How I Unf**ked My Life

If you're waiting to wake up one morning suddenly feeling ready to change your life, you'll be waiting a long time.

Calm by Intention is about one thing: learning how to make intentional decisions every single day so you can create the life you actually want, instead of just reacting to what's happening to you. Often, the most powerful decision isn't what you start doing—it's what you finally decide to quit.

In this episode—Part 1 of an ongoing series—I'm diving into the choices I made in my 50s to stop tolerating what was keeping me stuck and start deciding for myself.

Hit play, grab this week's challenge, and stay tuned—because this list is only getting started.

We make hundreds of decisions every single day. But here's the question: Are you choosing your direction, or are you just letting life happen to you and making default choices to survive the day?

A single 60-minute weekly session—whether it's coaching, therapy, or a Sunday reset—can't unfuck a life that's running on unintentional autopilot for the other 167 hours. In this episode of How I Unfucked My Life, we talk about why relying on temporary fixes keeps you trapped in a loop of returning to the same problems, and how real change only happens when you start making intentional decisions.

It's not just about making choices—it's about actively deciding where your life is going, setting your direction, and aligning your daily actions with the peace you actually want in your finances, your relationships, and your mind.

In this episode, we cover:

• The trap of passive decision-making vs. choosing with intention

• Why a 60-minute session gives temporary relief without changing your trajectory

• How to spot where you're making choices on autopilot—and take back control

• How small, intentional micro-decisions build long-term calm and directional momentum

If this episode hit home, subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who needs to take the wheel in their life today!

Look, we treat this one word like it's a total biohazard. We avoid it at all costs, and we let it completely crush us when it happens.

Failure.

In this episode, we're stripping the heavy, suffocating weight right off this word. Somehow, we got it into our heads that messing up or having things go sideways means we are the failure. That it somehow defines our actual worth.

It doesn't. Not even close.

Failure is just a stepping stone. In fact, let's be entirely honest: if you aren't failing, you aren't actually living. It means you're playing it so safe that you're just sitting on the sidelines.

Let's cut the noise and talk about how to stop letting a setback define who you are, how to use it to take the next step, and how to actually start living out loud.

Real talk. No fluff. Every Tuesday in your inbox.

The life you want isn't locked away somewhere out of reach.

The door is open. It's always been open.

You're the one slamming it shut.

In this episode of How I Unfucked My Life Christine DeGrazia gets brutally honest about the two words that keep you on the wrong side of your own life. Not bad luck. Not other people. Not circumstances.

Two words you say every single day without realizing what they're costing you.

I can't.

Except most of the time — you can. You just won't. Or you're scared. Or staying where you are feels safer than walking through.

This episode is for anyone who is tired of standing at the door watching their own life happen without them.

Topics covered:

• Why I can't is almost never actually true
• How those two words become your entire identity
• The difference between I can't and I won't
• How to stop slamming the door on your own life for good

Tired of garbage advice? Same. Join the list

You have been told your whole life to push through the hard. Do it scared. No pain no gain. And that is great advice — for the right kind of hard.

But nobody is talking about the other kind.

The kind where you work harder and harder and get nowhere. Where every door you push stays closed. Where you are exhausted in a way that has nothing to do with effort. Where something deep down keeps telling you this is not right — but you keep pushing anyway because you were taught that resistance means try harder.

In this episode, we are talking about the difference between the hard that is growing you and the hard that is warning you. Because they feel similar. But they lead to completely different places.

If you have been grinding away at something and wondering why nothing is moving — this one is for you.

You know who I mean. The person who seems to have it all together. The perfect vacation. The perfect body. The perfect house. The perfect relationship. The life that looks like everything you are supposed to want.

You have been measuring yourself against them for a long time. And it is costing you more than you realize.

Here is the thing — they are not real. You are not comparing yourself to a real person. You are comparing yourself to a performance. A carefully constructed highlight reel that was filtered and framed before it ever hit your screen.

In this episode of How I Unfucked My Life, Christine breaks down exactly what comparison is doing to your confidence and self-worth, why you are also performing FOR the imaginary audience in your head, and how to finally come back to your own life — the real one that is happening right now while you are busy staring at someone else's fiction.

Topics covered:

• Why you're comparing yourself to a highlight reel not a real life
• What comparison is actually doing to you drip by drip
• The imaginary audience you're performing for and how to fire them
• Why your real messy life is worth more than their fake, perfect one
• How to actually break the comparison habit for good

Decision paralysis is one of the sneakiest sources of chronic stress — and almost nobody is talking about it that way. In this episode of How I Unfucked My Life, Christine DeGrazia breaks down why making decisions feels so overwhelming, why the fear of getting it wrong is keeping you completely stuck, and why indecision is actually the most stressful choice you can make.

Christine walks you through why there are no right or wrong decisions — only different directions — and why that fantasy of the path you didn't take is lying to you. You'll learn how to stop second-guessing decisions you've already made, how to actually commit to a choice without the anxiety spiral, and how making a decision — even an imperfect one — is one of the most powerful stress relief tools you have.

If you've been sitting on something, going back and forth, losing sleep over a choice you can't seem to make — this episode is for you.

Topics covered:

• Why decision paralysis causes chronic stress
• How to stop fearing the wrong decision
• Why indecision is a choice — and the most stressful one
• The stepping stone reframe that changes everything
• How to make decisions without anxiety
• Why the what-ifs are lying to you

You did everything right. You prepared. You showed up. You gave it everything you had. And then it still didn't go the way you planned.

And the next morning you woke up wondering if any of it was worth it.

In this episode Christine gets completely raw about the morning after one of her biggest speaking engagements — when she woke up with $3 in her bank account, a talk that didn't land the way she hoped, and a very real thought that maybe it was time to give up on everything she'd been building.

She didn't.

And what happened next changed everything.

Because here's what nobody tells you about the hard days — sometimes they're not punishment. Sometimes they're preparation. Sometimes the universe uses your worst morning to burn down what isn't working so something better can be built.

Sometimes you need the shit… to shine.

This episode is for anyone who has ever had a morning where they wanted to quit. Where the doubt was louder than the dream. Where keeping going felt impossible.

You needed to hear this one.

You've been carrying it for years. The anger. The resentment. The replay. And the person who hurt you? They've moved on. Or they're gone. Either way, you're the one still suffering.

In this episode, we're talking about forgiveness. Not the "forgive and forget" version you've heard a hundred times. The real version. The one that has nothing to do with them and everything to do with you.

Because here's the truth — every day you stay stuck is a day they win. And they've already taken enough from you.

This episode covers what forgiveness actually is (and isn't), what carrying resentment does to your body and nervous system, who you might need to forgive, including yourself, and why the best revenge is a life well lived.

This one might hit hard. Good. You needed to hear it.

Have you ever walked away from a relationship, a job, or a situation and wondered — was that me? Was I the problem?

In this episode, I'm going somewhere I've been hesitant to go. I'm talking about what happens when you get so lost in someone else's narrative that you start to believe it. About the difference between being the problem and surviving one. About trauma bonding, identity loss, and what life actually looks like on the other side.

This one is for the woman who was told she was crazy. Who believed it. Who doesn't recognize the version of herself that came out the other side.

I was that woman. And I have some things to say.