In today's episode, I have some tips for leaving your abuser as well as information about this upcoming retreat on June 1st.

Here are links to mentioned in today's podcast.

Solo date challenge Women's Community- https://www.facebook.com/share/pRGqDGUFjFyPmrjg/?mibextid=A7sQZp

Charmaine Moore, Face of Hope and Beauty- https://www.instagram.com/faceofhopeandbeauty?igsh=MTZycjAxZTVpcjFtMg==

Snag a ticket here-https://www.eventbrite.com/e/letting-go-tickets-880924347437?utm-campaign=social&utm-content=attendeeshare&utm-medium=discovery&utm-term=listing&utm-source=cp&aff=ebdsshcopyurl

I went off on a tangent on this episode of today's what's healing look like? Today's episode was entirely unscripted and I'm going to apologize in advance. It kinda goes all over the place, but I hope you stick with it and me. I'd appreciate it and let me know what you thought about today's episode.

Find tickets to this year's retreat here- https://www.eventbrite.com/e/letting-go-tickets-880924347437?utm-campaign=social&utm-content=attendeeshare&utm-medium=discovery&utm-term=listing&utm-source=cp&aff=ebdsshcopyurl

17 years ago, I left my abuser for the first time. What happened?! Here's the scoop...

This may be a tough one to ask yourself! Sometimes, we know in our hearts and minds that a relationship is not good for us. Or we keep certain people in our life out of obligation because they are family or you've known them for so long.

This may mean distancing yourself from your parent(s), sister, brother, and so on. Here's a few more questions to ask yourself:

When this person is around, do I feel drained?

Do I feel relieved when they leave?

Give yourself permission to let go of those who aren't lifting you up. Even if it's just for a season.

Have you tried this? How did it go?

In part one I talked about what manipulation looks like and what it tools, you can use if you feel that you are being manipulated by someone. In today's episode, I dive into what

Do you know what manipulation looks like? Let's dive into this on today's episode.

*Sorry for the noise in the background. My youngest decided it was a good time to eat breakfast*

What is Emotional Blackmail?

This person may threaten to harm you or hurt themselves in order to get what they want or for you to do their bidding. Dr. Susan Forward coined the term emotional blackmail in her 1997 book “Emotional Blackmail: When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation, and Guilt to Manipulate You.” Find this here- https://amzn.to/49mDckT

Who does this?

Someone that in the past may have experienced:

Abandonment

Moments they were made to feel unloved.

Someone that has a narcissistic behavior

Experienced trauma or abuse

They have a low self esteem and low self worth

Experienced blame or shame as a child

They use this as a tool to keep control over someone they love or what they perceive as love. The victim feels guilt, fear or shame which is what the blackmailer wants. In many cases the blackmailer is just bluffing but the victim doesn’t know this or if they do they could be just so worn down they comply hesitantly.

It looks like:

A demand that could be very subtle or literally in your face. You may try to ignore or resist the demand but the blackmailer keeps up the pressure for you to do whatever it is. If that isn’t working they will start making threats to harm you, your children, family, furbabies or themselves. You then are so tired of this cycle that may go on and on for hours or days and you give in to their demands. This will play out so many more times in your relationship.

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The holidays can be a wonderful time of togetherness but it can be an uncomfortable time for kids. Here's a few tips.

And today's episode, we are diving into some tips to help you while you're dealing with heartache!