Hey Jacob, Hi Scott

In this conversation, Jacob and Scott talk about choices, about the belief systems we build around the choices we make, and how we can stop limiting what is possible for ourselves and instead open ourselves up to the boundless imagination of life. Jacob shares a beautiful story reflecting on a profound moment of surrender in his life, and the friends discuss the power of surrender versus the paralysis of resistance. Scott shares his frustrations with social media and his (likely) upcoming, difficult decision to deactivate his Facebook author and personal page. They also talk about the earthing/grounding movement, and their experiences with their respective grounding mats, as well as the positive ways in which science can support the exploration of metaphysical (and generally unexplainable) realities.

Visit www.gatheringofthecreatives.com to join Jacob in Santa Fe this September! Use code JACOBFRIEND for $50 off your registration. 

Books mentioned: 

The Untethered Soul, and The Surrender Experiment – by Michael Singer

The Alchemist, and Aleph – by Paulo Coelho

Reading: Paulo Coelho, from Aleph

Signs are an extremely personal language that we develop throughout our lives, by trial and error, until we begin to understand that God is guiding us.

In this conversation, Jacob and Scott dive into the complexities of relationships, and the need in sustainable relationships — whether romantic, platonic or familial — for honest communication and a desire to grow together. The friends draw on their own experiences in past relationships to highlight the healthy and unhealthy ways they’ve shown up with others, and with themselves. They discuss the importance of speaking the things that continue to be left unsaid, and trusting that by doing so, you move a relationship forward, even when forward doesn’t look like you’d expect. Above all, the friends invite us to consider the relationships to which we give our most energy and whether or not that energy is well served.

Reading: Pema Chödrön

“The only reason we don't open our hearts and minds to other people is that they trigger confusion in us that we don't feel brave enough or sane enough to deal with. To the degree that we look clearly and compassionately at ourselves, we feel confident and fearless about looking into someone else's eyes. ”

In this conversation, Jacob and Scott talk about the ways in which we can curate our choices to create more peace, or joy, or meaning in our lives. They discuss the importance of giving yourself over to the energy of YES when it comes to your relationship with yourself, and thereby inviting in your imagination to create new possibilities in your day-to-day. The friends invite us all to look at where we’re centering our focus and how we feel by doing so, and to remember that the more we allow for thoughts, words and actions that feel empowering, the more empowered we naturally become. Rather than a reading, they end this episode with a guided visualization that carries us away to one of Scott’s favorite places on the planet.

In this conversation, Jacob and Scott talk about body image, and their personal relationships with their bodies. They reflect on how we’ve all been conditioned to see only certain bodies as beautiful, and how difficult (seemingly impossible) it can be to transcend this harmful conditioning. Especially for women, because the conditioning is that much more intense. Both share deep-seated insecurities they carry and how their relationships with these insecurities have and have not changed. As they explore the body-positivity movement, they also look at our excessively triggered society and realize they are triggered by how triggered people can be. This is one of their most revealing conversations to date.

Readings: Anne Lamott

“Oh my God, what if you wake up someday, and you're 65, or 75, and you never got your memoir or novel written, or you didn't go swimming in those warm pools and oceans all those years because your thighs were jiggly and you had a nice big comfortable tummy; or you were just so strung out on perfectionism and people-pleasing that you forgot to have a big juicy creative life, of imagination and radical silliness and staring off into space like when you were a kid? It's going to break your heart. Don't let this happen.”

“Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people. It will keep you cramped and insane your whole life, and it is the main obstacle between you and a shitty first draft. I think perfectionism is based on the obsessive belief that if you run carefully enough, hitting each stepping-stone just right, you won't have to die. The truth is that you will die anyway and that a lot of people who aren't even looking at their feet are going to do a whole lot better than you, and have a lot more fun while they're doing it.”

In this conversation, Jacob and Scott talk about the many aspects of sharing oneself, either creatively, spiritually, or from a healing perspective. They look at the need to focus on the specific gifts you feel called to share, rather than on how many people respond to those gifts, or how they respond, or how much money your specific offerings generate. The friends talk about money dynamics and hone in on our energetic relationship with money (and all things) and the possibility and benefit of realigning ourselves in healthier ways to money (and all things). They discuss establishing an aware yet friendly relationship with our egos, and the beautiful possibilities that come with allowing the heart to lead and the mind to act as support staff. Embedded in much of this discussion, as always, is a call to get honest with ourselves, and to trust in what that honesty, when aligned with love, can create in our lives.

Books mentioned:

Sacred Economics by George Eisenstein

The Soul of Money by Lynne Twist

Reading: Tosha Silver

Divine Beloved,

Allow me to give with complete ease and abundance,

knowing You are the unlimited Source of All.

Let me be an easy open conduit for Your prosperity.

Let me trust that all of my own needs are

always met in amazing ways

and it is safe to give freely as my heart guides me.

And equally, allow me to feel wildly open to receiving.

May I know my own value, beauty and

worthiness without question.

Let me allow others the supreme pleasure of giving to me.

Let me feel worthy to receive in every possible way.

Change me into One who can fully love, forgive

and accept myself so I may carry your Light

without restriction.

Let everything that needs to go, go.

Let everything that needs to come, come.

I am utterly Your own.

You are Me.

I am You.

We are One.

