Honestly, Dear Listener

This week on Honestly, Dear Listener, we’re delving into the universal topic of burnout. We’ll explore the cyclical and seasonal nature of life and the relentless pressure to stay productive in our capitalistic society. We’ll discuss strategies like creating flexible schedules for those UN-ideal days and how listening to the wisdom of our bodies can be the very thing that leads us out of burnout.

We’ll also talk about how finding bugs is kind of like grooming oneself and how Emily is a friend of insects everywhere.

References:

• Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle - book by Emily Nagoski, PhD and Amelia Nagoski, DMA

• Carrie’s Substack: Follow her!

• “How to Write Consistently on a Daily Basis (Without Burning Out)” - Substack post by Lea Bardot of Write. Grow. Monetize.

  
  

  TIMECODES
  0:00 - Intro
  0:30 - Carrie eats bugs
  3:19 - Emily is friends with bugs
  10:05 - Let’s talk about burnout
  11:04 - Emily’s relationship with burnout
  12:16 - Carrie’s burnout life
  14:52 - Cycles in nature
  15:19 - Pushing ourselves
  20:02 - Too high expectations for ourselves
  21:57 - Ignoring our bodies
  30:11 - Creating our Ideal Schedule Menu
  35:50 - Trusting the wisdom of our bodies
  40:24 - We almost always have more options than we think - CHOICE!
  41:50 - Burnout when you work full time for someone else

It's Honestly, Dear Listener's 40th episode! This week, we're talking about how we know when we've "made it" in our art. But first! A riveting discussion about Emily stumbling upon human fecal matter on a daily basis in New York City. We also discuss how poop is the great equalizer of humanity and how "ladylikeness" is a tool of the patriarchy.
We dive into what "making it" actually means and how we define success. We also talk about how we are responsible for our own happiness and how we as artists can find delight in making the every day magical.

This week on Honestly, Dear Listener, we take a deep dive into the artist’s superpower: sensitivity. We discuss our personal struggles with criticism and the delicate balance of caring about others’ opinions while protecting our creative spirit. We also talk about how our sensitivity is like a knob that we can turn up and down depending on the situation and that, by strengthening that muscle, we give ourselves many more options than we originally thought we had.

We also discuss the New York City subway system and how it’s both confusing and charming.

Resources:

• The Best of Me - book by David Sedaris

• Signs of a Psychopath - television show on MAX (formerly HBO)

• Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear - book by Elizabeth Gilbert

• The Highly Sensitive Person - book by Dr. Elaine Aron

  • Are You Highly Sensitive Self test

TIMECODES

0:00 Intro
0:33 No Period Club
3:00 Train story
10:57 We need to be around people
12:34 Everybody’s a baby
15:48 Sensitivity
18:27 Sensitivity and patriarchy
21:12 How sensitivity is great
26:52 Empathy/Treasure hunt
31:15 Turning down our sensitivity knob
47:10 Guarding/protecting our sensitivity
49:47 The mountain Carrie’s willing to die on

This week on Honestly, Dear Listener, we’re talking about self-promotion and why it’s so easy to promote others, but it’s so hard when it comes to ourselves. We wade into the all-too-loaded worded “bragging”<—what is it and how can we transcend the word to get to what we really mean underneath: the desire to share our creation babies with the world.

We also discuss what Carrie is up to now that she’s 40 years-old including her commitment to writing every day. Finally, we reflect on the word “goulash.”

References:

• Carrie’s Substack // Follow Carrie’s Writing Here —> carrieschaeffer.substack.com

• “Licking Ourselves Up Off the Floor” - an original poem by Carrie Schaeffer

• Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear, book by Elizabeth Gilbert

  
  

TIMECODES
0:00 - Introduction
0:39 - Internet Woes
4:13 - Carrie is 40
7:15 - Looking back on decades
9:46 - Carrie’s poem - “Licking Ourselves Up Off the Floor”
13:57 - We’re back
15:03 - Putting ourselves out there
20:50 - Bragging
26:23 - Christianity and Humility
40:50 - Competitive Bragging vs. Joyful Sharing
52:17 - What do we do?
55:24 - What is goulash?

