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As single parents, sometimes our schedules and all the tactical things we have to get done can eat up our time and suddenly we find that we don’t have time for God. We can get disconnected from a sense of spiritual balance and lose our sense of belonging. Often, we may not feel connected to anything, which can make us isolate even more.

There are many things that can create a disconnection from God. Sometimes we go to other people or things for our security and connection point. We can create idols without even realizing it. Sometimes we feel forgotten, broken and end up feeling nothing. We can feel so damaged that we wonder so why would anyone want us and that we are a disappointment to God. So we wonder where we do we even fit anymore. 

So how do we get back to the place of finding true spiritual balance or alignment – for some of us maybe for the first time.

Spiritual balance isn’t just about memorizing Bible verses. It’s about true connection. This comes from embracing two components:

Spiritual identity

Spiritual connection

Spiritual identity is working toward connection based on whose we are. It’s operating from our actual identities instead of the false identities we tend to create.

Before we became physical beings, we were actually spiritual beings. We’re a soul with a temporary body. As we grow up, the we take on new identities based on how the world sees us. An identity built from shame, burden, performance, family, career, etc. All of these physical and emotional things can become our identities. They cover up the real “you” – who God created us to be.

We start letting the physical and emotional things become our identities, but they aren’t healthy identities.

When those things are taken away, it’s extremely uncomfortable. We don’t know who we are anymore. But God wants us like this – He wants us dependent on Him instead of those other things. Those things aren’t as important as we think they are. Those things being taken away can be the most important thing to ever happen to us. The reason for that is God wants us to know His love is based on who we are, not what we do. We are deeply loved daughters and sons.

This is our true identity.

Keeping your true identity front and center can be difficult. Some ways to do this are:

Writing affirmations or reminders of who we are and posting them around the house and office. Or just speaking the truth out loud. These can combat the lies that are always flying around.

Once we are more in tune with who we are, we can begin to open ourselves up for Spiritual Connection. But we have to create intentional space to do this – schedule your priorities.

Once we create space in our schedules, it’s important to learn the ways we connect.

Connection can happen in journaling as a prayer to God and being completely vulnerable with Him. Another is through worship music. Meditation, visualization and being still can also help us connect in a deep way.

If you’re just starting off and need to take a first step, start by being more still. Lean in and ask God to show you what He’s trying to teach you in this time of growth and learning. God is glorified in your weakness and He will make all things perfect. Focus on getting to the core of your spiritual identity and then find intimate connection.

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