All is well.

In this conversation, Jacob and Scott take a deep dive into forgiveness. Does everyone deserve forgiveness? Is it a necessary part of healing? How do we (if we even want to) forgive the unforgivable? Scott shares his process of finding forgiveness for the man who killed his parents, and by doing so relieving himself of years of rage, hatred and blame. The friends talk about the path to forgiveness, the unhealthy pressure to forgive, fake forgiveness, and self-forgiveness. It’s an incredibly powerful episode focused on one of the most provocative and important subjects out there.

Here’s what Scott read, by Mark Nepo:

I have seen myself doing what was done to me, 

never as cruel or as harsh. 

But it has been enough to make me tremble at how easy it is 

to be cruel when afraid, and how difficult it is to accept 

that we are all capable of terrible things, 

and how cleansing it is to realize that 

true kindness breathes just beneath this acceptance.

In this conversation, Jacob and Scott talk about dealing with loneliness and disconnection, particularly during this time in our world where there is such uncertainty and so many calls for separation and divisiveness. They reflect on core questions like “Who am I?” and “Why am I here?” and the importance of being able to answer these questions from a practical as well as spiritual level. They also dive into conditioning, specifically around the compulsive need to be productive. Both Jacob and Scott share, with openness and vulnerability, their current struggles and how they’re currently navigating through some of life’s less pleasant waters. This is perhaps the deepest and most expansive episode to date.

Here’s the poem Jacob read: 

Desiderata by Max Ehrmann

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,

and remember what peace there may be in silence.

As far as possible without surrender

be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly;

and listen to others,

even the dull and the ignorant;

they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons,

they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others,

you may become vain and bitter;

for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;

it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs;

for the world is full of trickery.

But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;

many persons strive for high ideals;

and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.

Especially, do not feign affection.

Neither be cynical about love;

for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment

it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,

gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.

But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.

Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,

be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe,

no less than the trees and the stars;

you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you,

no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,

whatever you conceive Him to be,

and whatever your labors and aspirations,

in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,

it is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful.

Strive to be happy.

*This episode was recorded at cabins in the woods on both ends! There was a tech glitch near the end but we cleaned that up as well as we could, you'll just miss the usual sign-offs. 

In this conversation, Jacob and Scott talk about…

* the rollercoaster of thoughts that play through our minds

* remembering our humanity within whatever we’re feeling

* the intensity of these current times and the many uncertainties

* making time for nature, no matter where you are (plants!)

* the power of visualizing nature through meditation

* not “shoulding” our thoughts away, not even the hard ones

* the fears and insecurities we feel at major crossroads

* how we stay in miserable situations just to avoid the fear of change

* our soul’s desire for evolution, not comfort

* Jacob’s decision process in ending his marriage

* the importance of focusing on the potential benefits of a change, especially because our minds will always focus on the negatives

* the ability within each of us to call on our courage, to be willing to be courageous

* distinguishing between an intuitive impulse and an ego-driven impulse

* taking small steps when making big changes

* the willingness to consider our comfort, especially in uncomfortable situations

* our inherent intuitive gifts

* Jacob’s experience doing the exercises he recommended in his own book

Here’s the poem Scott read today, by e.e. cummings:

I thank You God for most this amazing day

For the leaping greenly spirits of trees

And a blue true dream of sky

And for everything which is natural, which is infinite, which is yes

I who have died am alive again today

And this is the sun's birthday

This is the birth day of life and of love and wings

And of the gay great happening illimitably earth

How should tasting, touching, hearing, seeing, breathing any

Lifted from the no of all nothing

Human merely being doubt unimaginable You?

Now the ears of my ears awake

And now the eyes of my eyes are opened

In this conversation, Jacob and Scott talk about…

* the things our minds tell us when we need a break from productivity

* i.e., you don’t have value if you’re not working

* i.e., you are worthless period

* the healing power of creating daily practices

* the impact of the Industrial Revolution on our need to be productive

* the overwhelming nature of the information onslaught

* the importance of being selective with what information we consume

* how the things we suppress can oppress us in return

* the power (and difficulty) of shining love on those you don’t like

* letting go of putting your healing on a specific timetable

* the importance of acknowledging our successes, however small

* creating space for rest

* being intentional about carving out needed space in our lives

* practices for clearing negative energy from our beings

* the value of creating personal rituals

* the need, at times, to just stop

* the need for a more holistic approach to mental well-being

* creating the kind of life you don’t need to escape from

Books mentioned:

Ishmael by Daniel Quinn

The War of Art by Steven Pressfield

Inner Work by Robert A. Johnson

Article mentioned:

Bring Back the Nervous Breakdown, in The Atlantic, March 2021 issue

The Still Cup - Hafiz (translated by Daniel Ladinsky)

For

In this episode, Jacob and Scott talk about the importance of rest in a world bent on productivity, as well as their respective understandings of what God is, and how the divine manifests in our beings and in our world. Happy Full SuperMoon in Scorpio!

Here’s what Scott read today, from Braiding Sweetgrass, by Robin Wall Kimmerer:

Even a wounded world is feeding us. 

Even a wounded world holds us, giving us moments of wonder and joy. 

I choose joy over despair. 

Not because I have my head in the sand, 

but because joy is what the earth gives me daily and I must return the gift.