This week, we have a treat, but first, a little history:

I (Carrie) first started the Honestly, Dear Listener podcast all the way back in 2014—things were a little different back then. The show ran for two seasons, each episode was shorter (about 15-20 minutes in length), and it was more produced and way more edited than the longer form conversations Emily and I have today on the podcast. The focus was much the same as it is today—I would interview artists on what it’s like being a creative, and we talked a lot about mindset and process. I did the show for 2014 and again in 2016, and then I had two little boys, life sped up to mach crazy, and I took a big fat break.

Then, fast forward literally a decade, and Emily and I were having these weekly conversations on Zoom about the exact same stuff you hear us talk about on the podcast today, and she casually mentioned that she was thinking it would be cool to start a podcast, and I was like—well, I already have one, and it’s all set up and ready to go if you want to be my co-host! She said yes, and we together, we launched the 2023 reboot - also known as Season 3 of the Honestly, Dear Listener podcast.

So today, we’re re-airing episode 2 from of Season 1 (first aired 4.18.14) where I’m interviewing my very first guest I ever had on the podcast which is none other than the current co-host of Honestly Dear Listener—Emily Hatch!

We hope you enjoy, Dear Listener!

This week, we have a treat, but first, a little history:

I (Carrie) first started the Honestly, Dear Listener podcast all the way back in 2014—things were a little different back then. The show ran for two seasons, each episode was shorter (about 15-20 minutes in length), and it was more produced and way more edited than the longer form conversations Emily and I have today on the podcast. The focus was much the same as it is today—I would interview artists on what it’s like being a creative, and we talked a lot about mindset and process. I did the show for 2014 and again in 2016, and then I had two little boys, life sped up to mach crazy, and I took a big fat break.

Then, fast forward literally a decade, and Emily and I were having these weekly conversations on Zoom about the exact same stuff you hear us talk about on the podcast today, and she casually mentioned that she was thinking it would be cool to start a podcast, and I was like—well, I already have one, and it’s all set up and ready to go if you want to be my co-host! She said yes, and we together, we launched the 2023 reboot - also known as Season 3 of the Honestly, Dear Listener podcast.

So today, we’re re-airing episode 2 from of Season 1 (first aired 4.18.14) where I’m interviewing my very first guest I ever had on the podcast which is none other than the current co-host of Honestly Dear Listener—Emily Hatch!

We hope you enjoy, Dear Listener!

We all have at least one boulder in our lives.
The people who are where we wish we could be.
And these boulders seem to sit right in the middle of our path, blocking our way to success.

This week, we interview soul singer and long-time friend (see picture below!) Miss Emily about insecurity, fear, and transforming the people who intimidate us into people who inspire us.

Music:

• "Sneaky Snitch" & "Fun in a Bottle" by Kevin McLeod
• "Lady Marmalade" by Bob Crewe & Kenny Nolan
  Performed by Miss Emily, Steve Williams, John Schultz, Fernie Garcia, & Bill Moody
• "Sweet Sunlight" by Miss Emily
• "Holiness" by Scott Carl Underwood

Hosts: Emily Hatch and Carrie Schaeffer
Instagram: @honestlydearlistener
Youtube: youtube.com/@honestlydearlistener

This week on Honestly, Dear Listener, we delve into the complexities of breaking free from familiar yet unproductive patterns and embracing a more playful mindset. By comparing the focus needed for meditation to maintaining a playful mindset, we emphasize the importance of catching oneself driving away from what really brings us joy and redirecting. In general, we go so fast in our lives, often forgetting to slow down and reexamine what it is in the world we really want. So, this week, we posit the idea that to actually get to where you want to get to (speed up), you actually have to slow down and reassess what you’re doing for joy and what is bogging you down.

We also dive into a rousing discussion about eating bugs—both accidentally and on purpose.

TIMESTAMPS
0:00 Introduction
0:37 On Eating Bugs
6:46 Laryngeal Manipulation 
11:27 The Peanuts Gallery Podcast announcement
15:28 Carrie’s Likability
19:56 Driving Ourselves Forward
27:15 Creating Our Own Rubric
30:00 Anxiety about Wasted Potential
36:14 Heavy Adult Energy vs. Creative Kid Energy

References:

• On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft - book by Stephen King

• The Peanuts Gallery - podcast with Patricia Patts and Carrie Schaeffer