Why is it that we hear, "Why doesn't he or she leave?" How about "Why did they abuse?" Let's five into some common reasons abusers abuse.

Let's dive into self-soothing techniques on today's #soulfulsunday

So what is Trauma Bonding? I'll be talking about this and more in this episode plus steps to break that cycle period

Suggestions to keep 'YOU" safe during the holidaysThis time of the year is supposed to be joyous and happy but if you are a victim of abuse it can be a nightmare.You may have heightened stressors as you potentially experience any of these: Financial issues- lack of funds from overspending, job loss, or layoff. Getting together with family- While normally can be wonderful there could be pressures or conflict on top of dealing with your abuser. Increased alcohol/drug use- It is not uncommon for the usage of these to be more abundant. Vacation- Your partner or loved one may be off for an extended time causing more heated exchanges.What can you do?! 1) Keep your phone charged at all times. Make sure you have trusted contacts on speed dial. This could be calling: 911 in the States for immediate assistance- Teach your children this number too! Family or Friend- These can help pull you out of a heated situation or act as a witness. Consider using a "Safe word" such as Cookies or Eggnog for a text or while you are on the phone. This can alert the person that you need help NOW.Shelters and Resources-The Hotline - 1-800-799-7233 1-800-787-3224 (TTY) En EspañolSafe Horizon -1-800-621-HOPE (4673)NCADV - Resources page for National and International helpAbused Deaf Women's Advocacy Services (ADWAS) provides advocacy services for Deaf and DeafBlind survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault. http://www.adwas.org/Sexual Assault Hotline- https://www.rainn.org/Suicide prevention- https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/International- https://internationalwomenshouse.org/get-help 2) Along with the safe word tip, if you have a good relationship with your neighbor think about having a certain color light that can be lit when if you need assistance. If they feel comfortable they may ring the doorbell or knock to check. They could also call the police for you to do a wellness check.3) Download a safety app such as - Circle of 64) If you are meeting your abuser for a visitation exchange contact a friend to go with you. If you can not find a friend, make sure this is done either in the daylight or in a public well-lit area. Contact your local police department and give them the short version of your situation and ask if they can meet for the exchange. They are happy to assist with this and will give you instructions on how to handle the situation. 5) If you are still with your abuser make sure you have an escape plan. Don't back yourself into a corner or room without a window. 6) Contact your local shelter for a Safety plan. You may not be leaving this second but empower yourself with knowledge of how to handle an escalated situation. 7) Consider having a "Go bag" ready just in case. You may want to keep this bag in an inconspicuous place or at a trusted friend's home. In this bag, you will have an extra pair of clothes, a 7 to 10 day supply of medication, extra keys to the house/car, snacks, a cell phone charger, and spare change. Be safe! Know you are not alone in your struggle. If you need to talk feel free to message me privately. For support and for encouragement after you have experienced emotional trauma for women only check out The Survivors Cafe.Find me here- https://linktr.ee/melindakunst

I often hear, "Melinda, how do I know if I'm healing?" Here are some signs to lookout for...

💗 Setting Boundaries without guilt.

💗 Making "You" a priority.

💗 You feel more confident.

And more...

#toxicrelationships #domesticabuseawareness #traumainformedcoach #domesticviolenceawareness

Leaving can be hard. Healing can be hard. You feel alone. Here is something you need to know...

Join me and my Guest, Jaime Hornickel, as she shares the mission that was created in memory of her Son, LCPL Dayton Hornickel. Our mission is to raise suicide awareness for our fellow veterans and families by: raising funds for local and national veteran suicide prevention programs, promoting prevention resources and connecting with families that have lost a veteran by suicide. The 1441 Foundation is made up of family and friends who have all suffered the loss of a loved one to veteran suicide. We also are a large military & first responder family. We want to connect with and provide comfort and resources to families who are surviving this same devastating loss, as well as veterans themselves. If you are a veteran or a surviving family member, please let us know how we can help you. We want you to know you are not alone, tomorrow needs you and we need each other. Standing Together Keeps Us from Falling Apart. If you know someone that needs help or for more information about The 1441 Foundation find them here: