One of the aspects of common humanity and parenting is that we are all doing the best we can and trying to inflict the least amount of damage possible on our kids.

 

Some days it feels like a hallmark movie and other days, an MMA pay-per-view special. And on some days, it is both. Anyone who tries to pretend it's anything different is just full of crap.

 

So here's what I've started reminding myself and I encourage you to do the same as you continue on the journey of parenting your transgender kiddos, particularly during the holidays:

 

There is no path for this.

 

You are basically pioneering the Wild West of the gender frontier.

 

And we are certainly in this with you and ready to support and help in any way that we can. But there isn’t a formula, model, one size fits all, or crystal ball that will show you what to do. There are no guarantees.

 

The only real magic we have is the love and connection we give to our kiddos and to each other.

 

So as you head into the holiday season, knowing that there's not a path to follow, I want to leave you with a few things to consider when trying to shift this holiday from a hard, grief-filled time to one of joy, gratitude, magic, and love for your kiddos.

 

Happy Holidays!

Listen to the full episode to hear:

• Some ways you can shift this holiday from a hard and grief-filled time to one of joy and gratitude.
• How wrong the myth is that therapists have got it all figured out
• How the desire to be a pleaser, keep the peace, and not have needs can really mean you are striving for the status of invisibility
• How there is no path for this and how the only way out of this wilderness is through it. Do not try to pretend it isn't happening. It will only make it worse.
• This is an awkward journey. You are going to make mistakes. That's okay. You’ve got this!

Find out more about Mackenzie Dunham:

• wildheartsociety.org
• Wild Heart Society on Facebook
• Wild Heart Society on Instagram

Gift Ideas:

• For Trans Boys: Chest binders - gc2b.co
• Swimwear: tomboyX.com; dapperboi.com
• Teen Vogue - Best Gifts For Your Transgender Loved Ones
• Huffington Post - Trans Youth Girfts
• Buzz Feed - Gifts That Support the Trans Community

Resources:

• The TransSanta Project
• Extra Support: www.thetrevorproject.org