Learn more about Dr. Karin here.

Work with Dr. Karin here.

Follow Dr. Karin @dr.karin on IG for all sorts of love, fabulous conversation, and advice!